Tag Archives: a better life

a better life, action, adaptation, ageing, asking questions, attitude, awareness, balance, beauty, better choices, change, Change Agent, chaos, choices, compassion, consciousness, dads, eternity, examined life, game of life, strengths

Simplify to Amplify.

You learn from children and then learn from us.
It is a two-way learning experience, not one way (parents to children like some people think)

Time will tell

I love being a dad.

I love being a father to my two children. Every day I am grateful for the blessing my wife gave when she chose to bring them in to this world.

Having children is a true blessing. I’m sure all dads reading this would agree.

I love being with my children – doing every single thing with them. I just feel I want to spend every single minute of my life with them. I truly thank my intelligent, strong, caring, loving wife for the opportunity to spend a big chunk of this phase of their lives with them.

It is truly a blessing I experience that not many dads out there have the opportunity to do so. They have learned a lot from me and I have learned many things from them already.

I love observing them, you can learn so much (I’m sure a lot of dads and mums love this too). Even in the first 2 to 3 years of their lives, I can tell how distinctly different they are to one another. They are poles apart in certain things and activities they choose to participate in.

For example, Zachary makes it very clear that he does not enjoy colouring or drawing, whereas Olivia has an obvious talent in this area. They have obvious inclinations towards certain activities. They tell us what they are interested in and we can certainly observe this through they repeated behaviour.

These are the traits that need to be developed, traits/strengths that need to be amplified to bring the best out of each child, each person. In simple terms, we need to simplify to amplify.

Time will tell.

Time will tell what truth our children search for

Know YOU – build on your strengths and appreciate your uniqueness

Zachary loves solving puzzles – particularly electronic gadgets or mechanical tools. Zachary had shown a much higher level of patience in the solving of shapes and puzzles than Olivia did at the same age.

It’s just his thing.

Pulling things apart and putting it back together again. He’s always asking the question ‘why?’ and he is very strategic. Already out-thinks me on occasion and he is only three and half years old. He would certainly keep my neurons stimulated as he grows with his strategic constructive debates.

I’ve always believed that due to our short time on earth, we need to firstly identify our strengths and work towards enhancing these through focused and deliberate practise for our future and for the betterment of man-kind.

It’s better use of our 86,400 seconds that we have every day.

Essentially, you need to know You – build on your strengths and appreciate your uniqueness just like my children demonstrate from such a young age. Despite being born from the same genetic blueprint, they differ in so many ways.

Dogs are truly one of man’s best friends

Why work on your weaknesses?

From when we were kids, the school system seemed to encourage the opposite: emphasising our weaknesses and telling us that we need to ‘work on our weaknesses’. Millions of people seem to be spending a lot of time ‘working on their weaknesses’ from the cradle to their grave.

What a waste of time and life!

Overcoming deficits or weaknesses is an essential part of the fabric of our culture, of our society, isn’t it? But why work on your weaknesses?

I mean everywhere we go, we hear stories, see movies, read books about the lotto winner or the underdog who beats one – in – hundred million odds.

It’s everywhere and that is one of the primary reasons gambling is so popular because each and every one of us have been brain-washed in to believing we have great chances of winning even though we may not have the natural ability to win.

However, every day we are bombarded with these stories and we get a deluded sense of the truth. It seems that we tend to celebrate those who triumph over their lack of natural ability much, much more than we celebrate those who capitalize on their innate talents. It certainly makes for ideal TV shows ratings and sells newspapers too.

Champions practise a lot of visualisation and simulation.
To create magic, you need to fuse the worlds of sanity (where you are) with insanity (where you dream/imagine you are, before you are).
That is difficult.
That is one of the key keys.
Don’t stop. Trying. Believing.
Keep on … keeping on. You’ll get there. Everyone always does.
Especially, if you do it with your heart. and ….
with LOVE.

Taking the path of most resistance

As a result of this over-inflated, deluded view of an aspect of success, we have millions of people that chase goals that are impossible. They see these, say, over-night multi-millionaires as THEIR HEROES and the epitome’ of success and so set their sights on conquering major challenges.

Unfortunately for them, this is taking the path of most resistance!

I mean in recent years we’ve all witnessed many examples of these poor souls embarrass themselves on the top reality tv shows looking for talent. How awful is this? I mean I couldn’t understand how people with no talent whatsoever are permitted to get on national tv and perform and get laughed at? It is great for TV show ratings and advertising dollars for the network but isn’t this degrading to the person?

It’s the same for certain sports or careers, it isn’t very difficult to observe that a teaching a fish how to climb a tree like a monkey will always result in disappointment. The fish will never be able to do what a monkey naturally does best and vice versa. A monkey will not be able to swim as well or as fast as a fish in the water. Each individual or animal needs to find the right environment to strive and perform at it’s best.

working to my strengths helped me be one of the best in the world at my chosen sport.
I could not have made it that far in say … basketball. Height is a genetic weakness.
Being strong with lots of power are strengths that when developed helps you achieve your truth.
Your beauty.

Know the difference between positive thinking and delusional thinking

These aspiring contestants then get asked to leave by the judges because, well, they simply suc$ed at it! Then the contestant breaks down and cries. The producers of these shows have milked this sob-story so well and I think most people have had enough of seeing these tear-jerkers.

I used to ask my wife where that poor person’s friends were? Isn’t that a role of a good friend – to tell him/her know how awful he/she is at the particular skill before getting on national tv to get humiliated.

The sad thing is that these contestants actually believe they sound ok. They actually believe that with an opportunity and working hard and getting a tutor, they would somehow miraculously be as good as their idols or as the judges. That to achieve success, it is only and all about hard work. And everyone – the whole audience and viewership seem to believe this too. Now, you could call this type of thinking ‘positive thinking’ but I think it more closer to ‘delusional thinking’.

You should know and understand the difference between positive thinking and delusional thinking. I think many in society believe and practise the latter, unfortunately.

Society does not seem to give credit to innate talent – and that applies to everything in life – in athletic ability, music ability, mechanical ability, spatial ability, emotional ability, spiritual ability etc. Hard work is important to success, yes – but its not the only important thing. Innate ability (or talent) is very important too.

Your life is a continous journey of setting, failing and succeeding in goals … until you … kick the bucket! Keep moving forward, I say!

A person can only perform from a platform of strength

I believe one of the most important responsibilities of parents is to observe and identify the talents and strengths that their children have. This can be done in the very early stages/years of their lives. It will save a lot of heart-ache and pain later in life – in the later teens and early twenties.

It seems that even though we change over time and personalities adapt, scientists have discovered that core personality traits are relatively stable throughout adulthood, as are our perceptions and interests. Even more interesting is that recent studies also show that a child’s observed personality at age 3 is very similar to his or her personality traits reported at age 26.

So, just being more aware as a parent and spending time with your children and really observing them would tell you a lot about their talents. This increased awareness would help give you some idea in the direction they may be more inclined to succeed in their adult lives.

Afterall, a famous management guru said once that a person can only perform from a platform of strength.

A plant of such beauty and delicateness has to have the right environment and conditions to flourish.
You and your strengths need the right environment and conditions to flourish.
FInd yours.

Learn to build on who you already are

Think about you, your life so far.

Are you doing a job that utilizes ALL your strengths? Are you fully utilizing your talents? Or are you doing something that your parents and/or family and friends expected you to do? I’ve seen and heard so many stories about kids entering University and realising they didn’t love Law, for example (which their parents or family expected them to do) was not what they were really good at. They then go back and do another degree or two before discovering their true strengths. Their true love.

They’re still one of the lucky ones.

Are you just doing your current job in a ‘half-hearted attempt’ – doing just enough to get through and not really ‘setting the world on fire?’ Well, are you? Don’t fret, you’re not alone. Apparently, a huge percentage of the world’s population never, ever get to reach their potential because they are not doing a job or work that utilizes their strengths.

Very sad indeed.

Very sad because you only have one life and you are doing something that would not bring your closer to your full potential. Not through the fault of our own but through generations of mis-direction and philosophy partly through the education system. Everyone is brain-washed to believing that they have got to spend all their lives working on ‘their weaknesses’.

One of the keys to human development and/or self-development is building on who you already are.

me in one of the environments where I am at my best and strive to be my best and have the necessary strengths to excel at this. FInd yours.

Journey of self-discovery

To do this, you need to increase your awareness of yourself. You need to be who you are.

But, who are YOU?

Within this journey of self-discovery, I am positive you will find the real strengths that lie within you (if you haven’t already done so).

Identifying your talents and developing them in to real strengths and aligning yourself with the right task is vital to reaching your potential in your life. By putting most of your energy into developing your natural talents, it would seem that extraordinary room for growth exists.

Continuously helping you become the best you can be … BEGIN help by helping yourself.
Then,
Reach out and touch someone … be the light for someone who can only see darkness.
Help them see ‘beauty’ .. see their truth.
Help them manage their insanity with sanity … their chaos with order.
Pray.

Two main conditions for success

I’ve said this before that the two main conditions for success in any sort of work are:

  1. Interest
  2. Confidence

People usually give little attention to these two very important variables because it seems it is very difficult to increase levels of both of these simply by an ACT OF WILL.

I think that is true, you cannot increase confidence by simply WILLING yourself to be. Just as much as you cannot increase your size of your muscles by sitting on your couch and willing it to grow!

This does not mean that it is impossible to change your muscular strength for example. If you lifted weights for repetition and gave your muscles the building blocks of muscle nutrition, you would increase your muscle density.

However, your ability to build muscle is limited to your genetic potential also. So, it seems that confidence and interest can be changed by taking the proper measures and having a step-by-step structured approach to developing these qualities in a certain area.

Important fact: People tend to show a greater degree of intelligence and knowledge in connection with their hobbies than in any other department of life.

You have only one life, so use your available time well.

True Leaders develop Leaders.
Here we have former Australian Rugby Wallaby Captain – Mr Phil Waugh, allowing himself to be led and coached to help him, help himself … find his best self.
Leaders have belief, they have faith but most importantly … they have hope.
That tomorrow will be better than today.

Each to their own

Work on your strengths and pay someone else to work on areas that you are relatively weak at. As a past client of mine use to always say ( he was a board member of several publicly listed companies in Australian and NZ) “each to their own!”. His wife (who I used to train too – for almost 6 years, used to make fun of him and how bad her husband was at using a hammer or tools like that).

He used to always remind me that it was better use of my time to focus on my strengths, saying “Focus on your strengths, son. Focus on your strengths!” and “ each to their own … “.

I agree.

His strength was in numbers and interpretation and story-telling of numbers. He recognised this early and worked and built on his strengths and became the success that he is today.

It is very difficult though, to find your true strengths.

working on what you can’t see is somethimes more important than wha tyou can.
Intuition and ‘feel’ is, I believe more important and more powerful thatn intelligence.
Then, you are ín tune’with the universe

Have Focus

Some people are lucky enough and find their purpose – ie., a cure for cancer or paint pictures. This ONE THING matters to them above all else – above comfort, wealth, respectability, safety, family ties or social obligations.

They have FOCUS.

Very few people are this fortunate and this clear cut in their goals in life, after becoming aware of their strengths very early on. Most men and women, I believe, are prepared to fit in, more or less, with the customs they find around them. To work at any job by which they can earn a reasonable living.

I’ve always asked myself that question – why is this so?

It also seems that there are probably some people who fall between these two stools I have mentioned above. These people (if they utilized and worked on their strengths) could be happier and have more growth and reach their potential in life with great certainty in a vocation that uses these traits.

However, it seems that they may fear or have the lack of self-knowledge or the courage or determination needed to break away from the life which other people expect them to lead.

Read that last sentence again: they are …. Afraid to break away from the life which other people expect them to lead. Afraid to do the work that nature designed them. I believe that maybe, in a perfect world, they would be encouraged to do such work.

Ask yourself: to which type of person do you belong?

Attitude is key at winning in the Game of Life.

Fear of Failure

I think the biggest FEAR that is holding people back is not FEAR OF FAILURE. No, it is really FEAR OF CRITICISM/RIDICULE from family and friends for the decision to pursue something career/vocation that they least expected you to do.

This FEAR OF NOT MEETING OTHER’S EXPECTATIONS OF YOU is what keeps people from taking a risk and believing in their own abilities/talents and working towards developing those.

It is very difficult. It has always been.

This is how it has been for the majority since the beginning of time. So, stop working on your weaknesses, and encourage your children to spend time and effort on their strengths. Strengths that you can quite easily observe while you spend time with them.

Reach for your potential through the development of your strengths. Spend more time on them, not your deficits. You’re a complex individual – every human being is. Raise your awareness of yourself and filter down to your top three to five strengths.

Simplify yourself – simplify YOU. Simplify the complex YOU.

Find out WHAT WORKS BEST.

Then, work hard at making these strengths the BEST. Make what works best for YOU, THE BEST. This is amplifying your strengths.

So, it follows that to achieve your potential, you need to SIMPLIFY TO AMPLIFY.

Have no fear.

Remember: No risk, no nothing (with positive thinking – not delusion thinking).

Choose well.

Until next time,

Explaining the fine points of re-engineering the physique and increased self-awareness through enhanced ‘mind-muscle’ connection..

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awareness, belief systems, Beliefs, change

I.Am.Nothing.

Retired Ex-Australian Wallaby & Waratah's Captain - Phil Waugh doing triceps press-downs and "feeling the essence" with perfectly performed repetitions. A great example of a human being striving to be the BEST he can be - for himself, first and then, everyone else. All day. Every day.

Retired Legend of Rugby, Ex-Australian Wallaby & Waratah’s Captain – Phil Waugh doing triceps press-downs and “feeling the essence” with perfectly performed repetitions.
A great example of a human always striving to be the BEST he can be – for himself, first and then, everyone else. All day. Every day.

I.AM
Do you believe in miracles?

I do.

You see, just today a very good friend of mine from my undergraduate university days (over 20 years now) sent me a message saying that the suggestion I gave him with regards to playing the “I am” game worked. I shared with him the game I thought up to help my children sleep at night. It works for my children and I did ’not see why it would not work with his.

Well, he just wanted to say that it has worked with his son and he shared his gratitude with me. However, he asked me a question followed by an enlightened question. The question was “Paul, is there more to the I AM statement than what I am telling him? He was beginning to realise that “I Am” is a different entity/thing. He asked me the question “what is it?”

Now, I told him that there was no other use for the game other than what I mentioned in my earlier blog on “I am”. However, it got me thinking about whether there really is an “I” in I Am.

Have no doubt.
Help yourself first.
You are more than just YOU…
God will meet you half way …
he ALWAYS does.
All you ahve to do is: BELIEVE.


connection is a “contact “ sport
You see, I have always believed that we are like mini-human-phones/computers all connected to a larger power-source (the universe force-field). Some people have stronger connections to this universe than others. connection or connecting is a contact sport. 

The weaker the ‘connection’, the more you suffer in life. Your beliefs and belief system has a lot to do with a lot of your physical suffering.

I have always believed that “Your body does not lie”. Period.

I have deduced this from my lab in the gym helping thousands of people over the last 20+ years. All illness in the physical realm stems from a weakness in the spiritual realm. This included emotional illness too which almost stemmed from the perception people had of themselves. That their personalities were themselves. Ruled by their egos.

True?
Neuroscience is still at the level of where medicine was in the 1700s
A long way to fully understand who we are….
Who “I AM.”

A question I’ve wrestled with for many years 
This realisation that we – each of us may be part of a greater network (for want of a better term) of consciousness has come to me many times over my 40 years on this planet 🌎.it is a question I’ve wrestled with for many years

I think my friend has a very good point because I did come to a realization many, many years ago in my late teens.

I have two stories to share with you (but will share the second in a future blog). The one I am going to share here, I have only told a handful of people in my life so far and now I am going to share it with you …

One day about 23 years ago, before I stepped in to the gym I would eventually own 15 years later (I saw myself owning it from the moment I first walked in to the place and I was only 17), I was driving along a major free-way about 5 minutes from home. It was between 5am and 6am somewhere and the sun was just beginning to rise. I hadn’t slept for 24 hours straight. My cousins and I had gone out to the city for a night out and I was the designated driver (well I didn’t start drinking until about 21). I was still only 17.

I was driving at about 70km per hour, passing a set of lights as it turned ‘orange’. I was on the inside lane of a 3 lane freeway. At that point, the Sun was rising and it’s morning rays shone in to my eyes, blinding me temporarily. I was caught between deciding to close my eyes or keep it open.

Believe or not believe.
Get your ass off the pole of the fence (stop sitting on the fence!)
Choose.


Closed my eyes

I closed my eyes.

It felt so good. I would have closed it only for a second or two but it seemed like eternity and I wanted to just leave it so. Like I said, it felt so good. My tiredness disappeared and was replaced by a delicious warmth … and then a state of peace beyond all description.

It was as if I became oblivious of the physical body.

But then … a voice in my head said “Paul, open your eyes”. It sounded like my grandmother who I was very close to until she died when I was 13. I didn’t want to open my eyes …

but I did. I loved her and would do almost anything for her.

The quality of your Neuronal Connections in your brain 🧠 is a good analogy to the quality of connections you have in life.
Quality connections of neurons depend on its contact with others. Connections is a contact sport.
Responsible for transmission of critical electrical, chemical & hormonal messages -internal communication

Frozen in Time

When I opened my eyes, I realised that I was driving my car (with my cousins in the back seat, still fast asleep intoxicated with alcohol) but there was a lamp post I was just about to crash in to.

In that instant (it would have been less than a second … but which seemed like an eternity), I saw my whole life flash before my eyes. But before this happened, I felt intense fear. I have never felt fear like this ever since. There was a freezing shiver that ran up my spine and it seemed that my heart cried out in tears that were frozen in time.

In that space of time (which seemed like an enternity), my thoughts focused on manouvering the car away from the pole which seemed to be only a meter from the car bonnet. It all happened so fast.

The Brain 🧠. The Real Power rests within this living organism… between the billions of neuronal network… Great thinkers know that thoughts 💭 change the world. Guard and work on your thoughts … every single day. Your most important investment.
The mind.
I AM.
Use this most complex tool every created to become a better medium of communication to …. the universe, to infinite intelligence … to consciousness.
To your GOD.

I.T, happened 

In that instant, that cold shiver in my spine disappeared and then it happened.

I felt a state of peace beyond all description. This was accompanied by a suffusion of light with my life to that point flashing by at lightning speed. I was filled with what seemed like love. An overwhelming sense of love. Infinite love. For that ‘split second’, I believe time and space became one with me … and stopped or it seemed like. My perception of time and space was like nothing I had ever experienced.

It seemed like I became oblivious to my physical body and it seemed that my awareness fused with this light that was flashing before my eyes, flushing me with all my ‘life moments’.

it felt as if I was now fully connected with the universe… with consciousness.. interconnected with time and space so intricately, I was ONE with it.

that I was not me. Me was not an separate entity … me was nothing as I was part of a larger living whole. “I” was non-existent.

I. AM.
GOD?


I was in an illuminated state.

My mind stood still. My mind went silent. It seemed that all thought stopped. I was at my happiest. I was at peace. Fear vanished.

I am writing you this blog today because I survived that car accident. I have lived every second since that day, very differently. It changed my perception of life and the world forever.

You could say that I had a “near-death experience”.

After that experience, my accepted reality of the world seemed only temporary. Traditional religious teaching lost a lot of significance. So much so, that the loss of traditional religion spurned a personal discovery of spirituality.

ON that day, I believe that “I” didn’t really exist. That “I” was really a small, insignificant part of this larger, greater “I”. This greater “I” really determined what happened in my life.

“I am” didn’t really exist and “I” is NOTHING! It was this energy-field. This energy-field is the universe and we are all part of this universe.

We’re all connected to this greater force-field, we are ONE with it. I became ‘one with the universe’ at that moment where time stood still when I opened my eyes and so my life ‘flash’ before my eyes.

There is no “I am”. There is no ‘me’ so, if there is no “I am” and there is no ‘me’, then, it follows that “I AM NOTHING!”

I believe that so. We are all outposts of balls of consciousness that is connected to this universal consciousness. This is the real “I” in the “I AM”.

To strengthen this ‘connectivity’ to this wireless technology (that we call the universe), one just needs to replace ‘unloved’ with love. One needs to genuinely live with care and kindness. This is all that is required. The fruits of this will show itself in time.

One must also have patience and one must be compassionate towards everything, including one’s own self and thoughts. “I am” melds in to ‘nothingness’. Ponder on this thought for a moment…. And realise how profound this realisation of “I AM NOTHING” is. It is enlightening.

We are all part of ONE. One universe. Most of us just don’t have the right tools/applications to interpret the messages we perceive in the correct way.

You, me .. we … all are ONE with the universe.
With time & space…consciousness, itself.

I.AM Nothing but I AM God
So, I think my friend is on to something very profound at this phase in his life. The realisation that “I am” is more than “I – AM” and NOTHING AT ALL!

I am happy for him. His realisation. It is his journey through the sea of life. It confirms something I concluded on and changed my life forever that early morning driving home from a ‘big night out’ on the town. It changed my life forever.

From my perspective, I agree with my friend – “I Am” does not exist. “I am” is only an instrument of a larger “I” and that “I” is the universe. It is GOD or whatever you want to call it. it could be that I Am Nothing but I Am God and so to see you.

But, for now this “I Am” game I created to help my children (and now my friend’s kid) sleep better – works. We will continue using it until it becomes useless.

Strengthen your connection to this “I”. Leave your “I am” on the floor. Leave your ego at the door! It’s not worth the pain and suffering you will endure if you let it run your life.

Live every day as if it were your last. I know I do.

Choose wisely.

 

Until next time,

Explaining some of the little things (mosquitoes) that add up to the larger things in body re-engineering. Retired ex-Australian Wallaby & Waratahs Captain - Phil Waugh.

Explaining some of the little things (mosquitoes) that add up to the larger things in body re-engineering.
Retired ex-Australian Wallaby & Waratah’s Captain – Phil Waugh.

Writing things down sometimes helps in the communication process. The goal is not communication. The goal is EFFECTIVE communication. Sometimes lacking in all areas of life ie., 'being on the same page'. A+ Student: Retired ex-Australian Wallaby & Waratah's Captain listening intently.

Writing things down sometimes helps in the communication process.
The goal is not communication. The goal is EFFECTIVE communication ie, ‘being on the same page’.
A+ Student: Retired ex-Australian Wallaby & Waratah’s Captain listening intently.

~~Life COACH~~

~~Vitality, Health & Lifestyle Coach/Entrepreneur~~

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adaptation, ageing, awareness, belief systems, change, choices, courage

Be what you are.

The Best of the Best. Phil Waugh - retired ex-Australian Wallaby & Warrahs Captain willing to embrace knowledge. Increasing his awareness towards being the BEST HE IMAGINES HE CAN BE, using my framework. An A+ Student!

The Best of the Best.
Phil Waugh – retired ex-Australian Wallaby & Waratahs Captain willing to embrace knowledge.
Increasing his awareness towards being the BEST HE IMAGINES HE CAN BE, using my framework.
An A+ Student!

Knowing when it is time to ‘move on’ is very important.

Recognizing the various stages in your life is very important. Doing the right things at the right stages of life is important too. What’s key is that we need to be aware of these phases, take sufficient and appropriate action and adapt accordingly.

We all have experience of this already as it is beyond our control – baby to toddler; toddler to a young boy or girl; early teens and then late teens; the trying twenties and then the thirties and then middle-age. And it goes on … until you die.

I would like to talk about the change we have some control over. Most of the time it can be a very difficult time. You will experience emotional hurt and pain and more than likely, your actions may hurt others too. There is hurt and sorrow in the short-term but it is better for everyone in the long term.

There was a time in my life when I was doing group aerobics/body pump instructing and aquarobics instructing – back in the mid-90s, during my undergraduate years. I enjoyed helping the thousands of people that I saw over the four years and I was very good at it.

I could have continued and opened up my own franchises but I didn’t. Circumstances and philosophy on life changes and you find yourself saying “now, that’s enough of that”. A person’s philosophy is like the set of a sail on a ship he is captaining.

That was one short but important phase of my life. I felt that it was time to move on. And I did, with my first undergrad degree in hand, seeking work experience in a different field for a while.

But, letting go can be difficult. Matter of fact, it is probably one of the most difficult things we humans can endure in our life-time. Letting go of our bad experiences in our past; letting go of anger; letting go of guilt; letting go of friends and so forth.

It takes a lot of energy and courage to let go and to … move on.

Have you ever felt that way?

Have you ever felt that it was time to move on from a phase of life; a job maybe or even a career? Or have you ever felt that it was time to move on from a business relationship or friendship?

Recognizing these ‘moments’ and listening to your ‘inner-voice’ of reason and hard facts to tell you that it is time to move on is very important to your contentment in life.

A lot of people don’t move on for fear of the unknown. Fear holds people back like an anchor for a ship. Familiarity also keeps people from new adventures. But, not trying something new, not venturing in to unchartered territory as you sail your ship through life could result in you missing out on possible opportunities that may lie ahead in a different path.

Sometimes, opportunities come clothed in an overcoat.

Don’t let your ship be controlled by the changing currents of the seas. If you don’t make the change, someone else will. They say that a person’s philosophy is a major determining factor in how a person’s life turns out.

You could conclude if you desire to change your life for the better, you need to change your philosophy.

Re-set your sails and cut through the changing currents you face as you captain your ship through the sea of life. I suppose I would feel that way about a lot of things in life. If I feel that the activity doesn’t interest me or have an element of ‘freshness’ in it, I move away from it. Some people choose not to, but I believe it is very healthy for one to do so.

I move on from it.

Retired Ex-Australian Wallaby & Waratah's Captain - Phil Waugh doing triceps press-downs and "feeling the essence" with perfectly performed repetitions. A great example of a human being striving to be the BEST he can be - for himself, first and then, everyone else. All day. Every day.

Retired Ex-Australian Wallaby & Waratah’s Captain – Phil Waugh doing triceps press-downs and “feeling the essence” with perfectly performed repetitions.
A great example of a human being striving to be the BEST he can be – for himself, first and then, everyone else. All day. Every day.

 

Take your profession seriously but don’t take yourself too seriously. I think a lot of people make this rather childish mistake – taking themselves too seriously.

A long time ago, a wise man once told me at his birthday party not to take myself too seriously. He said that in the whole scope of life, the little things that go wrong and that you might stress about don’t really matter a whole lot.

Wise man. I agree.

The little things you stress about – for example, being late for an important meeting or missing a deadline or looking like a fool at the company’s Christmas party or missing out on a job – is minute in relation to the whole circus act out there, out there in life.

Meaning: You only really matter to a certain degree – so don’t take yourself too seriously in the process of various stages or projects/activities you undertake in your life.

That is life. That is as good as life gets…. So far (as Homer Simpson would say)!

If you take yourself too seriously, you will anchor yourself and won’t be able to move forward. You don’t help yourself and you can’t serve people any better. You would not be much help to society either. So, do yourself and everyone a favour and ‘lighten up’!

If you believe in you and your abilities. If you believe that change is inevitable, that change is good. If you believe that change is necessary then you will agree that the whole of life is a series of change and if you’re not changing, you’re not living.

The key ingredient is to work on improving your CHANGE MANAGEMENT skills.

If you’re confident enough in the way you feel, and in your abilities, whether it’s in an art form or whether it’s just your line of work, it comes off! You will always find a way to succeed.

Therein lies your hidden treasure: Confidence.

You don’t have anything to prove; you can just be what you are.  

As another wise man also said: Besides, Everyone else is taken.

 

Until next time,

Fully focused! A true warrior & champion. Focusing on making every repetition of every set of every exercise as ideal as possible. Practise does not make perfect - Perfect practise makes perfect! Photo: Retired Champion Ex-Australian Wallaby & Waratahs Captain and player in action under my watchful eyes.

Fully focused!
A true warrior & champion.
Focusing on making every repetition of every set of every exercise as ideal as possible.
Practise does not make perfect – Perfect practise makes perfect!
Photo: Retired Champion Ex-Australian Wallaby & Waratahs Captain and player in action under my watchful eyes.

~~Life COACH~~

~~Life COACH~~

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Real Love for The Real Man.

Every man needs to wake and release the 'champion' within him. Let it loose. Let it fly. Let it go. In his own way.

Every man needs to wake and release the ‘champion’ within him. Let it loose. Let it fly with wings. Let it go and serve others … In his own way.

I mentioned in my previous blog “The Simple-Complex Man”, it is without doubt that being a father is difficult in today’s world but, I believe, being a man – a ‘Real Man’ is more difficult.

Look around us and the avalanche of images and messages that bombards us, every day, of what a Real Man is. In Australia and most of the developed world, it is heavily communicated in stereotypes in beer ads or car commercials. A lot of these stereotypes I find, conflicts with what most men out there think of themselves.

There are a lot of great men out there but many of them are confused. Confused of what it means to be a REAL MAN. Let me elaborate …

You see, from my experience in helping hundreds of men in gyms over the last two decades, a lot of men are so much more than what these narrow stereotypes convey. Really shallow stereotypes actually. What is even more concerning is the various messages of ‘love’ and what love means to a ‘Real Man’. The majority buy in to these stereotypes and meet disappointment in life – sooner or later.

Very sad indeed.

Like I said, it is very difficult for a lot of men out there. A lot of men who don’t know what it means to be a Real Man.

I must admit that I do not know the full answer but I do think that a big part of being a Real Man is that he is AUTHENTIC.

We learn many definitions of ‘love’ and we can think of many examples of what it is. Some think it is impossible to understand or define. Fair enough. It does not, however, mean we should not try to understand it.

You see, as I see it, for all you men reading this, “Love” for a Real Man is simply this: Action. Remember that saying “action speaks louder than words?”. Well, I think certain elements apply here.

There’s also another definition and for you Christians reading this – a Real Man will love a woman the way the Bible says it to. I think even the most militant feminist would not dispute a love like THAT!

I believe if every man out there just has one goal and that is: to be the BEST MAN HE CAN BE. For himself, FIRST and then for everyone else. And, when he leaves this world for the other world, he might just come close enough to be a REAL MAN.

From my interaction with men of all ages over the last two decades, I have deduced that Real Men have a few common traits –

  1. He treats his wife RIGHT (in all areas of life).
  2. He is a SERVANT rather than a MASTER ( I would like to think my wife and I are Co-CEOs)
  3. He will do the RIGHT THING (doing the right thing is quite different to do what he has the RIGHT to do. Everything he does, he DOES WITH 100%. Why? Because nothing else would measure up).

So, how are you faring with the above traits (they are by no means exhaustive but are 3 that first come to my mind, deduced from my large sample of men over the last two decades)? Are you a Real Man? When can you call yourself a Real Man?

Well, let’s keep it simple. As I see it, there is only one way: become a BETTER SERVANT. Even the great Mother Theresa said that we need to serve ’til it hurts. I think this should be every man’s motto for his love for his woman. Yes, all REAL MEN seek to SERVE. Keep giving of yourself to your woman. To give is to serve.

If you’re a christian, then just like Jesus Christ, our saviour served his beloved followers. All GREAT MEN seek to SERVE.

This can be quite difficult to accept because most of today’s men are told the opposite with all the unfiltered messages being absorbed in to their minds, their ‘thought factories’. These unfiltered messages tell these men that they should grow up and find a gorgeous wife who will take care of his needs.

He then spends his entire existence seeking out that someone, he is brainwashed in to believing that she will bring him happiness because she will SERVE HIM. In return for this fulfilment of his distorted delusions of what life and love is and what it means to be a Real Man, he is made King of his Castle!

Yes, he works very hard. It’s the ‘manly’ thing to do, after-all he is told. He works very hard and gives her everything HE THINKS SHE WANTS. 

But is that really what the woman wants? I beg to differ.

I have helped many men and women transition through very painful separations and divorces over the years and have felt the pain with them. It is very difficult for all parties involved. What I have noticed was that a lot of these women did get everything (from a material sense) that money could buy. A lot of these women had men who bought them everything THEY THOUGHT THEIR WIVES WANTED.

Costly mistake. I am appealing to all men reading this and all men out there to not make this mistake, like so many men have made before you.

What I found was that most of these women were miserable. Why? The reason I am about to tell you is something people don’t seem to talk about and may surprise some of you readers but I think it is one of the major factors in the consistently high divorce rates in society. Men reading this, I think the one very strong contributing factor that made these women miserable was that they were permanently PUT IN SECOND PLACE!

Not fair at all.

No one likes being in SECOND PLACE in anything for too long. Believe me, I know what it is like because I came 2nd in the Australian Natural Body-building Championships in three separate occasions. Came so close, within a whisker … but to no avail.

Very dis-heartening and demoralising.

So, what I have found is that by the time I help these men and women during these painful transitions, most of these men do not fully understand what went wrong. A lot of these men are a little confused and I don’t blame them.

They are confused because they cannot ‘see’ how they have put their woman 2nd all along. But by the time I see them, it is too late. These men just cannot put their woman first.

These men cannot because it goes against every fibre of their being. It goes against everything that they have been taught in all the messages society has pumped in to him from early child-hood. From within his family, his neighbours, his schools, his friends, his extended families and all the advertising messages and shows.

It surrounds him and blinds him. Chokes him. The Real Man is chained within, as he suffers silently. Like so many men in today’s world do. Suffer in silence with inconsistent definitions of what a Real Man is. His whole belief-system is distorted and he has been following blindly.

He cannot be blamed for total responsibility for this, if everything, everyone and his whole world is telling him that the distorted definition of Real Love is what it is. The world has inverted whatever that was made perfect by God. That of the real definition of love for a Real Man.

And do you know what the imitation is? Do you want to know what the counterfeit is dear readers? Do you know what the substitute is (just like there is for almost all genuine products out there)?

It is this: LUST.

It is everywhere and this is one of the many reasons I believe it is very difficult just to be A MAN in today’s world. Just like all non-genuine, unauthentic, imitation products and parts you buy – LUST can be cheaper, looks good and is just like the REAL DEAL. It can be very satisfying and bring excitement in to your life for a little while.

But, it is NOT TRUE LOVE!

You see – Lust, takes. Love, gives.

Lust is all about you, your selfish desires – your need to be the MASTER. Love puts your woman’s desires FIRST. Love puts SERVICE to your woman at the top of your ‘TO DO’ list.

Lust takes – for your selfish benefit. Love GIVES, for the one we love. This GIVING MUSCLE keeps growing if you feed and train it right. Strive to become a Real Man. All day. Every day. For the rest of your life on this earth.

Search for Real Love. Curb your enthusiasm for lust.

Lust is temporary, it will perish. Love is forever – in this lifetime and infinity. Even though you will return to dirt when you die, your soul – your spirit, your consciousness, will remain in the universe for all eternity. Your love will keep GIVING and you will be fulfilled beyond your desires.

… knowing that you were a REAL MAN while you were breathing and walked this earth. That you truly loved. That you were truly a servant to her – that you genuinely SERVED.

Those that you leave behind will have memories of this man. This version of a man that …. Went against the grain and was a … Real Man. To all Men reading this, I leave you this last message:

Be your AUTHENTIC-SELF. Tell the TRUTH. DO and BE YOUR BEST – ALWAYS. Take care OF YOUR FAMILY. RESPECT YOU – RESPECT OTHERS. Never stop DREAMING. Follow your DREAMS.

 

Until next time,

Connecting the dots through 'mind-muscle' communication via the nervous system strengthening. Hold!

Connecting the dots through ‘mind-muscle’ communication via the nervous system strengthening.
Hold!

 

~~Life COACH~~

~~Life COACH~~

All photos taken by Robert Walsh Photography. Visit “www.robertwalsh.com.au” for an authentic artist. A true professional. A lovely human-being that is Robert. Vv.

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We Stand Alone.

My son Zachary and I at a family member's wedding. A lovely day.

If you could look in to a crystal ball and see the future, what would your legacy be? What would it look like? I have always thought about this question, more so, since my children came in to this world. I am sure you have too.

Would the line of men starting from you be men of integrity, men of honour … men who are true, authentic leaders? Or, would they be un-Godly men, from generation to generation without a clue of what it means to be a leader?

Would your descendants be men who are confused on what it is to be a man, of what it means to be a leader? Confused leaders appearing from generation to generation, one by one, because they have had no clear-cut role model.

Men who have not discovered their authentic man. Their authentic self.

Well, it starts with YOU.

I have always thought that whatever mistakes the men that have come before me have done, whatever mistakes my father and father’s father had done will end with me. The future Valentines begin with me.

The destiny of the future generations I see in the crystal ball rests in my hands. Your future generations of Men in your line rests in your hands, too.

No one else but me. Just like there is no one else in your line, except you.

Give him the scaffolding in your son’s life to help him, help himself build & live a life of significance. With a foundation of good etiquette/manners.

We stand alone.

The choices that you make with your family today will determine the quality of life in your family tree for generations to come. That is why one man – YOU – can make a difference. You can have a say with how the future turns out, so have your say damn it!

Plant your Oak Tree now.

To all the dads reading this, remember this one thing: You can call yourself a HERO without going to war by just saving your boy(s), your son(s). It will be the greatest and most fulfilling task of your life. Make that commitment today.

I know I have.

Be the role model your son needs before it is too late. Please. Don’t fail our sons like so many men have done over past generations. Besides, we owe it to them too because let’s be honest, they have helped us become better adults.

The fathers of today – all of us, need to be there for our sons, the men of the future. We must not fail them. We must be there for them, NOW, not tomorrow, not next month, not when they are teenagers. By then, it will be too late. They need to be shown the way and assisted, maybe, even help be the wind beneathe his wings like that famous Bette Middler. As Willaim Blake stated:

“No bird soars too high if he flies with his own wings”.

Look around us now, look around at what is happening to the world. Where have all the real leaders gone? There is not enough of them around anymore?

It starts with all of us MEN … all of us FATHERS. And what makes a good father? Maybe, it can be explained as simply as this :

“A good father is simply, a little bit of a mother” as Lee Salk suggested.

In my over two decades of helping and guiding young men in the gym, I have found that there is an inverse relationship with time spent with a child in their younger years and conflict in later years. You see, less time spent with children in younger years can result in more time spent with keeping these young men out of trouble and harm’s way in teenage and early twenties years.

Society might show signs that role models do not exist anymore. That children only see role models in sports stars and musicians and eccentric characters.

No, I do not wish to believe this.

It is up to each and every one of us, dads in particular, to grab on to our role model responsibilities. Each of us can change our own little world, in a way that only we know how.

Fathers, dads reading this, let’s be honest with ourselves, we all make mistakes. I like to think that we’re all flawed heroes, that’s what I tell my son and daughter. We have all made bad decisions. I know I have. Some of these decisions have to be reversed.

If you have accepted a promotion and transfer that takes you a step higher up the corporate ladder at the expense of your kids, think again. Maybe you need to re-think and reverse the decision. Take a step back now for your future generations.

I think providing for our kids is important but don’t lose focus, Men. What is important here, what is it that you as a Dad need to bestow on your children, especially your son(s) – the men of the future – while you have the opportunity to do so?

My son and I.
Provide the best blueprint you can of what it means to be a man.
He needs you now more than ever.
Save him now so that tomorrow’s world will be saved too.
Vv.

Love them unconditionally

What’s more important than providing a life of ease for them is ensuring they know you love them unconditionally.

It is inevitable that they will de-glorify us dads and us, parents when they are older and replace us with other role models. But, hopefully, before this happens, you would have planted the Oak seed of your character so firmly in their minds that, future generations of men will lead with true vision and purpose.

All because of you.

All because you stood alone.

United, if every father reading this, if every man makes this commitment to himself for his future generation of men – his seeds, that crystal ball of yours will show generation after generation of our men being true leaders.

United in this cause, we can change the world. Change its future for the better. Build a world of better leaders. A world where these men (and women) truly understand what it means to be a leader and that is to inspire.

Individually, we have the power to change our own little worlds. We can change the lives of our little men. To do our part and make our own little contribution to society, it is a lonely place but you must persevere for their future …. For …. Our future, too.

But to do this … we stand alone within our little family, knowing that we are not alone nor lonely. Because we know in our heart that we are united through a spirit of belief, that we are shaping better leaders, better decision-makers that will run our world – tomorrow, when we are all old and grey.

We are making this investment in our sons now ….. For a better tomorrow.

So, stand up, stand your ground. Love that son of yours like you have never loved another male before. Unconditionally. Win this battle today to win the war, tomorrow.

We stand alone to …. Stand united in this worthwhile cause!

Until next time,

Popeye Pirate Paul … & the exciting adventures of being a parent

The old Captain Viking Pirate & his Gritty Warrior Viking Pirate son … enjoying some ‘Father-son” experience.
These moments get etched into the memory bank of great experiences.
Build these up.

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The Simple-Complex Man.

With the next generation of Valentine males - Zachary.

With the next generation of Valentine males – Zachary.

Being a modern-day dad can be tough. No dad out there will say that this role is easy. But being a modern-day man, can be tougher.

Most men reading this would agree.

You see, I believe there have been generations of men who were failed by their fathers and are lost in a cloud of confusion. A lot of men spend a lifetime aimlessly drifting, through no fault of their own, succumbing to mindless misinterpretations of masculine identity.

Spending all their lives searching for the real meaning of what it means to be a real MAN – an authentic man.

If you’re a dad, have you thought about the influence you’re having on your children, especially your sons – If you have sons? It is amazing how our sons mimic everything we do, our actions, the way we walk and talk and almost all other mannerisms.

Do you realize that your little boy (s) is watching you like a hawk? He is closely examining you all the time. I find this happening with my son, Zachary. I think he is inquisitively trying to figure out what maleness is all about, and I am his role model just like you are your son’s role model. This is one of the many ways his existence has made me strive to be a better man. A better father.

Now, that is a tonne of responsibility right there. For all men with sons.

If you’re a Christian, I hope they see in you a deep, uncompromising love for God. You see, I try to strive for balance and hope that he sees both toughness and tenderness. I believe if you can demonstrate this balance and communicate it through your actions, this is one aspect will serve them well, as boys and later on, as young men of the world.

If you have daughters as well, this delicate balance of toughness and tenderness will also benefit your little girl(s), too. I believe they will grow up with a clear vision of the kind of men who make a good husband (if they choose to marry).

To all men reading this, take a good look at YOU in the mirror and ask yourself, are you the BEST MAN you can be? Are you an authentic man?

What do I mean by that, I hear you say?

Well, it simply means that you have accepted yourself as a ‘simple-complex’ male. That your masculinity is authentic because you’re flexible, you have built-in ‘elasticity’ in your manhood. You’re not afraid to get in touch with your feminine side.

Authentic men have a deeper sense of security.

There has been a growing number of emasculated men in today’s society. I have observed this over the last 20 years or so of being in and around male-dominated gyms and helping hundreds of men of all ages, help themselves, find themselves. But also, an observation of life, in general.

Emasculated men are Men who appear to not know what it means to be a real man. This is very sad indeed. These men should work on their balance by becoming secure enough. Secure enough, by confronting timidity and fear and to take more risks and commitments.

There are places and services available today that can help men. A good place to consider adding to your life is working on your ‘self’ in the gym. Get stronger. Get healthier. Feel better. Feel fitter. Re-claim your sense of balance. Re-claim part of the essence of masculinity, for no one else but – YOU.

On the other hand, there still exists a decent level of macho men too. I think these men should seek balance, too, by becoming secure enough to crawl out from under the false pretensions and quit trying to impress everyone around them. …

Just like in the superheroes of “Fantastic 4” where there is an elastic hero. An authentic man is an elastic man. He is a man that can lead with firmness, but also submit with humility.

I recall the great student of life – Bruce Lee saying, one has to be like water. It takes the shape of whatever form it is in. Water can break the toughest rock and can be very gentle and calm. It can exist in every state. It is essential to the very essence of life.

“Be water, my friend” – he says.

An authentic man strives to be like water.

An authentic man can challenge with precision and swiftness but also encourage enthusiasm. He can muster aggression when required to fight for causes he believes in but moments later, cry and empathise with those that are suffering.

If you’re a Christian male, remember this: we’re all created in the image of God. You’re a magnificent creature, even if you have never had anyone say that to you.

You’re male and you’re loved by God almighty. I am sure non-Christians’ faith spread similar messages of love – for you, the man.

Strive to be that “Mr Flexible” or as I say “Mr Flex – Able” … find that authentic man inside you (if you haven’t already done so). Be comfortable being your own ‘simple-complex’ man.

All the very best on your search becoming that authentic man you hope and imagine yourself to be.

Until next time,

 

Providing a little bit of assistance. My pupil here 'feeling the essence' of the exercise. In this instance, experiencing a pump in the guns/biceps. Sometimes, its the little things, that determine your success in pursuit of a worthwhile goal.

Providing a little bit of assistance. Brad, here ‘feeling the essence’ of the exercise. In this instance, experiencing a pump in the guns/biceps.
Sometimes, its the little things, that determine your success in pursuit of a worthwhile goal.

 

A teacher-pupil relationship is rewarding to both.

A healthy teacher-pupil relationship is a beautiful thing. Brad, here, is an ‘A’ student.

Black & White Photos by Robert Walsh of Robert Walsh Photography. For more information, look up

“www.robertwalsh.com.au”. Brilliant Artist. Skilled Professional. Wonderful human-being. Thanks Rob! Paul.

VVc_logo_cropped

 

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Why can’t 2 and 2 equal 5?

Side Chest.

Side Chest pose. Building muscle & sculpturing the body Is very mathematically based as you need to have a very good understanding of “balance & symmetry “ to be able to create “flow” in muscles 💪. Anyone can build a big chest or biceps 💪 but does it flow with the shoulders & triceps and with the lower body? 

I love mathematics.

I loved it so much that I majored in it in my first year of my undergraduate studies at university over two decades ago. When I got my first ‘c’ grade, I thought that NASA would not be interested in me and so I quit one of my loves. It was difficult decision back then.

But I knew that it would be with me for the rest of my life and I could call upon it at any point and it has been at my beckon all the way up to now. I use it in my thought processes and decisions every day.

I still think like a mathematician in many daily challenges and the many decisions I have to make. You do too. We all do.

I think mathematics comes from life and I think it explains principles of life. We can learn a lot from mathematics and I know I have. It challenges our powers of reasoning and that is one of the reasons I love it.

I also love the purity of it. Unlike other sciences, mathematics seems to be in a class of its own – neither fully complying with the experimental sciences like Chemistry nor in the creative arts.

It’s a loner. It stands alone.

People live by the rules they set up. Does having more rules in society indicate the decrease of trust?

Learn HOW to learn

Mathematics essentially teaches you to be a problem solver and I think this is very applicable to everyday life – at home, out in the sporting field or at work. It teaches you and excites you to ‘learn how to learn’, again. This is very important because most adults stop learning once they leave the educational system.

Not ideal at all. There is just so much to learn, so much great nutrition for the brain and the enhancement of the mind.

It is easy for anyone to do a puzzle if someone has told you the answer. Yes, but this is simply a test of memory. No, a mathematician is someone who feels he or she is able to solve a problem that neither you, nor anyone else, has studied before.

Now, this my friends, is the beauty of mathematics – where it teaches you the powers of reasoning.

Even if you disliked mathematics in school or still do, mathematics is all around us. Both geometry and arithmetic are closely connected with everyday life – look around at all the buildings – your home, your church, your temple, your roads. It’s everywhere.

Society cannot function as it does without mathematics.

What about arithmetic? It’s everywhere too – we measure everything don’t we? What is your salary? How do you confirm that what you are paid is what was agreed upon? What about paying two $2 coins to a bus driver for a $5 ride? What do you think he will do? Do you think he would accept this? I don’t think he would, would he? I think he would regard the two times two dollar coins equals four dollars and not five dollars, and tell you that you are a dollar short.

Why?

Well, probably because it is well entrenched and established by the experience of everyday life. That bus driver has always known two and two equal four. Nothing else.

My question is why can’t two and two equal five? Why not?

Probably because we can’t imagine two times two equalling five. Why can’t magicians who perform miracles every day in front of an audience turn two plus two in to five? This miracle would impress me more than any other miracle.

But, that is not the point of this blog. The point I am trying to get to is that we simply cannot imagine two plus two equalling five. This is where imagination has its limitations.

Balance & symmetry brings you closer to harmony … to beauty …closer to infinity. Just like mathematics does

The extent lies in awareness 

Why is this? Why can’t we imagine two and two equalling five or any other number but – four? Maybe because in the whole of human history two plus two has always equalled four, nothing more, nothing less. Our mind has not needed to imagine it any other way.

I think the answer lies in the way my children and all the children and all of us have learned, to speak for example. My children learned how to speak by hearing my wife and I call them by their names. They first learned their names and our names and then household objects and so on. They then learned words describing how they felt like “ are you tired?” “Are you tired?” or “she looks happy” or “say you are sorry”.

It is the same way that mathematics has evolved.

Mathematics is so pure that it is just like life. The meaning of love and being wise, for example, we have to learn from everyday life just like children learn how to speak words. We understand better, directly from our own experiences – what we see, what we feel and what we do. The extent lies in awareness.

Mathematics, just like philosophy has roots that lie in the common experiences of daily life. Mathematics evolved from and through life and reasoning is not separate from the other powers of the mind and other parts of life. No, it is intricately connected.

Reasoning has grown from experience. This is a fact of mathematics. This is also a fact of life. This is the only way we learn from life – through direct experience of everyday life. You’ve learned that way, I have too. I see my children learning that day-by-day. Beautiful isn’t it?

If this is the way we learn best, then it follows that we should become better students at it, at life, that is. We should become the best students we can be OF LIFE.

So, back to my question: Why can’t two and two equal five?

 

Have the courage of a Tiger 🐯. Do what is RIGHT, Always. Don’t discount the power of your experiences.

Fly with our minds

It’s very difficult to imagine anything else, isn’t it? Just like if I asked you to imagine a new colour. You would find that you would be combining the effect of colours that you have already seen. A law well known to psychologists is “There is nothing in imagination which was not previously in sense.”

If anyone two hundred years ago had prophesized what the world would be like to-day, he would have surely been considered insane and thrown in to a mental hospital or crucified.

So, when the fact that we are unable to find reason with making two and two equal five demonstrates one of the limitations of imagination – it is outside the experience we have had.

Our experience has not been touched. We do not have wings and have not learned how to ‘fly with our minds’ yet.

Maybe, just maybe, we need to imagine better – without boundaries of schooled thought. We need to lose our inhibitions in imagination like what alcohol does to us when we drink a little too much. Maybe, we have all been using our minds incorrectly, maybe we have not fully utilized our powers of imagination and ‘seeing what we don’t see’. Maybe we will find reasons and possibilities if and when we have expanded our imagination to see clearer pictures and numbers.

Pictures and numbers in our minds that we have never seen before. Generating our power of reasoning through experimental imagination.

Maybe then, two and two could equal five. But, for now we know nothing else and probably should accept it as four as society may classify one as insane.

But, in a hundred years from now …. Anything is possible. Newer colours … two and two equalling five … mental telepathy …. Maybe we will be able to fly after all … that starts off with ‘wings of imagination’.

We’re only limited by our imagination.

Imagine A BETTER YOU. A BETTER WORLD. A BETTER TOMORROW. A BETTER LIFE.

Imagine you being YOUR BEST …. Even if the attainment of it seems ridiculous or impossible when you try to. It is obvious that no one can predict the future, it would not do you any harm by imagining a better one.

Never, ever, ever give up in imagining a better YOU.

Make believe that 2 and 2 equal 5.

Tell no one.

Until next time,

IMGP3144

Build your bridge from where you are to … where you desire to be. A lot of times, it pays to get help from an experienced builder… who “walks the walk” ..& not all “just talk”

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See what can be, not just what is.

_MG_9779-1

We’ve all grown up hearing that lovely line from some aunty or uncle, trying to sound wise and encouraging, but all the time not knowing what it really means –

“where there’s a will, there’s a way!”

I have thought about this affirmation over the last 40 years and I have to say that I don’t fully agree. Here’s why –

The above affirmation is lovely, but it is somewhat delusional. Affirmations such as this are great and kind of motivating for some and that is wonderful.

However I think that one should not forget that affirmations without discipline and persistence is useless.

What I am trying to say is that affirmations without a strategy is rubbish and wish-full thinking. Now, this is very different to ‘positive thinking’.

Matter of fact, merely stating an affirmation without a strategy is the beginning of delusionary thinking. A total opposite of positive thinking. This is why I think that affirmations mentioned in the wrong context can be more than mis-leading, it can cloud peoples’ perceptions of the truth and they may become increasingly un-aware of themselves.

Not a helpful place to be in.

Sometimes, working harder DOES NOT LEAD TO BETTER RESULTS. Sometimes, every incremental work done after a certain point gives diminishing returns. You simply don’t get any better. You don’t improve your position. You basically stagnate and hit a plateau.

It can be likened to building muscle in the gym. After a period of quick growth early in their training career, most gym enthusiasts hit a ‘plateau’ and don’t seem to make any more progress despite training more, eating more and so forth. No matter what they do, there is no visible physical change to their physique. A good example where working harder does not lead to better results.

Very frustrating indeed!

“But, what do you do then?” you must be thinking.

Well, I believe that sometimes you need to just cut out all the detail and clutter. Sometimes, to go to the ‘next level’, you need to cut out all the ‘red tape’. Yes, cut out all the red tape, all the clutter of over-analysis in your head – your mind!

“And how do you propose I do that?” I hear you say.

Well, the simple way is best: DO NOT use any willpower!

Yep, use no willpower.

If you’re solution-oriented, you will find that your logical side of your brain will be conjuring up ways to solve the problem and impose a certain thinking on your inner-being. It is very easy to succumb to this, heck, you’ve been doing that for most of your life. Working harder, with tonnes of willpower but seeing no end in sight.

Working harder is not the answer.

Just like the person in the gym trying so hard to put on muscle and spur on growth but to no avail. On the surface, working harder seems like the less risky and smarter option to achieving a certain goal.

Not so. Imagination is key.

From my observations of and deductions made from the many individuals who have successfully completed any one of my programs, those that adopted the use of their imagination more, tended to achieve the results they desired.

I encouraged them to visualize the end result very vividly and to also imagine the emotional gratification (how they would feel) of the freedom state of being they had wanted. Sometimes, it is very important to resist the urge to thinking logically.

Sometimes, what is needed to get the job done is not more willpower or more effort. No, sometimes, what is needed is more profound than that: SIMPLICITY. Simplicity through IMAGINATION. If there is one thing you would want to work hard at when you hit a road-block or plateau, I suggest you work harder on your imagination.

Stop. Take stock. Rest.

Imagine more by dreaming more. Become a kid again. But when you dream, dream big. There is magic in thinking big. Feel the end-result you’re seeking. Visualize and try to simulate the emotions you would feel when you achieve the goal. Don’t be blind to the power that rests in you.

See “what can be”. Not just ‘what is’. This way of thinking contributed significantly towards me representing Australia at the World Natural Bodybuilding Championships in NY, USA and ranked in the Top 5 in two consecutive years. The power of imagination at work.

People who go through my programs remind themselves in their journey towards their BEST, that ‘you’re better than you think you are’. They learn to stretch their vision.

From the many people I have helped over the years, I have learned many things. One thing I have learned in the successes and failures is that the result a person achieves is dependent on belief and capacity. It boils down to this:

“How much you can do depends on how much you think you can do”.

When you believe you can do more and dream big, your mind shows you the way. From my observations of people over the last 23 years in the gym and the little miracles I witness almost every single day, I have no doubt that capacity is a ‘state of mind’.

So, BELIEVE. Dream better, see ‘what can be’. Dream big. Use your imagination. Practise. You’ll find a way, this way. You don’t need more will-power to find a way. You have tonnes of that already if you’ve lived this far.

Be the BEST you can be in your mind – for you, first. Then, for others.

Achievement follows.

Until next time,

Paul V1

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Live. Die. With dignity.

 


Most of us would agree that food, shelter and water are the most basic of our needs. Beyond this, most of us would disagree as to which needs are more important – it depends on the person and the circumstance I guess.

I think you can adhere to a simple, yet, powerful advice from the wise Marcus Aurelius –

“if it is not right, don’t do it: if it is not true, don’t say it”

Maslow’s hierarchy pyramid puts these most basic of human needs in a category called “physiological needs” along with sex. There are 5 levels and we progress to the next level only when the lower levels are satisfied.

There are safety needs and then belonging/love needs (which includes family, friends and sexual intimacy). From there we strive to satisfy our ‘esteem’ needs and beyond that we reach ‘self-actualization’ needs. Only 1 in 100 people actually reach this level according to Maslow.

I wrote about the most fundamental of human existence in a previous blog and that is – ‘freedom’. A big word this is and can be defined in many different ways.

Every one of us live in fear in one form or another, every day as we go about our lives. Fear comes in many forms and when it exists, freedom is sacrificed. I would go on to say that there are many societies in the world today whose people actually accept and are content to live under fear.

Good people cannot stand by and let injustice happen … which removes the key element of Freedom – dignity.

It is amazing that in today’s world where technology is changing at an exponential rate, some of the most basic of human needs like freedom are not or have not changed for the better in centuries.

One such human need that is taken away when freedom is removed is ‘dignity’. This is usually the result of control through fear.

To be a complete human, however, I believe each and every one of us need to be allowed to live our lives with dignity. When people live in fear or when freedom is taken away, their ‘human-ness’ is taken away and this is experienced at different levels.

The very essence of feeling human is lost. One loses his/her dignity where the very foundation of what it means to be ‘human’ is swept away from under you. You lose control over your existence and destiny.

This is one of the worst feelings one could ever have to endure while being alive. This, I believe, is worse than going without food or water. Dignity is a far more important need.

Being deprived of dignity for a prolonged period increases the risk of losing hope. And when you lose hope, you lose the desire to live. Not a good place to be.

If you went without food and water for long enough, you will die. If your freedom was taken away from you long enough, you will either die or become rebellious. The significant difference between these deaths is that if you die without food and water, you can still die with dignity.

We all need to live and die with dignity.

True. Allow citizens to live & die with dignity.

It is a need. A most basic, most fundamental need.

So, stop for a few seconds and say a prayer for all those people in societies (including ours) all around the world who live in fear and who are deprived of the need to live their daily lives with dignity.

Pray that they may find the courage and fortitude to continue seeking this very essence of self-actualization that Maslow refers to. Pray that they be given the very thing that makes them fully human. Pray that they get their dignity back.

If they aren’t given their dignity back, pray that they take it back. Let us all pray that each and every one of them garner enough voice to say ‘no’ to the injustice they experience. The word ‘no’ is perhaps the greatest expression of human dignity possible.

Say ‘no’ to any form of control through fear!

Let us pray that they gather enough wisdom to know that you cannot find without seeking. You cannot hear without listening and not having the luxury of saying no and enough is enough is to make worthless any acts of seeking or hearing or doing.

Effort alone is not enough.

You must believe and hope that freedom from all forms of fear is possible and deserving of you.

Choose to say ‘no’ to anyone or anything that forces you to be someone you’re not. Keep your dignity. Don’t sell your soul.

Be yourself – always.

Live. Die. With dignity.

 

Until next time,

Wonderful insight in to the mind of a Great Leader.
Be courageous. Everything stems from courage. Never let anyone or anything tear your dignity from you.

Patience & love is vital to each individual, each community, each nation and the world 🌎.

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Choosing a gym.

True.

Your philosophy matters

A common fear among people who have never been to a gym and even current gym enthusiasts is feeling a little intimidated when they are there. The atmosphere of some gyms can be quite intimidating indeed for some.

I know I felt that same feeling many, many years ago when I first summoned the courage to enter a gym. After a few tries, you will get over this initial feeling of discomfort – something all trainees will have to deal with at some time.

Now, I could go through a top 10 things to consider when assessing which gym deserves your patronage such as – cleanliness, Equipment conditions, equipment in general, personal training services, locker availability and cost etc but I won’t.

Why? Well, you could easily do this yourself on the internet these days and maybe even get on a web-site that compares gyms and ranks them based on your buying criteria. A common method of deciding on a choice if you are that inclined.

However I believe that sometimes, in life it is more fruitful if you make your decision that is the best for you not based on your ‘need’.

No, sometimes in life, you need to base your decision on what resonates with your philosophy in life. If you don’t, then you may well find yourself (like hundreds of thousands of gym goers world-wide) jumping from gym to gym, searching. Searching for the gym that best suits their needs.

Your philosophy matters.

With Margaret and her guide dog. She was such a lovely human being. Never said never.
I trained her daughter (who was also partially blind) to represent Australia at the Paralympics.
She was one tough school girl with a lot of GRIT. Just like her mum.
Choose a gym that resonates and agrees with your philosophy of life.

Choosing a gym is an ínternal’ exercise, not an éxternal’ one

It is highly likely that you will not find your answer to your dissatisfaction by constantly switching gyms (for whatever reasons you generate). Instead you will likely grow tired and you will eventually feel de-motivated, like millions of trainees worldwide do. When this sets in, you can kiss your work-outs goodbye!

Sad, I know … but true.

After being in and around gyms for almost thirty years now and owning my own family gym for about seven years, here’s what I believe you need to do:

  1. Determine your philosophy on life – ascertain what you value in life, what are you principles?
  2. Find a gym that is aligned to this.

I am almost 100% certain that you will be content. This is not an exercise in ‘external search’ for a gym but it is an exercise in ‘internal search’ for the Real YOU. What I am trying to say is that choosing a gym is an internal exercise, not an external one.

For some, this search for a different gym and never being satisfied may be a manifestation of a deep seated fear of rejection that may likely go back to their formative years where they may have been subjected to ‘conditional love’. This manifestation becomes an obsession with what other people think and fuels this search for that elusive gym that meets all their needs.

Me and my family of extended family of members.
I created an environment to replace something I was missing living in a busy, big city like Sydney: the intimacy and connectedness of a truly local and extended family feel that I grew up with in my youth in Fiji.
I missed my éxtended family’ and this served my needs and the members needs too

The perfect gym does not exist

You won’t find that, a gym that meets all your needs, that is. It is like searching for “Mr Right” … or “Mrs Perfect”. They don’t exist like the perfect gym that meets ALL your needs does not exist. Accept that the Perfect gym does not exist. What exists is a person or a gym that meets most of your key needs and resonate with your philosophy on life.

I must warn you though: it is not an easy exercise. It can be a little scary. Remember though that all negative habit patterns can be overcome by giving your mind new nutritional thoughts. The most powerful, most nutritional thought we can think is “I like myself”.

A simple, yet profound statement of belief and I liken it to an anti-biotic for the mind. Makes you feel better after repeating the statement for a period of time. Try it, see how you feel.

A hallmark of a mature human being like you is the acceptance of total responsibility for your life and all the decisions you have made to date. The acceptance of total responsibility is a line in the sand in your life that from that point, you have no more excuses.

Your feeling of personal freedom and total control of your life and happiness is a direct product of your acceptance of total responsibility. This includes your responsibility to investing time in your health and fitness.

So – Accept. Totally.

Then ….

Me my extended family members; a group of members of my family gym.
They all loved training and being part of the extended family that was my gym

Join the club that chooses you

Join the gym that is aligned with your values and principles. Join the club that chooses you.  I prefer good old-school gyms (very few around these days) where there are a good selection of free-weights (barbells and dumbells) and good benches, a power rack or cage (to let the animal inside of you out).

A gym that has outstanding free-weights equipment and the best ambience wins, hands-down all the time for me.

Personally, I prefer a gym that doesn’t treat you like a number. Where everyone knows your name and your know theirs. Where people talk to each other instead of just connecting with a machine. A gym where if you’re absent, people notice it. A gym like they used to be – a social club. Like the gym I owned and managed for about seven years of my life, a real ‘family gym’. I was so connected to each and every member that they would tell me of their travel plans and almost everything about themselves and their families and ups-and-downs in their lives.

My life was intricately connected to each person, so much so that if I noticed that they hadn’t come for a while, I would personally call them up ( I wouldn’t get my staff to call them). If I didn’t get them (and if they lived alone), I would drive over to their residence to see if they were ók’.

Believe me when I say that I had intervened in many people’s lives and brought them back to this reality. There were people that no one called up on, except for me. There were people that, if I hadn’t knocked on their door of their residence to see if they were ok, they wouldn’t be here today. That was one of my roles as a caring, trusting and compassionate gym owner.

Members of my éxtended family’ also connected over food (protein for the hard-working muscles) and beer (for the biceps peak)
We were a family in more ways then just one (training together)

What type of Gym Goer are YOU?

Join a ‘type’ of gym goer. What type are you?

Feel ‘connected’ with a real person instead of being connected through technology mediums. Talk to other patrons of the gym (the way my old school gym was, where everyone spoke to one another and knew each other’s names. Just a big extended family, like I lived in my early youth, growing up in the paradise islands of Fiji.

You’ll probably find that you would have more in common with more people there then you would be different.

We’re all social beings after all and your time in the gym satisfies one of the most basic of human needs in a very healthy way – our innate social need.

And become the … the … social animal that you know you are but instead of swapping alcoholic recipes, you’ll be sharing protein shake concoctions. Realising this and accepting it in your life can make you look on the bright side of life more readily. It could move you closer to the elusive ‘happiness’ state … something that the world can learn from the Happiest Citizens on this planet: Fiji.

Just so happens, I was born and lived my early youth in Fiji and understand why Fijians are the happiest people on this earth, a few of the many reasons why are touched on in my words above. Find your gym by allowing the ‘fijian’ in you to speak to you.

All the very best in your choice!

Until next time,

Cheers & Ahoy!

 

The old Captain Viking Pirate …. & choosing the right gym for YOU

Building your strength in the gym is only one definition of what it means to be ‘strong’

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