a better life, art, authenticness, awareness, beauty, change management, chaos, consciousness, decisions, Energy, examined life, game of life, gracefullness, Imagination, love, mind, mind-muscle connection, order, responsibility, risk, self, self discipline, self love, skills, time, training, trust, you, your life

Creativity evolves from a state of child-like innocence

Find YOU.
Find clarity.
Find Life.

Art in a state of child-like innocence 
I have always enjoyed art and creating stuff since I was a child in pre-school (& also loved mathematics & science ).

I do art in many forms- sculpture of the human physique; photography, sketching; fine-line art of beautiful building architecture; trees 🌳 and nature and just simple – lines and dots.

In year 7 I recall my High School Art teacher 👩‍🏫, a lovely woman called Mrs Frost, teaching us the basic approach drawing ✍️… beginning with lines and visualisation of the subject you would like to draw and then you draw. Writing a story had an “outline” first before ever beginning to write.

The High School Senior Art Prize was given to me that year, to the surprise of everyone and dismay of all the school seniors (usually the school art prize was given to seniors- year 11 and 12s). Not that year. That year a little nuggety year 7 won it.

As a young 12 year old, I won the High School’s Senior Art Prize
Never was achieved prior to that day or since.
Art from the Heart 💓 always resonates with the hearts ♥️ of others

It wasn’t that I was the hardest worker or the most talented.

As I reflect, I believe I won because my art came from my heart 💓, rather than technical ability because I had not done as many hours at drawing as the seniors in the school by that time.

I simply taught myself to surrender to my inner muse and followed as freely and truthfully as I was capable of doing at a that time. I was not and did not allow myself to be influenced by a preconceived notion of what the piece of art will/would be.

I just played and did art in a state of child-like innocence then … like I have done since and still do, today.

Only I’m better at it.

Maybe life is just a sequence of layers of energy that reveals itself to us based on the level of consciousness we attain. Just like the many layers you see here in my line-art.

Open up to your inner creative power

You see, when you tap into the source of your immeasurable creativity, it will bring more joy and satisfaction to your everyday life.

You need to allow yourself to open up to your inner creative power. When you do, believe me… it’s like nothing you’ve ever felt. This increased awareness of the power that has formed the universe is felt … as you align and identify with the energy of creation itself.

This deeper source that IS THERE within YOU … will them inspire you to dream and to create.

I love 💓 love stories. Don’t you?

What if I said that I believe creativity is awakened by love … that it is a spiritual love story. A spiritual journey too.

I feel that This spirit of love 💕 has always moved me (since consciously deciding this back in year 7) and moves me today (& if you try it regularly) .. it will also do to you.

A Good physique artist understands the link between heart and mind … between thinking and doing … and the balance & symmetry communicated with the manipulation of light and shadows with extreme angles. He is a “David Copperfield of Muscle Illusion”. Just like a good photographer.

This Mysterious Thing

Ultimately, we are formed by a relationship with ourselves (not relationships with others as society tells us so, even though this is critical and relevant).

Ultimately, it is this relationship with ourselves that allows us to open up our hearts ♥️ to each other, to others … and express the beauty that we are.

You will … we all will … discover the creative path in our own unique ways.

I recall loving the study of the genius of D.H Lawrence in English studies in senior High school . He spoke of this “mysterious thing “ that we all hunger for … from life and so desire more creativity

He wrote –

“Men are not free when they are doing just what they like to do. They are free only when they are doing what the deeper self truly desires “. And to reach within to realise the nature of that self, takes some deep diving”

If GOD is in everything then, I Am God and you are God. We are all God. So, Having a relationship with yourself means having a relationship with God.

Work on improving this relationship. If this relationship improves, other relationships improve too.

Yours in iron, mind, heart 💓 & muscles 💪,

The old captain Viking Pirate 🏴‍☠️ muscled 💪monk 💭

I love Fine-line artwork.
I let my heart lead my mind … not the other way around
… to produce an image that is a fusion of chaotic & orderly lines … with control & feel

Continue to strengthen your relationship with YOU. The beauty within you will transmute into a creative expression if you give yourself the freedom to do so

Standard
a better life, anger, awareness, beauty, better choices, care empathy, chaos, choices, courage, desire, ego, Energy, game of life, gratitude, hope, Imagination, justice, life, long-term perspective, long-term strategy, patience, perseverance, perspective, respect, responsibility, risk, self discipline, self love, self-respect, time, trust, workout, you, your life

Inspiration is the Catalyst of Change

The Tree of Life is special. Grow with it.

Unsought is … most valuable

The Scientist and Philosopher FRANCIS BACON said –

“Write down the thoughts of the moment. Those that come unsought for are commonly the most valuable.’

INSPIRATION IS THE CATALYST … that lights the fire or sets the journey of creativity in our ships as we sail & navigate the Seas of Life.

Without it, every Pirate and genuine Voyager … knows there would be no work of art or scientific discovery. In fact, very little that is New and Creative and Innovative would come into the world. Imagine not having your i-phone? What world would that be like? (actually, a lot of you from my generation would know what that was like .. ha ha ).

Like a kiss, inspiration opens the heart in each of us to receive … it gives us the means of reaching the mystery beyond our worldly identities.

I find that surrendering to inspiration brings about a greatness that is the glory of existence (every Pirate and Viking knows this). We all suffer from lack of inspiration at some point or points in our lives, there is no avoiding it.

Question is, what do you do when you’re experiencing it? 

There is inner and outer beauty. Appreciate both.

The only requirement is that Love

Romantic poets believed that inspiration came to them because their soul was able to receive such visions. In modern psychology, inspiration is seen as an entirely internal process, like Sigmund Freud believed it came from your inner psyche, directly from the subconscious.

Inspiration to me, has nothing to do with the skill or capability of you, the individual and therefore, anyone and every single person can get inspired. We can find it anywhere – in a book, a speech, a movie … a person .. a symbol … a hope. 

To me, the only requirement is that of love. That for you to be inspired, you need to allow the flow (of inspiration) to come from the heart … your heart. It is a Power from Within, necessary for all creation and innovation, which is the way of the future.

It is energy, so you cannot either create nor destroy it .. just become a better conduit of energy .. of what I call ‘un-mind energy’. It is but a brief moment in time … where that un-mind energy flows through your heart … allowing you to transmute that energy … into creating something beautiful.

‘That moment’ is like what the great thinker, Khalil Gibran described   when –

 “the earth delights to feel your bare feet and the wind longs to play with your hair.”

There is courage within each person, There is inspiration available to all souls … just allow your courage to help it speak to your heart … to release that energy … that light … to light others who are in darkness

Inspiration helps light that catalyst

We’ve all faced many problems and challenges in our lives so far (and many of us are struggling with ones now) and … sometimes people, feel incapable of solving, realising and accepting their own limitations. But, it is in those ‘moments’ of challenges/problems/obstacles lay embedded in them, the hidden solutions.

Every situation and every individual stores a potential and strength that is yet to be discovered.

INSPIRATION helps light that catalyst to tap the source of power within … to face whatever obstacle we face. When our purpose is to give birth to our TRUE IDEAL SELF, inspiration allows us to see ourselves in a New way every time.

When you’re inspired, we glow on the outside from the light within and this radiance shines out from us .. and lights the way for others in the dark. Even the great RUMI explains how we can nurture the power of inspiration by transcending our perceived limitations (from whatever fear we are facing), he said –

” The sound of the bow provokes fear for the arrow wounds its mark. What is sense beyond the unseen is inspired by perception. Increase your necessity to increase your perception.”

Let inspiration be the catalyst to light your inner-world … to brighten up your external world and… those you come in contact with

Education

I love many genres of music and one of them is Raggae and I think Bob Marley was a genius. He sang about freedom and justice and was a great Leader and Thinker and Poet, saying –

“I have no education. I have inspiration. If I were educated, I would be a damn fool.”

But don’t confuse inspiration with motivation, they are not the same. Many make this mistake. There is a major difference and the difference is a “matter of heart’. Inspiration connects with the heart .. and motivation connects the mind and is often ego driven. The ego, may in the short-term give to you … but in the long term, will take ..and continually take from you until you don’t know what or who you are.

As Socrates said –

” I decided that it was not wisdom that enabled poets to write their poetry, but a kind of instinct or inspiration, such as you find in seers and prophets who deliver all their sublime messages without knowing in the least what they mean.”

Find the “Giant” within you … within each person … of which inspiration is the catalyst.

Separate inspiration from motivation

“So, what should we do then? How should we live?”, you may ask. 

Here’s the thing, I believe that , one of the ways to separate inspiration from motivation is to be aware that at every moment we have a choice about how to live. With increased awareness, we can observe how those choices affect us. Now, keep it simple … if we allow inspiration to be our guide, then each day can possibly welcome a new and exciting opportunity. When we feel the heart engaging and singing … with and in what is happening ‘in the moment’ to us, we know that we are connected with a hidden source of joy!

Individuals, groups, communities, states and countries all around the world is crying out for inspiration (and for some, for a very long time). Let’s pray for all those in need of inspiration… of more inspiration … to summon the courage to face their fears … to find the solution(s) that may lay within the obstacles/challenges they are facing right now. 

I tell my kids, there is no such thing as a problem/mistake,… just opportunities to find a solution(s). 

The world needs many things right now … but now, more than ever, it needs – more love … more care … more compassion and … more trust. Please play your part in making this world a better place by giving this to whoever interacts with you on a daily basis. 

Inspiration has the Power to Empower. Inspiration has the Power to Change for the Better …. ONE LIFE AT A TIME.

It is a choice. Don’t sit on the fence. Inspiration without ACTION becomes a wasted opportunity.

Embrace inspiration. Embrace Change. Embrace your Heart. It leads to the ultimate Freedom… but you must ACT on that inspiration.

We are all inspired by many things to … Live. Die. With Dignity.

Yours in iron, heart, mind & muscles, 

 

Paul

(some people call me – “The Old Cap’n Viking Pirate Muscled Monk”

Find the inspiration within you … to help motivate you to making a choice … the Right Choice … for LIfe… in your life.

Release the Hulk in you .. when appropriate
There is a time to be placid and do nothing … then, there is a time to act … and stand for something.

 

 

 

 

Standard
a better life, action, adaptation, awareness, balance, beauty, care empathy, caring, choices, compassion, Energy, eternity, examined life, game of life, Goals, hope, life, long-term perspective, love, muscle building, muscles, perspective, responsibility, self, self improvement, self love, strengths, symmetry, trust, you, your life

Care/Neglectful & how it relates to Building bigger muscles & relationships

Balance & symmetry brings you closer to harmony … closer to infinity


Balance & symmetry 

Here’s how weight training for muscles 💪 with balance @ symmetry as a goal can be likened to a solid caring relationship.

When you train with care, your sets are sound (theoretically, principally & logically), unambiguous & smooth.

I have always believed that the care you take with what you do (in & out of the gym) is a virtue of every great Bodybuilding champion & leader. This also applies to anyone who is passionate about something or someone. 

Do everything with care. Don’t hurt others & most importantly, don’t hurt YOU

Purpose ambiguous or uncertain 

In contrast, neglectful training is carelessly made: your sets are awkwardly executed; your choice of exercise is dodgy & your number of repetitions of each set is awry; your logic faulty or difficult to understand; your purpose ambiguous or uncertain.

This leads to countless unnecessary premature injuries. And in the relationship side, people get hurt and you get hurt too by saying and doing things with less care and compassion that they needed. 

I say, “unnecessary” because I have stayed INJURY-FREE since I began training with heavy weights in the gym.

“How?! You may wonder. Well, it is not because of ignorance. No, there are many key factors .. one is simply learning from all the greats that have come before me … learning from other people’s experiences and being humble enough to be more coachable.

The latter (neglectful training) is what I observe with the majority of trainees in the gym.

Learn to be a better builder.. to build your bridge from where you are to where you desire to be. It can only be done with care, trust & compassion. Three things that this world needs more of

That kind of care

The moral: take THAT kind of care, even though you’ll think you don’t have to (especially if you want that relationship with that special someone to last). And if you’re not handicapped, take extra care.

I’ve always believed that everyone should keep these two primary goals in mind when trying to build good quality muscles 💪

  1. control
  2. Feel

It takes courage 

It takes courage to be patient, to forego instant gratification for long-term benefit. It takes courage to do the Right Thing. It takes courage to do what the majority are not doing. It takes courage to Lead.

As a mentor told me –

You cannot be truthful if you are not courageous. You cannot be loving if you are not courageous. You cannot be trusting if you are not courageous. You cannot inquire into reality if you are not courageous. Hence courage comes first and everything else follows.”

Our ability to string a few sets of exercises together without difficulty may blind you to the many other ways of stringing them together …

BETTER.

Your relationships you value most can be better . You deserve better.

Try the “care philosophy “ next time If you’re not already doing it.

Get in touch with me in 3 months and let me know how it went for you.

Thank you

yours in iron, mind and muscles 💪,

Paul e 💝alentine

A mentor told me once – “no one cares how much you know until they know how much you care.
Me & Glenn. One ☝️ or the hundreds of members of my Family Gym I once owned & managed for 7 years. They came (& drove past up to 15 other gyms in some cases…  because I cared. I gave them “results with care” (my slogan)

Quality lean muscle that “flows” takes time & a goal of balance & symmetry

Standard
a better life, action, awareness, better choices, change management, consciousness, courage, Energy, examined life, game of life, leadership, life, long-term perspective, love, real man, responsibility, risk, self, self improvement, self love, self-image, strengths, success, trust, truth, Vitality, you, your life

Having “Common Sense” is weird but is a KEY to being a Leader

Have courage. common sense. ability to reason. Like ALL Great Leaders.

The New Style is yesterday’s ‘weird

The new style is yesterday’s weird … let me elaborate as I story-tell …

I played and excelled at many sports but chose the sport of Bodybuilding or Physique Artistry, just like the greatest Bodybuilder, Arnold Schwarzenegger. I thought he was weird (abnormal compared to the majority of people). People thought I was weird because of my sport choice Almost 30 years ago now. They thought that – “once-upon-a-time” but not anymore.

Everyone knows who the most famous bodybuilder of all time is – Governor, movie A-lister, Humanitarian and great-all-round human, Mr Arnold Schwarzennegger. Now, over 250,000+ people flock to the Arnold Sports, USA Festival every year and, this is all over the world., even one here in Melbourne, Australia.

We’ve been in a Fitness revolution and every “Tom, Dick & Harry” wants to be bodybuilder. It no longer is weird to go the the gym and lift Weights ‍♂ and train to look your best.

Funny how definitions of weird changes over time.

never forget this

Weird could be “insanity” or ‘vision’

Very religious and spiritual people could be considered “weird” by many too. Someone driven to achieve an IMpossible goal because he/she has a dream but no one else “sees” it , but them. Weird could be insanity or vision. For example, if an entrepreneur has an idea and …. Succeeds, people say he/she is a visionary, but if it doesn’t, they say the person was insane (& so weird).

Genuine Leaders/Great Leaders & Champions of industry & different areas of life fall into this category. They create & innovate … bring about or manifest into the physical reality.

They SEE “what CAN BE”, instead of just “what IS”. This could be considered wierd by some who can’t visualise or even try to simulate possibilities.

The list of what is “weird “ and what isn’t could go on forever. We can just agree to disagree, as it seems it is a matter of opinion anyway.

I think  whether you think  you’re weird or not, does not really matter. There will always be people who would disagree with you. What’s most important is that being “wierd” is a key part of being a Leader. Yes, almost all great Leaders share many common traits, one of which of being weird.

Weird or not, ALL Leaders need to have “common sense” and not get caught up on whether or not you or people think your weird.

The warrior of love 💓
It takes courage to be Leader, to have the Strength to take on more than you ever thought possible.
The most important Power of all.

Many people are scared of what other people would think of them.

Many people are scared of what other people would think of them, instead of ‘fear of failure‘ as many believe. I never have, thanks to my grandmother who raised me. She would ask me when I hesitated because “other people were watching” and say –

“Do they feed you?”

I would reply – “no”

“Do they clothe you?” She would ask

And I would say “no”

Then, she would say – “then don’t worry about it … now go Out there and put on a performance they won’t forget!”

And I would. I’ve had her voice in my head all my life. Has never failed me … I don’t suffer from “nerves” like many people do. Now, this could be considered weird.

Take a stand … a stand of what you believe… IN… and know you have support of the angels

Common sense isn’t ‘common’ anymore

Real Leaders simply have common sense . One of the main reasons I say this is that , as a human being – YOU, me & everyone … we can agree that the ONLY thing that we’ve got going for ourselves is –

  1. the ability to reason
  2. your common sense

What I mean is that if you don’t know a “dip of horse  sh%t “ from a “dip of vanilla ice-cream”, you’ll NEVER MAKE IT as a Leader.

Whether you’re weird or not. That is a cold but hard fact! It seems common sense isn’t common anymore.

People ask – “why?” … I /My curiosity continually askS “why not?”
Seek possibilities… always

YOU

The hardest thing to do is also the “weirdest “ thing to do: to just be “you. But, this could be the greatest thing you may ever accomplish in your life …

“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”

  • Ralph Waldo Emerson-

This, ultimately, takes courage. Do you have “what it takes?” To be weird. It brings you closer to love . Being truly “you” and not an imitation of someone else … may be weird , but that also means that you have tonnes of courage (unlike many, who speak it but don’t actually DO it).

But having courage is the beginning and foundation or everything you will and can achieve in life … that is work h achieving.

“You cannot be truthful if you are not courageous. You cannot be loving if you are not courageous. You cannot be trusting if you are not courageous. You cannot inquire into reality if you are not courageous. Hence courage comes first and everything else follows.”

  • Osho

So I say be courageous… be weird but ultimately, be YOU. However, that opens up another question – Do you know ‘YOU?”

I mean if Scientists agree that despite having come a long way with advances in Science & Technology and the world around us but still think ‘who we are (our minds), is a baffling mystery. Question remains: Who are you?

Cheers to being weird!! & Cheers from Sunny  Sydney, Australia

Best of Vitality to you tribe members.

Yours in iron, pockets of thought-energy & muscles ,

Paul e Valentine

**Personal Life & Lifestyle Doctor**

Valentine Vitality THINK TANK

ME.
In Tiger form.

Standard
a better life, accountability, awareness, Beliefs, children, choices, communication, dads, dads love, Energy, examined life, game of life, kids, parenting skills, patience, real man, relationships, responsibility, self improvement, you, your life

Notice me, Daddy!

Olivia and Zachary enjoying their time with Ruby.
Being a role model for my children is one of the most important responsibilities I will ever have in my life.
For the rest of my life.
Just like it is for every other dad out there.

A Poem: for All Fathers and Dads 

“Like all Fathers and Dads reading this, I am blessed in many ways,

One such way is having two very beautiful kids;

They are still growing and since their early days,

They know that they didn’t have to strongly bid.

to gain my attention or win my favour,

They know, they always have my attention.

When they do or say anything requiring my emotional labour;

“Notice me, Daddy!”

They know that I’m all theirs –

ALWAYS… there, like a Golfer’s Caddie;

All they have to do is to seek me out,

That is all it takes to grab a Father’s attention,

I’m as close as a joey is in her mother Kangaroo pouch;

That is all it takes to steal a loving Dad’s heart,

“Steal mine away!” I say.

For I will always be your Father, til’ death do us part,

Always be there for you, until that fateful day.”

 

My gift to you,

 

Kind regards,

Paul

 

Paul e Valentine

** Valentine Vitality **

My children striking their version of one of the seven compulsory poses in bodybuilding – the “Front-double biceps” pose.
… and strike!

Me and my children.
Children gives you a hint of eternity.
A true blessing to be graced with seeds.
Vv.

Standard
a better life, asking questions, authenticness, awareness, Beliefs, better choices, choices, consciousness, decisions, Energy, examined life, game of life, gratitude, greed, needs, servant, slave

Needs, or Greeds?

Do you have to satisfy every desire you think of?
I don’t think so
Need, or Greed?

Don’t be a fool, you’re better than that

We have been told that the Top 1 to 2 percent of the world’s Rich people (which includes Nations), control and own 96% of the earth’s resources. I sit back and go ‘wow!”

How did it come to this? Why was it allowed to continue to happen?

I find a clue when I read up on the evolution of science and scientific thought over the last 5 thousand years. One thing is certain: Big Business is intricately connected to Big Politics, to Big Sports & Gambling and to Big Religion. That is the Macro-Business Summary of this imbalance in ownership and resources.

This has been happening before and during Biblical times, for instance, The Bible states –

The rich rule over the poor, and the borrower is servant to the lender.”

You, me and most of the world’s 98% are in debt to someone or some thing (bank, lender, mafia, government etc). It is just a matter of degree to you and your life. Anyone who read that biblical statement knows there is utter truth in it. Anyone who has borrowed or been in bondage to debt knows the truth of this verse.

Very often, time and time again, people get in ‘head over heels’ over debt and the mis-management of the their debt:equity ratios.

Here’s what you should do:

Look around you, many loan ‘opportunities’ are popping up all over the place in this time of perceived increases of insecurities and fears. You have to be very diligent about this process of accepting loans in these times … and at any time, for that matter. There will be many perceived ‘opportunities’ to take loans but beware during uncertain times like these, especially when there is increased fears.

Firstly, truly understand your position and your ability to service your debs – short term and long-term. Don’t be fooled in to thinking ‘no repayment for 6 or 12 months’ will make the debt ‘go away’.

Don’t be a fool, you’re better than that. You know you’re only lying to yourself if you believe that.

These times are testing, yes, but it’s important to come to grips with and remind yourself of the distinction between a need and a want.

Find your inner-peace but don’t wait too long … or until you’re a skeleton
But, don’t kill yourself with debt

Need or want

My grandparents taught me a lot in my early youth. They raised me.

As I grew up in an extended family in a communal setting, everything had to be done that benefitted the whole. We didn’t have much but my grandmother had this amazing ability to cook a large pot of food to feed the whole family. She always had an “abundance’ mentality and this was reflected in the way she spoke, walked and thought and in everything she did.

Till today, I still do not understand how she managed to feed over ten people in the household every single day.

They taught me how to not only know the difference between a ‘need’ and a ‘want’ but to make decisions on material possessions using this. I have learned over the years that – knowing is one thing but ‘doing’ is a completely different ball-game. Someone can ‘know’ but would not necessarily ‘act’ on the idea. Throughout my years on this planet so far, I am very happy to say that, just like any habit, I am close to mastering my balance between a need or a want.

I don’t have one hundred percent success rate but over eighty percent success in the key things in the key areas in life.

What about you?

What is your percentage so far? Honestly.

Don’t let your ego overtake the Real YOU.
You don’t need to be caught up with ‘the Joneses”
You don’t need to live with ‘status anxiety’ just to exist.

Master-Servant Relationship

The reality is that whenever you have borrowed from another person, in it’s most simplest reality, it is a Master-Servant Relationship and you are a servant … to that person.

Before you take that debt/loan or whatever fancy name it is called … ask youself Are you happy to feel that way?

Don’t get me wrong, that Bible verse, does not prohibit debt, no … but it certainly makes you urr on the side of caution. So, from a Christian perspective, we could interpret it as saying that any person that uses debt for any purpose, at the very least, is NOT using Biblical wisdom. They (the borrowers), may in fact, be classed as –

“Fools”

Are you a fool? Didn’t think so. Debt is important to surviving in this life but the smart choices with regards to debt is key. Don’t over commit yourself. Don’t be ‘low-level, uneducated slave/servant’. Be a sophisticated and educated slave/servant’. There is a difference. Know this difference and then …

Apply this difference.

And that ‘difference’ is your ability to distinguish what it is that is truly a need and want. Thank you grandma.

Don’t be a slave and eternal slave to this Boss “debt.
That is not the best way to live your one and only life.

The UN-Believer is the same as the UN-Provider

What else does the Bible say about uncertainty and the balance between abundance and scarcity? I’m sure, being a strong Biblical Scholar, you could find many. Here’s one I found, 1 Timothy 5:8 says –

“If anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for his immediate family, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.”

The underlying Biblical principle relative to debt in this verse is that by taking on debt you may run the risk of not providing for your own. Because debt mortgages the future. This is where the negative effect of the ‘compound effect’ works against you. The interest upon interest upon interest on you debt locks up your future life.

It locks you up and prevents you for providing for those you love.

Therefore, this verse says that you have denied the faith and are worse than an UN-Believer. Obviously, this risk is very real and very great and … should be avoided.

Exactly.
That is exactly what many experience when they get more debt than they can manage.
They experience “Holy Shit!”

Abundance vs Scarcity

Yes, it is important to believe (in terms of keeping you less stressed), to believe in the ‘abundance mindset’ rather than the ‘scarcity mindset’ because it just helps you live a more positive life and draws more good to you than bad, if used in the right manner.

In the Bible, Luke 12:15 says –

“Watch out! Be on your guard against all kinds of greed; a man’s life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions.”

It is quite obvious what the verse is trying to say – be aware and cautious and be on your guard against every form of greed. This is not, however, a matter of abundance vs scarcity.

Debt makes it very easy to fund short-term greeds; yet in doing so, we may violate the Biblical principle set forth in this verse.

The question to ask is what my grandmother told me when I was in my early youth –

“Son, ask yourself, am I funding my NEEDS or my GREEDS?”

We all have one life.

Where we end up in life has a direct correlation to the quality of decisions we have made to that point. Don’t let greed overpower your needs. Learn to discern between the two.

Your decisions are fuelled by the thoughts you have and these are based on your values and principles and belief system you adopted in your life so far. As my grandfather used to tell me –

Be careful of your thoughts, they determine your actions; be careful of your actions, they determine your habits; be careful of your habits, they determine your character and be careful of your character, it determines your …destiny.”

As you can see, your decisions impact on your destiny in life. Learn to make good and better decisions.

All the very best in your decisions,

 

Best of Vitality to YOU,

Paul e Valentine

Vitality, Health & Lifestyle Coach/Entreprenuer

The Best of the Best.
Phil Waugh – retired ex-Australian Wallaby & Warrahs Captain willing to embrace knowledge.
Increasing his awareness towards being the BEST HE IMAGINES HE CAN BE, using my framework.
An A+ Student!

Standard
a better life, adaptation, attitude, authenticness, awareness, balance, beauty, better choices, butt, change management, choices, communication, consciousness, decisions, Energy, examined life, game of life, Goals, good posture, grace, gratitude, happiness, Imagination, long-term perspective, love, patience, perseverance, perspective, real man, relationships, responsibility, self love, self-respect, Team work, trust, Vitality, your life

Are you a “Butt” Man?

Find your inner-peace but don’t wait too long … or until you’re a skeleton

Forgotten Muscles

Just to let you know, first up … I am a Butt Man and also a Boobs Man too, in case you’re interpreting the subject heading from ‘that’ perspective. However, I am writing about a more important issue for Men, like you and others out there … which if, unattended to, can lead to some rather unwanted health issues down the track. Let me elaborate …

You see, I’ve always loved observing people, from when I was a kid. I love observing humans in all walks of life, doing all kinds of activities and apart from a growing problem of very bad posture, many people are losing their bums.

It has become, I believe, the forgotten muscles.

People, especially men over 40 are experiencing an ever-disappearing behind or as the French term calls it – derrie’re. Matter of fact, I believe people have weaker posterior chain muscles in general. What are the ‘posterior chain’ muscles?

They are basically, the muscles that behind you, from your head to your heels – everything connecting your joints together.

Men are at risk of leaving their behinds, behind. They’re losing their butts!

Many men past 40 don’t know this but if they looked at themselves in the mirror lately, it is plain to see that the body profile has changed, and not for the better. Where has this very important muscle group disappeared to? The bum is made up of the gluteus muscles  – the muscular masses posterior to the pelvis formed by the three gluteal muscles (glutes): gluteus maximus, gluteus medius, and gluteus minimus. These muscles are in each cheek.

It seems that these amazingly strong muscles have disappeared and replaced with fat. Very sad, indeed or the part that was once the butt has moved to the gut or belly for some but for many, the arse has just vanished. Does this happen for all men? Certainly not but I believe it is happening more frequently to men that have a desk-job, sitting for hours on end every day, hunched over their keyboard looking at computer screens with very bad posture.

Stand up from where you are and go look at your glutes/bum in the mirror. Feel them, tense those muscles, do they feel strong? Can you see them when you turn to your side. If you can’t, you got to do something about them ass cheeks.

Only if you’re an Butt-Man, like I am.

Progress shots of the ‘back double biceps’ pose prior to contest. Working your ‘back/posterior” muscles is key. It is a life-saving activity you can do for no one else but YOU.

Only one half

In my observations of Boyz to Men in the gym over the last 30 years, I can comfortably say that the upper body is the half of the body that they like to train. It’s as if the bottom half, the ‘other half’ does not exist. They look in the mirror and their eyes don’t seem to look at what’s below the waist, just like seeing only the ‘tip of the ice-berg’ when you see an ice-berg in the ocean.

Most men tend to put unwanted fat deposits in certain areas as they age. This is in the form of visceral fat around the mid-section and neck and chest area (“bitch tits”) and the butt or arse area. In this social media era, many men are trying to lose weight, fast and some are going about it the right way – building muscle with resistance training and combining this with balanced nutrition and cardiovascular exercises.

Problems in the arse tend to arise when they lose muscle in the bum/arse as they lose fat in that area too. Even those men who go to the gym regularly can lose bum muscle or glute muscle too. The latter is rather sad because of the rather foolish approach many men carry out their training.

The culprit: these men only focus weight training on their upper body, only seeing one half of the body. The other half (the lower half) does not exist to them. The loss of muscle in the arse/glute area is due to these men conveniently embrace dementia-related symptoms with regards to the existence of the bum.

To them, the arse does not exist.

Work your back muscles .. you may just build a cape as wide as Batman’s

Maximus and minimus is very strong

As mentioned earlier, the gluteal muscle group is made up of three gluteal muscles in each ass cheek forming a powerful muscular girdle that keeps the pelvis stable and moves the body forward. It is arguably the strongest muscle group in the body.

The glute muscles are not specifically activated and utilised by walking or running and exercises like planks and crunches don’t help either. The maximus and minimus is very strong and are engaged with exercises such as squats, lunges, hip extensions and bridging.

Single leg squats or leg presses and walking sideways helps but unless you’re a crab, it is quite pointless.

Abdominals & Thighs … for the audience. What you should work at is the back/posterior muscles which includes the butt

Exercises to boost your arse/butt size

One day in the past, sometime in the 7 year period I owned and ran my Family Boutique Gym, one of the male members yelled out from the other side of the gym saying –

“Paul, you’ve got the biggest arse I have ever seen on a man!” and joked –

“Paul and his bus” (meaning my backside).

To maintain and even build the buttock muscles, certain exercises must be technically correct. You must have patience and allow yourself to be coachable. You should focus on the functional value of performing these exercise for your overall health and strength benefit.

The aesthetic benefits should be a side-benefit not the main motivating factor (even though there are faster options available from cosmetic surgeons who suck fat out of the belly and re-inject it in to the buttocks – yuck!).

Forget that shit, speak to your Ass-Cheeks and work it like a Real Man+ by doing exercises with weights in the gym that builds these muscles up – squats, deadlifts and leg presses.

My Family of friends in my gym I owned and managed for 7 years.
All working towards being the ‘best the can be’

Emerging trend for Men

According to the American Society for Asesthetic Plastic Surgey, getting ‘butt surgery’ is an emerging trend for men. Really?! Apparently, men account for almost 10 percent of cosmetic buttocks procedures. Twenty years ago this figure was less than 2 percent.

There’s also a cheaper option available – buying padded bottom-enhancing underpants or trunks that provide a lift, like Calvin Klein’s “Body Boost Butt Trunk”, that has hidden support straps to boost the rear profile. So, men can have the appearance of a powerful behind, without doing the hard work to earn it and not having to pay thousands of dollars for surgery.

Never thought Men, Real Men … would stoop this low. But, it happens and is happening more frequently.

work your ‘back muscles’

A strong butt is a strong back and good posture

As you now know the glutes are vital to your movement and has certain sexual and aesthetic appeal. However, you may not know that these same muscles are crucial in protecting the back and lower limb joints from injury. They hold the pelvis steady and keep them aligned with the legs and the torso.

If the butt muscles aren’t strong enough they won’t do their job properly – to maintain erect posture for the upper torso and so the lower back muscles have to do extra work and this leads to chronic back pain which a lot of office workers suffer from.

This could also lead to hamstring problems as they have to work harder and overcompensate. Problems can and will also travel downwards to the knees and ankles. So, as you can see, apart from the aesthetic of a big strong butt, their role in having a strong back and good posture is key.

Back double biceps.
I had this pose covered … from top to bottom.
I won this division in the NSW Titles back in 2007.
work your ‘butt. work your back/posterior muscles

Credit Card Test

Here’s what I’d recommend to you if you feel you’ve been suffering from gluteal amnesia, go the gym and start doing the exercises that target the buttocks, namely – squats, leg presses and deadlifts. But, you’ve got to learn to improve your ‘mind-muscle’ connection and focus on squeezing your glutes at the top of the movement. Always be in control and feel the muscle.

The glutes have become the forgotten muscles because most strength-training routines do not isolate these key muscles.

Here’s a little strength test for the largest of these muscles – the gluteus maximus that you could do in the comfort and privacy of your home or office. Take out one of your credit cards from your wallet and place in between your butt cheeks. Comfortable? No, it isn’t but that is not the point.

Now, squeeze those ass cheeks tight, holding the card in place and then run across the room. If those glutes cannot hold the card in place, then, Huston, we’ve got a problem … a butt problem!

Honesty test: so, how did you go? Is the card still there in your butt?

A friend of mine getting a sun tan on my favourite beach here in Sydney, Australia.
A hot day it was. …

Don’t worry, be happy

I love that reggae song called “Don’t worry, be happy” that came out in the late 80s if I recall correctly. It is not the end of the world, if your credit card was left behind on the floor as you ran to the other side of the room.

If you have a butt problem, believe me, you’re not alone in this world. I believe most people, particularly, most Men actually have butt problems. You need to get them working well again and you can and … you will.

My son Zachary and I at a family member’s wedding. A lovely day.

Here’s my tip: get your lazy ass off the gym, ask for a more conventional assessment by a suitably experienced and qualified personal trainer and get cracking on your butt investment. Don’t worry, you’re not the only one who is lazy … humans generally are … we all, are, me included.

After all, aren’t you an butt/ Ass-Man?

I know I AM!

Cheers & Ahoy!

The old Cap’n Viking Pirate Evangelist Muscled Monk … & being an Ass-Man and loving it!

Leadership ability begins in the home … children learn character building in the home
Be the best character you can be … for YOU, first .. and then for your kids
my two children a number of years ago

Standard
a better life, action, adaptation, asking questions, attitude, authenticness, awareness, belief systems, Beliefs, better choices, breaking points, change, change management, choices, consciousness, courage, decisions, Energy, examined life, game of life, hope, love, man, mid-life crisis, patience, perseverance, perspective, recreate, responsibility, risk, self discipline, self love, self-image, self-respect, time, you, your life

Death of a Cubicle Worker

Bigger isn’t necessarily better but … it can smash things (like the Hulk)

Bigger isn’t necessarily better

I remember the last words my boss of almost three years say to me as I walked out of his office –

Paul, bigger isn’t necessarily better’.

I nodded at him, smiled and left. This happened a long time ago, back in 2003.

You see I had an offer to go work at one of the Top 2 Accounting & Business Advisory Firms in the world and I was leaving my role as a Senior Accountant of a 2nd-tier Accounting & Business Firm in Sydney, Australia (Top 20 in Australia).

It was exciting and even though my boss was happy for me, I could tell he was a little sad. I had handled his clients for almost three years and did a good job at it, working very hard. Heck, for about six months after I joined, my Manager upped and walked out and I was thrust in to an “acting Manager” role. I held the fort, so to speak for half a year while they looked for someone appropriately qualified and skilled.

He liked me. I was loyal and I was there when he needed me. This was reflected in my six-monthly salary review, I was handsomely compensated and was at the top of the salary range of my peers. “Not bad” I thought.

I could not foresee the future and being a candidate for the death of a cubicle worker.

Funny thing is that that piece of advice also applies to muscles and bodybuilding. The guy with the biggest muscles doesn’t necessarily win on stage in competition. That is because the guy with the most balanced & symmetrical physique with the right muscle: joint ratios and knowledge of the ‘art of posing’ is what builds a champion physique.

I’d understand that fully in my next phase of life, only a few years from where I was then …

 

Exactly.
No one can truly see the future but we can certainly extrapolate current patterns to help predict the future.

When being your Best isn’t good enough

I was hired at a newly-created level just below the “Senior” level I was at my old Firm. It was a blow to my ego, initially, as I felt that I was being demoted. I brushed that out of my mind and told myself that ‘it was only a title’.

Thing is, that initial thought bugged me right through my experience there and every other thing that bugged me just seemed much bigger than what it was. Hey, I was back at a Big Four! (My first Corporate work experience was at the largest of the Big 7 at that time – Arthur Andersen, just after graduation in the late 90s, where I spent over 2 years as a Risk Consultant).

It is now the Big Four.

Was nice to be back, or so I thought.

Let me just say that …I failed at my role. This is when I learned how being your best was not good enough.

I was going from a mid-tier to a Big Four and that was a ‘step up’ in the world, or so we believed. My first, heck, my first three months was nerve wrecking and admittedly, I found the place intimidating, cold and I was filled with fear but also a bit of excitement and loads of nervous energy.

But I had a bit of pride about it all.

I was sort of average at University. Many students had been far above me on the Dean’s list and graduated with honours and straight A’s. Not me. I had never hit any academic home-run except when I was in Primary and High School.

But that was a long time ago…. and besides, I was literally practising my social skills and building relationships and making connections in many sections of life. Skills like honing ‘small talk’ in various social situations, comfortably having conversations with people from all levels of the university and society- from the Chancellor, to having beers with Heads of Departments, to Gym Managers to gardeners. I spent a lot of that time mixing and socialising and finding out more about people as I ran a small business on the side too.

Besides there just so much to do besides study for straight As, and working on developing ‘me’ as a whole person and …. I had the energy and foresight to do that.

“What did my employer see in me? “ I used to ask myself.

They were looking for “well-rounded” individuals with experience along with brains… not just super-brains with no ‘people skills’. Ha! All that time running a business while studying and socialising wasn’t a waste after all. Apparently, many studies from major educational institutions indicate that the ability to connect with people is a key skill to have in life, a part of what is now commonly known as ‘Emotional Intelligence’.

One thing that immediately bugged me after getting that ‘newly-created’ title was I wasn’t getting much more than what I was getting at my old job.

I went from a Window Cubicle with great views to a ‘hot-desk’ and great work colleagues and a wonderful culture to something that was very different. A hot desk means that you don’t really work there and they don’t give you a permanent spot. You’re meant to be at your client’s premises, because if you are then, you’re charging your time to the client.

The firm makes it’s money that way, they had many perks. Employees loved that. I wasn’t phased.

The office was huge. An open-flat plan, comprising of a cubicle-walled jigsaw puzzle that felt like one of those boxes they make white mice run through to find the cheese.

Sometimes taking a bad photo of yourself can be very good for your own good. Just like sometimes, the greatest hurt teaches you the most.

Our Life-Controlling Mechanism

We can fill our minds with inspirational messages encouraging us to “Just do it!” or “Follow your heart!” so when we can’t do something or we recognize we aren’t good at something, we feel stuck. If we quit, that’s a problem (“Just do it! Don’t give up!”)

Sticking with it and quitting is a losing game, it is a lose-lose situation. No amount of positive affirmation can get you out of this abyss.

You feel like you’re unable to move at all.

Not able to think straight .. I felt like an imposter .. that I wasn’t good enough to be amongst the best of the best … not a good feeling to have at all.

I grinded my teeth as I slept, tossing and turning at night, and waking up with a feeling of dread in my stomach. I couldn’t handle that immense feeling of failure that kept rising and rising. Was it that I couldn’t do my job or I just lost all care about doing it? I’m not sure what happened first, my memory may have been a bit distorted.

I didn’t know where to turn.

I felt trapped.

You see, each of us have our own self-image, which kind of determines the kind of scope of person we are – it is our Life Controlling Mechanism. You see, we all have self-imposed limitations and we cannot outgrow these limits we place on ourselves.

We can only set new limits within which we must live.

Sometimes inspiration is not what you need, it is acceptance.

Acceptance so that you can move on and one day be in a position to say –

“I used to do that at one time in my life, but I no longer do”

A very powerful phrase to say. We all need to think we are making progress in life, no matter how small ‘that’ progress is. Saying ‘I used to do that?” gives you at least a perception that you’re kind of progressing in life.

Never give up.
In less than I year of leaving my cubicle in the Corporate Environment I was standing and competing against the best natural bodybuilders in the world at the World Natural Bodybuilding Championships in New York, USA.
Find your strengths .. know your strengths .. continuously build your strength on strengths.
Never give up

It’s not what you are that holds you back, it’s what you think you are not.

Especially if you’re hard on yourself like I am.

What doorways are you trying to squeeze yourself through right now where … you know what?

You really fit just fine. You are not the problems. It is the environment that you are working in, that is the problem. If you take a fish out of water and expect it to climb a tree, it will fail miserably.

Does the environment make us believe it’s all our fault? Yes, yes, definitely yes.

We live in a world where the screws are on tight. There’s a capitalistic shrink wrap making sure everything is fitter, happier, and more productive. So sometimes the stress on all of us builds too high.

There’s no room for error.

Now, that doesn’t mean my bosses at the Top Firm were bad, they absolutely weren’t. They had lofty expectations and needed me to help. Fast! The screws were tight on them, too.

No wonder it’s such a hard lesson to learn as we’re falling that we’re okay, we’re okay, we’re okay. And maybe it’s just not about us. It simply isn’t about us.

Well, nobody is telling us that. So we always think it’s always about us.

Maybe what we need is simply – a Fresh Start.

I did.

A few years later I did what I really loved to do and that was to coach people how to be their Best – I owned and managed my Family Gym for about seven years. That failure at that cubicle job had many benefits, it spurred me on to very intense self-reflections and an identification of personal strengths. So much so, that in less than a year of leaving the cubicle world, I was competing at my first of two World Natural Bodybuilding Championships, representing Australia.

Finally, this fish was in the ‘right environment’ and my Best was good enough… good enough to be one of the best in the world at my chosen activity (Top 5 in the world two years in a row, representing the country I love).

You see I’ve learned many things from that failed cubicle job experience and one of it is that it’s not what you are that holds you back, it’s what you think you are not.

I wonder what yours is?

I know one thing for certain … the future of work will see the death of many cubicle workers. It already has as technology has allowed many employees to work from a distance already. Be creative and consider strategies for your future and the future of work, Now.

Never forget: BELIEVE in YOU, first.

All the very best,

 

Cheers & Ahoy!

The old Cap’n Viking Pirate Evangelist Muscled Monk

Learning from the best at something, to be your best is the quickest way to get to where you’re going.
No one can teach you what they don’t know.

Standard
a better life, awareness, Beliefs, better choices, change management, choices, consciousness, decisions, examined life, game of life, Goals, habits, hope, Imagination, kids, leaders, leadership, life, long-term strategy, love, mind, mind-muscle connection, patience, perseverance, perspective, responsibility, self, self discipline, self improvement, self-image, self-respect, skills, taking action, truth, Vitality, you, your life

To DO NOTHING could be the best thing you could do for yourself.

The brain cannot multi-task, this is a myth.
Neuroscience shows that the brain can only TASK-SWITCH.
You CANNOT multi-task without mistakes.
Teach yourself to DO NOTHING … to SIT STILL. … to …
Just BE.

Sitting still is UN-Easy

My daughter and son are now almost eleven and nine respectively.

I have watched them grow in to enthusiastic and very curious individuals. They have the same blueprint but have very different personalities and appreciate their own uniqueness. Over the years, I have given them many challenges for their growth, in various forms – art, music, sport, mental agility, verbal wrestling etc.

When they were four and two respectively, I gave them a challenge to DO NOTHING … just to sit ‘still’. We first began with 20 seconds and kept increasing. Like any new habit, the first time was quite difficult for them, being kids .. but as time went on, they got better at it. It was the hardest thing they have had to do in my opinion and is one of the hardest things for adults to do too.

Sitting still is UN-Easy, indeed. Some cultures do this better than others and I believe many in the developed world can take a page out of the Fijian’s handbook. It is no fluke that they are the happiest people on the planet. They know when to work … and when to relax. They don’t mix the two.

Try it. How did you go?

Guess how good my children are at sitting still now? Yep, they can sit still for an hour with ease now, when they need to. Like all habits, it takes patience and practise.

People in a hurry struggle to find time for recovery, real recovery. Many look forward to their annual 4 week leave, but by then, it is too late, as you cannot escape your mind. You can only manage it better. Their minds have little time to meditate, to UN-Think, to just BE. Still. Their minds have little time to pray and their problems seem to get ‘blown out of proportion” and usually taken out of perspective.

In short, I believe people in our very fast-paced cities and societies have been showing clear signs of physiological and psychological disintegration because of many reasons. One key reason, as I see it is that we are living at a pace that is too fast for our bodies. It seems that people think that all other areas of life needs to be changed as fast as technology changes.

Nope, very bad extrapolation of ‘correlation’ if you asked me. This, I believe is the Essence of the Stress Problem in society, as this way of thinking feeds in to the ‘instant gratification’ mentality afflicting many in our modern-day societies.

Find your inner-peace but don’t wait too long … or until you’re a skeleton

ACTing to Create Change

It is difficult to get YOU and your mind to be in the Present moment, to have mindful connection with the present moment. Why is that? I wrote that one way to do so is to learn to “UN-Think”.

You see, from my experience, plugging back into the present moment and connecting with our surroundings does not need to be complicated.

Being in the present moment tends to prove most difficult when we are troubled with a major life problem, loss or trauma, and no one reading this and alive, can say that they haven’t experienced these challenges.

As we all know, problems have the habit of filling our minds and taking over our thoughts to the point where we can be emotionally and mentally absent from the people around us. This is why we all need to improve our skill at being still.

You see, I believe, to do nothing and be still is an under-rated, yet, KEY life skill, as hinted in the Bible –

“Be still and know that I am God.”    

  • Psalm 46:10

But many have forgotten how to do so because they are always ‘busy’. “How are you?” I would ask … to a response of – “busy!” . Really, I ask myself.

Like all new skills, practice makes a huge difference and with perseverance, the skill becomes easier to master.

Here are a few routines you could practise to help you get back to the present moment, as part of your acting to create change

  • Apply your senses
    1. Stop
    2. Be Still.
    3. Concentrate on trying to name 3 things you can –
      1. See
      2. Hear Feel or touch
  • Grounding YOU”
    1. Stop.
    2. Be Still.
    3. Push your feet into the ground (feel that force travel through your feet into your glutes into your lower back and up towards your neck)
    4. Consciously straighten your back.
    5. Chin up and shoulders back.

STOP and RELAX
After almost 30 years of training with weights in the gym, I have found that Breathing properly is one of the Key factors in achieving the results you desire. Apart from staying alive, breathing properly allows you to focus better and when you focus better, you have improved ‘mind-muscle’ connection, you become “ONE”.

When you have better mind-muscle connection, you feel and control the weight better and when this happens, you build quality muscle better. Breathing correctly increases your self-awareness and helps you avoid injuries in the gym (part of the reason I have stayed INJURY-FREE since I began weight training in the gym).

Stop and Relax

  1. Stop.
  2. Be still.
  3. Take a deep breath and count ‘one’
  4. Then breathe again ..
  5. And Count ‘Two’ in your head …
  6. Then breathe again ..
  7. And count “Three” in your head…
  8. And keep going to ten.

 

If you can focus on nothing else but the numbers and not let any other thought come in to your mind as you count one through to ten while focusing on breathing slowly and deeply, you would have gotten closer to mastering the ‘art of concentration’.

Try it. See how you feel.

Find that place where you can sit ‘still’ and ‘ do nothing’ … but just BE. For me, it is where the land meets and sea that meets the sky. I sit still and do nothing but listen and see and smell and feel. where do you go?

 Stress-Free Living

I have noticed that many expressions of spirituality have become linked to adrenalin arousal. I believe, can be very harmful. In recent times (over the last 10 years or so), many modern-day sages or ‘saints’ seem to find their peak spiritual experiences in exciting challenges or emotional catharsis.

Why?

[Many] seem to confuse adrenalin arousal with spiritual growth. If their bodies were stimulated, they then felt they were growing spiritually. If they were not stimulated, they felt nothing was happening.

Well, I’ve got news for you … it ISN’T!

The saddest thing about this kind of confusion is that it actually works against spiritual growth. People are confusing adrenalin arousal with spirituality. Many true saints of God as outlined in the Bible found their peak spiritual experiences in quietness and solitude.

Here’s the prescription for ‘stress-free living’:

“your beauty … should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet smile, which is of great worth in God’s sigh.”

  • 1 Peter 3:3-4

This truth, which was meant for wives in the original context is a wonderful secret to stress-free living.

Begin with YOU … the internal-you.

Then, worry about the external.

 

Cheers & Ahoy!

The old Cap’n Viking Pirate Evangelist Muscled Monk … & learning to DO NOTHING could be the best thing you could do for yourself.

Have no doubt.
Help yourself first.
God will meet you half way …
he ALWAYS does.
All you have to do is: BELIEVE.

Standard
a better life, adaptation, attitude, awareness, better choices, choices, dads, dads love, desire, dreams, Energy, examined life, game of life, Goals, gratitude, happiness, hope, life, long-term perspective, love, man, marriage, needs, patience, perspective, real man, reflection, relationships, respect, responsibility, risk, self, self improvement, self love, self-image, self-respect, strengths, success, successful marriage, time, truths, Vitality, wife, you, your life

11.5 KEY Life Lessons I’ve learned in my life so far …

Do you believe in Love at first sight?

ONE. GIVE people more than then they expect.

Go the extra mile. Do it with a smile.

Human nature (especially in the Western World), teaches us to “Take”. We are constantly taking, taking things in life, for granted and by doing this philosophy of taking, we are intentionally Taking from Themselves.

If you’re a Christian like I am, you will know that the Bible teaches that to receive, you have to GIVE. You can give, in many ways – financially, emotionally, intellectually, your time etc.

I believe, your greatest GIFT to others and the world is your Attitude. Having an Attitude of Gratitude’ (by giving Thanks), you connect yourself to the magic in the universe and ultimately receive everything you desire in life.

One must deliberately think and feel Gratitude, there is no other way to tap in to the abundance but first, you must give.

I like the point where the sun looks down where the land meets the sea meets the sky. My Golden Point. Do you have yours? Where?

TWO. Don’t believe everything you hear or read.

Reality is what you perceive it to be, not what others tell you it is. If you don’t think so, just watch a really good magician or illusionist change your reality right before your eyes.

Also, spend all you have and sleep all you want.

Continuously helping you become the best you can be … BEGIN help by helping yourself.
Then,
Reach out and touch someone … be the light for someone who can only see darkness.
Help them see ‘beauty’ .. see their truth.
Help them manage their insanity with sanity … their chaos with order.
Pray.

THREE. Marry a man/woman you love to talk to.

I’ve been very fortunate to have been with a woman who said she just wanted to keep talking to me from the very first time she met and hear my voice. I think that is one of the best compliments I have ever had.

I feel the same way about her and we have been together since we first laid eyes on each other twenty years ago.

As you get older, their conversation skills will be as important as any other.

Thank you, my darling wife and dear life friend, Cathy for the last twenty years of talking and conversing.

A lovely time out on the ski slopes.

FOUR. When you say, “I love you,’ MEAN it.

I’ve heard it and so may, have you. People who rattle off the phrase ‘I Love you’ but, you know they don’t really mean it as their actions to match the words.

From my experience, love is worth the risk.

It is quite simple, if you say it, mean it.

Don’t abuse that phrase.

To pursue your SHIT and never achieving it is far better than never having a go at your SHIT and living with regret forever.

FIVE. Live with each other for at least six months before you get married.

About eighteen years ago, my girlfriend at that time (my wife now), asked me to move in with her. After two weeks of deliberation, I called her up and said –

“why not, let’s just do it”

We were both a little scared. It was new territory for both of us. We agreed that we would give it a try for six months. If either of us or both didn’t like living with each other, we would call it quits and go separate ways.

I heard couples breaking up because they pressed the toothpaste from different ends. Apparently, the little mosquitoes irritate you more in life.

Almost twenty years later, we have beautiful memories with two beautiful children and a dog.

The six months was a key moment in our relationship.

Thank you, Cathy for agreeing with me to do this all those years ago.

Travelling the uncertain seas of life together.
Love is worth the risk.

SIX. Believe in love at first sight.

I know some people don’t believe in this and try to analyse their future love partners based on other logical reasoning like income, status, intelligence, looks, height etc

They’re all important, yes they are.

I believe they are not as important as listening to your intuition in choosing a partner. This usually involves illogical reasoning and matters of the heart, which is tied to your eyesight and seeing love before your eyes.

It is a beautiful thing.

I’m still with my wife from the first time I laid eyes on her in the Photocopying/Fax Room at our place of work, in the year 2000. We were Business Consultants working for a Top Advisory Firm in Sydney, Australia.

She gave me the best smile I had ever seen and I believe I saw her heart smile to me, through her eyes.

I fell in love, then and my love for her has grown every day since.

What do think YOU see in the mirror?

SEVEN. Don’t laugh at anyone’s dreams. People who don’t have dreams, don’t have much.

What are dreams?

Dreams tell dreamers what could be as opposed to what currently is. Dreams are essential to creativity and innovation and achieving goals.

What are goals?

They are ‘dreams with a deadline.’ Everything begins and ends in the mind, starting with your imagination/dreams. As a mentor once said –

If you can conceive it and believe it, you can achieve it.

I used to tell people that if I made that person I see in the mirror better than, last week, than last month, than last year … in ten years I will be on the World Stage, standing and competing against the best in the world.”

Within ten years, I stood on stage against the best natural bodybuilders at that time, representing Australia. A Big Dream, come true. I repeated the feat the following year for good measure. As a great mentor once said –

“If you think you can, you’re right … you CAN.”

Don’t ever laugh at another person’s dream, no matter how far-fetched it is.

My ten year dream. Achieved. Twice.
Believe in YOU. Have a Quality Plan and then Work that Quality Plan

EIGHT: Great love and great achievements involve great risk.

It is worth it, if you desire it so.

Life, is many things and one of them is – life is a big exercise in Risk Management.

Remember: No Risk, No nothing.

Wonderful insight in to the mind of a Great Leader

NINE. Smile when picking up the phone. The caller will hear it in your voice.

Smiles should be traded in, like the Stock Market.

Those who smile often and readily, should get credits of some sort from society. Smiling makes everything a little better, unless you’re the Joker and going up against Batman.

Everything is going to be alright.

Smile.

One of my many quirks – my Old Captain Viking Pirate persona
Smiling is a habit of mine. … a contagious habit I must add.

TEN. Disagree with people, if you must but don’t hate them.

It’s ok agree to disagree and still like someone.

In disagreements, fight fairly. No name calling and personal judgements. Leave judgemental comments to God or people who have a profession as a Judge.

Shit happens. Stand your ground. Don’t be afraid.

Exactly.

ELEVEN point (.) Five: Spend time alone. Learn to enjoy your own company.

I enjoy my own company.

Do you?

You can be alone, but you are not necessarily lonely. Many people cannot stand being alone with themselves. It can be the most difficult thing for some people to do, the thought of spending time with themselves, with their own minds, with their inner-thoughts is just not ‘cup-o-tea’.

Spending time alone can be beneficial in more ways than one. It doesn’t have to be a huge amount of time initially, you can simply start small and slow.

The important thing is to Start.

My time alone produces my version of magic.
My Fine-line drawing paper art.
The fusion of chaos & order … that point where I dance with peace.

This is a list of only 11.5 Key lessons from my life so far … ‘0.5″ because the list is not exhaustive.  Many other lessons you can choose to learn as you travel through life. The skill is in identifying the relevant ones with appropriate sufficiency.

All the very best in your choices,

 

Cheers & Ahoy!

The Old Cap’n Viking Pirate Evangelist Muscled Monk … & Life lessons/hacks (11.5 Key) so far …

The Old Cap’n Viking Pirate Evangelist Muscled Monk and his pirate dog – “Mr Fuzzy/Fussy Cuddles”

Standard