To give is to receive, so we’ve been told.
To give a gift, one does not intend to request it back. Or, wish for an equal or better value in return. The intention is for the recipient to keep the gift. Unconditionally.
We would all have our top ten gifts we could categorize as the most valuable gifts that we could give someone. Someone we care about. Maybe a stranger even. Some may place the most valuable as the ones with the most dollars. That is one view.
A gift, nonetheless.
In my opinion, and it is just my opinion, the most valuable gift you can give someone is to love them as you love yourself.
To truly understand this, I feel that firstly, one must love God. You need to learn to love your God if you don’t do it already. Love unconditionally.
You then need to love others. Unconditionally, still. In doing so, you need to seek and find value in yourself. This is important. Very important.
These are three parts of the many parts that make up the big word that is ‘love’. All three can be bundled up and used to help us all. These three fundamentals are without a doubt, one of the most effective ways of battling the on-going, destructive power of low self-worth, that we all face at various points in our lives. Little hurdles, little battles. Some battle more than others.
Genuine love is a gift. Something we give to others. Unconditionally.
It isn’t bought by their actions or dependent upon our feelings at the moment. No. It may carry strong emotional feelings but a gift is not supported by them.
No, it is a choice, a decision.
A decision we make every day, that someone is special and valuable to us.
We all have these people in our lives. Think about the people you give your genuine love to. Your mum, your dad, your siblings. Your wife or husband perhaps. Your children, your grandchildren, your nephews or nieces. You know who I am talking about – they represent the ‘special people’ in your life.
The people you value more than any other in your life, in the whole-wide world.
For me, it is undoubtedly, my beautiful wife of thirteen years and my two beautiful children we have been blessed with. My love for them is to infinity and beyond.
We recently returned from a beautiful spot in NSW, about 4 hours from Sydney. Was a lovely few days. I tell my little Valentine’s that these little trips are Valentine Vitality Vacations. My children enjoyed it, they enjoyed the different environment. They enjoyed the activities we did together as a family. We all did. A change is always good, in all areas of life, no matter how small or subtle it is.
A wise man once said: “ Life is about change. If you’re not changing, you’re not living”.
Very true. One of the keys: adaptation.
The trip got me thinking about how special they were to me – my wife and kids. Got me thinking about the immensity of their value to me. I’m sure many of you also think about this same thing too.
I simply just love them. Unconditionally. To love them is my gift to them and it is a gift for me, too. That they choose to accept my gift.
I believe to love someone also means to honor someone. Just like love, honor is a gift we choose to give someone that we consider special in our lives.
I recall a line in my vows to my wife on my wedding day included the word “to honor’. I thought about what that meant and I believe, the gift of honoring someone comes before or precedes love. It does not have to only be at a wedding. It could be anywhere, anytime.
Only you can decide who you choose to honor in your life.
Love is put into action once we have made the decision to honor another person. To place a high value on someone. Digest that for a few seconds and have a think about the people you value in your life. Do you honor them? It is highly likely that you do.
Over ten years ago, I made that decision to honor my wife and the river of my love for this beautiful, intelligent, caring, strong, fair and loving woman and life partner – has only increased as every year passes.
To honor is to love.
I intend to give and teach my two children – Olivia who is five and Zachary the art of embracing being a ‘student of life’. I believe, for those of you who have children, we can give the gift of honor to your children by:
- Helping them find value in difficult and troubled times
- Recognizing and being aware of your own parenting style, its strengths and limitations
- Providing a healthy balance in your homes (in all areas of life)
- Establishing loving boundaries
- Building positive loyalties
- Offering honor to God (giving daily thanks for all blessings for example).
- Honoring your parents.
With a better understanding of honor, I hope my children, just like you most likely hope for yours, will be more aware of the power of genuine love. And that the actions, that follows, once they have made the decision to honor someone is one that has love written all over it.
The gift of love follows the gift of honor.
Give your gifts of love and honor.
Until next time,