a better life, accountability, action, adaptation, art, asking questions, attitude, authenticness, awareness, balance, beauty, belief, Beliefs, better choices, care empathy, caring, change, change management, chaos, children, choices, christian, consciousness, courage, creation, creativity, creator, decisions, desire, dreams, Energy, eternity, evolution, examined life, fairness, faith, fundamentals, game of life, Goals, God, grace, gracefullness, habits, heaven, Heretic, hope, Imagination, Jesus, justice, Knowledge, leadership, life, love, real man, recreate, relationships, respect, saviour, self, self discipline, self improvement, self-respect, significance, success, symmetry, synergy, truths, wisdom, you, your life

I AM AN ARTIST.

“ I AM AN ARTIST 👨‍🎨.

For some of us, we learn best by going where we have to go and doing what we have to do.

I CREATE (Art), in a number of ways …

I express my love through many mediums …

I PLAY with –

⁃ words …. In poems, blogs & books

⁃ fine-lines with Black fine-nib pens on white paper

⁃ the human physique by playing with Dumbells, energy inputs, processes and imagination

⁃ Lifestyle variables to DESIGN TAILORED LIFE & LIFESTYLE SOLUTIONS for individuals

⁃ Consciousness to “see” what many do not in the current & future

First and foremost, I AM AN ARTIST 👨‍🎨…

Of LIFE.

I may need a different mix of chaos & order … a more challenging mix of comfort & discomfort … a varying mix of stability & flow compared to more “normal “ people.

People may find it weird, but …

That’s ok.

I see life as an very large experiment made up of many smaller experiments. I refer to these experiments as experiences.

And I Am … the Scientist at heart… with an artistic soul.

I practise the Art of Physique Artistry/sculpting. The Art of the building towards better BALANCE & SYMMETRY with the OPTIMAL FLOW of MUSCLES.

WHAT WORKS For ME.

I remind myself that I must experiment with WHAT WORKS FOR ME.

As an Artist 👨‍🎨, money does not validate my credibility.

As an Artist, my credibility lies WITH ME, GOD & My WORK. In other words, if I write a Blog … a poem … if I sketch ✍️ a fine-like picture of beautiful building architecture … then, I write or draw – whether it will sell or not.

I CREATE what WANTS to be CREATED.

I listen to my soul.

I AM A PERPETUAL CHILD.

Since my Artist is a child, the natural CHILD WITHIN… I try to make some compromises to its sense of timing.

Timing is important … a characteristic that is not given it’s fair due.

Many times I will write poorly… draw badly … sculpt awfully … perform poorly. I allow myself to do this … to get to the OTHER SIDE. The side that spurns creative thought …

In my experience, IMAGINATION & CREATIVITY is it’s OWN REWARD.

I have been and am, continually in awe of the wonders & daily little miracles in life … of Life, itself.

One of My jobs is to continue to be in awe of the wonders of life and retain my CURIOSITY… to ALWAYS DEEPEN my understanding and increase AWARENESS of the MYSTERY of LIFE.

I love photography Art, especially of Flowers 💐.

Sense of self Respect.

As an Artist, my sense of self respect comes from my belief that I am created in the image of God, my internal reflection and from DOING THE WORK.

What work?

My work …

One fine-line-sketch -at-a-time, one set of exercise at a time, one poem at-a-time, one blog-at-a-time … one dream at-a-time. Five years working on a lifestyle proto-type, 10 years working on an entrepreneurial adventure, a lifetime pursuing a dream that takes a lifetime.

As an Artist, making money is not what drives me. I do not need to be extremely wealthy & rich but I do need to be RICHLY SUPPORTED by those who love & BELIEVE in me.

My CURIOSITY NEEDS to be fueled for my intellectual, spiritual & philosophical needs. These needs as well as my insatiable physical & emotional needs have to be continually fed to continuously EVOLVE.

I must …

Never allow these needs to be stagnant, for this will show in my work. If will show In my life. It will show In my temperament. …

… In my aura, my vitality.. my life force.

It is very important that I keep moving …. As this allows me to CREATE.

I need to CREATE to express my love for life … of life . If I fail to create, I get moody.

Nobody likes a moody – me.

In order to CREATE I must stretch the boundaries … making new laws … encouraging novel ways of looking at things … and not necessarily following the existing laws and staying within the current boundaries.

First, I must BREAK ALL THE RULES.

As an Creative Artist, I need to continually FEED and NURTURE my ARTIST CHILD… for the more I nurture this INNER CHILD, the more ADULT i am able to appear.

Through the right plan, positive mental attitude, Brad applies principles of my program towards being a lot more who he already is (the BEST he can be)

There is a CONNECTION between SELF-NUTURE & SELF-RESPECT.

When I allow myself to be bullied (very seldom), and somewhat allow to be forced by other peoples’ need for me to conform … to be more normal or more nice, I lose myself.

Sometimes I do. I lose my – Self.

I allow myself to succumb to the whims of the ordinary man, to be ordinary like the ordinary. Something My inner fibre of being just does not agree with.

I sabotage my CHILD ARTIST.

For when I am not creating, I am not a very nice person to be around. I am certainly not “normal” or very nice – go myself or to others. Many say I am “weird”.

So be it.

In my experience, There is a connection between self-nurture and self-respect.

Be the best you can be for you, first, then by default, everyone gets the best of you. Vv.

Creativity is a SPIRITUAL JOURNEY.

Every time I create something from nothing, I feel the creativity is a spiritual journey. For me, doing the ART WORK is a SPIRITUAL PRACTISE.

To me, there is never a “finishing line” or point where I can say that “I have made it!”

It seems that when I feel I “got there” … “there” vanishes. Vanishes into thin air. Just like that . In sculpting the physique for example, I have been working towards the elusive holy grail of bodybuilding: balance & symmetry.

Haven’t found it for almost 30 years now.

Every time I create … I have a piritual journey.

I NEED to keep moving … like a Spiritual Shark 🦈… if I stop improving, I will sink to the bottom of the Ocean of life and …

Die.

MY WAY like LIFE’S WAY is not the “straight & narrow path” as the majority take … but one instead which is literally “my way”

MY WAY is a SPIRAL PATH… not the straight & narrow. My way is a spiral path because I AM an ARTIST, but more importantly, I am created in the image of God.

It is a simple and as complex as that.

As an artist, I am a traveller. In body and in spirit & imagination. I yield to my SPIRITUAL LEADING.

The Creator bestows on us the gift of creative thinking & doing. Our recognition & use of our gifts, given by God, is, in turn, our gift 💝 to God.

When you Accept this DEAL OF A LIFETIME… I believe it is the beginning of TRUE SELF-ACCEPTANCE.

Give thanks and praise the Lord.

Amen.

FIRST: MOVE INTO THE BODY, HEART ❤️ & SOUL.

To move into the body, heart & soul, one must first resolve to ACCEPT that one MUST MOVE OUT OF THE HEAD/MIND.

This is not easy.

Especially in a “busy” world with a lot of external & internal noise.

I make exercise a key part of my life because I am and have been seeking a form of MOVING or MOBILE MEDITATION. The execution of well-chosen exercises allows me to practise this … what I call – moving meditation.

This meditation experience puts me squarely IN THE MOMENT… in the NOW.

If I don’t respect the weight and/or don’t focus, I will get injured. I have not gotten injured lifting weights since I began almost 30 years ago.

My goal has always been to seek BALANCE & SYMMETRY in body… which translates to balance & symmetry in mind, heart & soul.

Like I said, earlier, many of us (like me), we DO learn by doing. Exercise, for example, is often the impetus that moves us … moves us from stagnation to inspiration… from seeing problems to opportunities for find solutions … from self-pity to self-respect & living with dignity.

One of the things we learn is that – I AM Stronger … WE ARE … STRONGER THAN WE THOUGHT. From my experience, we learn to have a different worldview… we learn to look at things with a new Perspective.

And a lot of times, this different perspective is the KEY to experiencing life a little differently … a little bit better …

With …

Added …

FUN.

Thank you

Yours in care, compassion & trust,

P.

I love fine-line pen 🖊 sketching. No pencil, no rubber. Black pen strokes. Can you spot the “mistakes?”
Standard
a better life, accountability, action, adaptation, art, asking questions, authenticness, awareness, balance, beauty, belief, Beliefs, better choices, boys, brain, breaking points, caring, Change Agent, change management, children, choices, christian, courage, dads, dads love, dating, daughters, desire, dreams, Energy, examined life, fairness, friends, game of life, Goals, God, gratitude, greed, happiness, heaven, honour, hope, Imagination, information, intimacy, intimacy awards, Jesus, kids, leadership, life, listening, long-term perspective, love, male, man, marriage, muscle building, muscles, opportunity, parenting, parenting skills, perspective, self, self discipline, self improvement, self love, self-image, symmetry, synergy, taking action, Team that works, Team work, Teams, time, trust, truth, Vitality, wife, wisdom, you, your life

MARRIAGE: The ULTIMATE TEAMWORK.

The 💝alentine tribe (minus our dog 🐶 – Mr Fuzzy/Fussy cuddles

Marriage is Teamwork.

No matter what a husband or wife happens to be or do, MARRIAGE IS TEAMWORK.

From my experience of being married for almost twenty years now and also from learning from other peoples’ experiences, marriage is a great example of ULTIMATE TEAMWORK.

I would go further to say that, given the high rates of divorce, marriages that last are not just because of teamwork but they have teamwork because they are a TEAM THAT WORKS.

Marriage is not about the hope of WORKING AS A TEAM, it is about two people WHO COME TOGETHER… & FIT … like 6 fits into 9, to make “69”.

Family.

God is an Amazing God.

God is an amazing God.

God gives many things.

God does not give individual gifts 🎁 to frustrate a marriage. No. God gives us unique gifts to ENHANCE the marriage. God does not lead two people into a marriage to see “sparks fly”, pulling a husband & wife in opposite directions.

No… God, leads them into marriage to blend and maximise their strengths, their usefulness.

Whenever this happens in my relationship with my wife, I pray to God for his help…. To give me the strength, courage & wisdom to make good decisions.

This is where our faith in God helps us during turbulent times in the marriage. There are many forces (internal and external) that work hard to tear a marriage apart.

If you believe in your marriage & what it represents is important to you, ask for God’s guidance and work hard to keep your marriage .

My beautiful wife of almost 20 years now. My love for this human being keeps increasing every single day.

The most difficult Act of Art of all.

As I see it, much of the problems & tension that occur in marriages comes from the INABILITY to BALANCE the ACT of GIVING to your spouse /other while retaining a SENSE OF SELF.

Mastering this balance, i believe is the most difficult ACT OF ART of ALL in life. I am still trying to master this after almost 2 decades.

In other words, the tension comes from grasping or holding onto what we consider our INDIVIDUALITY. I believe no matter what our gifts, talents or personalities… when they are given To god.

With strong belief in God, he will work & blend it all out and provide balance, because that is just what God will do.

No other team that you are a part of in life – business, sport, religion, politics etc … will ever be as IMPORTANT or benefit & challenge you like a successful marriage.

It takes WORK… a lot of real hard work. It is the complete & ULTIMATE example of TEAMWORK in life.

With God (part of the team, too).

Here’s a few questions for you:

1. Has there been a time when you put one of your individual goals “on hold “ so your spouse could pursue a dream?

2. Was the eventual outcome positive for you?

Until next time …

Yours in care, compassion & trust,

P.

Here we are … my beautiful wife and I. at a dinner party.
Loving & love in the Family provides key input for Balance.
Standard
a better life, accountability, action, adaptation, asking questions, attitude, authenticness, awareness, beauty, belief, belief systems, better choices, brain, breaking points, caring, change, Change Agent, change management, chaos, choices, communication, compassion, courage, creator, dads love, death, decisions, desire, Energy, eternity, evolution, examined life, faith, forgiveness, friends, fundamentals, game of life, genuineness, Goals, God, habits, happiness, hope, Imagination, kids, Knowledge, leaders, leadership, life, listening, long-term perspective, love, muscles, needs, parenthood, patience, perseverance, perspective, real man, relationships, respect, responsibility, risk, self discipline, self improvement, self love, self-image, self-respect, Strength training, success, time, trust, truth, weird, wisdom, you, your life

The importance of the choice of LANGUAGE in having a HEALTHY SELF-EXPECTANCY.

I AM. I an Entrepreneur of IMAGINATION. Through Mastery of Self, I am able to be an Agent of Creative Destruction to allow the release of new ideas … new thinking … and a new Meaning. Meaning is the NEW MONEY.

Coaching conversations..

Over the years I have listened to many individuals. Listened to their stories.

Over the years I think I have had in excess of twenty thousand conversations with people of all ages. From teens to ninety-year olds.

Over the years I have had many coaching conversations. In these coaching conversations, I have helped increase individuals awareness of how their perception of events in their lives either propel them forward or hold them back.

I have listened to others and the way in which the stories they tell ourselves have the power to hold us back or propel us forward.

As an example …

The bottom line is that I wouldn’t be the person I am today if my hearing hadn’t been terrible when I was young. Neither would you.

This is why taking the time to properly frame our narratives and the stories we tell ourselves about ourselves can be so critical.

Keep your dreams alive . Snd if you’re going to dream … Dream BIG. You serve no one by being and thinking small. Think BIG!

Re-frame in away to move forward ..

Self-pity for being dealt a bad hand is easy.

Self-awareness is what brings with it empowerment and insight.

This, important first step is sometimes hard.

The first turns your past into an anchor, while the second turns it into the wind that fills your sails and keeps you moving forward.

Is there some piece of your story, personal or professional, that you’ve been able to reframe in a way that moves you forward, instead of holding you back?

Wonderful question for all to ponder. I’m one of the most self-aware person you will ever meet, but that is nothing new to me as I have been this way since I was a kid (from the adults who knew me in my youth).

Everything happens for a reason. Success is not an accident. It is based on the Aristotelian Principle of CAUSALITY. Today, we call it – “the Law of CAUSE & EFFECT.”

Cowboy 🤠 House.

Here’s one I’d like to share – I was raised by my grandparents as my biological Dad died when I was 4 years old, trying to save a person from downing … and was overpowered by the victim and drowning with that person). My biological mother was only 16 and had a choice to have an abortion but I thank her and God that she didn’t.

Her decision to give me life has allowed me to not only live but to do what I do – predominantly, helped people, help themselves building their bridges from where they are to where they desire to be over the last 3 decades.

Anyways, I grew up in a large extended family – grandparents, grand uncles and aunties, uncles, aunties, cousins and siblings and … visitors and extended family visiting.

My home was always full and was always noisy. Our neighbours used to call our home – the “Cowboy House”.

We didn’t have much of anything – food (there were no less than 10 people to feed every single day … and I do not know how my grandparents managed to do this), didn’t have much material possessions (my grandmother used to sew my school uniforms) … but the home certainly had a lot of love.

There was a lot of storytelling and sitting around talking almost every night. It was just part of the home … part of the culture.

Because there was so much noise, most kids would not be able to concentrate/focus. But, I told myself way back in early Primary School that I will teach myself to study/do school work/read in … noise.

My teachers couldn’t understand how a kid (me) could get Top Academic Results every year.

Most kids/people need peace and quiet to FOCUS, so we are told. “How does Paul do it?” I would over hear some teachers say. In my adult life, I have continued to learn/read/focus in any environment, no matter how noisy or ridiculous is.

The only photo I have as a baby with my biological mum. One of my 3 Mums in my life.

Focus on what you can control

I remember my grandfather telling me many things (he was a very wise man) … saying something to the effect –

“Paul, focus on what you can control … and do the best with what you’ve got … don’t be part of the problem, always be part of the solution”.

I’ve always applied that in my life, not focusing on insufficient resources and constraints .,. But on HOW I can do better with what I have. That philosophy along with many others, has helped me create the life I’ve always imagined and realise short-term and long-term goals.

Growing up in an family environment that had very limited resources (except for love … the home was always infused with LOVE), has allowed me to almost always have an overall attitude of personal optimism and enthusiasm.

I completely understand the psychosomatic relationship – psyche and soma – mind and body … better than most (hence sculpting a Physique worthy of representing Australia at 2 x World Natural Physique Championships and placing in the Top 5 in consecutive years).

I am fully aware of how the body is the physical manifestation of the mind or in other words, the body expresses what the mind is concerned with. I’m a strong believer that life is many things … and one of which is that life is a self-fulfilling prophecy…. That you usually get what you expect.

My ‘tough’ upbringing has allowed me to develop a healthy self-expectancy and eliminated all forms of excuse from my vocabulary as … I expect to win, almost all the time. I have no doubt the so-called ‘luck’ is the intersection of preparation and awareness.

Leadership ability begins in the home … children learn character building in the home Be the best character you can be … for YOU, first .. and then for your kids my two children a number of years ago

Life … a very real game but not a gamble.

I look at life as a very real game .. but not a gamble.

Part of what I have done over the last 3 decades is help people, help themselves build their bridges. I have learned and taught many things. It seems that every individual tends to receive what he or she expects in the long run.

From my experience and deducing from other people’s experiences in my life so far … it would appear that you may or may not get what is coming to you, or you may or may not get what you deserve – BUT YOU WILL nearly always get what you expect.

As someone who has mastered the art of body re-engineering (building muscle and reducing body fat to < 4%), believe me when I say, there is an intricately close connection between your mind and body … a negative thought can cause your ‘look’ (that you get judged on) to go from excellent (Top 5 and finalist) to awful.

I’ve learned and mastered much of the ‘mind-body-heart-soul’ interface connections and one important one is this – mental obsessions have physical manifestations. Basically, you BECOME WHAT YOU FEAR – you get what you expect – you are that which you expect to be!

Here’s the thing – since all individuals are responsible for their own actions and cause their own effects, optimism then, is a choice.

Choose well, my adult friends.

Balance & symmetry brings you closer to harmony … to beauty …closer to infinity. Just like mathematics does

Optimism, Enthusiasm, Faith & Hope.

What is needed is : continual fueling of – OPTIMISM, ENTHUSIASM, FAITH & HOPE.

Each is a synonym for – having a HEALTHY SELF-EXPECTANCY.

So, my question to you (if you’ve made it this far) is –

1. Do you have a healthy self-expectancy about things in your life?

2. Do you expect the best for you – in life and as a way of life?

3. Do you look at problems/constraints as opportunities?

With regards to question 3 above, try this little exercise and let me know your answers –

Make a list of your KEY problems/constraints –

> the ones that block your professional and personal fulfillment.

> Next, write a one-or-two sentence definition of each problem/constraint.

Now, rewrite the definition, only this time view it as an opportunity or exercise to challenge your creativity and ingenuity (some refer to it as ‘re-framing’).

Here’s a tip: view the solution as you would if you were advising one of your best friends.

So, where does your thoughts stand in relation to your Self-Expectancy now?

Write in and tell me all about it.

Thank you

Yours in care, compassion & trust,

Paul

A fridge magnet 🧲 I bought almost 20 years ago. Practise this.

Standard
a better life, action, adaptation, ageing, anger, art, asking questions, attitude, authenticness, awareness, balance, beauty, belief systems, Beliefs, better choices, breaking points, caring, change, change management, chaos, choices, communication, consciousness, courage, decisions, eating, ego, Energy, examined life, fairness, game of life, genuineness, Goals, habit, habits, honour, hope, Imagination, intimacy, Knowledge, leadership, life, long-term perspective, long-term strategy, love, no, patience, perseverance, respect, risk, self, self discipline, self improvement, self-image, self-respect, spirit, spirituality, suicide, symmetry, Team that works, time, trust, truth, wisdom, you, your life

DO YOU KNOW?

Believe. Embrace Creative Destruction. You never know what you’ll discover.

Here’s a little poem wrote (unedited) … I write as I think 💭… here we go –

Do you know?

That ..

To know is to not know?

That

To know but not know that you know

Is ..

akin to one who sleeps all day and so does not know

But …

To not know and not know that you not know

Well …

That is as good as one who is dumb-shit, you know!

And …

The last standing, lone warrior

The last one ☝️ …

The last one ☝️ we all need to stand for

And follow

Now.

That is the one that knows

The one ☝️ that “sees” what others do not see

The one ☝️

The last one standing

Knows that he knows

That lifts all spirits of those who believe to and fro

To be cheered for again and again

Because

He is one who cheers for all

And stands for all

Not because it is his right to do so

No

Because it is the right thing to do

You know…

Again and again

For

He is one who knows that he knows

In a sea of ones who think they know

And

do not know that they do not know

For

They think 💭 they see and say the right words to pretend that they see

But to no avail

Because

Truth always shines through

Always

Like the sun ☀️ will rise and set

You should follow the one because that is your best bet

To find your truth

Your beauty

What do you think 🤔?

Do you think 🤔 you know?

Which one are you?

I don’t know

Do you know?”

– GURU Paul 💝alentine –

My gift 💝 to you, fellow Insta tribe-within-a-tribe -within – a….

So… there you have it … a few thoughts from me … what say you?

Have no doubt. Help yourself first. You are more than just YOU… God will meet you half way … he ALWAYS does. All you ahve to do is: BELIEVE.
Standard
action, Beliefs, breaking points, choices, Energy, love, respect, self-image, success, truth, you

What does IT all mean ?

What’s on my mind?

Here is one ☝️ loooong thought 💭, posing questions –

I love this quote. Increasing your awareness is parameters to having clarity and success in your life. SEARCH. Become the BEST ‘searcher’ you can be. One day .. you may find ALL the answers you’re seeking for YOUR questions to give ‘meaning’ to your life. A wonderful book says – “Seek and ye shall find; Ask and ye shall receive.” True.

What does IT all mean… ?


Me, you, everyone else … everyday?
The Everyday.
What does IT all mean?
The empty words .. the useless thoughts … the lies we tell ourselves.. the lies we tell others … the ineffective actions.. the roads, the cars, the buildings, the bright lights … everyday …
The Everyday.
The thing we call and hang on to called …
Life.
The Life…
… we thought we had … the life we now live … the life we thought we would have…
The Life …
we would like to Create.
What does it all mean?
When does Life begin?
In the womb ?
… at conception?
Why?
When does laughter really begin?
In the womb?
At conception?
Why?
Life …
When does life end?
When does laughter end?
Does life end when laughter ends … or is it the other way round?
Does it matter?
Does IT begin with the rise of the sun ☀️.. everyday?
Does IT end with the setting of the sun 🌞.. everyday?
Is the Sun our true measure of time?
Is the sun our pendulum of …
Life?
What does IT all mean?
Where does our “time” go?
Why do we think being “busy“ is important… is right?
What about what’s left?
Who gets what’s left?
Of time … of
Life.
Why should there be a “waste” of time, when you, me, no one … can control time?
Who makes that judgement?
Is it better to fill our time with laughter?
Why? How so?
What do you believe?
Do you believe… that you’re the INFINITE?
Why?
Why not?
Do you believe you’re the culmination of each and each & every improbable moment that led to your existence?
And what about the SCARS you carry?
Do you wear them with pride? With honour?
Like badges you’ve collected along your path … your way?
For ALL to see?
Why?
Why not?
What are you hiding? Who are you hiding it from?
Does it IT really matter?
You hesitate?
Don’t!
Don’t even allow any of your future precious moments be taken up by “looking down on yourself “
There are enough people in the world who would gladly do this – “put you down … “
So, don’t do it to yourself.
It’s not worth your …
Life ..
That is THE INFINITE.
YOU are … The INFINITE.
So…
What does IT all mean… anyway?
What abyss of time does IT fill?
IT …
The Life…
“What does IT all mean?”
I curiously ask…
Anyone? “

– GURU Paul –

So, there you go … a slice of my thoughts 💭 –

💝alentine 💝itality 💝itamins…. For life.

Stay strong. Harness your courage.

Yours in iron, muscles 💪 & 💝itality,
P.

Try … to be wise. Success is the result of being just a little bit Wiser, not necessarily, intelligent, compounded over time. How wise are you?

Standard
a better life, action, adaptation, asking questions, attitude, awareness, beauty, belief systems, Beliefs, better choices, breaking points, change, change management, choices, communication, compassion, consciousness, courage, decisions, desire, dreams, ego, Energy, examined life, fairness, game of life, Goals, God, gratitude, hope, Imagination, Knowledge, Leader, leadership, life, long-term perspective, love, mind, muscles, needs, patience, real man, recreate, reflection, relationships, risk, self, self discipline, self improvement, self-image, self-respect, significance, spiritual balance sheet, success, time, trust, truth, truths, wisdom, you, your life

2.5 Lessons I’ve learned in my life so far …

Here are a few more questions: 1) do you like the colour red? On doors? 2) Do you like doors? 3) Is a question the “door to what lies beyond?”

1.0: Great love and great achievements involve great risk.

It is worth it, if you desire it so.

Life, is many things and one of them is – life is a big exercise in Risk Management.

Remember: No Risk, No nothing.

2.0Don’t laugh at anyone’s dreams. People who don’t have dreams, don’t have much.

What are dreams?

Dreams tell dreamers what could be as opposed to what currently is. Dreams are essential to creativity and innovation and achieving goals.

They are ‘dreams with a deadline.’ Everything begins and ends in the mind, starting with your imagination/dreams. As a mentor once said –

What are goals?

If you can conceive it and believe it, you can achieve it.’

I used to tell people that if I made that person I see in the mirror better than, last week, than last month, than last year … in ten years I will be on the World Stage, standing and competing against the best in the world.”

Within ten years, I stood on stage against the best natural bodybuilders at that time, representing Australia. A Big Dream, come true. I repeated the feat the following year for good measure. As a great mentor once said –

If you think you can, you’re right … you CAN.”

Don’t ever laugh at another person’s dream, no matter how far-fetched it is.

Does the shape of the door affect what is inside? Why does colour matter? Why do we need doors?

2.5 Disagree with people, if you must but don’t hate them.

It’s ok agree to disagree and still like someone.

In disagreements, fight fairly. No name calling and personal judgements. Leave judgemental comments to God or people who have a profession as a Judge.

Shit happens. Stand your ground. Don’t be afraid.

So, there you go… 2.5 lessons. “0.5” as the list is far from exhaustive. I’m sure your can add many more to it from your observations of life so far.

Until next time, take good care of your lovely self

Yours in care, compassion & trust,

Paul.

A yellow door maybe? Perhaps you like the colour yellow. What is your colour blind?
Standard
a better life, accountability, action, adaptation, ageing, attitude, authenticness, awareness, balance, beauty, belief, belief systems, better choices, breaking points, care empathy, caring, change management, children, choices, christian, communication, compassion, consciousness, courage, dads, dads love, daughters, decisions, Energy, examined life, fairness, father, game of life, Goals, habits, happiness, hope, Imagination, intimacy, Knowledge, leaders, leadership, life, long-term perspective, long-term strategy, love, mind, needs, opportunity, parenthood, parenting, parenting skills, perseverance, perspective, real man, reflection, relationships, responsibility, risk, saviour, self, self discipline, self improvement, self-image, self-respect, significance, strengths, success, successful marriage, symmetry, Team that works, Team work, trust, truth, wife, wisdom, you, your life

History, Family & Storytelling … & Torch Bearing.

With my gritty Viking Pirate 🏴‍☠️ Intelligent, caring & compassionate daughter, Olivia. She has heard me say many stories … over and over again.

There is Power💥 in Storytelling.

I’ve always loved storytelling.

I remember sitting with adults when I was a kid, Listening to their stories. They would say –

“Paul, why don’t you go and play with your cousins & friends outside”

I would reply –

No, there will be time to play with them later”

I’ve listened to hundreds of other people’s stories when I owned & managed my Family Gym for 7 years.

I love 💕 telling stories.

I believe there is power in storytelling.

My wife and kids. I Storytell until they get fed up… then I know, they know.

It begins in the home.

It begins in the Home…. Practising the art of Storytelling, that is.

Home is where the foundation of storytelling starts. I recall listening to my dad & his close friend’s tell stories around the Kava bowl. In the home, I got a strong 💪 foundation… Of a past that lends my existence a place, a sense of belonging, a historical context.

Home is where stories get passed on for generations. I have continued with this 💝alentine tradition. My two kids can retell the stories I tell .. because they have heard them countless times. And as my daughter says –

Dad, it keeps changing all the time”

And I say –

Aaaahhh… yes, my dear … that is where facts and imagination fuse in the optimum place”

Home is where I was told that I am built like & physically intelligent like my grandfather, Ben Valentine. A powerful & skilful National heavyweight boxing champion, going undefeated for 3 years in his prime.

Home is where I heard stories of my quirkiness from early age & my creative & innovative nature in my early youth. I heard stories of my country of birth through the filter of my own genealogy.

Struggles, family migrations, family triumphs, as well as ancestral successes & failures were taught to me through the history of my 💝alentine Family.

In my Home now, it is a place where I build my own legacy: through my love 😍 for history & storytelling, I have shared & will share more stories I was told in my youth with my children.

Always, adding my generation’s story to this 💝alentine Novel in progress. I’ve always believed the REAL histories of families aren’t the records of births, deaths & marriages. No, to me …

… they are the stories told after dinner, while having chocolate or dessert. So full and satisfied.

For i have learned many things so far, and one important one is the importance of LEGACY.

Legacy is fueled by US… in our family. It is fueled by ME. And all this evolves from our history… our family stories passed down …

As it is …

Our IDENTITY. Our ROOTS.

Balance & symmetry brings you closer to harmony … to beauty …closer to infinity. Just like mathematics does

Tell it to your children…

I found a passage from the Bible:

“Tell it to your children,

And let your children tell it to

Their children,

And their children to the next

Generation.”

– Joel 1:3, NIV

I tell my kids that one day they will bear the 💝alentine torch 🔦. They will continue to write their chapters if their lives through their storytelling.

Knowing that they have a very strong identity and they will continue to shine the torch 🔦 and build on the legacy that they inherited…

Through the strong foundation of the 💝alentine Family history through storytelling.

I am still the current Torch Bearer of the 💝alentine Family and I make a toast to all future Torch Bearers of my family and all families …

Carry the Torch with pride & Live & Die with dignity.

I love 💕 you, ALWAYS.

Yours in care, compassion & trust,

– Paul e 💝alentine –

Me.
Standard
a better life, ageing, anger, asking questions, attitude, awareness, beauty, better choices, boys, children, choices, courage, dads, dads love, dreams, examined life, father, friends, game of life, Goals, gratitude, happiness, hope, hulk, Imagination, kids, Leader, life, long-term perspective, love, male, man, needs, parenthood, parenting, parenting skills, patience, perseverance, real man, relationships, respect, self discipline, self love, son, strengths, success, taking action, Team that works, truths, Vitality, you, your life

My son turned 10, today.

10!

I sit back and go … “wow!’

Where has time gone? Ten years went by … .like a blink of an eye. Memories… that is all we have … shared memories.

We have many.

The young man and I. Cruising.

He knows he will always have a home.

He has spent his first ten years of his life, with me, his mother and his sister. Spent it in our home .. which is HIS HOME. 

I like to think that his home is a place of celebration, a continuous celebration of Life. His home is the place where he can let down his hair and just be, himself. His home is where living happens and laughter rocks the walls. 

I’d like to think that his home is the place where he learns to play, to have fun, to relax, to love and … to pray. Each day in our household is a celebration. Everyday, our Family prayers allows us to reflect on our life so far … with GRATITUDE.

Our home is A celebration of Life.

There is an abundance of laughter in his home. So loud that it carries all the way to the streets and neighbours.

Enjoying Kayaking together in Sydney’s beautiful seas

His home is where Real Living, takes place.

He learns how to work, how to play, how to eat, how to ride in cars together, how to attend Taekwondo lessons, how to play music in bands virtually, how to watch youtubes and videos, how to host friends, how to take care of his self, how To be a better brother, how to be the loving son that he is, how to develop our own private family jokes (usually they love “roasting’ me).

In our home .. his home, we try not to take life too seriously. In our home … a home of celebration we thrive in conversation and accept that humour and laughter is essential elements to our Family cohesion.

Our home … his home … vibrates to us and to everyone around us that … 

“This is what life is all about. In a nutshell, life is what happens in our home … it is where he is celebrated.”

He loves creating stuff. With all kinds of tools.

Home is where … 

My son … has his Nintendo game, his soccer and rugby balls, his books, his swords, his toy guns, his snacks. 

Home is …. Being able to walk around in his undies all day … home is Eating cold watermelon and tropical pineapple together at the dinner table on a winter day. Home is where he is allowed to yell … to get angry … and it is ok. Home is where he can play wrestle games in the bedroom and backyard and come out of it … unscathed.

Home is where he gets unlimited hugs and kisses and learns about the important things in life. Home is where he learns how to agree to disagree and resolve conflicts.

Home is where he learns to be appreciated and listened to. Home is where his strong sense of self … his powerful self image … his confidence is built. Home is where he understands his responsibilities to contribute to the family to make it work … that little things, matter.

To sum up … I hope my ten year old son learns much … in our home .. his home.

One day, I hope, he would look back and realise that home is where he discovered wonder and learned to not only Dream … but …. To Dream BIG. One day, he remembers to repeat some of … OUR traditions … OUR unique family qwirks … our UNUSUAL ceremonies.

I hope that one day, my son looks back and views his time in his home .. our home as a period where he not only FOUND but …. EXPERIENCED, JOY.

With … his dad (me), his mum, Cathy, his sister, Olivia and our pet schnoodle : “Mr Fussy/Fuzzy Cuddles”.

Until next time,

P.

Can you see “me” in my son? Can you see you in your son?
Standard
a better life, accountability, action, adaptation, anger, anger management, attitude, authenticness, awareness, better choices, care empathy, change, change management, choices, christian, communication, courage, desire, ego, Energy, examined life, fairness, forgiveness, game of life, grace, happiness, hope, intimacy, life, listening, love, patience, perspective, real man, reflection, relationships, respect, responsibility, self, self discipline, self improvement, self-image, self-respect, successful marriage, taking action, Team work, trust, truth, you, your life

Nakedness, Humility and Vulnerability “exposes” you but this is where … Life, BEGINS and GROWTH CONTINUES.

Guilt. Repent from your heart. Your soul. Find your authentic self again.

Repentance.

Do you practise repentance? Why? Why not?

When you’ve done something wrong and/or have wronged someone, you firstly need to take FULL responsibility for it.

You Repent.

You repent because you realise that, that inexcusable wrong can be judged or forgiven. Inexcusable wrongs can never be understood and overlooked. Fake Repentant people seek and beg for forgiveness, with no thought of deserving it.

Yes, you read that right, they don’t deserve it. 

That is not fair – to the person that has been wronged and not fair for the person who has wronged.

To gain trust back, perpetrators need to own their “inconvenient truth” (to borrow a phrase from US Vice President Al Gore).

Truly Repentant people are people who finally understand God’s amazing grace. When you truly seek repentance, know you need only to confess to experience the forgiveness from God Almighty. 

Forgiveness is ALWAYS there in infinite supply.

My family. My dog: “Mr Fuzzy/Fussy cuddles” is missing

Selfish Choices.

Recently, I got into a very big argument with my wife of twenty years. It was probably the biggest blue we’ve had in our time together. It involved her and my family. To get straight to the point, I was an Asshole … well, okay, I was a HUUGGE Asshole! I even called myself one during the fight.

Alcohol was involved. Correction: excessive alcohol was involved.

On reflection, it is quite obvious that I was being a selfish prick! Yep, you read that right. I was being a thoughtless spouse. And here I was imagining that on my deathbed, my children and wife will remember me for many things but for mostly being the most THOUGHTFUL human being they have ever known.

After this incident, that dream/imagination may not manifest into reality. I fucked up, and my selfish choice was not “thoughtful “. I simply fucked up!

You see, whether we are adulterers or thoughtless spouses (like me, in this instance), the problem with all of us is one of perspective. Instead of thinking of our thoughtlessness (in words or actions/deeds) as INEXCUSABLE SELFISH CHOICES, we stubbornly regard our interpersonal failures as UNDERSTANDABLE MISTAKES. Understandable mistakes, can you believe that?! It comes down to a small but significant factor of perspective, or the way we view something.

And in my recent case: I clearly made a selfish choice and my perspective was NOT the right one.

To find your Authentic self, you need to embrace your demons

Seek to understand first.

I’m not one for giving excuses or listening to excuses, but during and after that big argument, I found myself giving excuses. It just rolled out of my tongue and the strange thing was that I was fully aware of this roll-out while it was happening. And here’s the catch: I did not stop this conveyor belt of excuses.

When I reflect, I realise that excuse-making has been a part of almost every area of life that has humans participating. Excuse-making has been a natural tendency in people since, I guess, Adam blamed Even for eating the apple and … Eve blamed the Snake for persuading her. It’s been around for a long while. 

I guess, without some form of self-justification, we are forced to look at ourselves in the mirror, just as we truly are … not necessarily, the image the mirror reflects.

Now, based on how I argued in that fight, the standards I adhered to fell very short of God’s standards. My actions and words deserved punishment.

I read somewhere that a wise person seeks to understand before wanting to be understood.

That is something I need to improve in my life. What about yours?

What does your mirror reflect of you? What if it reflected who you really are? What would it reflect? What feedback would your emotional and logical minds give you? Would they reinforce each other? Would this spark Fears and would those fears escalate? How would you control them? Tip: take responsibility.

Joy evolves from misery.

When we really look at ourselves in the mirror and truly see ourselves as we are, would we accept our status as sinners.

And what are sinners? Sinners, like me, are worthy of judgement. We are powerless to improve ourselves … and are humbled that our best deeds provide no defence.

We are GUILTY!

Guilty in the eyes of GOD.

Is this fun? It isn’t someone’s idea of fun, surely. However, fun … joy, yes, joy … had evolved and can evolve from misery.

If you desire it. 

Here’s how …

Co-Captain/CEO of our Viking Pirate ship in the different seas of life .

Be Naked, be humble, be vulnerable.

Be naked, be humble, be vulnerable.

That is how Joy evolves from misery. Throughout my experience and learning from other people’s experiences, I’ve learned that those who make themselves naked and vulnerable and basically more human, are the ones who get the most trust.

Or at least, get part of or most of the lost trust back.

It is through the process of embracing genuine nakedness, humility and vulnerability, that you find your AUTHENTIC SELF.

I believe, moving closer to your authentic self is not only where life BEGINS but also …. Where JOY blooms and your GROWTH CONTINUES.

Now, as a Physique Artist, I regularly strip down to a pair of “g-strings” on stage, under very strong lights to display the ‘flow of muscles’ … and ‘paint a picture of moving art’, using my sculpted physique, from my heart … to the hearts of the audience.

It is one of the closest you can get to being naked, humble and vulnerable. By being vulnerable, humble and exposed, I find you allow yourself to be more open and transparent. This is important for any relationship. For me and my wife, this is vital. Always has been.

I am an “open book” and this nakedness, this humility, this vulnerableness, demonstrates to her that that I have nothing to hide ( or an impression anyway).

Now, allow yourself to strip yourself of EGO and wear your “G-STRING of YOUR SOUL”. That takes COURAGE. Seek Courage… for without courage, no great achievement is every attainable.

For me, in all my most important relationships, Trust is vital. It is one of the key foundation stones of my 21 year relationship with the most important woman in the world to me- my wife.

I believe Trust is Powerful; it always has been.

ALL the very best to you

Yours in iron, muscles and mind,

Cheers & ahoy from beautiful Sydney, Australia!

Me in my g-strings during Competition in bodybuilding/physique artistry.
“Back Double Biceps” in the heat of competition! Change from the gym to the stage is quite significant with management of key variables being extremely important. Placing: 2nd in Australia
I love this quote. Increasing your awareness is parameters to having clarity and success in your life. SEARCH. Become the BEST ‘searcher’ you can be. One day .. you may find ALL the answers you’re seeking for YOUR questions to give ‘meaning’ to your life. A wonderful book says – “Seek and ye shall find; Ask and ye shall receive.” True.
Standard
a better life, action, adaptation, art, authenticness, awareness, Beliefs, care empathy, caring, chaos, choices, communication, compassion, courage, Energy, examined life, fairness, friendship, fundamentals, game of life, God, happiness, honour, Leader, leaders, life, long-term perspective, perseverance, perspective, real man, responsibility, risk, self love, self-respect, trust, you, your life

Walking the walk before you talk the talk … is vital to being more Authentic.

The old Captain Viking Pirate 🏴‍☠️ ⚔️Enjoying a beer 🍺 in a hot 🥵 spring day here in Sydney Australia 🇦🇺

On the other end of the spectrum. 

In a past phase of life, I was a Business Advisor and Corporate Consultant to a number of multinationals. I specialised in “cleaning up other people’s messes” and correcting accounting treatment errors and assessing Risks for companies. I enjoyed the relationship management side of things.

In one particular consulting firm, I went to one of the Firm’s many corporate functions. It was the usual shit, people talking about trivial unimportant things like the weather. In this particular function, one of my colleagues on a similar seniority level to me approached me and said –

“Paul, I can tell you don’t want to be here. I’m the spectrum of connections, everyone here would be on one end … the “superficial end, and you, my friend… you’re all the way on the other end of the spectrum.”

I said –

“you’re right. I’m leaving. Goodbye.”

I took my tie off and left the function.

I resigned from that role, not too long after that. … buying a gym and operating other businesses of interest.

Friends that workout together … stay together?
Some of the family of gym members that called my gym ….. our gym .. their gym.
Lovely people in a lovely phase of life.

Old-school Gym with a modern twist.

In one phase of my life, I owned & managed Australia’s Longest-running Gym at that time. I poured my heart & soul into it… I ran it like a Family.

The gym was old-school traditional with a lot of history. For example, the great 7 x Mr Olympia Arnold Schwarzenegger trained in this gym when he was Mr O (the @mrolympiallc was held in Sydney, Australia in 1980, which he won, after a 5 year lay-off). He even took a few famous photos in this gym, of him, going through some of his poses.

Frank Zane, arguably one of the most aesthetically built physique artists during his prime worked out here. He won the “super bowl of bodybuilding “ – the Mr Olympia Title three years in a row (1977 – 1979). He had visited that place and a few other greats, too. The Dumbells we used and many of the machines were the same ones we used back in the 70s. We used the weight-training equipment that Champions used.

But, my gym was not about the equipment and the fancy lights, it was about the people. People passed 15 other gyms because they wanted to be part of this special gym. They wanted to be part of my extended family. I was very proud of the culture I created, of the love that we all shared. 

I liked to say that it was an “old school gym, with a modern-twist “ … and I was the modern-twist.

They knew that I CARED. And gave them the results/needs they were looking for.

My grandfather used to always tell me when I was a kid –

“Nobody cares how much you know until they know how much you care.”

Very true indeed.

That challenging, yet beautiful phase of my life came to an end 6 years ago, when I sold it.

My Family of friends in my gym I owned and managed for 7
years.
All working towards being the ‘best the can be’

A few things to be aware of when choosing a gym.

A few notes on gyms –

If you’re a beginner (in weight training), look for a good gym. A gym that caters to your needs. There are many types of gyms today – big, small, studios and out-door gyms. It depends on your preference. Before choosing a gym, evaluate things like – cleanliness & hygiene; whether they have lockers or not (most modern gyms do); the condition of equipment  – you don’t want holes in upholstery and they should be well-maintained; the Equipment Manufacturer (some manufacturers are better quality than others; $$ (your budget) – if you’re looking for just weights & cardio then you don’t need to pay extra; the friendliness & authenticity of owner – Do they have “skin in the game?”

Now, why should you take advice about gyms from someone like me. Well, it’s simple: I have and have had “skin in the game” and still do. I have walked the walk before I can talk the talk”. You should always apply this approach with anyone offering you advice in any field, especially if they call themselves an “Expert”. I’m sure you do. 

You can read a little more on “choosing a gym”.

Anyway, I hope your gym visits are going great!!

until next time,

Gym Extended Family Members enjoying a day of Lawn Bowls.
We had some great lawn bowls events over the 7 years.

Winning this award in 2008 for the BEST GYM in the Northern Beaches of Sydney was the best award I have ever received (better than my 2 x World Championship trophies)
It was an award judged and voted on by the residents of the Northern Beaches on the BEST GYM & related Services in the Health & Fitness category

Standard