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The KEY Skill of IMPERTURBILITY

Do you see the “FOCUS “ in my eyes?

Weapons of Mass Distraction.

Individuals like you and me have been battling many battles since we were born. Heck, human beings have all battled battles every day since the beginning of time.

Many battles – some Real, many Imaginary.

I like to think of these as the PRISONS WITHIN. Most of us live within the prison of our own minds, with anxieties, fears and uncertainties cluttering our brains and steering us away from mental freedom.

Currently, we are waging a war against being distracted. Yes, you read that right … we are constantly waging a daily war against formidable Goliaths, ripping our control over our ability to FOCUS.

These formidable Goliaths control the platforms and framework on which the increasing advanced technologies rest … and are voraciously consumed by the masses. Individuals have easy and relatively cheap access to and from the Weapons of Mass Distraction (WMD). 

In the 90s, we came to know what the “Weapons of Mass Destruction” were during the annihilation of parts of the Middle-East.

Who are “YOU?” Learn to love ❤️ YOU, first.

Are WE really winning?

Yes, you could argue that we are winning against the infectious diseases that have afflicted the human race. The advances mankind has made in the last 50 years in the fields of Bioengineering and the hard Sciences have benefited the lives of millions.

It has made our lives more convenient. The question we’ve got to ask is – convenience in place of what … our freedom and our ability to control our lives?

However, the recent COVID debacle may not support this (winning against infectious diseases).

It seems, to me anyway, that while the infectious diseases are under control (Externally) … we are losing a lot of ground in our true UNDERSTANDING OF THE SELF. This is significantly affected by the increasing tendency to be DISTRACTED.

Our individual ability to MANAGE THE MIND … our ability to manage the CONFLICTS WITHIN .. INTERNALLY … has been on a downward spiral.

People are struggling to achieve “Peace of Mind” at all levels of society. It is an epidemic.

You, me … each and every one of us NEED to guard the doors of our mind like a good bouncer guards a nightclub door and stop potential trouble-makers.

Individual’s skills at doing this varies greatly and I believe the majority still have a long way to go in terms of mastering that skill being the BEST BOUNCER TO THEIR BRAIN.

In order to be a good bouncer, you must first try to become more AWARE of YOU. This increase in AWARENESS should be a positive one. You should then FIRST try to find your own HEALTHY STRESS LEVEL in life, for example, are you a –

1)   Racehorse

2)   Tortoise

Your increase in Positive Self-Awareness should be built on a strong foundation of the KEY SKILL OF IMPERTURBILITY.

And what does this mean?

Wonderful insight in to the mind of a Great Leader. Be courageous. Everything stems from courage. Never let anyone or anything tear your dignity from you.

PRESENCE of MIND.

Being “imperturble” refers to having the coolness and Presence of Mind under ALL Circumstances … not some of the time but ALL of the time.

Having the presence of mind in ALL weather .. in calm weather … and in storms …

Having a presence of mind means having a CLEARNESS OF JUDGEMENT in MOMENTS of GREAT PERIL.

This is one of the KEY SKILLS needed to live a relatively GOOD LIFE. 

For life. 

This is a key skill that is not spoken about often … a skill that does not get ‘the light of day’ … The KEY SKILL of IMPERTURBILITY.

To dig deep, you have to dig deep.

Improving your AGILITY ABILITY Ratio strengthens your Aura of IMPERTURBILITY.

Another version of the “Warrior of Love 💕 “ within

In my experience, because individuals don’t know themselves as well as they think they do, they don’t know what their STRESS TOLERANCE Levels are. As a result, their ability to RESPOND to Stresses is very poor. They essentially DO NOT have the necessary skills to RESPOND appropriately and sufficiently.

Improving your AGILITY ABILITY is heavily influenced by your ability to ADAPT. It is in the process of adaptation that you strengthen your Agility Ability Ratio.

As a mentor told me long ago –

“It is not the smartest or strongest who survive .. it is the one that ADAPTS the fastest.”

In my experience of life and from learning from other peoples’ experiences through life, another thing that helps is to begin by ACCEPTING the IDEA … the School of Thought … that ALL STRESSES OF LIFE is “NORMAL”.

This perspective helps improve your ABILITY to ADAPT and hence your AGILITY ABILITY Ratio.

“where do I begin?” you may be thinking.

Well … 

Just BEGIN.

That is a START.

BEGIN … WITH YOU.

BEING … Just BEGIN.

BEGIN … to summon your COURAGE.

Yes .. that is where your BEGIN.

It takes COURAGE just to BEGIN.

Then .. 

BEGIN … 

BEGIN … to BELIEVE IN YOU … 

AGAIN.

And … 

AGAIN.

Just … 

BEGIN … 

Today … NOT tomorrow.

BEGIN  … to KNOW YOU … 

… the 

REAL  … YOU.

YOU CAN DO IT.

Just DO IT (love this NIKE slogan).

Go … search … for the BEST OF YOU.

Thank you.

Hey, it’s early Christmas 🎅 Day today … and here I am writing these thoughts while my family sleeps ….

so, Merry Christmas & a Happy New Year to you and your family and those you care for dearest.

Until next time,

P.

Balance & symmetry brings you closer to harmony … to beauty …closer to infinity. Just like mathematics does
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MARRIAGE: The ULTIMATE TEAMWORK.

The 💝alentine tribe (minus our dog 🐶 – Mr Fuzzy/Fussy cuddles

Marriage is Teamwork.

No matter what a husband or wife happens to be or do, MARRIAGE IS TEAMWORK.

From my experience of being married for almost twenty years now and also from learning from other peoples’ experiences, marriage is a great example of ULTIMATE TEAMWORK.

I would go further to say that, given the high rates of divorce, marriages that last are not just because of teamwork but they have teamwork because they are a TEAM THAT WORKS.

Marriage is not about the hope of WORKING AS A TEAM, it is about two people WHO COME TOGETHER… & FIT … like 6 fits into 9, to make “69”.

Family.

God is an Amazing God.

God is an amazing God.

God gives many things.

God does not give individual gifts 🎁 to frustrate a marriage. No. God gives us unique gifts to ENHANCE the marriage. God does not lead two people into a marriage to see “sparks fly”, pulling a husband & wife in opposite directions.

No… God, leads them into marriage to blend and maximise their strengths, their usefulness.

Whenever this happens in my relationship with my wife, I pray to God for his help…. To give me the strength, courage & wisdom to make good decisions.

This is where our faith in God helps us during turbulent times in the marriage. There are many forces (internal and external) that work hard to tear a marriage apart.

If you believe in your marriage & what it represents is important to you, ask for God’s guidance and work hard to keep your marriage .

My beautiful wife of almost 20 years now. My love for this human being keeps increasing every single day.

The most difficult Act of Art of all.

As I see it, much of the problems & tension that occur in marriages comes from the INABILITY to BALANCE the ACT of GIVING to your spouse /other while retaining a SENSE OF SELF.

Mastering this balance, i believe is the most difficult ACT OF ART of ALL in life. I am still trying to master this after almost 2 decades.

In other words, the tension comes from grasping or holding onto what we consider our INDIVIDUALITY. I believe no matter what our gifts, talents or personalities… when they are given To god.

With strong belief in God, he will work & blend it all out and provide balance, because that is just what God will do.

No other team that you are a part of in life – business, sport, religion, politics etc … will ever be as IMPORTANT or benefit & challenge you like a successful marriage.

It takes WORK… a lot of real hard work. It is the complete & ULTIMATE example of TEAMWORK in life.

With God (part of the team, too).

Here’s a few questions for you:

1. Has there been a time when you put one of your individual goals “on hold “ so your spouse could pursue a dream?

2. Was the eventual outcome positive for you?

Until next time …

Yours in care, compassion & trust,

P.

Here we are … my beautiful wife and I. at a dinner party.
Loving & love in the Family provides key input for Balance.
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The importance of the choice of LANGUAGE in having a HEALTHY SELF-EXPECTANCY.

I AM. I an Entrepreneur of IMAGINATION. Through Mastery of Self, I am able to be an Agent of Creative Destruction to allow the release of new ideas … new thinking … and a new Meaning. Meaning is the NEW MONEY.

Coaching conversations..

Over the years I have listened to many individuals. Listened to their stories.

Over the years I think I have had in excess of twenty thousand conversations with people of all ages. From teens to ninety-year olds.

Over the years I have had many coaching conversations. In these coaching conversations, I have helped increase individuals awareness of how their perception of events in their lives either propel them forward or hold them back.

I have listened to others and the way in which the stories they tell ourselves have the power to hold us back or propel us forward.

As an example …

The bottom line is that I wouldn’t be the person I am today if my hearing hadn’t been terrible when I was young. Neither would you.

This is why taking the time to properly frame our narratives and the stories we tell ourselves about ourselves can be so critical.

Keep your dreams alive . Snd if you’re going to dream … Dream BIG. You serve no one by being and thinking small. Think BIG!

Re-frame in away to move forward ..

Self-pity for being dealt a bad hand is easy.

Self-awareness is what brings with it empowerment and insight.

This, important first step is sometimes hard.

The first turns your past into an anchor, while the second turns it into the wind that fills your sails and keeps you moving forward.

Is there some piece of your story, personal or professional, that you’ve been able to reframe in a way that moves you forward, instead of holding you back?

Wonderful question for all to ponder. I’m one of the most self-aware person you will ever meet, but that is nothing new to me as I have been this way since I was a kid (from the adults who knew me in my youth).

Everything happens for a reason. Success is not an accident. It is based on the Aristotelian Principle of CAUSALITY. Today, we call it – “the Law of CAUSE & EFFECT.”

Cowboy 🤠 House.

Here’s one I’d like to share – I was raised by my grandparents as my biological Dad died when I was 4 years old, trying to save a person from downing … and was overpowered by the victim and drowning with that person). My biological mother was only 16 and had a choice to have an abortion but I thank her and God that she didn’t.

Her decision to give me life has allowed me to not only live but to do what I do – predominantly, helped people, help themselves building their bridges from where they are to where they desire to be over the last 3 decades.

Anyways, I grew up in a large extended family – grandparents, grand uncles and aunties, uncles, aunties, cousins and siblings and … visitors and extended family visiting.

My home was always full and was always noisy. Our neighbours used to call our home – the “Cowboy House”.

We didn’t have much of anything – food (there were no less than 10 people to feed every single day … and I do not know how my grandparents managed to do this), didn’t have much material possessions (my grandmother used to sew my school uniforms) … but the home certainly had a lot of love.

There was a lot of storytelling and sitting around talking almost every night. It was just part of the home … part of the culture.

Because there was so much noise, most kids would not be able to concentrate/focus. But, I told myself way back in early Primary School that I will teach myself to study/do school work/read in … noise.

My teachers couldn’t understand how a kid (me) could get Top Academic Results every year.

Most kids/people need peace and quiet to FOCUS, so we are told. “How does Paul do it?” I would over hear some teachers say. In my adult life, I have continued to learn/read/focus in any environment, no matter how noisy or ridiculous is.

The only photo I have as a baby with my biological mum. One of my 3 Mums in my life.

Focus on what you can control

I remember my grandfather telling me many things (he was a very wise man) … saying something to the effect –

“Paul, focus on what you can control … and do the best with what you’ve got … don’t be part of the problem, always be part of the solution”.

I’ve always applied that in my life, not focusing on insufficient resources and constraints .,. But on HOW I can do better with what I have. That philosophy along with many others, has helped me create the life I’ve always imagined and realise short-term and long-term goals.

Growing up in an family environment that had very limited resources (except for love … the home was always infused with LOVE), has allowed me to almost always have an overall attitude of personal optimism and enthusiasm.

I completely understand the psychosomatic relationship – psyche and soma – mind and body … better than most (hence sculpting a Physique worthy of representing Australia at 2 x World Natural Physique Championships and placing in the Top 5 in consecutive years).

I am fully aware of how the body is the physical manifestation of the mind or in other words, the body expresses what the mind is concerned with. I’m a strong believer that life is many things … and one of which is that life is a self-fulfilling prophecy…. That you usually get what you expect.

My ‘tough’ upbringing has allowed me to develop a healthy self-expectancy and eliminated all forms of excuse from my vocabulary as … I expect to win, almost all the time. I have no doubt the so-called ‘luck’ is the intersection of preparation and awareness.

Leadership ability begins in the home … children learn character building in the home Be the best character you can be … for YOU, first .. and then for your kids my two children a number of years ago

Life … a very real game but not a gamble.

I look at life as a very real game .. but not a gamble.

Part of what I have done over the last 3 decades is help people, help themselves build their bridges. I have learned and taught many things. It seems that every individual tends to receive what he or she expects in the long run.

From my experience and deducing from other people’s experiences in my life so far … it would appear that you may or may not get what is coming to you, or you may or may not get what you deserve – BUT YOU WILL nearly always get what you expect.

As someone who has mastered the art of body re-engineering (building muscle and reducing body fat to < 4%), believe me when I say, there is an intricately close connection between your mind and body … a negative thought can cause your ‘look’ (that you get judged on) to go from excellent (Top 5 and finalist) to awful.

I’ve learned and mastered much of the ‘mind-body-heart-soul’ interface connections and one important one is this – mental obsessions have physical manifestations. Basically, you BECOME WHAT YOU FEAR – you get what you expect – you are that which you expect to be!

Here’s the thing – since all individuals are responsible for their own actions and cause their own effects, optimism then, is a choice.

Choose well, my adult friends.

Balance & symmetry brings you closer to harmony … to beauty …closer to infinity. Just like mathematics does

Optimism, Enthusiasm, Faith & Hope.

What is needed is : continual fueling of – OPTIMISM, ENTHUSIASM, FAITH & HOPE.

Each is a synonym for – having a HEALTHY SELF-EXPECTANCY.

So, my question to you (if you’ve made it this far) is –

1. Do you have a healthy self-expectancy about things in your life?

2. Do you expect the best for you – in life and as a way of life?

3. Do you look at problems/constraints as opportunities?

With regards to question 3 above, try this little exercise and let me know your answers –

Make a list of your KEY problems/constraints –

> the ones that block your professional and personal fulfillment.

> Next, write a one-or-two sentence definition of each problem/constraint.

Now, rewrite the definition, only this time view it as an opportunity or exercise to challenge your creativity and ingenuity (some refer to it as ‘re-framing’).

Here’s a tip: view the solution as you would if you were advising one of your best friends.

So, where does your thoughts stand in relation to your Self-Expectancy now?

Write in and tell me all about it.

Thank you

Yours in care, compassion & trust,

Paul

A fridge magnet 🧲 I bought almost 20 years ago. Practise this.

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DO YOU KNOW?

Believe. Embrace Creative Destruction. You never know what you’ll discover.

Here’s a little poem wrote (unedited) … I write as I think 💭… here we go –

Do you know?

That ..

To know is to not know?

That

To know but not know that you know

Is ..

akin to one who sleeps all day and so does not know

But …

To not know and not know that you not know

Well …

That is as good as one who is dumb-shit, you know!

And …

The last standing, lone warrior

The last one ☝️ …

The last one ☝️ we all need to stand for

And follow

Now.

That is the one that knows

The one ☝️ that “sees” what others do not see

The one ☝️

The last one standing

Knows that he knows

That lifts all spirits of those who believe to and fro

To be cheered for again and again

Because

He is one who cheers for all

And stands for all

Not because it is his right to do so

No

Because it is the right thing to do

You know…

Again and again

For

He is one who knows that he knows

In a sea of ones who think they know

And

do not know that they do not know

For

They think 💭 they see and say the right words to pretend that they see

But to no avail

Because

Truth always shines through

Always

Like the sun ☀️ will rise and set

You should follow the one because that is your best bet

To find your truth

Your beauty

What do you think 🤔?

Do you think 🤔 you know?

Which one are you?

I don’t know

Do you know?”

– GURU Paul 💝alentine –

My gift 💝 to you, fellow Insta tribe-within-a-tribe -within – a….

So… there you have it … a few thoughts from me … what say you?

Have no doubt. Help yourself first. You are more than just YOU… God will meet you half way … he ALWAYS does. All you ahve to do is: BELIEVE.
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White Lies & Black Lies.

White & Black Lies should be minimised in families.

Withholding Truth

G’day & Bula & good morning/evening to YOU wherever YOU are in this beautiful planet 🌏!

I was thinking 🤔 about life, as I usually do & the concept of “truth” in particular and lies as well as they seem to be two sides of the same coin.

Lying 🤥, we all do it and have done it over the course of our lives so far.

We lie to others & we lie to ourselves. I guess we could split lies up in to two main types:

1. White lies

2. Black lies.

The 💝alentine tribe (minus our dog 🐶 – Mr Fuzzy/Fussy cuddles. As parents we try to be as truthful to our children.

White Lies & Black Lies.

A black Lie, as I see it, could be defined as a statement we make we know is false. A white lie is a statement that we make that is not in itself false but that leaves out a significant part of the truth.

I think white lies can often be more destructive than black-lying. Think 💭 about it, we all do it almost every single day of our lives , as we consider white-lying more socially acceptable in many of our relationships because we “don’t want to hurt people’s feelings.”

Yet, people complain that their social relationships are generally superficial. Is this the right thing to teach our kids – that, as parents, part of being loving is feeding them heaps of white lies?

Is it right and truly beneficial for the children to not be told the cold truths about matters of life? Should parents continue (& I see this happening every day and have witnessed in many families over the last 3 decades of keen interest) “white-lying?”

So, parents tell each other everything but feed their children white lies. For example, that they fought with each other the night before about their relationship, or that their dad resents their grandparents for their manipulativeness & lack of caring over the years or that mum has a medical problem.

Rational behind white lies is – a loving desire to protect & shield their children from unnecessary worries.

The thing is , the children will know anyway.

Her heart ❤️ (& his) belongs to me … for now.

Protection or deprivation?

The reason to protect the child/children is, at best, a genuine form of misguided love 💕. Protected from what?

Is it really helping & protecting the child/children? Or is it detrimental? I think it would be more the latter.

White-lying is not protection but deprivation!

Children are deprived of many things –

⁃ knowledge about the situation

⁃ Their parents

⁃ Their grandparents

⁃ Life

⁃ People in general

So, ultimately, it comes down to what “version of the truth” are we willing to share with the world?

Can you see “me” in my son? Can you see you in your son?

Is Love the answer … is it Discipline with Discipline?

It also comes down to love and how we define love for ourselves. To tell white lies, do we love more than not telling white lies?

How do you define “love?”

This is a hard one ☝️ as love 💗 is just too large, too deep even, in my opinion, to be truly understood or measured or limited within a framework of words.

The bible tries to explain what love is but I don’t think 🤔 or at least I haven’t come across a truly satisfactory definition of love.

I know what love is not!

Contrary to what we’ve been told , love is not a feeling.(I will elaborate on what l mean another time)

I think love comes down to the desire to nurture one’s own or another’s spiritual growth. And this takes discipline, lots of discipline.

Discipline that needs to be constantly disciplined.

Discipline with discipline!

What do you think? Food for thought 💭.

End of the week … hang in there and continue moving forward in the roles you play in your life.

Gotta go now … have a great day!

Cheers 🍻!

– GURU Paul 💝alentine –

My gritty Viking pirate 🏴‍☠️ princess 👸
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What does IT all mean ?

What’s on my mind?

Here is one ☝️ loooong thought 💭, posing questions –

I love this quote. Increasing your awareness is parameters to having clarity and success in your life. SEARCH. Become the BEST ‘searcher’ you can be. One day .. you may find ALL the answers you’re seeking for YOUR questions to give ‘meaning’ to your life. A wonderful book says – “Seek and ye shall find; Ask and ye shall receive.” True.

What does IT all mean… ?


Me, you, everyone else … everyday?
The Everyday.
What does IT all mean?
The empty words .. the useless thoughts … the lies we tell ourselves.. the lies we tell others … the ineffective actions.. the roads, the cars, the buildings, the bright lights … everyday …
The Everyday.
The thing we call and hang on to called …
Life.
The Life…
… we thought we had … the life we now live … the life we thought we would have…
The Life …
we would like to Create.
What does it all mean?
When does Life begin?
In the womb ?
… at conception?
Why?
When does laughter really begin?
In the womb?
At conception?
Why?
Life …
When does life end?
When does laughter end?
Does life end when laughter ends … or is it the other way round?
Does it matter?
Does IT begin with the rise of the sun ☀️.. everyday?
Does IT end with the setting of the sun 🌞.. everyday?
Is the Sun our true measure of time?
Is the sun our pendulum of …
Life?
What does IT all mean?
Where does our “time” go?
Why do we think being “busy“ is important… is right?
What about what’s left?
Who gets what’s left?
Of time … of
Life.
Why should there be a “waste” of time, when you, me, no one … can control time?
Who makes that judgement?
Is it better to fill our time with laughter?
Why? How so?
What do you believe?
Do you believe… that you’re the INFINITE?
Why?
Why not?
Do you believe you’re the culmination of each and each & every improbable moment that led to your existence?
And what about the SCARS you carry?
Do you wear them with pride? With honour?
Like badges you’ve collected along your path … your way?
For ALL to see?
Why?
Why not?
What are you hiding? Who are you hiding it from?
Does it IT really matter?
You hesitate?
Don’t!
Don’t even allow any of your future precious moments be taken up by “looking down on yourself “
There are enough people in the world who would gladly do this – “put you down … “
So, don’t do it to yourself.
It’s not worth your …
Life ..
That is THE INFINITE.
YOU are … The INFINITE.
So…
What does IT all mean… anyway?
What abyss of time does IT fill?
IT …
The Life…
“What does IT all mean?”
I curiously ask…
Anyone? “

– GURU Paul –

So, there you go … a slice of my thoughts 💭 –

💝alentine 💝itality 💝itamins…. For life.

Stay strong. Harness your courage.

Yours in iron, muscles 💪 & 💝itality,
P.

Try … to be wise. Success is the result of being just a little bit Wiser, not necessarily, intelligent, compounded over time. How wise are you?

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2.5 Lessons I’ve learned in my life so far …

Here are a few more questions: 1) do you like the colour red? On doors? 2) Do you like doors? 3) Is a question the “door to what lies beyond?”

1.0: Great love and great achievements involve great risk.

It is worth it, if you desire it so.

Life, is many things and one of them is – life is a big exercise in Risk Management.

Remember: No Risk, No nothing.

2.0Don’t laugh at anyone’s dreams. People who don’t have dreams, don’t have much.

What are dreams?

Dreams tell dreamers what could be as opposed to what currently is. Dreams are essential to creativity and innovation and achieving goals.

They are ‘dreams with a deadline.’ Everything begins and ends in the mind, starting with your imagination/dreams. As a mentor once said –

What are goals?

If you can conceive it and believe it, you can achieve it.’

I used to tell people that if I made that person I see in the mirror better than, last week, than last month, than last year … in ten years I will be on the World Stage, standing and competing against the best in the world.”

Within ten years, I stood on stage against the best natural bodybuilders at that time, representing Australia. A Big Dream, come true. I repeated the feat the following year for good measure. As a great mentor once said –

If you think you can, you’re right … you CAN.”

Don’t ever laugh at another person’s dream, no matter how far-fetched it is.

Does the shape of the door affect what is inside? Why does colour matter? Why do we need doors?

2.5 Disagree with people, if you must but don’t hate them.

It’s ok agree to disagree and still like someone.

In disagreements, fight fairly. No name calling and personal judgements. Leave judgemental comments to God or people who have a profession as a Judge.

Shit happens. Stand your ground. Don’t be afraid.

So, there you go… 2.5 lessons. “0.5” as the list is far from exhaustive. I’m sure your can add many more to it from your observations of life so far.

Until next time, take good care of your lovely self

Yours in care, compassion & trust,

Paul.

A yellow door maybe? Perhaps you like the colour yellow. What is your colour blind?
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My LOYAL friend who FILLS UP My SENSES.

Do you think 🤔 this is an “Angry look?”. Why? Why not? What does your angry look, look like?

Anger, my friend.

Why has society increasingly frowned on Anger?

Why has society demonised anger? Why is it that we (especially Men) cannot and not encouraged to “get angry?” This is hammered into men right from when we are toddlers. Why? Why have we only focused on the destructive results of anger?

It is just as much a valid emotion as being happy, sad, excited, joyful etc.

I have found Anger to be a friend.

Yes, that’s right, he has been a great friend. Not a lovey-dovey friend, not a particularly nice friend, far from being a gentle friend. No, anger … is a very, veery very LOYAL friend.

Anger has always been there with and FOR “me”. Anger loyalty reminds me with ease when i have betrayed myself enough. It is there to stop anyone or anything from taking advantage of me, beyond what is reasonable.

“Reasonable “ here would refer to my imaginary boundaries/tolerance limits of certain suffering.

To me, Anger is fuel. This is a KEY aspect of the power of a loyal friend.

Anger,

I love this quote. Increasing your awareness is parameters to having clarity and success in your life. SEARCH. Become the BEST ‘searcher’ you can be. One day .. you may find ALL the answers you’re seeking for YOUR questions to give ‘meaning’ to your life. A wonderful book says – “Seek and ye shall find; Ask and ye shall receive.” True.

This friend loves me.

This friend LOVES ME.

And, I have come to love this friend, all the way back to consciously recognising him when I was about 9 years old.

Yes, it is a form of power… a powerful energy. When we feel it, we almost always want yo do something about it – hit someone, throw something, break or smash something, punch a wall or spew out profanities to the person.

Why do we do everything to it … except LISTEN to it. I mean, we are taught to … deny it, bury it, hide it, lie about it, medicate it, ignore it or simply muffle it.

Why don’t we just allow ourselves to feel and express it just like we do with other feelings?

Anger not only summons courage, but it points the finger and shows the way… an alternative way. To me, anger is a sign of health … good 💝itality.

Unlike what most of modern societies espouse, I believe anger is a good thing. It means you’re alive. Anger is part of our inner voice … it is meant to be listened to.

Not ignored.

As fuel, we can embrace the energy of anger to turbo-boost our actions to where our anger points us. Here’s the catch that many struggle with – anger is meant to be ACTED UPON, not ACTED OUT.

Highly likely if you’re one of these, you’ll certainly have a healthy relationship with your friend – Anger.

It awakens me.

Re-read that last sentence again. Let it sink in.

Every time I get angry, it reminds me that I am being courageous and expressing something that is pushing me towards my perceived boundaries. Should I tolerate it, extend the boundaries or … resist.

It AWAKENS me.

It is a a tsunami o that annihilates and with that destruction, signals that death 💀 of our old life. Anger is the springboard that springs you into your new life.

To me, anger is envigorating. It helps INFUSE me with the “essence of life” – 💝itality!

It is a tool, and like all tools, when used in the appropriate manner, allows you to CREATE something with it. It is not something to MASTER. Anger, instead should be something used as a resource .. to be tapped in to and drawn upon.

For example, I have used my loyal gym training partner & friend – “Anger” to accomplish record-breaking lifts & intensity in my workouts . He has always been there. He helps me “climb mountains” and achieve small goals in the gym. As a tool, I TRANSMUTE my loyal friend, Anger into the various mediums of Art that I express my love through.

Anger, my loyal friend, has also been the wind under my wings when I need to summon courage to fly.

I cannot live with my loyal friend.

I need him.

Every single day.

Anger, I pray 🙏 that you visit me again. Soon. I need you to fill up my senses. As John Denver sings in his song “Annie” –

You fill up my senses,

Like a night in a forest;

Like mountains in springtime,

Like a walk in the rain;

You fill up my sensors,

Come fill me again;

Come let me love you,

Let me give my love to you;

Let me drown in your laughter,

Let me die in your arms;

Let me lay down beside you,

Let me always be with you;”

And you should, too.

Embrace your Anger. Make him your friend.

Dance with him. Get to know him again, if you have to.

Let him point and … show you THE WAY.

Thank you

Until next time,

P.

Maybe all the answers to your questions lie within YOU. Your mind, your consciousness. Maybe, it is not about seeking answers but simply asking more questions. Maybe questions are asked simply for discussion and debate … to help fuel our capacity to RE-IMAGINE … a better future. A future that is NOT based on the doors of the past…/ future based on alternate possibilities of the future. A Future based on the future, not past.
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History, Family & Storytelling … & Torch Bearing.

With my gritty Viking Pirate 🏴‍☠️ Intelligent, caring & compassionate daughter, Olivia. She has heard me say many stories … over and over again.

There is Power💥 in Storytelling.

I’ve always loved storytelling.

I remember sitting with adults when I was a kid, Listening to their stories. They would say –

“Paul, why don’t you go and play with your cousins & friends outside”

I would reply –

No, there will be time to play with them later”

I’ve listened to hundreds of other people’s stories when I owned & managed my Family Gym for 7 years.

I love 💕 telling stories.

I believe there is power in storytelling.

My wife and kids. I Storytell until they get fed up… then I know, they know.

It begins in the home.

It begins in the Home…. Practising the art of Storytelling, that is.

Home is where the foundation of storytelling starts. I recall listening to my dad & his close friend’s tell stories around the Kava bowl. In the home, I got a strong 💪 foundation… Of a past that lends my existence a place, a sense of belonging, a historical context.

Home is where stories get passed on for generations. I have continued with this 💝alentine tradition. My two kids can retell the stories I tell .. because they have heard them countless times. And as my daughter says –

Dad, it keeps changing all the time”

And I say –

Aaaahhh… yes, my dear … that is where facts and imagination fuse in the optimum place”

Home is where I was told that I am built like & physically intelligent like my grandfather, Ben Valentine. A powerful & skilful National heavyweight boxing champion, going undefeated for 3 years in his prime.

Home is where I heard stories of my quirkiness from early age & my creative & innovative nature in my early youth. I heard stories of my country of birth through the filter of my own genealogy.

Struggles, family migrations, family triumphs, as well as ancestral successes & failures were taught to me through the history of my 💝alentine Family.

In my Home now, it is a place where I build my own legacy: through my love 😍 for history & storytelling, I have shared & will share more stories I was told in my youth with my children.

Always, adding my generation’s story to this 💝alentine Novel in progress. I’ve always believed the REAL histories of families aren’t the records of births, deaths & marriages. No, to me …

… they are the stories told after dinner, while having chocolate or dessert. So full and satisfied.

For i have learned many things so far, and one important one is the importance of LEGACY.

Legacy is fueled by US… in our family. It is fueled by ME. And all this evolves from our history… our family stories passed down …

As it is …

Our IDENTITY. Our ROOTS.

Balance & symmetry brings you closer to harmony … to beauty …closer to infinity. Just like mathematics does

Tell it to your children…

I found a passage from the Bible:

“Tell it to your children,

And let your children tell it to

Their children,

And their children to the next

Generation.”

– Joel 1:3, NIV

I tell my kids that one day they will bear the 💝alentine torch 🔦. They will continue to write their chapters if their lives through their storytelling.

Knowing that they have a very strong identity and they will continue to shine the torch 🔦 and build on the legacy that they inherited…

Through the strong foundation of the 💝alentine Family history through storytelling.

I am still the current Torch Bearer of the 💝alentine Family and I make a toast to all future Torch Bearers of my family and all families …

Carry the Torch with pride & Live & Die with dignity.

I love 💕 you, ALWAYS.

Yours in care, compassion & trust,

– Paul e 💝alentine –

Me.
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Businesses of the future need leaders who are Entrepreneurs of Imagination. Physique Artists are Champions at this. This is how:

I AM.
I an Entrepreneur of IMAGINATION.
Through Mastery of Self, I am able to be an Agent of Creative Destruction to allow the release of new ideas … new thinking … and a new Meaning.
Meaning is the NEW MONEY.

Building a Physique of high quality dense muscle that is balanced & symmetrical on a human being takes an high understanding of striking a balance between control and creativity.

Successful Businesses now and in near future need leaders who understand HOW to strike a balance between control and creativity in organisations…

.. if they are to survive and thrive. Business Leaders need to think like Physique Artists ... like designers.

”Businesspeople don’t need to understand designers better. They need to be designers.”

– ROGER MARTIN, dean, Rottman School of Management

Here’s how the principles of physique artistry can be used in the Corporate World.

Believe.
Embrace Creative Destruction.
You never know what you’ll discover.

What it takes.

My sport found me at 19.

It was and is the hardest sport an individual can participate in. The sport name is : bodybuilding. The great Arnold Schwarzenegger is the most famous bodybuilding champion and has done and still contributes to the wellness & fitness industry. 

I like to refer to it as : Physique Artistry.

To master the “Art” you need to master – YOU.

It is the fusion of science 🧬/engineering and art(design/creativity). 

I got to the Top of my sport. Representing Australia to two consecutive world 🌎 NATURAL bodybuilding championships in New York, USA.

It was a 10 year goal (To stand on the world stage against the best in the world). I developed and managed the best execution of a 10 year plan. I achieved (& exceeded) the goal in that time by making the Finals (Top 5) in both championships.

It took /takes a lot to build muscle.

It took much much more knowledge to Sculpt a “physique “. One that leans towards “ better balance & symmetry “. Consistency, focus, persistence and belief got tested in the journey towards my best. It took learning to  listen” to the myriad of feedback signals the human body and mind Gives you, positive or negative feedback. Being “in-tune” with yourself is key 🔑 to success in this sport.

Sticking to the plan and making changes based on feedback signals ⚒️ I have (the mirror, the scale, energy levels …) where and when necessary to changing circumstances was part and parcel of the journey. It was science 🧬 & art constantly fused together. It is one of the reasons I love the art/science of physique artistry – it feeds in to my thirst for learning.

I know “what it takes.” A big part of this is the “connection “ I have with me … and my enhanced listening /detective abilities of the myriads of feedback my body gives me.

One of my Top 3 Physique Artists of all time.
Balanced & symmetrical ==> beauty.
And when you CREATE your beauty my friend is …
When you discover your TRUTH.

Tomorrow’s Organisations need to create a culture that supports feedback and embrace creativity and “Imagine BETTER”.

In creating a physique that is worthy to represent your country against the best in the world, you need a very good understanding of balancing Control and creativity.

As a physique artist I am constantly tearing down the old me … designing the new me, from within… I have to continue to let my imagination and heart lead me. I am constantly trying to IMAGINE BETTER.

That is what business leaders of tomorrow need to be: Entrepreneurs of Imagination. By testing and exceeding our own personal limits, can society’s horizons be expanded and enriched. That is the way all civilisations innovated .

As Fredrich Nietzsche (1844 – 1900) said –

whoever must be a creator always annihilates”

As a Champion Physique Artist I need to not only continually monitor what can be controlled in the “micro-environment “ but also the macro-environment. All this is balanced with the creativity and freedom needed to “push-boundaries “ in training and nutrition.

Excelling in physique artistry requires you to continuously assess actions and evaluate feedback from your body. You need to embrace feedback, whether it is negative or positive and constantly ‘tweak’ existing or create new processesses to and environment that is very dynamic and rapidly changing.

And what is ‘creativity?”. The artist, Rassouli said –

“Creativity is the manifestation of the playful spirit of a creator having fun.”

As a Physique Artist, I see the whole body as one but I see it as having many moving parts. An important task I have to do is ensure that all the parts ‘flow together’ and are in ‘harmony’ in an ever-changing environment. Depending on feedback received and assessed, I will be able to have the courage to try new things or ‘new ways’ and still achieve the desired results or better. and ‘getting it right’.

In organisations, there are lot of different parts/divisions and they need to all work together, in relative harmony and effective communication in these relationships, between these divisions is the key.

All good and effective feedback has a strong 💪 foundation of strong 💪 relationships. Feedback should come from someone the recipient respects and has built a good relationship with.

In my experience, for feedback to be most effective, however, it helps that the  parties involved need to see the persons as “people” first and foremost instead of titles & roles. This allows people to let their guard down and feel comfortable to take risks and fail. It is the ‘fear of failure’ that stalls new ways of thinking about doing things and this is emphasised by some organisations in bad performance reviews.

Freedom to be vulnerable is a contributor to creative thinking. This freedom is not encouraged by many organisations. Those that do encourage this freedom and build processes and systems that encourage and foster creative-thinking idea formulation will increase their chances of remaining competitive in fast-changing, increasingly uncertain world we live in.

We need business leaders to encourage “Creative Destruction “ … and Entrepreneurs are essential to economic growth because only they disrupt the status quo to challenge conventional business models.

Just like I have done for many many years as a physique artist and an entrepreneur.

These are Key ingredients for successful creative thinking & innovative behaviour.

Keep your dreams alive .
Snd if you’re going to dream … Dream BIG.
You serve no one by being and thinking small.
Think BIG!

Get your hands dirty, to find the diamond.

A key part of effective organisations is having well-oiled processes that are aligned with the overall mission of the organisation (make profit, increase market share etc). This is the same for building a Physique that is beautiful, that is, ‘flows’ with balance and symmetry. A physique that exudes great design.

There are many Systems for feedback that I  use with physique artistry. One of my key systems, I call it the “3-step to showing my diamond 💎 to the world“:

  1. mining – how I manage (mix n match all the variables – how much cardio, how long, what type? Best food combos ? ). Organisations  need a process of how employees are to voice grievance with others . Maybe write down “why”. Here’s where you “get your hands dirty “.

2. Re-fining : making sure that I make the right substitutions at the right time (from the larger goal … to monthly and weekly and daily goals). This is where the bulk of my time is Spent – in the beginning when working through the process of setting goals.

Organisations need to separate the “facts”‘from emotions and “he says” – “she says”. Leaders and participants in this “feedback “ process, needs to Spend time here. Refining.

3. Defining: once my goals (micro & macro employees should have the ability to re-write what they wrote initially after learning about all the other information in the two stages. This is a stage of reflection. How can you do or say things better?

Processes of feedback could be done this way, for example. 

In their book, “Thanks for the Feedback”, Douglas Stone & Sheila Heen stressed that feedback is about the quality of relationship, as I mentioned earlier –

Feedback isn’t about the quality of the advice or the accuracy of the assessments. It’s about the quality of the relationships, your willingness to show that you don’t have it all figured out, and to bring your whole self – flaws, uncertainties, and all – into the relationship.”

It is the formula I use to project manage my building of muscle &  the design & creativity I apply. I need to keep introducing these principles to encourage muscle growth and burn fat.

I love this quote. Increasing your awareness is parameters to having clarity and success in your life.
SEARCH. Become the BEST ‘searcher’ you can be.
One day .. you may find ALL the answers you’re seeking for YOUR questions to give ‘meaning’ to your life.
A wonderful book says –
“Seek and ye shall find;
Ask and ye shall receive.”
True.

Feedback: Food for Champions. Organisations to allow “feedback” to be seen as “Opportunities to learn”.

That is exactly the approach I take when listening to the various feedback loops my body gives me – the micro and the macro: I always see it as an opportunity to learn.

I see all feedback as “food for champions “.

Personally, I’ve Always had a “feedback – seeking behaviour. I subsequently found out that it is a self-regulatory trait in learning & orientation. Probably explain why I’ve always believed in learning from someone who “has skin in the game” in every key area in life.

To me, it is part of a “Champion mindset “. Being eternally curious  like me, demonstrates an awareness of feeling psychologically safe enough to proactively seek out feedback with the intention for self-improvement.

Organisations and its leaders need to emphasise a “learning environment “ instead of one based on fear.  Evolving a “Culture of Learning’ is key to success and emphasising the importance of having a ‘growth mind-set’. Having a growth mind-set is part-and-parcel of being a great Physique Artist. 

But, bear in mind there are no perfect learning people, even if you have a close-to-perfect feedback system like the human body.

To dig deep, you have to dig deep. To find “YOU “, you need to Mine … for your diamond 💎…Re-fine YOU… and then Define … your BEST YOU.

Feedback is essential to enhancing effectiveness and creativity but the feedback process needs good design. 

There are no perfect feedback systems. All business people need to be good designers.

Most adults are wired to fear failure. It’s drummed into people by our archaic outdated education systems.

Organisations suffer because staff are afraid to take risks as there isn’t an environment that encourages this. In physique artistry, it’s important to feel the freedom to take “calculated risks” on key aspects that will have a dramatic effect on your final outcome.

just like I need to create the right environment, an environment that encourages an anabolic response from muscles 💪, an organisation needs to create a culture where failing is not the focus.

Businesses will need leadership has the ability and fortitude to experiment with novel combinations. This inspiration-centred approach will inevitably have many mistakes but the journey from innovation to commodity is so swift that individuals and organisations must be relentless if they are to remain competitive.

For a organisation, The question is what should you do with the failure? What can we learn from it? A great physique artist learns to have a strong 💪 “connection “ with his self … it is a strong relationship, one based on experimentation, process and reflection and assessment (using the mirror is a key component – the mirror does not lie).

As Trevor Baylis, INVENTOR said –

“The key to success is to risk thinking unconventional thoughts. Convention is the enemy of progress. As long as you’ve got slightly more perception than the average wrapped loaf, your could invent something.”

That is, what organisations need to do through the feedback process : to focus on the human connection… the relationship and building that “emotional labour”. Developing and going through the process of reflection and “looking in the mirror “ and actually asking the RIGHT questions:

  • why do they do the things the say they do?
  • Is there a better way?
  • What are their intrinsic values ?
  • Are these values tied to their purpose
  • How are they giving value to their loca & global communities.

Most Innovation and inventions and breakthroughs come from reassembling existing ideas in new, creative ways.

I love Trees. Be like a Tree. Let go of old ways of doing things … like trees let go of their leaves … each season to allow for new fresh ones (ideas) to evolve.

Neurons that wire together, fire 🔥 together!!

The leaders of tomorrow’s successful organisations need to create and maintain an environment that fosters support for risk-taking and creativity.

This will lead to innovation.

The organisation needs to encourage vulnerable behaviour, openness…. this evolves from More trust, more care and more patience. And this should come from the top and filter down through all the levels of the organisation.

The culture is to be fuelled by a change of thinking … a re-wiring of the brain 🧠 to create a way of thinking that does not fear failure. And not just with words or “window-dressing “.  It should be authentic.

The environment should be one that fosters “Champion Feelings and Champion Thinking. An organisation that focuses on feedback being a learning experience and opportunity, like a good physique artist does with his self.

Lesrning to have Champion Feelings and Champion thinking is Something that all employees can learn to be better at. This is encouraged with feedback processes that is there to enhance learning. Organisations where employees are allowed to be themselves and be comfortable being vulnerable.

Build your bridge from where you are to … where you desire to be. A lot of times, it pays to get help from an experienced builder… who “walks the walk” ..& not all “just talk”


Mr Vulnerable, where are you … come out, come out … wherever you are!

In much of today’s modern society, allowing oneself to be vulnerable is not something that is encouraged. There are “pockets of this kind of behaviour “ here and there, but on the whole, It is frowned upon.

Men should never show weakness and vulnerability. It requires a lot of courage from employees (especially men). What is needed is undying support from leaders of the organisation.

As we know, learning can be painful (and i have learned many painful lessons lifting weights in the gym). The key thing is to allow yourself to learn to be better at “being comfortable being uncomfortable “.

Learning, like muscle growth, needs stimulation and involves  change snd adaptation. It is the process of adaptation that new muscle grows (.new exercise techniques to maximise growth). In businesses, change and adaptation happens when it wrestles with new ways of doing things and continually asking questions.

Questions that forces them to question the way they do things, Even what they think is “what’s best” or “correct “.

Here’s something I learned along the way to the Top of my sport of Physique Artistry:

“You have to be willing to be wrong! That is what leaders of tomorrow’s organisations should be focused on to foster environments that encourages more creativity.” And why is Creativity important? If you’re not exercising creativity, you may as well be dead.

“To cease to think creatively is only slightly different from ceasing to live.”  (Benjamin Franklin)

Less fear, happier employees, more creativity. Better productivity? Better profits? Is there a strong correlation, at least?

I know there is.

But, here is the thing: you don’t have to believe me. Matter of fact, you don’t and should not believe anybody- professional or not. Don’t even seek their opinion, forecast or recommendation. Just ask them to show you what they have or don’t have (in their trophy cabinet) or portfolio.

And what do I have in my cabinet? I’ve got – not one, but two world championships Trophies 🏆 & medals 🏅. I have been a business advisor to many businesses for about 10 years, as a former Accountant.

I have designed and I have run (& still) several successful businesses in my portfolio.

So… here is my question to you: HOW CAN I HELP YOU … help you, BETTER.

Cheers

Quality lean muscle that “flows” takes time & a goal of balance & symmetry

 

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