I love stories and storytelling. Do you?
I love listening to stories that people share. Everyone has a story in them. I have heard many stories from the hundreds of people that I have had the opportunity to help over the years. This blog is one such story.
A courageous story of finding the strength within and overcoming fear and the journey towards a better quality life. A few years ago, a member of my gym asked if I could get his wife to come and see me about ‘fixing’ her back. She had been suffering for about 20 years. He was very happy with the success he was getting in one of my programs and he asked me to call his wife as he had failed to persuade her to come see me. I did something a little different. I wrote her a little message on my business card saying “please come in and tell me your story”. I gave her a date and time.
To my surprise she turned up.
Typical of a lot of women, she was a little scared of gyms with a view that it was a place only for men, people who wanted to put on huge muscles and was an unfriendly, male-dominated domain that was not welcoming to women. I knew it was difficult because she had a belief fueled by mis-perceptions.
We sat down and I listened to her story to that point in her life. She had suffered from excruciating back pain and had been in and out of many different professionals for almost 20 years. Visits alleviated pain temporarily but her quality of life had been hampered by the pain and was slowly deteriorating. Her whole family suffered with her too. I discussed my philosophy to training and the framework I would use to help her. I asked her to give me 3 weeks of her life. She needed to see me for half an hour twice a week. A total of 6 visits.
She hesitantly agreed.
She had demonstrated a great deal of courage, just to consider trying something different but also something she truly feared: being in the gym. At this point in her life, she had tried almost everything and nothing was working and she desperately needed a better result. A pain-free existence.
My objective was to help her experience a better quality life, a life without daily back pain and life she could only dream about. I had less than 3 weeks to produce a result. A miracle, but I could not do it without her help. She faced a challenge and I reassured her that we would face it together. The first thing I needed her to do was to stop naming and talking about her pain. This would stop giving them power over her – sucking away at her life through her attention and fear of them.
I got her to imagine the end result (pain-free existence) and feel its reality. I needed her to change her belief and managed to convince her that “according to your belief, is it done unto you”. I then got her to tie this new belief mentally and emotionally within her being. With this renewed belief in herself, my program and me, we went to work. She got to do things that she had been advised not to do for almost two decades.
Let me give you an example: She was afraid to bend and reach for her toes and had the belief that it would make her back problem worse. She did things in the gym with me in her first week that she had feared. By the end of the second week, she told me that the pain in her back was gone. I expected it but not that soon. In the third week, her two teenage children attending university came in to the gym to personally thank me for what I was doing with their mum. It was the first time in their lives that they did not hear their mum complain of her back being sore. They had seen and heard her suffer in pain all their life. Every single day!
I was touched.
I told them the real miracle was that their mum was prepared to do the things she was afraid to do. The healing power was brought about by a changed mental attitude. She essentially cured herself with a little help from me. As I had been there before, I was only a tour-guide but she did the work and journey all on her own. The real courage she demonstrated was the open-mindedness and flexibility to adopt a new way of thinking and acting. That was my true challenge, not the weight-training part.
To cut a long story short, this lady who was afraid of even bending down to just touch her ankles went on to not only do it but she also ended up being the strongest woman in my gym. She dead-lifted 140kgs for 6 reps on a good day. And she was in her mid-50s with no prior training experience. She remained pain-free for the entire time she trained with me – over two years! She got her life back. Her quality of life improved greatly.
When I think back about her miraculous transformation, I knew from the time I first met her that she was a naturally strong woman but she had lost her faith in herself. Her belief in her own inner-strength. This is an example of the many little miracles that I have seen people produce, in their own little way. In their lives – changing their lives and changing the lives of others. Just like the many others, she was empowered. She was back in control.
The law of life is belief.
All religions of the world represent forms of belief and these beliefs are explained in many ways. This client of mine went from thinking why she was getting certain results to asking herself how she was creating the pain she was experiencing in her life. She tried to understand how her beliefs and philosophy generated what happened in her life and to cease to continue believing what did not serve her. I got her to shift her focus consciously and intentionally to what she did want (pain-free back).
She did it.
You too, can achieve your own miracles. Little miracles happen everyday and its all around us. What you focus on is the KEY to everything! For any outcome, whether internal or external, there’s a certain way of thinking and acting that will get it for you. Its like weight-training, if you want strength, you need to train a certain way, if power is goal, then a different way of training is necessary to achieve the goal desired. There is a different path for different goals.
Your task is to find this new way of Thinking and Acting. You then have to be flexible enough to adopt the way of thinking and acting that will get you there. Finding that new way is the easy part. The difficult part is the applying and adapting.
My tip to you: watch “inside” to manage “outside”. There is a saying that goes “it is done unto you as you believe”. What do you believe about yourself, life and the universe? What is the belief of your mind or put simply, what is the thought of your mind?
All your experiences, all your actions, and all events and circumstances of your life are but the reflections and reactions to your own thought in your thought factory.
Watch your thoughts!
Until next time,