It can be difficult to say “no”.

I know I found it quite difficult in my first twenty years of my life. Saying “No” can be the most challenging thing some people may face in their lives on a daily basis.

What I have learned in the second twenty years of my life is that you simply cannot make everyone happy. Trying to do so will only make you unhappy.

Someone wise once said “you have to be courageous to say no to the good to be able to say yes to the best”.

What do you think?

Wise words I think especially during the month of December where there are a lot of demands on peoples’ times and presence. You get many Christmas party invites at this time of year – work Christmas parties, friends’ Christmas functions and so forth. There can be an even greater demand on your time during this month over and above your already ‘busy’ schedule.

It can be difficult to say no at the best of times for a lot of people but during the festive season, it could be even harder. But I feel this could be an opportunity to learn to summon up the courage to say ‘no’.

Time management is not the only thing of importance, energy-management is, too and is pivotal to your sanity in this period. You don’t want to have a situation where you over-extend yourself, your limited energy and suffer from a ‘burn-out’.

It is difficult, I know to say no but you need to do it to save yourself from being overwhelmed with people that clutter up your life and drain you of energy. You need to spend your time with people and activities that add value and energy to you.

If you’re lucky, you may also have some ‘quiet time’ for you, time where you can ‘quiet the mind’.

Here’s what you do:

1. Adopt the philosophy that every invite, every function, every request is ‘good’(nothing is bad).
2. Identify the ones that you believe would give you the most personal growth (the best).
3. Select the ‘best’. For you, for your family.
4. Be at ‘your best’ at the best of these functions.
5. Be in the ‘present’.
As your philosophy is one of gratitude and all requests of your time is ‘good’, saying ‘no’ is a little easier. You’re not saying ‘no’ because something is ‘bad’. Everything is ‘good’ so you don’t have to feel bad that you’re saying no.

Obviously, you will disappoint some people but if they are mature adults they should understand. But time should heal their disappointment.

What you’re left with is time and energy to be at your best and give your best to the people and functions that are the best. If you are a parent, it also means that you are also at your best for the most important people in your lives to you – your spouse/partner and your children.

Merry Christmas to you and a joyous Christmas Day celebration to you, your family and loved ones.

Until next time,