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Sometimes, local is BEST.

 

You learn from children and then learn from us.
It is a two-way learning experience, not one way (parents to children like some people think)

My children love going on holidays. They love being on holidays during school holidays.

They have just experienced Christmas and New Year’s celebrations and are still on holidays.

My wife and I decided a while back that we will try and experience more of Sydney, more of NSW, more of Australia before we embark on our discovery of all the other ‘foreign places to visit before you die’.

We just love ‘holidaying local’.

I recently asked my wife her view of the benefits of holidaying local and we agreed on quite a few points and the top 3 were:

  1. We experience less stress
  2. We would like to be made more aware and make our children more aware of the beauty and variety of local destinations and the excellent service they keep.
  3. We get to enjoy all the comforts that we would like to enjoy at a fraction of the cost

Don’t get me wrong, overseas travel is wonderful too. The lure of a different culture and people and food. All fantastic. However, there is so much of Australia I have not seen and have not experienced yet and one of my ambitions is to learn more of the country and its people that I have adopted.

So much to absorb. So little time.

The thing about overseas holidays that really get to me is that even up to the point of getting through the gates and on to the plane, we all seem to be rushing around. Trying to be busy. Sometimes it certainly seems that you have to speed up to slow down, which is, funnily enough the ultimate goal of being on a holiday.

We’re looking to ‘soft our minds’.

When you’re holidaying local, you don’t seem to have that problem. You firstly just tell everyone you know that you’re on holidays and treat it strictly like that or don’t tell anyone at all. You don’t take calls and you don’t return calls. You pretend that you’re holidaying overseas. Difficult to do? No, it isn’t. I simply do this by doing exactly what my two children do when they play ‘pretend games’ of princes and princesses and so forth. They don’t come out of their character roles when they play it and so my wife and I try not to either.

We ‘pretend’ we’re on holidays overseas and enjoy all the trappings but with less cost.

Holidaying local allows us to do more of what we love to do when we are on holiday and that is to ‘be on holiday’. Not spending your time travelling and in transit and increasing your stress levels for no real benefit. Nope, I like ‘softening my mind’ when I am holidaying and unlike overseas planned holidays, I like a little bit more certainty.

Like ordering at McDonalds (once in a while for most of us I hope), the certainty of knowing what I am going to get is reassuring to me. I don’t particularly like surprises. I don’t think most people do either.

I try to, however, not to over exaggerate holidays and all the great time my family experiences together during them. Instead, I remind my children that holidaying is something that we do some of the time. When you look at it as a percentage of our total time spent throughout the year, it is very small. So, when we look at it in this frame, we know exactly where to emphasise our existence – and that is in the beauty and chaos of our simple, daily lives.

I’ve always believed that one aspect of a fruitful life is to see opportunities to make the ordinary – extraordinary. Not overseas. Not in your dreams. No, simply in your everyday life. Try to make the everyday a ‘wow’ experience – for you and your loved ones.

You don’t have to look very far. Just look local. Discover more of the beauty and variety of excellent services that are on offer in your local city or neighbouring city. I’m sure you will find something new if you took the effort to look.

That is the thing though – this approach will take some effort, effort on your part to make the ordinary – extraordinary.

Whenever my family eats, one of us says our prayers not only to bless the food but to also to give thanks for all my family’s blessings. ON top of this we ask for God’s guidance and strength to help and guide our family and friends here and abroad. I try to instil in my children, an attitude of gratitude – daily at a young age.

Giving thanks to God, multiple times daily, reminds us to be in the present but more importantly reminds us not to take anything for granted. It reminds us of how lucky we are. It forces my kids to be in the ‘present’.

I also strongly believe that giving gratitude regularly to your GOD and saying THANK YOU for your blessings is like a bridge from where you are now to the life of your dreams.

My children are getting better at praying now. I tell them to think and deliberately ‘feel’ the words of gratitude that we say in our prayers as saying THANK YOU is a ‘feeling’.

Sometimes, just sometimes, it can be better to stay home and enjoy the family home and environment that you inhabit, something that some of us who live very busy lives don’t really get to do. Sometimes, the best thing you can do is to take some time out to ‘soft the mind’.

This is one of the keys to finding your own definition of success in your life as I believe the better you get at ‘softening the mind’ the better you attract success in to your life.

Remember: your mind is the most powerful success tool you have. Give it rest to get it to perform at its best.

 

All the very best to you and your family,

Until next time,

Keeping it simple is key

I AM.
Me .. & my constant companion – Mr Fuzzy/Fussy Cuddles

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I am.

My young gritty Viking Pirate Prince already getting in touch with his “feminine side’ and enjoying beauty – in cars, watches, buildings … and others
He has the best coach in the world at his disposal.

A Restful mind in Sleep is a peace of Mind.

Sleep consumes one third of our lives. Yet, most people know little about this daily excursion into our inner world. The exact functions of sleep and dreaming have been debated over the ages but are still not really known.

Sometimes we all find it difficult to fall asleep when we want to, laying there staring at the ceiling, tossing and turning.

Feeling restless.

You may have too much on your mind or not much at all. You may be over-tired or you may not be. You may simply feel restless even though you seek restfulness. For whatever reason, we all find it difficult to fall asleep when we want to. Sometimes.

Some of us, more than others.

 

I AM.

  1. I. AM.
    GOD?

I play many games with my children. They keep evolving. I like to think I do, too.

One particular game I play with my kids is one I call “I AM”.

You see my son has had problems for a while now falling asleep in his bed. As a result my wife and I take multiple trips to and from his room to try and settle him to sleep at night. Most of the time we just let him sleep in our bed. Most of the time he gets away with it. Until not too long ago, I introduced the game to him.

“What’s the name of the game, daddy?” asked my son Zachary.

I said it was called “I am”.

“How do you play it?” asks Zach.

I told him that the objective of the game was for him to say “I am” to every question I asked him. Only that phrase but with a few conditions for him to adhere to:

  • Lay still
  • Look me in the eyes
  • Whisper the answer “I am”

It’s been successfully implemented on almost every night I put my son to sleep. He doses off to sleep as he repeats the answer of “I am” to every question I ask him, most of the time with a little smile on his face.

Every time.

I thought up this game for two main reasons:

  1. To get him to fall asleep with improved regularity and with minimum resistance
  2. To condition his neuro-wiring as a foundation for his strength of mind

My gritty Warrior Viking Pirate 🏴‍☠️ prince 🤴

I know reason number 1 has been achieved so far.

As modern neuroscience confirms sleep (including napping) is critical for the health of your brain and you as a human being. Brain health, neurotransmitter release and sleep are intimately entwined. Studies suggesting that psychiatric disorder and neurodegenerative disease are often connected to some form of sleep/circadian rythym disruption.

So, work on improving your sleep patterns and focus on quality of sleep rather than quantity for your overall health.

Responsible for transmission of critical electrical, chemical & hormonal messages -internal communication

Who’s daddy’s … ?

I will know if reason number 2 is achieved in about 10 years and probably for the rest of his life. Time will tell the fruitfulness of this game that will ultimately be for his benefit.

The questions I ask him are repeated and are quite similar to these:

  1. Who’s daddy’s smartest boy? …. And he would say … “I am”.
  2. Who’s daddy’s kindest boy?
  3. Who’s daddy’s strongest boy?
  4. Who’s daddy’s fastest boy?
  5. Who’s daddy’s caring boy?
  6. Who’s daddy’s happiest boy?
  7. Who’s daddy’s loving boy?
  8. etc

Zachary would fall asleep answering “I am” to every question some of which I repeat. My daughter Olivia, who is two years older does not have problems falling asleep but I also play the game with her.

She loves it. Calms her down even further.

A “sense” of who they are is learned from the first man of significant influence in their lives –
us. Dads.

The power sitting dormant in your subconscious mind.

Just like the many other universal principles in life like for example, water seeks its own level or that matter expands when heated. It is a universal truth that whatever you impress on your subconscious mind is expressed in the physical realm.

It is akin to saying a prayer and your prayer is answered because your subconscious mind is principle. Like all principles, the facts are universal and unchangeable. It is just the way things operate.

Not sometimes. All of the time.

True?
Neuroscience is still at the level of where medicine was in the 1700s
A long way to fully understand who we are….
Who “I AM.”

 

The Power of Belief.

The subconscious mind works according to the law of belief. The Bible and probably most other religious texts is littered with examples of the power of belief.

I see my children’s minds as a bed of rich soil that will grow whatever types of seeds I plant and intend to grow. I believe in the power of prayer and the law of belief and why this game of “I am” aims to sow thoughts of happiness, goodwill, right action and success in my children’s minds.

Believe or not believe.
Get your ass off the pole of the fence (stop sitting on the fence!)
Choose.

Hopefully, the magic of the ‘compound effect’, like compound interest on a loan or investment … with time, these wonderful seeds of thought in the garden of their minds, will reap a generous harvest for them.

I have always believed that “the world within creates the world without”. This is a truth and there is a definite link between the subconscious and your conscious minds. As I have discovered in my life, and part of my line of work in helping others achieve their best and their goals – the subconscious mind is very sensitive to your conscious mind.

I learned something from my grandfather when I was very young – that nothing can stop you or anyone … but all is as thinking that makes it so.

Watch your thoughts, I say.

Learning and absorbing our habits every single day of their initial phase of their lives is what our young Princes do.
Teach them well.

Learn and apply the most important & powerful LINK.

Having a deeper understanding of this link gives you the power to help accomplish your goals. It is effectively praying and communicating to God.

Believe or not believe.

Prayers always get answered but you have to be a believer. This unwavering belief happens to be the law of the mind.

You have to believe in belief itself!

I will assist in being the captain of their ship in their early years of life, helping them navigate their conscious mind with the understanding that their young subconscious minds will take and accept as true what they confirm in their ‘I am” answers before falling asleep.

A ‘sick day’ from school day for us here, 4 years ago now.
Enjoying the entertainment at Sydney’s beautiful Luna Park.
I never let schooling interfere with my or my family’s education.

Simple is uncomplicating Beauty.

I am”: a very simple, yet powerful affirmation of nobody else but – ‘you’. An affirmation of the communication from your conscious mind to your subconscious mind. It is simple, yet complex … and Un-complicating of Real Beauty.

A prayer. Repeated.

Beauty comes in the human form.
It is a living masterpiece.
On display, from a masterful poser/artist, the human body exemplifies beauty and truth rolled in to vibrating ball of flow of muscle.
The hard part is to CREATE beauty. We all have the ability within us.
To create a beauty through the human form is genius.
Providing the scaffolding for your childs(ren) character building towards a ‘beautiful character’ is like sculpturing a great physique.
Everything matters, however, small it is.
GIGO for their minds:
If you want to create champions and leaders , feed them daily champion & leadership thoughts.

Try it, see how you feel after a month.

Try this game with your kids and see if it helps with their sleeping. Try it for a month. The main benefit however, is in the strengthening of the mind. Just like building good quality muscles you have got to be persistent and consistent with daily application of the relevant principles.

You could even try it with older kids (adults) too. Maybe even you. Just change the affirmation questions and find a quiet time and place (preferably just before falling asleep) and create a better you.

Create a better life from within starting with “I am”.

The old Cap’n Viking Pirate.
Me, a Simple-complex Man.

Remember: you reap (your destiny) what your sow (your seeds of thought).

 

Until next time,

Cheers & Ahoy!!

 

The Old Cap’n Viking Pirate … & thoughts and words on belief, subconscious mind and I am.

The Brain 🧠.
The mind.
I AM.

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Every great building structure has a great foundation.

Relaxed.

Relaxed.

Every great sporting team has a great foundation – they do the basics, well. Not some of the time – all the time.

Every good professional, say, an Accountant, understands the basics of the Accrual Accounting System and applies the principles consistently. Always. This allows for complete, timely, accurate, reliable data that when analysed with other information (past and present) allows for better decision making. For the future.

This helps build a great business.

In all of my body re-engineering programs, tailored for all individuals, I stress the importance of building a good foundation, encompassed in the first “A” of my “Triple A” to Life philosophy of self-development. The ‘A” I am referring to is: AWARENESS.

I stick to the basics and get my pupils to perform them properly all the time. Most of them do. Old school training with a modern twist.

In this phase of my life, I spend a lot more time with my two kids now then I used to. I feel very fortunate that I have the opportunity to share these years these formative years with them. To help them and funnily enough, they help me a lot too.

They help increase my awareness. Of myself. Of them. And of the external environment.

This increased awareness (thanks partly to them), has got me thinking about the importance of laying a great foundation for them. Just like a great building. To help them build the loftiest buildings in the universe: their young minds and hearts, which are learning at super-speed, trying to make sense of their lives and learning how to make this world a better place in which to live.

This, I believe is the most important foundation each and every dad out there can help lay in their children: to build the greatest building (positive influence) in their hearts and minds and trying to make the world a better place.

Part of this laying of the foundation for them is to give them a clear understanding of one of the all-time great truths: that life is difficult and often unfair. Whether we like it or not, our sons and daughters may experience doubts, discouragement, loneliness, disappointment. Failure. They may be betrayed by a friend, not succeed in getting in to the university or profession of choice. Be dumped by their girlfriend or boyfriend.

Become aware, take actions (relevant & sufficient); adapt accordingly

Just like you, I know I will feel the hurt in their hearts too …

But this is all part of building a great foundation. You see, as I see it, we should not go out of our way to look for pain but we should certainly avoid pain when we can (with one exception when you’re in the gym feeling the ‘pump’ in your working muscles).

We should not just explain away moments like these – these trials and tribulations they may likely experience. They are an essential part of foundation building for a great building that they will call ‘their life’. These trials represents the capacity to build strength, maturity, courage and genuine, authentic love. It builds perseverance and resilience.

My role as a parent is relatively new. I am still learning. I know one thing, though is that as a parent, the better we get at seeing our children through these difficult times, through these trials, the better the bond. These trials will help us identify what they can do in our lives and our children’s lives, the better able we’ll be to provide stability, calmness, assurance and genuine love to our children. Even in the midst of a storm. Their trying times.

As a parent I know I have made mistakes along the way, so far. But I embrace the role with all my heart, mind and soul. Every experienced parent understands that bad behaviour in a child rarely happens with no previous signals, incidents. There are usually early signs. We just have to be aware.

I still remember hearing my grandfather say to my grandmother when referring to a relative of mine when I was a child, “be careful, you give him an inch, he’ll take a mile”.

So true, when you’re a parent.

As a parent you need to stay alert. You’re forced to increase awareness. To notice behavioural changes early and be ready to intervene in time to prevent the youngster from skidding in to serious dangerous waters ….

It is essentially ‘risk management’ and depending on the incident, an appropriate assessment of the behaviour needs to be made as to the short-term and long-term risks. Appropriate ‘intervention controls’ need to be implemented to mitigate the likely consequences likely to happen if not addressed.

Simple? Not quiet. But you have to try as a parent.

I believe, a parent’s wisdom in controlling their youngster(s) is one of the best measures of how much you really love and value her or him. The child knows this whether they say anything or not. I know my daughter does. The young boy or girl understands that his or her mother should have a hand in controlling her too. Matter of fact, both parents need to play this role – in equal share.

Children learn so much from their parents. I have found that I needed to improve my own personal standards when my children appears on the scene. Your personal examples are important and so are your rules. My wife and I have established a few rules already in our household. I get caught out sometimes, when my daughter notices ‘double standards’ in what I tell them to do and what I do. For example, I always say that a shirt has to be worn whenever we are seated at the table for a meal.

True?

Sometimes … I get reminded by her. “Dad, aren’t you forgetting something?”

“And what would that be, young lady?” I would reply.

“Your shirt”, she would state matter-of-factly.

This little point makes me think of the bigger message. The message is that – you won’t be able to sell your children any double standards on the important issues in life.

And you shouldn’t.

I have concluded that they will most likely follow what I DO and what I BELIEVE than what I SAY ABOUT these issues.

Stop trying to be the BEST DAD in the world. Be the best dad you CAN BE. Be YOURSELF. That is all your daughter or son NEEDS: the REAL YOU.

Their REAL FATHER.

You see your children does not need to believe that you are the wisest man in the world or the strongest, to count you as their father. No.

I believe that the REAL FATHER they NEED is a MAN who they can approach for answers on the important questions in life. They also need to see that you are still a ‘work-in-progress’ but that you still have the hunger to learn and grow too.

That you make mistakes too. And its ok.

They need to see that you are not narrow-minded and ‘set in your ways’. They NEED to see that you are not afraid to learn and embrace new ideas, new concepts, new paradigms, new philosophies.

Summed up in my “third A” to my “Triple A to Life”:

Adaptability.

Be the best parent you can be.

Until next time,

 

Be YOU. Never imitate.

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The Fire Within.

B&W3346

Life is short. We all agree on this.

Life is also complex. One of the skills is to make this complexity a little less complex. Simplify the complex. De-clutter. Simplify life. Most of us would agree on this too.

Life is also an exercise in Risk Management. Anyone that thinks otherwise needs to put their thinking hat on for a few minutes. Look back at your life. Look at your life so far to this point. Look at all the decisions you have made either consciously or subconsciously to minimise your life risks. How many?

Many.

I believe one category with high risk to a growing number of human beings today, partly because of the increasing levels of obesity is cardiovascular disease and other stress-related disorders.

As I see it, it is not enough to just eat the right foods and keep cholesterol levels low. It is also not enough to exercise regularly, not enough still, to take regular holidays to ‘get away from it all’.

Nope, not enough.

How can we lower that moderate to high risk of cardiovascular and stress-related diseases? As I see it, to protect ourselves and lower these real Life Risks, we must learn to ‘switch-off’. Like I tell most of my apprentices in the gym and in life, we need to learn to “quiet the mind.

Easier said than done.

We need to learn how to ‘turn off our engines’ in order to lengthen the effective useful life of our time on this planet. What I mean by this is that we need to switch off our production of the “Fire within”. What Fire Within, you may be asking?

You see, we are many things. One thing I know is that we are not in control of ourselves as much as we think we are. We are hormonal creatures. Because of this, the Fire Within is a term I use for the production of the hormone – “adrenaline”. I also refer to this as the “Energy Hormone”. The hormone that gives you that sense of Vitality. The hormone that is triggered whenever we a faced with a ‘flight or fight’ response to a threat. That fire within needs to be turned off, when no longer needed.

This hormone, this Fire Within needs to be tamed. To be controlled. Better. Many people need to learn to become less dependent on this energy hormone for their everyday living. As a keen observer of human behaviour, I believe that like many other things people struggle with managing, in life – their diets, their money, their insatiable desire for ‘newness’, their constant dis-satisfaction with the old etc, many people do not know how to ‘switch off’ this vital hormone – the giver of vitality or life and also – THE TAKER!

Not turning the Fire Within OFF, allows emotions such as anger, frustration, irritation, challenge and excitement trigger this energy hormone: adrenaline. I see many people incapable of managing these psychological triggers of this deadly hormone. Incapable of bringing this hormone under control. They let these emotions get the better of them.

Effective stress management is what is needed. Some rules of the brain to consider –

Step 1: Quiet the Mind.

Step 2: Repeat to Remember.

Step 3: Remember to Repeat.

Effective stress management requires that we be healthy in mind and spirit, not just in our physical bodies. What I am talking about here when I refer to effective stress management, it is to “quiet the mind …. And spirit”. This is what will truly allow you to manage one of your life’s greatest risks: adrenalin mis-management.

Eating well and exercising is not enough.

Many individuals seek adrenalin ‘highs’ and seek increasing levels of excitement and joy to enjoy the thrill of challenge. They never seem to get enough. Constantly seeking more and more different ways to experience the adrenalin rush. I believe these people may find it much more difficult to manage adrenalin which could likely increase their life risks.

Ask yourself: are you one of these types of people?

Like any surfer would know, you cannot keep riding the peak of the wave forever as there will always be a trough. A low point. Adrenaline “junkies” need to train and re-train themselves to experience life without the constant novel stimulation. They need to come down from the “mountain-tops” and enjoy the peace and calmness of the valley. This is where true rest and recuperation/re-charging and healing can occur.

Please do.

Your life depends on it more than you think. Turn off the Fire Within.

The hustle and bustle and frantic pace of modern living does not allow us the luxury of natural recovery. We are robbed of it. This comes at a cost: an ever-increasing state of mental diseases or stress-related diseases. A costly price to pay for not managing the energy hormone, better.

Because of this theft brought on us by modern-day living, we find ourselves planning these ‘vacations or holidays’ in to our lives, through deliberate design. But, you cannot escape YOU – you cannot run away from your mind.

Even Jesus Christ, the greatest psychologist that ever lived, thought it was very important, too. Rest, that is. There is a passage in the bible where he did request of his disciples to follow him to a quiet place and get some rest (somewhere in Mark gospel, I think).

Think about it: Jesus Christ thought it was necessary all those years ago.

Now, from a Christian – religious point-of-view, if Jesus Christ thought it was necessary for him and his disciples to periodically get some rest, then, who are we to think we can exist without it?

Practice switching off the Fire Within before the flames burn out your life before your time.

Pour some water to put out those flames. From time to time.

Don’t just treat the symptom (vacations/holidays). Focus on treating the cause: Quietening your mind. And spirit.

Longer, better quality life to you.

 

Until next time,

Paul V2 (1)

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Why Not?

Relaxed.

Relaxed.

I love my children.

I love spending as much time as I can with each of them – Olivia and Zachary. I am very fortunate that in this phase of my life I am able to do just that.

Give them my time – my life. Just like other dads do, too.

Olivia, Zachary and I love doing many activities together. Building things using leggos is one such activity.  My son teams up with me and we construct, bust down, re-build and re-construct the best castles we can dream up with the limited pieces of leggo pieces we have. Olivia is a champion builder now. Better than me already. They both are. She’s so good, that her constructions are very elaborate and above all – ‘stable’. That’s her thing – it has to be stable.

“Dad, she says, a castle is better to be stable than just pretty, aye dad?”

“Uhumm … yep, to some extent, that is true. You don’t want strong winds to blow it away now, do we? Like most important things in life, we need strong foundations. We all need to have our rocks in life.”

I try my best to encourage them to use their imagination and play ‘pretend’ games. Even though there is a limit to how many leggos they have, each time we build, they create something new. No creation is ever the same.

And when run out of leggo pieces, my daughter asks what else. I say lets pretend even more. Olivia gets so excited and so does Zachary. I start it off by saying ..

“Just pretend … that your castle has wings …. Large wings and it can fly …. Fly up in the sky and the wings are so large that the castle can take us all in it .. and …

My daughter interrupts me and then asks “But dad, castles can’t have wings, can they?”

I thought about what she said and I wanted to tell her the truth but I thought that a little un-truth, a little lie would be the best thing for her and her brother right now. I wanted them to continue their ‘make-belief’ world. Heck, if I had one wish I would want their ‘pretend world’ to not come to an end.

Let them run wild and far with their imagination. Keep dreaming. See what they come up with. Encourage them to ‘see’ what others cannot, what I can’t.

With no restraints. No rules. Their world where anything is possible. Where castles have wings … large wings. Enough to carry mum and dad and them away in to the skies. Forever.

I told her that her castle can have wings. Anything she wanted would be given to her. Any power she wanted. Anything she imagined, no matter how ridiculous it may be, would be granted. There were no rules. No one to tell her what could and could not be done. She was the boss. The creator.

Olivia stopped me again and said: “but dad, castles can’t have wings?”

I told her “why not, Olivia. Why can’t Castle’s have wings? I told her not to just ask “Why?” but also consider “Why not?” and then her story-telling of her make-belief world started flying. She imagined all sorts of things. All sorts of possibilities. I was in heaven just listening. Listening to their debates. Their possibilities.

Wow, I enjoy the storytelling my kids share with me!

She didn’t argue with my lie. Only I knew, that I lied. A lie that castles had wings.

But that lie was enough for her to continue her dreaming, her storytelling. Her ‘pretend-world’. I thought telling her a little lie was better than telling her the truth. She will eventually find out the truth but in her time. In her time.

They can find out other little small lies society tells them as they journey through their lives. But, in their time. Things like Santa Clause. Like the Tooth Fairy. Like the Easter Bunny.

These little lies (and there are many in life) are important to every child. Every person who was once a child. It encourages their imagination to run wild. It gets them to question possibilities. It gets them to not just ask “why?” but instead to also ask “why not?”.

Why not? Why not create a castle with wings? Why not travel to the moon? Why not be a better you? Why not make a more fuel-efficient car? Why not choose to eat a healthier meal option just because you respect and love yourself a little bit more today than you did yesterday? Why not go to sleep early tonight and say no to a ‘big night out”? Why not strive to be a better person from this hour forth? Why not make time to go to the gym at least twice a week? Why not take care of your beautiful self better?

Why not, not why?

Look back at your life. The way I see it, it seems that up until six years old, we get lots of encouragement. But by the time we reach our teens, we get discouragement from everyone and everything we experience in life. By the time most of us kids get to working life, young adults appear to have been drained of courage and have lost most of their enthusiasm – that sparkle that allows a person to choose to adopt positive thinking everyday.

Why?

I believe one of the reasons is that not enough of us humans are asking ourselves “why not?”. A lot of people have lost belief in striving for a better life. A better self. They have lost belief in themselves. Enthusiasm and courage has been sucked out of them.

Also, partly because they’ve stopped asking themselves “why not?”

Its not too late people. Its not too late to do something about it. Its not too late to try to lose ten or so kilos. Why not? Its never too late to start dreaming again. Its never too late to start believing in yourself again. Why not try harder? Why not keep going? I’ve seen it with the very old and the young alike. That is the only thing that gives you hope:

Believing in a dream … make it your dream … to believe in the question of telling you and asking yourself the question of “why not” …. Be your BEST you can be – for yourself and … while you’re on a roll, why not be the BEST YOU CAN BE for others too!”.

Don’t wait for the perfect moment when all is safe and assured. It may never arrive. Mountains will not be climbed. Walking on the moon may never have happened.  Don’t allow fear to make you quit. Never quit on life. You’ve got to win over yourself. Never settle for defeat. Never stop striving to being the best you can be, in every sense of the word.

Have you hitched your wagon to a star? Why not?

It seems that there is a philosophical movement that exists that associates drive and initiative solely with materialistic power and gain. There appears to be an ever-growing obsession focused on the accumulation of non-essential personal possessions.

This should not be confused, I think, with personal achievement and the pursuit of individual excellence. Disregarding all material gain, I believe there is a pure personal pleasure which comes from achieving the difficult or the unusual. Whatever it is that it is.

The magic rests in everyone of us. Yes, it rests in you too. The enduring power that has moved you and will move you, again, comes from inside. Yes, inside you.

Success is not just reserved for the talented. It is not in the high I.Q. Not in the gifted birth. Not in the best equipment and technology. Not even in ability.

Success in anything, I believe is hugely dependent upon drive, focus and persistence. The extra energy required to make an extra effort – to go the ‘extra mile’ –  to try another approach – to ask ‘why not” do something a little bit different, a little bit smarter – to concentrate on the desired outcome – is, I believe, the secret to achievement. To win, in your unique journey through life.

The magic is this: ATTITUDE.

A wise man once said: “Its your attitude, not your aptitude that determines your altitude in life”.

Apply. Adapt accordingly.

See how the next four decades pan out for you. Choose well.

And when you start dreaming again, you might as well dream BIG. It takes the same amount of focus!

As another wise person once said: “Make no little plans: they have no magic to stir your blood to action – instead make big plans, aim high in work and hope.”

Ask yourself – “Why not?

 

Until next time,

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Beliefs, body, Energy, habits, Imagination, life, mind, muscles, Strength training, time, truths, Vitality, workout

No belief, no nothing.

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I love stories and storytelling. Do you?

I love listening to stories that people share. Everyone has a story in them. I have heard many stories from the hundreds of people that I have had the opportunity to help over the years. This blog is one such story.

A courageous story of finding the strength within and overcoming fear and the journey towards a better quality life. A few years ago, a member of my gym asked if I could get his wife to come and see me about ‘fixing’ her back. She had been suffering for about 20 years. He was very happy with the success he was getting in one of my programs and he asked me to call his wife as he had failed to persuade her to come see me. I did something a little different. I wrote her a little message on my business card saying “please come in and tell me your story”. I gave her a date and time.

To my surprise she turned up.

Typical of a lot of women, she was a little scared of gyms with a view that it was a place only for men, people who wanted to put on huge muscles and was an unfriendly, male-dominated domain that was not welcoming to women. I knew it was difficult because she had a belief fueled by mis-perceptions.

We sat down and I listened to her story to that point in her life. She had suffered from excruciating back pain and had been in and out of many different professionals for almost 20 years. Visits alleviated pain temporarily but her quality of life had been hampered by the pain and was slowly deteriorating. Her whole family suffered with her too. I discussed my philosophy to training and the framework I would use to help her. I asked her to give me 3 weeks of her life. She needed to see me for half an hour twice a week. A total of 6 visits.

She hesitantly agreed.

She had demonstrated a great deal of courage, just to consider trying something different but also something she truly feared: being in the gym. At this point in her life, she had tried almost everything and nothing was working and she desperately needed a better result. A pain-free existence.

My objective was to help her experience a better quality life, a life without daily back pain and life she could only dream about. I had less than 3 weeks to produce a result. A miracle, but I could not do it without her help. She faced a challenge and I reassured her that we would face it together. The first thing I needed her to do was to stop naming and talking about her pain. This would stop giving them power over her – sucking away at her life through her attention and fear of them.

I got her to imagine the end result (pain-free existence) and feel its reality. I needed her to change her belief and managed to convince her that “according to your belief, is it done unto you”. I then got her to tie this new belief mentally and emotionally within her being. With this renewed belief in herself, my program and me, we went to work. She got to do things that she had been advised not to do for almost two decades.

Let me give you an example: She was afraid to bend and reach for her toes and had the belief that it would make her back problem worse. She did things in the gym with me in her first week that she had feared. By the end of the second week, she told me that the pain in her back was gone. I expected it but not that soon. In the third week, her two teenage children attending university came in to the gym to personally thank me for what I was doing with their mum. It was the first time in their lives that they did not hear their mum complain of her back being sore. They had seen and heard her suffer in pain all their life. Every single day!

I was touched.

I told them the real miracle was that their mum was prepared to do the things she was afraid to do. The healing power was brought about by a changed mental attitude. She essentially cured herself with a little help from me. As I had been there before, I was only a tour-guide but she did the work and journey all on her own. The real courage she demonstrated was the open-mindedness and flexibility to adopt a new way of thinking and acting. That was my true challenge, not the weight-training part.

To cut a long story short, this lady who was afraid of even bending down to just touch her ankles went on to not only do it but she also ended up being the strongest woman in my gym. She dead-lifted 140kgs for 6 reps on a good day. And she was in her mid-50s with no prior training experience. She remained pain-free for the entire time she trained with me – over two years! She got her life back. Her quality of life improved greatly.

When I think back about her miraculous transformation, I knew from the time I first met her that she was a naturally strong woman but she had lost her faith in herself. Her belief in her own inner-strength. This is an example of the many little miracles that I have seen people produce, in their own little way. In their lives – changing their lives and changing the lives of others. Just like the many others, she was empowered. She was back in control.

The law of life is belief.

All religions of the world represent forms of belief and these beliefs are explained in many ways. This client of mine went from thinking why she was getting certain results to asking herself how she was creating the pain she was experiencing in her life. She tried to understand how her beliefs and philosophy generated what happened in her life and to cease to continue believing what did not serve her. I got her to shift her focus consciously and intentionally to what she did want (pain-free back).

She did it.

You too, can achieve your own miracles. Little miracles happen everyday and its all around us. What you focus on is the KEY to everything! For any outcome, whether internal or external, there’s a certain way of thinking and acting that will get it for you. Its like weight-training, if you want strength, you need to train a certain way, if power is goal, then a different way of training is necessary to achieve the goal desired. There is a different path for different goals.

Your task is to find this new way of Thinking and Acting. You then have to be flexible enough to adopt the way of thinking and acting that will get you there. Finding that new way is the easy part. The difficult part is the applying and adapting.

My tip to you: watch “inside” to manage “outside”. There is a saying that goes “it is done unto you as you believe”. What do you believe about yourself, life and the universe? What is the belief of your mind or put simply, what is the thought of your mind?

All your experiences, all your actions, and all events and circumstances of your life are but the reflections and reactions to your own thought in your thought factory.

Watch your thoughts!  

Until next time,

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ageing, body, Energy, life, mind, muscles, needs, Strength training, time, Vitality, you

My meditation hour

We all need to relax. True.

Some people, some cultures, some countries do it better than others, just like there are some animals that do it better too. We all need to relax. That much is true.

And physical relaxation is important but I think it is second to mental relaxation. A relaxed mind is a relaxed body.  Not necessarily the other way round. You see it when you watch elite sportsperson in competition and you hear them talk about their mental state being the difference between winning and not. The mind is intricately connected to the body, you all know that.

What I mean is that mental relaxation and peace of mind is one of the most important ways each and every one of us need in our lives to truly relax because it helps boost our sense of vitality. The quantity of hours of sleep is not as important as the quality of sleep but sleep in and of itself is not enough to attaining a relaxed mental state. Your mind being at rest. A quiet mind. You know the type, the people who sleep more than the recommended 8 hours a day and still seem more restless when they wake. They probably have not quietened their mind, not truly allowed their minds to rest. Slowed their minds.

It is a need, not a want. Remember this.

Everyone is searching for that something, that medium that would allow them to feel relaxed. Some go to a church or mosque, some do yoga, meditation classes, some surf, do gardening or fish. Some turn to alcohol, some to drugs. Some go to the other side of the world in search of a way, of a magical drug to find a way to calm, to rest, to slow their minds. Some find it, most never do.

What if I said that you don’t have to look very far. What if I told you that the essence of meditation can be had in the gym. Yes, your gym down the road.

Apart from all the physical goals you set yourself to achieve by visiting the gym, the most important benefit – NOW, to you is the intangible benefits of mental rest and relaxation. How is that so, you say? Well, I don’t think everyone has the required skill level to truly absorb the full benefits to the mind that working out with weights gives. However, it can be learned just like anything else, with patience and a good teacher.

How do you define a workout? Some of you may say words like “lifting weights, with reps; intensity; hard work, lots of sweating etc ..” All good.

I define a workout as a “continuous progression of 15 to 45 second FOCUSED MOMENTS”.

Now, here’s the thing – what are these ’15 to 45 second focused moments?’ Well, they’re simply what every gym goer calls a ‘set’. A number of sets of exercises comprise a workout. I refer to a set as a ‘focused moment’. Now, how does this allow my mind to relax?

Well, think about it for a second … if you really focus for the 15 to 45 seconds and become one with the weight and perform the set, your mind will be thinking of nothing else but getting through each repetition. All other thoughts are blocked out of your mind just for those focused seconds. Don’t let anything or anyone distract you for those seconds. If you add up all those 15 to 45 seconds for the duration of your workout, you would probably get 30 minutes of ‘quiet time’ or totally ‘relaxed mind’ for that period of time.

Now that is food for the mind.

Each workout is my meditation hour. Make it yours too. I have anywhere between 3 and 5 workouts a week. So that means I get 3 to 5 meditation hours every week. Do you get yours? Do you get to rest your mind through your body? Do you give it the respect it needs? What you get out of it depends on how much effort you put in to it, how well you focus. Learn proper exercise/meditation technique and practise, practise, practise. Set after set after set.

If you don’t already visit a gym, do so and try it. Try this meditation technique. Even if you don’t get it the first few times around, you’re still going to benefit from increased muscle size.

Its a WIN-WIN for you!

See if you feel the essence of your workouts.

Until next time,

 

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awareness, basics of training, better choices, body, Body shape, caring, change, change management, choices, Energy, examined life, Fitness, fundamentals, game of life, Goals, gratitude, habit, habits, hope, life, long-term perspective, love, mind, mind-muscle connection, muscle building, muscles, needs, patience, perseverance, perspective, responsibility, self improvement, self love, self-image, self-respect, Strength training, strengths, truth, Vitality, workout, you, your life

How Fit and Healthy are you?

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Definition of Total Fitness

There is no standard definition of physical fitness.

It means different things to different people. Decide on your own definition but be mindful of your activity. Fitness is relative to the activity performed and not all activities require similar fitness.

For example, someone who is playing as a goalkeeper in soccer may not necessarily be fit for hockey and the fitness for running a marathon may not translate to the fitness for playing rugby.

I believe it is more appropriate to promote a broader definition of total fitness that should comprise of the following 5 elements:

  1. Strength and the development of lean body mass (muscle).
  2. Flexibility
  3. Cardiovascular conditioning
  4. Ease of general daily activities
  5. Exercise-FREE factors

Elements 1 to 3 is quite self-explanatory but lets talk about 4 and 5.

With element 4, if you go about your daily activities without an ache or pain in the world, then, you must be doing something right with your life. Stop and spare a thought for the millions of people in the world that are not as lucky as you to just jump out of bed bursting with the vitality of a hundred people.

There is a definite ‘mind-muscle’ connection. Train your muscles to train & exercise your brain and help it release all those necessary life-affirming hormones to flood your body … needed nutrition for the cells and soul. Try it.

Consider starting a Fitness Program tailored to you

Many humans struggle just to get through their daily activities, like getting out of bed, doing their shopping etc without some form of pain or discomfort. Some could not get through their day without resorting to more than a handful of drugs.

Not nice. Not the way they had envisioned of living, I suppose.

With element five, this includes variables that make up your lifestyle such as healthy nutrition (for the body and mind), no drug abuse, adequate rest and recuperation (sleep), adequate exposure to sunshine (but don’t get sun-burned), good posture, healthy and fulfilling relationships and an enjoyable and satisfying employment.

Now, for people who make their living being a sportsperson, being talented is not enough. They each need to ensure they hone their skills specific to their sport to be the best they can be to be totally fit for that activity.

However, if you’re thinking of starting a fitness program. Great for you! Consider the elements I have listed when you think about getting ‘fit’. All these elements should be factored in to your program for self improvement before, I believe, anyone can really be said to be healthy and fit.

I have seen them, so perhaps have you, people that are strong and well-built but physically unfit and cannot even run up a small flight of stairs without difficulty. Just all show and some suffer from a world-wide epidemic, very evident on beaches – mostly men who suffer from what I have termed “ILS” or “imaginary lats – syndrome”.

Yep, you’ve seen them! Then you have people who are extremely fit physically and yet not be healthy (very long-distance runners could arguably fall in this boat).

What is your definition of health, strength and fitness? Does it include your TOTAL self – physical, mental, spiritual, emotional, intellectual, socially?

What is “Fit” to you?

What is ‘Fit” to you?

There is a prevailing mis-perception about what people consider to be ‘fit’ in society as it most probably does not include the 5 elements I have highlighted above. Although it is highly desirable to be physically fit, please bear in mind that there is so much more to total fitness (and health) than just that.

Now, if you’re brave enough to ‘get off the fence’ and help yourself with your physical goals in life and if you’re lucky enough to seek and get help, just do it! (I just love this NIKE slogan). If you feel you want to go about it on your own then consider mapping out a time-frame for your body transformation journey, say a 16-week (4 month) goal with realistic but specific goals.

Obviously, don’t be too ambitious in the early days. Don’t be disappointed if you can’t achieve instantaneous results. Like I have said before, learn patience and persistence.

Take stock of your physical health so far and remember you have had your body since you were born. You have possibly misused it for many, many years.

You have a lot of mending to do, so getting fit won’t happen overnight, but it WILL happen if you TRY.

Be the most UN-Common Man/Woman you can be.
Find the Real YOU and … be YOU

Health, good health is the sum of many parts

Health, good health is the sum of many parts, including how you think, what you eat, read and drink, how you see your body, how you plan your daily activities and how you perform them and how you get on with your internal and external environment.

Like I have said in an earlier blog, you are like a juggler with many balls in the air. If you drop one, that’s fine. Keep going, the others will take up the slack. And then tomorrow, start again with all the balls.

Take a day off occasionally. On those days, sit down for a few minutes and think how you could make your routine more enjoyable.

Notice, I said more enjoyable – NOT EASIER..

Stay focused!

Until next time,

 

Cheers & Ahoy!

The old Cap’n Viking Pirate Evangelist Muscled Monk … & How fit and healthy are you

Side triceps pose. Contest: Australian Natural Bodybuilding Titles. Placing: 2nd.

Side triceps pose.
Contest: Australian Natural Bodybuilding Titles.
Placing: 2nd.

 

Always maintain discipline in all areas of life, at all times, under all conditions … like a great Viking or Pirate of the Seas do.
Become the best Captain of the Seas of Life you can be. …
Cheers & Ahoy!
The old Cap’n Viking Pirate Evangelist Muscled Monk

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