balance, balance sheets, Energy, spirit, spiritual balance sheet, spirituality

Balance Sheets should balance.

Body-building, like LIFE, is about balance and symmetry (harmony). All the muscles need to flow and you 'paint a picture of the 'flow of muscle' when you're on stage. Building muscle is hard but not s hard as attaining balance and symmetry.

I have had some experience with balance sheets, my first university degree was in Business. I also spent a number of years working for large multi-national corporations advising and consulting towards best practises.

If there is one thing I know very well with balance sheets, it’s that balance sheets should balance. Right? The right side must equal the left. Debits and credits should balance.

We constantly read and see in the daily news large corporations going ‘bust’ or even countries in recent times, sometimes not just Third World countries. Big banks who loaned out monies to help finance these businesses or countries have to suddenly ‘write-off’ millions and millions of dollars for debts gone bad. They would have likely set a provision for bad debtors in their balance sheet in the likelihood of debts not being recovered.

When a bank does this, it is known in accounting as good practise and in compliance with accounting standards. The lenders are said to be prudent.

I have always wondered what it would be like if this approach should also be applied to us individuals, in every area of our lives. I mean if some person has done you harm, must we retaliate with the same or worse force? Or should we set aside a provision (like doubtful debts in the balance sheet) for such actions to be ‘written-off’ against and forgiven?

There are many examples over the last two decades at the least, of companies demonstrating how accounting can be more of a creative art than a science.

Balance sheets should balance like a great body-builders physique should be balanced and harmonious (symmetrical).

What is your “spiritual net worth?”

As a Christian I was told in my early years of religious teachings that I will be held accountable for all my actions (sins and good) before entering the kingdom of heaven. This was my first introduction to balance sheets.

It seems that most if not all religions have similar teachings about each individual’s accountability at the end of his or her life. I have always thought that if this were the case and that most of us believe it so, then maybe, it would be a good idea to stop, reflect on past transactions (like a good Accountant), and draw up a ‘personal balance sheet’.

A personal balance sheet, maybe say, quarterly. An interim set of accounts for YOU. Drawn up from a trial balance consisting of what you have ‘taken’ on one side and ‘what you have ‘given’ back to life. A chance to review past transactions (behavioural patterns) to help predict the future. Each side of the trial balance should balance, after all …

.. balance sheets should balance.

You will find that there are some amongst us that just take and keep taking, with very little to give. I’m not talking about money here, even though this could also be considered in this point. I’m referring specifically to a person’s spiritual balance sheet. Your spiritual net worth, when you are held accountable at the gates of the after-life (whatever religion you follow).

Have you considered this?

What if God came through and acted like the large banks, with proper accounting practises of ‘writing off’ bad debts? What if your spiritual net worth was in the negative (in accounting terms)? Should you be collapsed like business gone bankrupt without any chance to continue? Should your life end, right there?

Should the receivers be called in? Or do you think you should be given some ‘slack’ because you hope to get better and can expect to get in spiritual surplus in the next accounting period? I know I prefer the latter. I’m sure we all do. Aren’t we all fortunate that we have such a God?

It nice to know that that is how God operates, isn’t it? Your sins (and mine) and all the bad debts(deeds) will be forgiven. Forgiven but not forgotten. He sent his only begotten son to live and die amongst us so that all sins may be forgiven, for all of time (this is our provision for doubtful debts taken care of).

This is prudent spiritual banking but very smart banking, I think.

Give and take. You should always take a interim account of your life. Is it in “balance?”

So, I’ll ask again, what is your balance sheet, your spiritual balance sheet?

Do an interim set of your spiritual balance sheet to assess how you’re going. It may just help you lower the risk of sinking to a spiritual net worth deficit. Not a good place to be. If you’re in this predicament, seek ways to start ‘giving back’ to life to balance off what you have ‘taken’. Seek balance in your life, spiritual balance.

Balance your spiritual balance sheet and watch how more balanced life will love you back. Spirit, after all equates with or equals LIFE. Specifically quality of life. When you lose your spiritual balance, you lose or lack those qualities we all refer to as spiritual. You become devoid of humanity, love and self-respect. At the worst, you may become selfish or even violent.

So, don’t leave it until it’s too late. Do an interim spiritual balance sheet TODAY. I believe if you do so, it will help you align YOU with life better, with the life’s energy.

Work towards your spiritual net worth surplus.

All the best in your spiritual journey.

Until next time,

Overcoming many small hurdles on your way to achieving your ultimate goal is encouraging. Progress, any form of progress is a motivating factor. So, don't strive for perfection, instead seek progress ... towards your ideal SELF. Vv

Energy

The beauty of truth.

Life is full of labels and titles.

Most people strive all their lives for a better job, better title. It is a symbol of status and progress for a lot of people and society in general. A lot of the time.

Social functions and particularly work-related conferences are filled with grown adults with labels and titles. Everyone designated a status to help with each individual’s perception of reality – their truth.

I have helped people from all levels of society, with a huge range of titles. Yes, I do believe parts of modern day society suffers from status anxiety and you see it shine through in the interaction of people in social settings. Something I have observed in my over two decades in the gym is that, the title or label you have in society is of no use on the gym floor. If you can’t lift a weight, no title can help you.

People don’t need to ‘hide’ behind their titles in the gym, it is a relatively level-playing field. In the gym most people don’t need to pretend to be someone else. It can be simply seen as a place that have individuals with different faces (not titles) there for a common reason: each person being there to help the ‘person they see in the mirror (themselves).

We all get judged on our appearance and the gym floor is no different. It is unfair and most of the time unjust, but it is human nature to judge, based on titles or appearances.

Of course, appearances are deceptive.

Makes me think of one of the poets I studied in my senior year at High School – Keats. I remember a line in one of his poems that has stuck in my head ever since the first time I read it –

“Beauty is truth, truth beauty.”

What a powerful sentence and we can only wonder what Keats was thinking when he wrote this or just marvel at the intelligence behind his thinking. The sentence itself is beauty personified – elegant, balanced, simple and complex. It says so little, yet so much.

It could be interpreted in many ways but I have always believed Keats was saying that the truth of who you are will always speak more strongly than what you look like. Who you are will always triumph eventually over your appearance.

I believe or choose to believe that the truth will always shine through over appearance, whether it be titles or visual appearance.

So, maybe there is genius in that Keats statement. The genius is that we all need to be TRUE. That you need to be true to no one else. That you need to be TRUE TO YOU.

And how do you do that?

A good place to start is to know your philosophy and be true to the beliefs that stem from this philosophy. Your actions, habits and character and ultimately where you end up in life, all flow from this.

So, being true to the best in yourself, I believe, allows you to get closer to the essence of life. Some people discover this essence early in life and some only become aware of this truth for the first time at their death bed. Some never do.

Sad, but true.

But to be true to you, to be true to your beliefs is not easy in today’s world. To be true to the essence of things is very difficult. To be true to you is to ‘know thyself’ as the Greek philosopher and scientist – Thales, stated.

This is one of the most difficult jobs of every single human being – to know oneself, to increase awareness of oneself. Very difficult because everywhere around us, every single person we meet, every single day, we are reminded of our titles and labels – telling each of us who each of us is ‘supposed to be’.

Seek truth, understand that beauty is balance and symmetry in practise. Apply and adapt this (balance and symmetry/harmony) in all areas in the life that you live.

You don’t need titles and labels for this reality, just to keep up appearances. You just need to change your perception (through knowing yourself). Your perception after all determines your reality.

This is the beauty of truth: Know thyself.

Until next time,

a better life, action, authenticness, awareness, belief systems, change, choices, Energy, genuineness, life, long-term perspective, man, perspective, real man, you

Mr Vulnerable.

My son and I.
One of my responsibilities as a man and dad is to make my son aware that being vulnerable is ok.
Vv.

Real Man

Father’s Day came and went only last weekend.

I had a great day with my wife and my two children. I received two beautifully hand-made cards from each of my children and loads of hugs and kisses. Oh, and some of my favourite chocolates.

It was lovely.

I trust all the dads reading this and dads all around the world had a wonderful time with the people they love the most too.

The special calendar day (just like Mother’s Day) got me thinking about being a man but especially in today’s world. Not all men are fathers and not all men are dads but all men are men. So, I got thinking about being a man.

Yep, let’s attempt to re-evaluate the question, “What is a real man?”

In particular, what it means to be vulnerable and still be a man… what it means to be “Mr Vulnerable” and where, how and why it can be incorporated in to the ‘man’ that YOU are.

Every second of every minute of every hour of every day …. of the rest of our lives allows you, me and every man out there to be vulnerable and it may be one of the most important characteristics that we can adopt (if you haven’t considered adopting it already).

The thing is that most of us would have been raised with a definition of what society (modern-day societies) defines it as. This definition is dare I say, unrealistic and quite a burden for the modern male to wear. So much so that I believe the modern day man is finding it quite difficult to be a man.

Now, we could look in many places for possible definitions of what a real man is and justifiably so. Some men look for these in sports stars, movie stars, politicians and so forth. I believe it is important for the modern male (whether you’re a dad or not) to truly understand what it is to be a man. A real man.

Olivia and Zachary enjoying their time with Ruby.
Being a role model for my children is one of the most important responsibilities I will ever have in my life.
For the rest of my life.
Just like it is for every other dad out there.

A Real Man’s John

I thought that one place many people wouldn’t be brave enough to seek an answer is the bible (unless you’re a Christian). We don’t have to look any further than the disciple – John. John, I believe displayed 6 characteristics of what it means to be a real man. In no particular order they were: sincerity, simplicity, conviction, courage, vision and vulnerability.

There you have it! Six Key traits of a real man.

From my experience with people in predominantly male-dominant gyms over the last 23 years, I have found that one thing that men struggle with is accepting that being vulnerable is ok. It seems that the modern man is told since birth that being vulnerable is a no-no, that it is a sign of weakness. Today’s ‘macho’ man of western society must not show vulnerability, he never admits a mistake.

What a load of you know what! Generation after generation of men still believe in this cr#p. Very unrealistic burden for men to carry partially dictated by societal definition of a modern man.

I recall reading research done in America a little while back that stated that five of the most difficult statements for today’s modern man to make are:

I don’t know
I was wrong
I need help
I’m afraid
I’m sorry

Masculinity

This certainly supports what I have deduced from my observations of the last two decades. It seems that modern day men have a problem with admitting vulnerability. That for some reason, if they do their masculinity is brought in to question.

For you Christians reading this – wasn’t this a test for the disciple John which he passed with flying colours?

I think John’s vulnerability was so great beyond belief in his extreme demonstration of humility when he said in reference to Jesus “He must become greater; I must become less”. You cannot get much better than that with someone being so humble.

A trait that is truly missing in the world today.

So, don’t be afraid to be vulnerable, to be authentic to no one else but you first. It is good for the soul and makes you a real man. A humble man is not afraid to admit it. A humble man is not afraid to admit he is or was wrong.

There is a real man in all men reading this and all the men in the world. However, to reach deep down inside and get him, you need to become more aware of who you are now and take actions (sufficient and appropriate) to change certain habits that may not be aligned with the definitions of a real man I have given.

The important step then is to be flexible enough and ‘man-enough’ to adapt to the ‘man you imagine yourself to be’, ideally a man closer to the kind John was. It’s not easy, matter of fact it is darn hard work but the end result is a thing of beauty. And this is one of the things the world needs more of right now.

This, however, may clash with the current modern day definition of what it means to be a real man.

Me and my two children – Olivia and Zachary. I love them with all my heart.

The Future needs you, Real Men

Be the real man you know you are.

Be inspirational to you first, so that you can be inspirational to the young males that are searching for examples of what it means to be a Real Man. Don’t let them get lost to men of lesser character. So, all you dads out there or men playing a surrogate role, be the role model, be the Real Man that the legions of young boys and future men of our society need to aspire to. The Future needs you, Real Men.

This is not a want.

This is a need that our modern day society needs now more than ever. More Real Men to help provide a template to the youth of tomorrow, especially with so many possible definitions are being filtered in to their young minds. Give them a template, like that which the disciple John gave us to build on and stand the test of time.

If every man reading this and every man in this world took this responsibility seriously, what a beautiful world I can imagine for us all in two or three decades. When young men of today, modelling their characters off you – the modern day Real Man will be leaders of tomorrow.

Me and my young man … the future of Real Men. The future rests with us Real Men of the present. …. to provide a template … to save the Father’s of tomorrow.
Play your part, your role for eternity

It is a great hope of mine.

It’s not too late. Make the change because you know it is the right thing to do and you’re humble enough and courageous enough to do it.

Why?

Because you’re Mr Vulnerable. You’re the man! (and if you’re a woman and you’re reading this, get your man to read it too).

All the best in your journey towards being a Real Man. It lies within every man, so go ahead and bring Mr Vulnerable out and share him with the world.

Because the world needs YOU to.

It’s time ….

Until next time,

Cheers & Ahoy!

With the next generation of Valentine males – Zachary.

Energy

Why the idea of spending “quality time” is a misguided maxim.

That’s correct – you either make time or you don’t. There is no ‘in-between’. You have 86,400 seconds a day. That is a constant based on our limited understanding of time.

Time does not stop for any man or woman. Every second ticks away.

I argue that there is no such thing as spending ‘quality time’ with someone or something because at the core, the idea of substituting quality time for quantity time DOES NOT work in Real Life.

I have heard it many times over my 40 years on this planet – the line “oh, I like to spend some quality time with my wife or husband or partner or child”. What sort of cop-out statement is that?! I mean, you either ‘make time’ or you don’t. Period!

It is a misguided statement.

A day out with Zachary at Luna Park, Sydney – “Daddy-son” time. What a day it was for both of us!
Quantity leads to quality when it comes to any relationship.

The less quantity time you make to devote to your mate/wife/husband/children/grand-children and so forth, the tougher it is to CREATE quality time together. You see the awkwardness in social gatherings like Christmas and Weddings and Funerals.

If only people could all sit down and proclaim after not seeing each other for so long “Now we are all going to have a quality experience together.”

Wishful thinking.

You can manipulate many things in life, but Real Life cannot be manipulated that way when it comes to time – investment quantity of your time/life in the people you care about most dearly in your life. This is where ‘actions/time/effort speaks louder than words/excuses.’

You cannot make up lost time. It is lost. You just have to make the best decisions with the time you have left. It is a choice after all.

We see it regularly and get daily reminders on the news, talk shows, talent shows, history books and even religious books like the bible – we see great moments of human achievement. We read about these achievements but we are not made aware of the details, the details of the years of preparation and hard work and focus that lead up to it.

No, it does not make for good reading or the selling of news. People want to read about the ‘over-night’ successes. Think back over your life experiences and your achievements. You may talk about the achievement of a certain qualification or reaching a pivotal height in your field of speciality but talk about how hard you worked and the hurdles you had to overcome to get there is not normally spoken about.

So much is written about and passed down through history and stories of these major achievements (you read about it with the great Presidents, Business Leaders, Biblical characters and important events, Army Generals and Thinkers of history). This is wonderful but I think it is a bit skewed.

At the pool with my munchkins – Zachary and Olivia. Learning the basics of swimming with me.
Your children are the most important investments you will ever make in your life (for those with kids).
Quantity of time spent leads to quality of relationship, in any relationship.

More should be written about and spoken about the ‘day-to-day happenings’. Of normal daily life. More should be documented of the ‘before’ and ‘after’ of day-to-day experiences just like we see in weight-loss advertisements. The many hurdles that every parent reading this faces and overcomes on a daily basis with the raising of their children.

Too many make a big thing about future holiday travels and special events/plans and only recognise these ‘moments in time’ just like the history teller. You see, the way I see it, if you’re not careful, you can try to live your life from one ‘great experience’ to another. Lovely but an almost impossible dream to seek. Just like success, the very pursuit of it is futile.

It just cannot be done and is a waste of your time – your appreciation of the gift of the ‘present time’.

In Real Life, I believe it is the mundane, day-to-day moments and experiences that make up your 86,400 seconds a day that matters most. It is these experiences that make the highlights in your year stand out. It is the quantity time spent with loved ones that can only make possible the concept of ‘quality time’. It is these experiences that children remember the most.

Covering their dad in sand

Many years ago, I learned that I needed to use my personal time mostly at home, where I am close to my wife and family. If I am going to stay true to my priorities which are aligned with my philosophy on life, the use of my “personal time” has to be purposeful and focused as the use of my business time.

Stay true to your philosophy of life and ensure that you establish and maintain your priorities with regards to the use of your 86.400 seconds per day. Ensure that you devote and invest those seconds to the people you value most in your life.

This will help you find the amount of time to strengthen all your most valuable relationships in your life. Investing more actual time in the day-to-day activities with loved ones may just save your relationship.

As someone once said strive to “make the ordinary, extraordinary”.

After all, there are only two true power variables in life:

Time
Energy

You need to become a better manager of your SELF with regards to these.

Quality time is only possible if you have spent quantity time.

Manage your funnel better and make better decisions as to where you spend your quantity of time, hopefully with those whom you value the most – like your wife, husband, partner or children.

Quality evolves from quantity. The inverse relationship is close to impossible.

Until next time,

Paul

Guess where we are?
The Sydney Harbour bridge in the background – at one of our nearby favourite playgrounds.

~~Life & Lifestyle COACH~~

a better life, accountability, action, anger, anger management, awareness, balance, Beliefs, breaking points, care empathy, choices, ego, Energy, game of life, hulk, Leader, leadership, life, love, man, manners, patience, real man, relationships, respect, responsibility, risk, self discipline, self improvement, self love, self-respect, taking action, trust, you, your life

When to unleash your “HULK”.

The “Most Muscular” (HULK) pose in the sport of Body-building.
Roaarrr!!!

We all get angry now and then.

That’s something everyone reading this blog and every citizen of the world have in common. I have always been fascinated with the Marvel Universe characters, one of which is the “Hulk”. To a little extent, I like to imagine that every person has a super-hero in them. That we all have some superhero power.

In this blog, I would argue that there is a Hulk in every one of us.

What’s important is not that we all have that Hulk that could awaken at a moment’s notice but that we get better at managing that Hulk – that anger. Knowing when to unleash your Hulk.

You see, in dealing with thousands of people of all ages in all walks of life in more than two decades in the gym environment, one of the observations I have made is that different people use anger to hide different feelings. The interesting thing is that a lot of times a lot of people don’t know the real reason they are angry.

Think about you when you get angry. Do you use anger to cover different emotions at different times?

Having children brings out the best in every parent and I think many, if not all parents reading this would agree. This includes the best of ‘anger’ too. Having children teaches you many things, one of which is patience and your tolerance for it. “Zachary, can you stop kicking the car seat please!” and then a few minutes later … “For the hundredth time, Zachary, stop kicking the car seat please!”.

Your patience is constantly tested by your children as you do your best to control that lever that releases the Hulk or anger. It is a daily constant battle at times.

Two principles of building muscle: 1) Simplicity and 2} Continuity.
Become aware; Apply action: Adapt accordingly.

In this phase of his life, my son’s curiosity encourages him to push limits – push beyond his own physical, mental and emotional limits and also push us – my wife and I, beyond our limits too. An interesting phase in our lives to say the least.

I have learned that, as parents, we MUST be permissive to our children’s feelings while setting limits to their action, when appropriate. One of the problems most, if not, all parents face is: when to use discipline and when to GIVE IN; when to be firm and when to be easy; when to give TOUGH LOVE and when to show CARE AND EMPATHY.

At one point or another, we all find ourselves asking ourselves the question: “Is this the moment to be accepting and empathise so that my child will not be afraid of his feelings?” or “should I put my foot down so he understands that he cannot get away with this?”

What I have found is that there are NO SET RULES TO FOLLOW.

Each situation must be handled separately but this is not as difficult as it sounds.

As an owner of a gym for 7 years, I found myself constantly resolving conflicts – conflicts between members, conflicts between members and their family members, internal conflicts of members and conflicts in general. What I found was that the first response I chose to a situation SET THE TONE for how traumatically an event will be taken. I have also found that this is a very good approach to keep in mind when dealing with children too.

It seems to work with my ability to manage conflicts with my two kids.

When one of my children is hurting, I have found that compounding it by reacting with angry words or action (and letting the HULK out) does not add to the solution. Instead, responding with initial softness and empathy, helps more. I think it allows the child to see that if me or my wife (Dad or mum) aren’t panicking, maybe, just maybe, there is a light at the end of the tunnel.

The philosophy you follow heavily influences whether you achieve your goals in life or not.

Where does this ability to be permissive and initiate softness and keep from panicking come from? It comes from WITHIN. The same place the HULK lies dormant. It is a choice. It is a choice that is made by you, the parent, in the good times – the quiet times. That is the best time. The best time to decide on how you respond to a child’s mis-behaviour.

Because if you didn’t decide on such an approach/response or similar, then chaos would prevail and anger or the Hulk will be default system you will react on. There isn’t time to think about ways to prevent a fire, in the MIDDLE OF A FIRE!

If you’re religious, you will believe that GOD works all things unto good.

So, when difficulty first happens, don’t lecture your children, panic or commence scolding. Allowing them to feel the hurt, the anger and initially responding to their behaviour with calm comforting lays an important foundation. A foundation that will allow them to find value in their experience.

Yes, it is much easier to just release the HULK, but it takes a lot of strength to keep it at bay. Calmness comes from within. For you Christians or members of other religious denominations reading this, calmness comes from God’s word. For those of you not so religiously inclined, think of this calmness as being already a part of you. Part of your “inner-self”.

THERE IS A TIME AND PLACE FOR GENUINE, APPROPRIATE ANGER. There is a time and place to let the HULK out. For instance, most of us would respond to injustice and cruelty with anger. Healthy anger can be channelled towards constructively making our world a better place to live in. Healthy anger can be transmuted when one trains with weights. This is one of the un-sung benefits of weight-training with moderate to heavy weights. When executed properly, negative energy (anger) is transmuted through the iron and replaced with a charge of positive energy and vitality.

Anger or the HULK, when released with the appropriate intensity and direction is very positive and a good thing. This is partly because painful trials or conflicts that challenge the threat of the release of our anger/the HULK, produces something encouraging. It produces maturity and growth.

This maturity and growth ultimately leads to LOVE.

Your challenge: become better at controlling the Hulk within. Don’t be afraid to let it out and work on becoming increasingly aware of when to unleash your Hulk. But, only release your Hulk – when appropriate, and with a proportional response.

Roaarrrrr!!!

Until next time,

Energy

Do you scratch when you get an itch?

Side Chest.

Every now and then, I get a part of my body that just has an irritating itch. Yes – itch!

Have you ever felt an itch? Well, just yesterday the skin around the top part of the knuckle of my left toe started to itch just before dinner. When I felt that first tingling sensation, I thought, “oh no, please don’t star!” I’ve had many over the years and I have always thought of these itches like never-ending tickles.

Painful but pleasurable.

Now, I am going to share this itch story with you because I think experiencing an itch explains certain elements of life. How, sometimes (and we all know people like this – people that turn an ant hill in to a mountain!). How something that is triggered by a small event and instantly takes you to another part of the world.

You see, that little scratch is now a day old sore. Yep, a sore that has a scab on it. Don’t you think it’s quite irritating? I mean, if you’ve ever had one – an itch, that is (and you probably have at one point in your life so far), it is a cycle of pain. I mean, that small itch gets scratched, and this makes it more itchy, which then forces you to scratch even more and more until you’re literally in pain and you can’t take it anymore.

A never-ending cycle, how awful is that!

Something so small, but causes so much havoc!

Progress shots of the ‘back double biceps’ pose prior to contest. Most think body-building is an individual sport. I don’t agree. It is a team sport : all the muscles have to work together, to flow ‘as one’ towards balance and symmetry.

I think this phenomenon somewhat explains how so much of so many people’s lives and actions are based on assertions that have a basis of fear. Assertions are beliefs that are postulated but have no hard facts to support it. There is no evidence and is similar to when people ‘blow things out of proportion’ when something goes wrong or they anticipate the worst-case scenario. We all know these kinds of people.

You may be one of them.

People that turn that little itch (slight error, hurdle, challenge in life) into something huge before it even happens. Created in their minds – in a world they invented for themselves. I think we may have all been guilty of this at one or more points in our lives, depending on the situation we had faced.

These base-less fears spin out of control like the little itch spins you out of control … in a cycle of pain. The itch is firstly a bother, the scratch feels good, and so you repeat this forever, until you are bleeding (happened to my toe).

Just like the itch, worrying about something that has not happened (anxiety) and probably will never happen does not serve you.

Also, sometimes getting assurance that something or some event (that you’re anxious about) wouldn’t happen may not serve you as well as you think it would. I think sometimes, getting assurance that something will not occur or happen will make things worse. Just like that itch, you will come up with further areas that somehow needed assurance too. This cycle may never end until somebody gets hurt.

Just like that little itch.

Side Triceps pose in the heat of competition at the 2007 World Natural Bodybuilding Contest held in NY, USA.
Represented Australia.
Ranked: 4th Best Natural Bodybuilder in the World.
Repeated this in 2008.

Sometimes, the best thing to do is to just LEAVE IT ALONE!

Yes, just leave the itch alone. Don’t scratch it. Don’t do anything to it. Now this is more difficult than it sounds. It goes against every fibre in your bone to just let an itch be. To sit and not scratch. To sit and just experience the discomfort, the pain. Teach yourself to BE COMFORTABLE BEING UNCOMFORTABLE. This is something I have always believed in and I remind my students of this in the gym when I tell them that a little bit of discomfort is a GOOD THING.

So, whether it be a physical itch on your body or you stressing yourself and experiencing fear of an event that has not occurred yet (suffering from anxiety). Sometimes the best thing to do is like that Beatles song goes … just “LET IT BE” .

And when is the best time to stop this cycle of pain?

Right at the beginning. Choose not to scratch. Choose not to get assurance about your anxiety. Accept it. Experience it. Enjoy it (in a strange way).

Slow the urge to scratch the itch. Quiet the mind. Just LET IT BE.

Guess what happens eventually? Well, nothing lasts forever. Time heals everything.

The itch will stop itching. What you had anxiety over will highly likely not happen. Your assertion will remain just that: an assertion. Not based on facts.

So, don’t scratch your itch. Arm yourself with the thought that the itch has a finite life, that it will eventually come to an end and the pain will be no more. But you will wake up tomorrow and … Life will go on.

It always does.

Until next time,

At the Asia Pacific Natural Bodybuilding Championships.
Placing: 2nd
Photo: Top 5 – middle weight.

A former student of mine. Mother of 2 two young children with a dream to BE HER BEST. To find the CHAMPION LYING DORMANT WITHIN HER. After 8 years of total devotion to motherhood, I helped her, help herself realize her dream in less than 10 months. She placed 2nd in NSW in Figure in a very tough line up. A great student who believed. Believed in herself. Believed in my program. Believed in her dream. Well done champ!

A former student of mine. Mother of two young children with a dream to BE HER BEST. To find the CHAMPION LYING DORMANT WITHIN HER.
After 8 years of total devotion to motherhood, I helped her, help herself realize her dream in less than 10 months.
She placed 2nd in NSW in Figure in a very tough line up.
A great student who believed. Believed in herself. Believed in my program. Believed in her dream.
Well done champ!

adequate sleep, Energy, life, sleep

Sleeping – there’s just no escaping it.

A good teacher is hard to find but finding a good student is even harder.
Plan the work – to work the plan.
Photo: discussing fine points of one of my programs with retired legend of rugby – Phil Waugh.
Ex-Australian Wallaby & Waratahs Captain. A living legend of the sport of rugby.

A large part of most our lives is sleeping.

If you sleep eight hours a day and live to sixty, you would have slept 20 years of your life away. Wow, it’s quite sobering when you view it this way, isn’t it? I’ve always believed that each of us should sleep the right amount – adequate: nothing more, nothing less. Just adequate amounts of sleep. But how do you know what is ‘adequate’? What is ‘right’ for you? How many hours do you sleep every day – this does not include the hours you lay in bed playing with your phone or reading or ..?

It is a personal thing, a personal habit after-all.

In this era of ever-increasing distractions through the advancing technologies, people are finding it increasingly difficult to ‘switch-off’ and enjoy a restful, uninterrupted sleep. We all do it every day but a vast number of people have forgotten how to ‘have a good night’s sleep’.

People are really struggling to adopt and implement good sleeping habits and most are not sure of how to get them too. Very sad and very dangerous, indeed. When you lose control of one of our most basic needs – sleep, you increase your overall ‘life risk’.

But why? Why are more people having poorer sleeping habits?

Feeling the ‘essence!’
Practise does not make perfect. PERFECT PRACTISE MAKES PERFECT.

There are many contributing factors, yes. There is no escaping it: sleeping is a ‘mini-death sentence’ we all have to regularly serve. Ideally, every single day. If this true then I would have thought that more people would be learning and investigating the best ways to get good sleeping habits. I mean, the average person would sleep 1/3 of their day away, it makes good sense to learn and implementing good habits, wouldn’t it?

The good news is it’s never too late to learn or re-learn.

You would probably have your own unique way of ‘falling asleep’. Well and good. Some of you (like me), could just transport your mind back to your early child-hood and imagine the way you fell asleep most nights. For me, I re-live the lovely, caressing hands of my grandmother massaging my body all over whilst humming a traditional song. It has NEVER FAILED ME. I fall asleep ALL THE TIME!

Don’t underestimate the importance of adequate levels of sleep in your daily life. The body, mind, heart and spirit all need ‘time-out’ and recovery time (for those of you who use weights to train, sleep/rest is vital to maximising muscle recovery and growth) to function optimally. Time-out to encourage longevity. Time-out to enhance your vitality. Time-out to allow you to be AT YOUR BEST. Time-out to evolve, to grow to adapt. Time-out to love – you, your loved ones and life. Time-out to generate zest in your life!

We all need time-out. We all need sleep and good rest.

It seems that there is an inverse relationship with increasing technology people’s abilities to sleep. Yes, to simply sleep! It’s not that simple anymore for a lot of people. Maybe, you? Whilst a lot of modernites are moving in to a ‘minimalist’ age, there still seems to be a struggle with this one habit: learning HOW TO SLEEP WELL. What used to be simple has been made complex!

Loading the ‘guns’ with proper execution.

And whose fault is it? Partly yours, partly mine, partly everybody’s. We all consume these products and we need to embrace it – yes. However, it seems that the more accessible people are to advancing and new technologies, the less able they are in managing their habits of good sleeping. Matter of fact, many people are applying bad habits of sleeping. Most are struggling to just sleep!

“What is the answer here?” you may be thinking. Well, I think, just like any other source of energy, you must become a better manager of the energy, the tool. You are in control, don’t let it control you. This can be more difficult than it sounds for a lot of people though as advancing technology also means that ‘personal/family time’ is now being invaded by employers. You’re working even when you’re ‘not at work (physically).

That is the life now. That’s just how it is. If that is the path you choose, then that is one of the drawbacks to the increasing use of advancing technologies: an uninvited, invasion of personal time/life (which may include ‘sleeping time’ too). Remember, I did say that it’s a choice: It’s YOUR CHOICE. It’s YOUR LIFE, after-all.

So, if you’re not getting adequate sleep or ‘time-out’, please do yourself (and your family) a favour and seek help. Seek help from the relevant professionals and services available today that may help you with the various sleeping dis-orders that millions of people suffer from every single day. Not seeking help before it is too late could be very costly to you and everyone that depends on you being alive.

The killer is: the compounding effect of continuous less than adequate sleep over weeks, months, years.

Life is not just about living longer, it is also about pumping life (vitality) in to the years you have left. One very important habit that ADDS VALUE to your life is sleep, adequate sleep. You can ‘pump life back in to you’ by getting consistent adequate levels of sleep. It’s not the quantity of hours that matter, it is the quality of your sleep.

So, if you have increased disruptions in your sleep due to say, insomnia – seek help. Not next year, today. The disastrous result of the compound effect of continuously being sleep deprived can strike at any time. Without warning. Boom!

All the very best in your decision regarding the adoption of good sleeping habits, in the time you have left on this planet.

Choose well.

Until next time,

Another view of the “front-double biceps’ pose.

~~Life COACH~~

Energy

The STAR WARS within.

Have you watched Star Wars?

We’ve all seen a bit of Star Wars at some point growing up. Even if you’re not an avid fan, you would have heard or learned that Darth Vader and his tribe was on the ‘Dark Side’. A show that pitted the good Force against the Evil/Dark Force.

I believe such wars rages within each and every one of us with varying intensities throughout our lives. It is challenging during puberty but really rages between the mid-to-late 30s and late 40s. This STAR WARS battle happens within us. Not out in space, fighting wars in space-ships like in the movies.

No, this is a movie closer to home – to earth, to each individual, being played out within each of us. You, me. Everyone. Deep down inside each and every one of us …. there is a battle between the Forces of Good and the Evil – Dark Side.

I see this Dark Side in very young children too. In my observation of my children and just children in general, I have observed certain traits in them that I do believe rests in everyone until the day we die. It just stays dormant for parts of our lives. If you dug deep down inside of you, to the place that very few people go, what would you see?

I think these traits observable in young kids and toddlers are brought to the fore during this period of 30s to 40s. It is also enacted in the tumultuous teen years. This particular blog message is aimed at people in this age bracket (mid-30s to late 40s) but it could also be a point to reminisce about for those who are 50 and beyond. It could also serve as a forewarning for those in the teens and twenties.

So, what do you think you will see?

Mind-muscle connection through ‘flexing the muscles’ in a “most-muscular’ pose.
Chris is an A+ student and the results show for a 47 year old man.
On his way to realizing a physique and mind-set he imagines himself having.
… adopting my framework to body/mind re-engineering.
Vv

I think we would ‘see’ inside of us what we all know is there but wished wasn’t. We have that Dark Side. I think deep down, we have a lot more in common with Darth Vader and his tribe than we all care to admit.

If we looked deep enough, I believe you know you will find the similarities you have with Darth Vader and very young children and that we all:

Are greedy
Are selfish
Are competitive
Are fearful
Are dependent
Have a destructive side
Are possessive

It can be scary to think that you still have these traits strongly embedded in you throughout your adult-life.

It is even more scarier to dig, deep, deeper than you have ever gone and make it to the Dark Side. I find that we all ‘touch’ on various aspects of the Dark Side throughout our lives but it is more prominent in the 40s.

From what I know about this decade from helping people as they transition through this phase of life in my two decades in the gym, it can be difficult. I have journeyed with them, feeling their ups and downs and almost as if I have been through this phase many times over (divorce is an end-result of this Star Wars).

It is an intense and confusing period. It is the second-coming of the hormonally charged, roller-coaster ride of the teens.

I think society refer to this period as the “mid-life crisis’. We all go through it. It is not IF we go through it, but WHEN!

It is a period of a re-examination. A re-examination of ALL THAT WE THINK AND STAND FOR.

Why?

Well, it seems that it is ultimately to discover the ‘true self’. It is the search for individual identity. A search for our own uniqueness. A search for authentic-ness. A search to find the identity that is authentically ours and ours alone.

It is a battle, a real battle – even bloody at times. An internal battle. But, just as you get closer to discovering, an internal resistance builds up. This internal resistance is ‘alien-like’. Foreign. I think Men and women travelling through this phase feel an ‘alien-like resistance primarily because of the Fear of what we may find, of what truth we may discover about ourselves.

Sometimes, it is just easier to ‘busy’ ourselves so that we do not have to make this discovery. Of ourselves.

It appears by the end of the 40 decade (if you don’t realize it at the start), we all come to a singular realization that WE STAND ALONE. We stand alone (and we always have been but only just come to the realization) in this battle, this internal battle. This is not a battle that we need a gun for but it is a very critical point for all of us – all of men and women that are travelling through it and will be travelling through in due course.

We ALL realise that WE STAND ALONE. Just like when we die, we DIE ALONE.

We Stand Alone because sooner or later, we discover that we are the only ones with our own set of thoughts and buckets of feelings. No one else have them. We may allow another person to have a taste of these thoughts and feelings through shared experiences and conversations (like I have had with some of the students I have helped in the gyms over the years).But that is all they can ever hope to get … just a taste.

We all STAND ALONE because we are the only ones who can truly DIGEST our thoughts and feelings. All the way to our grave.

Results with care.
Here, Brad is ‘feeling the essence’ of the exercise and is loading his guns(biceps) through the application of proper technique.
Practise does not make perfect – Perfect practise makes perfect!
Vv

In life, we fundamentally travel alone. We all Stand Alone. Accepting this is a difficult thing to do. But, even though we stand alone during in our thoughts, you ARE NOT ALONE.

Understand this distinction. There are institutions and places and people available today (more than ever before) that can help you through this important but painful transition in life. Places and people that will help you manage the liberation of the dark side in a somewhat controlled, healthy fashion. A less riskier way.

The battle between the Forces of good and evil/Dark Side makes us wonder and ask ourselves the question: Is this all there is? Is this as good as life gets?

I know a lot men and women that I have journeyed with as they transition through this rocky decade have in some way struggled with this thought.

Don’t fret if you don’t find the answer right away. Just know that your parents and grandparents and many generations before you have all been through this phase of life. You just have to be aware of the impending changes and learn or get help with ways to help best manage it.

One thing for certain is that everyone going through this phase of life will likely see the Dark Side, asking to be let out. There is definitely a very serious engagement at play.

The only catch is that you’re the ONLY PLAYER …. Playing many hands!

Playing many hands (in your head), representing the many roles that you have played in your life to that point. You’re comparing and contrasting all relationships you have had to that point, whilst battling with the fear of finding the Real YOU.

A serious game in a serious turning point in the serious game of life.

A serious engagement in the re-evaluation of his or her life. Where he or she goes with this … is anyone’s guess. Anyone’s bet.

Everywhere you look, there is a betting agency sprouting up odds on everything and anything in life – live sports entertainment is immensely backed up by these betting businesses. It seems many believe life is a game of chance.

Are you game to chance your life on a bet? Are you a betting person … in this game of life? What risks are you willing to take? Place your bets!

Choose well my friend …. Your life depends on it.

Until next time,

Retired rugby legend: Ex-Australian Wallaby & Waratahs Champion Captain & True Leader – Phil Waugh.
Setting his own standards of excellence in all areas of his life, following my framework.
A champion such as Phil is celebrated because we recognize that he has overcome personal ambition through sacrifice and dedication to higher principles – higher standards.
Great leaders & champion sportsmen and women like Phil, can awaken awareness of the principle of higher standards that rests within the heart of every man and woman.
AWaken yours today towards THE BEST YOU CAN BE with one of my programs!

~~Life COACH~~

awareness, belief systems, Beliefs, Energy, life, you

Do you believe in miracles?

So, do you believe in miracles or not?

I shared with you a story about my near-death experience in an earlier blog “I.Am.Nothing” and I mentioned that I would share with you the second story of the point I was trying to emphasise in that blog. The point being: that we are not alone, that ‘I am” does not exist …. That we are all outlying ‘balls of consciousnesses all connected (to various degrees and intensities) to the greater consciousness. This higher energy field. This Higher Force. This Universal Consciousness. Let’s just refer to it as: the Universe.

Let’s begin with a little hypothesis: We are ALL – ONE!

Well, that same friend I introduced in “I.Am.Nothing.” that asked me that loaded question regarding his realization that “I am” was not what it seemed was also part of this next story. What transpired reinforced my belief that I was and am part of something ‘bigger than me. That ‘me’ – this physical self that I know as ‘me’ was not really the ‘true me’.

It happened a few years after that ‘near-death experience’ I described in “I.Am.Nothing”. I asked the question of whether you believed in miracles. Well, do you? Or do you think that meaning links mind and matter like two sides of the same coin? That what we interpret as a ‘miracle’ is really just an example of the limits of our perception.

What I am about to share with you, some may consider a “miracle’. You decide …

Now, I told you that I have always loved mathematics and still do. I love the power of reasoning that you develop as you delve more and more in to it. Mathematics explains life (but I will go more into this in later blogs) but also helps you become a better student of life.

I remember being fascinated with mathematics all the way from kindergarten, through Primary and Secondary School. This love for it showed in my excellent placings in examinations throughout school years (I placed in the Top 2/3 of most of my subjects and in particular – Mathematics).

I loved it so much that I majored in Mathematics along with Physics in my first years at University. This friend of mine (who lives only 5 minutes from me today) was also doing a similar undergraduate degree as I was. He is a pretty good mathematician too.

This story is about an exam I took in my 2^nd year at University. It was an advanced Calculus/Algebra mathematics examination. A 3 hour exam at the end of a semester. My friend did this same exam too. A pretty difficult, high pressured exam.

I am sharing you this because I believe what transpired reinforced my belief that we are not alone. That reality as we ‘see’ it is not what it seems. That we are all a walking, talking, sleeping, eating, sh%tting … “balls of energy/consciousness”.

Up until now, I have only shared this story with my wife, close friends and some family members.

In retrospect, two weeks before the exam date, I had a strange feeling come over me. I felt quite different. I wasn’t sure what to make of it. I remember I didn’t feel like ‘hanging out’ with my mates or anyone else for that matter. I just seemed to be very focused.

I seemed to have an increased awareness of everything – internally and externally. I had a part-time job as an aerobics/body pump instructor and ran an aquarobics business at the University pool. Apart from this and my workouts, I seemed to have had an increased and somewhat overwhelming passion and love for mathematics in the two weeks leading up to the exam.

Like I said, I felt quite different. It was a strange feeling. It felt very weird. Something, an energy, a sense of vitality that I hadn’t felt since that moment in the car 2 years before that.

This was 20 years ago.

Retired Ex-Australian Wallaby & Waratahs Champion Captain & Leader – Phil Waugh.
Setting his own standards of excellence in all areas of his life, following my framework.
Champions such as Phil are celebrated because we recognize that they have overcome personal ambition through sacrifice and dedication to higher principles – higher standards.
Great leaders & sportsmen and women like Phil, can awaken awareness of the principle of higher standards that rests within the heart of every man and woman.
Awaken yours today!

I don’t remember sitting the 3 hour high-level mathematics exam. I cannot recall anything that transpired during that exam and to some extent leading up to it. I remember how I felt though, I felt an amazing sense of euphoria and an almost fearless sense of intense awareness. There was a confidence level that was beauty personified. I felt this same thing about 11 years later when I represented Australia at the World Natural Bodybuilding Championships in New York.

A feeling of ‘one-ness’ with the universe. Being in what seemed to be in ‘perfect balance & symmetry’ or in perfect balance in internal/external harmony. It was almost like floating along on the notes of music. In perfect harmony. I seemed to have a condition of infinite power, compassion, gentleness and love.

But I do remember what happened after, very clearly.

At that time, the internet was still young. Exam results would get posted on the faculty notice boards – with the course name, student i.d number and marks awarded. When it was released, I was playing a game of tennis in the mid-day sun. As usual, I had my shirt off (thinking that I would get a sun-tan while I played: killing two birds with one stone, so to speak).

On this particular day, I noticed that groups of students were gathering around and peering through the fence that surrounded the tennis courts. They appeared to be watching my game. Initially, I thought that they were actually watching our game with interest but then more students gathered and now I caught some of them talking to each other and pointing fingers at me.

I didn’t know what to think. A lot of thoughts crossed my mind. I couldn’t believe me and my opponent (who was a top University tennis player) were attracting this growing number of on-lookers. This had never happened before.

I thought that they may have been watching my opponent because of his standing in the tennis fraternity at the University but then he said that they were watching ‘me’.

“Watching me?” I thought. Wow! But, I was only a casual B grade player at best. I wasn’t anything special in tennis, I just enjoy all sports and used it as a form of cardio. Then, I thought that maybe they were admiring my physique and muscles (that I had been working very hard in the gym for). So, I started striking a few ‘body-building’ poses after every point won or lost. Alright girls, here is my ‘front double biceps’! I thought. It didn’t make sense though, the crowd were now clapping for me whether I won or lost the point.

Finally, I walked up to a girl I knew. As I approached her, I noticed a few other faces that I recognised in the large lecture theatre that we had our mathematics lectures in. What was happening, I thought?

I said hi to the girl–friend I knew and asked her what she was doing here watching and why was she and everyone else clapping for me. She then asked me if I had seen the examination results. I said, no. She then smiled and asked me for my i.d number and then said that I had the highest mark. Well, I wasn’t too surprised because I had had first place finishes many times throughout my Primary and Secondary school exams. It wasn’t very new to me.

Then, she said – “No, Paul, you didn’t just get the highest, you got FULL MARKS. You got One hundred per cent!”

Now, I was flabbergasted and shocked with this piece of news. In a 3 hour major calculus/algebra university exam, I got a PERFECT score. Not, 98%, not 99%, not 99.9% …. No, but 100%!

I had to go and see it to believe it.

Helping Chris close the gap between how he imagines himself to be and what he sees in the mirror.
Or in other words: Manifesting the ‘unfolding universe’ of his ‘enfolded’ invisible universe (what he imagines/dreams)

People who I didn’t know, were coming up to me to congratulate me on this achievement. Even the eventual Mathematics Gold Medallist came up to me to shake my hand and ask me how l did it. He only managed 92% and he got the second highest. It was so difficult that less than 20 people (my good friend had 82% and was one of these) out of the hundreds of candidates had greater than 80% (A grade). I told him I didn’t know how.

We were given back our marked exam papers in the lecture theatre. When they called out my name, I received even more applause. The lecturer said that in the history of the University and the history of the mathematics examination and faculty, nothing like this had ever happened. No one had ever got FULL MARKS. No one had got a PERFECT SCORE! But …

I DID. I mean, think about it … I didn’t even have a comma or a derivative mark wrong. It was the perfect exam paper.

If anyone asked me how I did it, even today, I still don’t know how. I honestly DO NOT KNOW HOW I DID IT. I do know, however, that I wasn’t myself in the two weeks leading up to the exam but was heightened during that particular 3 hours (whatever I was feeling ‘peaked’ at this point).

I know one thing: I wasn’t myself, I wasn’t ‘me’ as I knew it. “Me” was part of something greater.

I strongly believe today, that it wasn’t ‘me’ sitting that exam. I believe that I tapped in to consciousness and consciousness ‘worked through me’ to sit the perfect exam. It seemed that I knew the perfect answer to any mathematics question relating to that course. That is the only way I can explain it.

This was another example of when ‘me’ was not ‘me’.

What happened was a mathematical miracle at that time (and still has not been repeated since – a record that may stand the test of time). Like an Olympic record that has never been broken in decades. It was, as some may refer to it – an anomaly.

I won’t take credit for my performance in that exam. It was not ‘me’. I believe I was just a medium through which consciousness transmuted through. It is another story of when my ‘self’ was part of a larger Universal – SELF.

I was truly ONE WITH THE UNIVERSE.

I believe it comes in certain bursts. It is available to all of us. An avenue through heightened sense of awareness and enlightenment. I believe each individual has the potential to allow the transmutation of that energy via the energy-field that is all around us.

Each person just needs to prepare their SELF to facilitate this connection with the Universal Consciousness. Each individual need to develop their recognition tools/mechanism.

When you do, I believe you tap in to great ideas, great innovation, great creativity (that is already there in your subconscious).

You tap in to infinite intelligence.

Tap in to yours today and allow infinite intelligence ‘flow’ through you.

Whether you believe in miracles or not, try to comprehend that the unfolded universe is merely a physical manifestation of the ‘enfolded’ universe within YOU. If you accept that everything is connected with everything else, then, there’s no such thing as an “accident”. Nothing is ‘outside’ the universe. There is no such thing as a ‘miracle’. It is just a limitation of your perception of reality.

So, if everything is connected, it follows that you should watch your thoughts. Be fully aware of your beliefs. Why? Because the critical point in any complex system is that which the least power is required to alter the whole system, for example, a single move of a pawn on the chessboard completely changes the possibilities of the game.

Every detail of your beliefs and your belief system that you hold has consequences for better or for worse in the unfolded universe – in your reality. Work on changing your beliefs if they are not serving you as they did in the past. What served you when you were a child may not serve you now. Let those beliefs go. Be courageous to ‘let go’.

Work towards becoming more aware of the ‘real YOU’ in you and try keeping this formula in mind:

Do what you like to do best, and do it to the very best of your ability. You may just create something in the physical realm that may be referred to as a miracle…. but hopefully after reading this, you’re now questioning that thought pattern.

Until next time,

Manifesting the ‘unfolding universe’ in reality from the unfolded universe (invisible/imaginary).
What’s required to achieve “Peak Performance”?: the capacity to exhaustively utilize necessary experience combined with perseverance, courage, concentration, enormous drive and absolute integrity. TALENT ALONE IS NOT ENOUGH!
Everyone needs a little helping hand (or two) in the successful achievement of a worthwhile goal. VV

action, ageing, awareness, basics of training, beauty, better choices, body, Body shape, change, choices, Energy, fundamentals, game of life, mind-muscle connection, responsibility, safe training, Strength training, strengths, time, training, truth, waist, workouts, you, your life

What do Sit-ups and Sex have in common?

Complementing Phil’s weight-training session with a bit of light boxing in his body re-engineering program.
Student achieving success in one of my programs: Retired former Australian Wallaby & Waratah Captain – Phil Waugh.
Champion Results from a Champion Attitude with a Champion Program.

Well, what do you think?

Sweat … heat … smell ?

Before I tell you what they have in common after over 23 years performing them and helping hundreds of people perform it better, let me share with you a story of a member of a gym I used to own for seven years. Let’s call him Bruce.

Bruce had been a loyal member for close to 30 years. He was an intimidating but a very likeable, straight-to-the-point, anti-status quo, intolerant to ‘bs’ sort-of-a-guy.

My kind of guy – I liked him.

Now, I love observing behaviour and it didn’t take me long to see the repetitive nature and predictability of his workouts, which he religiously performed three times a week. He always did his abdominal sit-ups at the end of his workout and I noticed he did his two favourite exercises. They were:

Roman-chair sit-ups (incline crunches off an incline bench)
Crunches (off the floor)

One day, he was in the middle of his workout when he got a phone call. I then learned that he had a new girlfriend and he thought she was quite special. It was early in his relationship but he was already being pressured in to rushing his workouts.

She wanted him to spend less time in the gym. She thought that 3 times per week for 45 minutes at a time was too much time. He told me that she was always interrupting his workout when he was doing his abdominals.

I asked him how many repetitions he did for his abdominals, and I learned that he did about 400. I asked him how long he took and he said it could be anything between 10 and 15 minutes. It was a third of his workout time!

Too much if you asked me.

I thought it was quite excessive for the goals he was trying to achieve. I asked him to perform a number of repetitions. He was doing them but was not focusing on the technique. A lot of technique goes in to training every muscle group and the abdominal region is no different.

I asked him if he would like to learn an alternative approach. An approach that would reduce the number of repetitions to 30 which would mean he would spend less time in the gym, his new girlfriend would not be so irritated and he would spend more time with her.

He was hungry to learn my alternative approach.

Well, I told him that I did not ‘work’ my abdominals directly and don’t do anywhere near the number of repetitions he did but I had a ‘6-pack’ and he didn’t.

30 reps done properly. That’s all you need to do in the gym

If I was preparing for a body-building contest, I would maybe work them directly at least once per week in the last month leading up to the contest. Otherwise, they (the abs) get are indirectly worked every time I lift weights. It is the most worked muscle group in my body because of the way I approach every rep of every set of every exercise.

I don’t do anything near the number of repetitions that he was doing. 400 was excessive.

So, I told him to reduce the types of exercises he performed from 2 to 1. Let’s get you to remove the roman chair sit-ups”, I said. Let’s simplify things.

He was a little apprehensive but he accepted the change if it meant spending less time in the gym and because of his desire to spend more time with his new love was exemplary. I admired him for this.

I told him it wasn’t how much you do, it’s how you do it. An important key is the breathing technique during each repetition, something he was not aware of and was not practising.

My goal was to show him how he could do 30 ‘good’ sit-ups and not 400 and ‘feel’ the difference. He performed it as I directed and could not believe the intense feeling he was feeling only after ten repetitions.

He was convinced.

He couldn’t believe that he learned a more efficient, more effective way to work his abdominals after over 30 years of training them a certain way. That is why ‘practise does not make perfect as a person could be practising something all his life but practising it WRONG.

Instead, PERFECT PRACTISE MAKES PERFECT!

Brings me to the one similarity that sit-ups have in common with sex: that it is QUALITY rather than QUANTITY that matters.

Just like Bruce, every person I have ever trained have been made aware of how to ‘work their abs’ with quality in mind. They all have felt the difference and have spent less time doing it and unnecessary repetitions. Less time, better results.

Be YOU. No one else can do better than you at being YOU.
Being the best you can be is probably the single most powerful thing you can do to improve the world.
Just find YOU and then …. improve you.
Sculpturing a better you with weights helps re-shape your physique but also your brain wiring.

A winning formula!

Now, most of you know how to ‘work’ your abs and muscles by now. Here are a few pointers for you when doing sit-ups:

Keep it simple.
Breathing correctly to maximize benefit is essential (breathe out at the point of contraction)
Lay on a flat surface (preferably on the floor) with your legs up and ankles crossed, with your hands behind your head.
Breathe out as you lift your head towards your knees
Go as far as you can, keeping your tummy tight (focusing on your exhale on the upward phase and inhaling as you return to the starting position).
Repeat 30 times.

It is very important that you don’t pull on your head as you come up, and you should keep your shoulders and back relaxed. Your hands are meant to be behind your head for support only.

An Efficient, Effective and Safer way towards a flatter, tighter, stronger mid-section. What more do you need!

Go ahead and make this change. See the difference.

One crunch – one rep at a time with quality, not quantity in mind. And remember, practise does not make perfect. Perfect practise makes perfect.

Just like sex.

Enjoy!

Until next time,

Cheers and Ahoy!!

The old Captain Viking Pirate … & his thoughts and words on similarity between working your abs and sex.

Each rep of every set of every exercise is an opportunity for a person to connect with the muscle group he or she intends to.
The right mix of tempo, control, continuous tension and feel is critical.
Executed properly, under an experienced eye, allows one to bridge the muscles with the mind.
Practise does not make perfect. PERFECT PRACTISE MAKES PERFECT!

Working out in my gym during a photo shoot. You can see that I carry my ‘6 pack’ with me wherever I go. So, I don’t need to drink alcohol … I’m always drunk ha ha ha !

My claim: – The world’s BEST Energy & VITALITY Coaching Conversationalist –

Changing lives. Empowering people. One life at a time.

Triple A to Life: Awareness. Action. Adaptation.

Category Archives: Energy

Balance Sheets should balance.

The beauty of truth.

Mr Vulnerable.

Why the idea of spending “quality time” is a misguided maxim.

When to unleash your “HULK”.

Do you scratch when you get an itch?

Sleeping – there’s just no escaping it.

The STAR WARS within.

Do you believe in miracles?

What do Sit-ups and Sex have in common?