adaptation, awareness, Beliefs, change management, choices, communication, courage, decisions, desire, game of life, gratitude, habits, hope, Imagination, long-term strategy, love, no

Sometimes, local is BEST.

You learn from children and then learn from us.
It is a two-way learning experience, not one way (parents to children like some people think)

My children love going on holidays. They love being on holidays during school holidays.

They have just experienced Christmas and New Year’s celebrations and are still on holidays.

My wife and I decided a while back that we will try and experience more of Sydney, more of NSW, more of Australia before we embark on our discovery of all the other ‘foreign places to visit before you die’.

We just love ‘holidaying local’.

I recently asked my wife her view of the benefits of holidaying local and we agreed on quite a few points and the top 3 were:

We experience less stress
We would like to be made more aware and make our children more aware of the beauty and variety of local destinations and the excellent service they keep.
We get to enjoy all the comforts that we would like to enjoy at a fraction of the cost

Don’t get me wrong, overseas travel is wonderful too. The lure of a different culture and people and food. All fantastic. However, there is so much of Australia I have not seen and have not experienced yet and one of my ambitions is to learn more of the country and its people that I have adopted.

So much to absorb. So little time.

The thing about overseas holidays that really get to me is that even up to the point of getting through the gates and on to the plane, we all seem to be rushing around. Trying to be busy. Sometimes it certainly seems that you have to speed up to slow down, which is, funnily enough the ultimate goal of being on a holiday.

We’re looking to ‘soft our minds’.

When you’re holidaying local, you don’t seem to have that problem. You firstly just tell everyone you know that you’re on holidays and treat it strictly like that or don’t tell anyone at all. You don’t take calls and you don’t return calls. You pretend that you’re holidaying overseas. Difficult to do? No, it isn’t. I simply do this by doing exactly what my two children do when they play ‘pretend games’ of princes and princesses and so forth. They don’t come out of their character roles when they play it and so my wife and I try not to either.

We ‘pretend’ we’re on holidays overseas and enjoy all the trappings but with less cost.

Holidaying local allows us to do more of what we love to do when we are on holiday and that is to ‘be on holiday’. Not spending your time travelling and in transit and increasing your stress levels for no real benefit. Nope, I like ‘softening my mind’ when I am holidaying and unlike overseas planned holidays, I like a little bit more certainty.

Like ordering at McDonalds (once in a while for most of us I hope), the certainty of knowing what I am going to get is reassuring to me. I don’t particularly like surprises. I don’t think most people do either.

I try to, however, not to over exaggerate holidays and all the great time my family experiences together during them. Instead, I remind my children that holidaying is something that we do some of the time. When you look at it as a percentage of our total time spent throughout the year, it is very small. So, when we look at it in this frame, we know exactly where to emphasise our existence – and that is in the beauty and chaos of our simple, daily lives.

I’ve always believed that one aspect of a fruitful life is to see opportunities to make the ordinary – extraordinary. Not overseas. Not in your dreams. No, simply in your everyday life. Try to make the everyday a ‘wow’ experience – for you and your loved ones.

You don’t have to look very far. Just look local. Discover more of the beauty and variety of excellent services that are on offer in your local city or neighbouring city. I’m sure you will find something new if you took the effort to look.

That is the thing though – this approach will take some effort, effort on your part to make the ordinary – extraordinary.

Whenever my family eats, one of us says our prayers not only to bless the food but to also to give thanks for all my family’s blessings. ON top of this we ask for God’s guidance and strength to help and guide our family and friends here and abroad. I try to instil in my children, an attitude of gratitude – daily at a young age.

Giving thanks to God, multiple times daily, reminds us to be in the present but more importantly reminds us not to take anything for granted. It reminds us of how lucky we are. It forces my kids to be in the ‘present’.

I also strongly believe that giving gratitude regularly to your GOD and saying THANK YOU for your blessings is like a bridge from where you are now to the life of your dreams.

My children are getting better at praying now. I tell them to think and deliberately ‘feel’ the words of gratitude that we say in our prayers as saying THANK YOU is a ‘feeling’.

Sometimes, just sometimes, it can be better to stay home and enjoy the family home and environment that you inhabit, something that some of us who live very busy lives don’t really get to do. Sometimes, the best thing you can do is to take some time out to ‘soft the mind’.

This is one of the keys to finding your own definition of success in your life as I believe the better you get at ‘softening the mind’ the better you attract success in to your life.

Remember: your mind is the most powerful success tool you have. Give it rest to get it to perform at its best.

All the very best to you and your family,

Until next time,

Keeping it simple is key

I AM.
Me .. & my constant companion – Mr Fuzzy/Fussy Cuddles

awareness, Beliefs, courage, Energy, game of life, mind

Saying “yes” to the BEST.

It can be difficult to say “no”.

I know I found it quite difficult in my first twenty years of my life. Saying “No” can be the most challenging thing some people may face in their lives on a daily basis.

What I have learned in the second twenty years of my life is that you simply cannot make everyone happy. Trying to do so will only make you unhappy.

Someone wise once said “you have to be courageous to say no to the good to be able to say yes to the best”.

What do you think?

Wise words I think especially during the month of December where there are a lot of demands on peoples’ times and presence. You get many Christmas party invites at this time of year – work Christmas parties, friends’ Christmas functions and so forth. There can be an even greater demand on your time during this month over and above your already ‘busy’ schedule.

It can be difficult to say no at the best of times for a lot of people but during the festive season, it could be even harder. But I feel this could be an opportunity to learn to summon up the courage to say ‘no’.

Time management is not the only thing of importance, energy-management is, too and is pivotal to your sanity in this period. You don’t want to have a situation where you over-extend yourself, your limited energy and suffer from a ‘burn-out’.

It is difficult, I know to say no but you need to do it to save yourself from being overwhelmed with people that clutter up your life and drain you of energy. You need to spend your time with people and activities that add value and energy to you.

If you’re lucky, you may also have some ‘quiet time’ for you, time where you can ‘quiet the mind’.

Here’s what you do:

1. Adopt the philosophy that every invite, every function, every request is ‘good’(nothing is bad).
2. Identify the ones that you believe would give you the most personal growth (the best).
3. Select the ‘best’. For you, for your family.
4. Be at ‘your best’ at the best of these functions.
5. Be in the ‘present’.
As your philosophy is one of gratitude and all requests of your time is ‘good’, saying ‘no’ is a little easier. You’re not saying ‘no’ because something is ‘bad’. Everything is ‘good’ so you don’t have to feel bad that you’re saying no.

Obviously, you will disappoint some people but if they are mature adults they should understand. But time should heal their disappointment.

What you’re left with is time and energy to be at your best and give your best to the people and functions that are the best. If you are a parent, it also means that you are also at your best for the most important people in your lives to you – your spouse/partner and your children.

Merry Christmas to you and a joyous Christmas Day celebration to you, your family and loved ones.

Until next time,

adaptation, ageing, awareness, Beliefs, body, courage, Energy, game of life, hope, life, long-term perspective, perspective, time

In THAT better place.

I lost my biological mother just over four years ago.

I buried her.

It would have been her birthday only two days ago if she was still alive. Made me want to share a little part of that chapter in my life in this blog with you.

Cancer came and took her within four months. It was very aggressive. There wasn’t much more the doctors could have done given the circumstances.

I’m sure if you have lost a loved one, there are times when you miss them and this is one such moment for me. We had an interesting relationship her and I, one much more akin to a brother-sister relationship.

I had never called her ‘mum’ all my life. I called her by her first name. A beautiful name it was – Margaret.

Like most if not all cancer sufferers, she suffered a great deal in the months leading up to her death and all I wanted God to do was to end the suffering she was going through. I spent a bit of time beside her in her last days and asked her quite a few questions about her, about life and about the life she was heading to – in THAT better place.

I asked her if she was afraid of dying and she said ‘no’. She fell back on her spiritual philosophy and believed that all ‘was meant to be’. She was prepared for this life after death where she will be in THAT better place, perhaps with Jesus by her side.

If you’ve ever lost a close loved one, it is a difficult time. It was difficult time for me to say the least but nothing compared to the difficulty she was facing. Her life was coming to an end sooner than she anticipated.

She had a lot of support from extended family who could be with her and the religious denomination she belonged to. They were lovely. God bless them.

You’re never prepared to bury anyone. Anyone, let alone your mother.

The one thing that comforted me was the belief – no, the hope – bright hope for tomorrow – her tomorrow, for her future when she will be sitting beside Jesus in THAT better place. I had the belief that his death and his blood on the cross gave me – gave all of us hope that all things are made new and death is no more, nor grief nor crying. No more suffering and pain.

In my mind, she may have lived a relatively short life on this earth but in my life, she made that one unselfish decision all those years ago to give birth to me. To give me life.

The same for you too – a priceless gift from your mum: life!

I was not at my mum’s side when she died. I was overseas. On the day she died, an aunty of mine who was by her side sent a message to my wife who contacted me to call my mother. She wanted to speak to me.

When my aunty put my mum on the phone, for what seemed like a long while all I could hear was her breathing. Very deep painful breathing. But she could not speak. She was in pain and I could feel her pain through the phone.

She didn’t say anything and yet I felt she said so much. This was the first time in my life that I listened to someone who didn’t say anything and yet seemed to fill my ears up with so much. I couldn’t hold back my tears, they just kept streaming out of my eyes. I was a mess. Fortunately, there was no one in the gym at that moment to witness me balling my eyes out.

There was something very different about this phone call, I could sense there was. I called her ‘mum’ for the first time and I thanked her for giving me life when she chose to have the baby – me, all those years ago. That unselfish decision was the catalyst to allowing me to live the life I live today and to help as many people as I can every day. To save lives.

She never met my son Zachary but I believe she is with him in spirit and she is still alive in them through the genes. She is my childrens’ guardian angel.

In that last phone call I called her ‘mum’ for the first time and told her that I loved her.

I said “mum, I love you. Don’t worry, I will see you again … one day I will join you …. In THAT better place … Just wait a little longer”.

She just wanted to hear my voice one last time and that was the last time I heard hers too.

I was told she died only a few minutes after she put the phone down.

Her spirit is at home with Jesus now.

So, I hope that in her life after death, there is a glorious, endless future for her of which her adventure has only just begun.

I’m sure her happiness and joy has wiped away any recollection of pain and suffering in her time on earth and death.

So, If your mum is still alive, cherish it.

Go right now and give her the biggest hug and kiss and tell her you love her. If she is overseas, make that call NOW – call her up and tell her how much she means to you and that you love her very, very much even if it is in another time zone and you’re waking her up.

Tell her it cannot wait for the morning.

As for me, well I speak to my mum in my daily prayers but I would just like to end this blog by saying …

“Mum, I love you.”

Until next time,

action, adaptation, ageing, awareness, Beliefs, courage, faith, game of life, habits, hope, life, long-term perspective, you

An attitude of gratitude.

Some wise person once said:

“Its not your aptitude, but your attitude that determines your altitude in life.”

Pretty wise words, don’t you think? You probably don’t need to look very far – look at the immediate people in your circle of life to see examples of this aphorism.

Maybe even you.

Being grateful for all that we have is a way of thinking.

You probably have your own way of giving appreciation to whoever you speak to. Whichever way it is, the essence of it is communication and routine. Ideally, giving thanks should be done daily and not only when you’re in real trouble or at a special occasion, like a funeral for example.

It can be done at any time convenient for you.

Me – I try and say a prayer of thanks every time I eat a meal. That is a minimum of six times a day. You pray for the meal to be blessed, thank the good Lord (or whatever higher force you believe in) for your blessings and ask for continued blessings for you, your family and friends and the world at large.

My wife and I have always prayed together, before consuming our meals and we also try to say a prayer before sleeping at night. Our kids have come along and they also join us in prayer. They take turns in leading the prayers now that they are both older.

It’s a family habit. Part of our daily routines.

But I believe there is more to gratitude. It not only reminds us of not taking anything for granted. It humbles us. It puts a certain level of perspective on life.

It is essentially the choice of attitude of the person and their attitude to life. There is magic in being grateful. There is magic in having a thankful spirit.

This magic, I believe, is POWER.

Yes, power!

How is that, you may ask?

Well, I believe a thankful spirit has the power to overcome anger with love; it has the power to subordinate fear with courage; it replaces sadness with happiness and has the power to feel not jealousy but genuine joy at another’s success.

Having a thankful spirit and an attitude of gratitude has the power to inspire productivity and innovation over lack of creativity. Being grateful releases guilt with an heart of forgiveness.

An attitude of gratitude has the power to allow one to grow with an abundance of love
and self-sharing over greed and hatred.

It is a form of power, not as you know it but power none-the-less. An intangible one at times.

So, there you have it, some reasons why I believe that an attitude of gratitude is power.

Knowing that it is a form of power is not power. No, ‘knowing’ is potential power. Applying an attitude of gratitude on a daily basis, now that is power. The power rests in the choosing.

Check your attitude and work on your attitude of gratitude if you think you need to. You may just surprise yourself with how much more you get out of life, by giving more in to it, through choosing your best attitude, always.

Feel, really feel, that intangible power.

Start with a ‘reverse bucket list’ to put some structure to it. Some people do.

What is it? Well, a reverse bucket list is simply a list of things you have done, places you’ve visited and opportunities you have experienced in your life to date. How is this an exercise of gratitude you may be thinking?

You see, when you write it down and then look over what you have written, you can reminisce and be grateful for what you have achieved and done in your life so far. You may even shock and surprise yourself with what you have achieved.

Keep adding to that list as the seconds of life tick by …reminding yourself how lucky you are to be breathing and living life.

When I take my first breath upon waking every morning, I say a quick prayer of thanks to my God, thanking him for being alive. That is the best gift, I believe, anyone alive has been granted.

My whole focus from that moment on is to see how it is that I can be of service to and help people get what they want out of life to the best of my ability.

Also, remember, its not just about adding years to your life, its also important to add life in to those years.

Ask yourself how are you going to best achieve that?

Hint: reflect and give thanks.

Until next time,

Balance & symmetry brings you closer to harmony … to beauty …closer to infinity. Just like mathematics does

adaptation, Beliefs, courage, dreams, Energy, faith, Goals, hope, Imagination, life, long-term perspective, mind, perseverance, respect, time, you

Why Not?

Relaxed.

I love my children.

I love spending as much time as I can with each of them – Olivia and Zachary. I am very fortunate that in this phase of my life I am able to do just that.

Give them my time – my life. Just like other dads do, too.

Olivia, Zachary and I love doing many activities together. Building things using leggos is one such activity. My son teams up with me and we construct, bust down, re-build and re-construct the best castles we can dream up with the limited pieces of leggo pieces we have. Olivia is a champion builder now. Better than me already. They both are. She’s so good, that her constructions are very elaborate and above all – ‘stable’. That’s her thing – it has to be stable.

“Dad, she says, a castle is better to be stable than just pretty, aye dad?”

“Uhumm … yep, to some extent, that is true. You don’t want strong winds to blow it away now, do we? Like most important things in life, we need strong foundations. We all need to have our rocks in life.”

I try my best to encourage them to use their imagination and play ‘pretend’ games. Even though there is a limit to how many leggos they have, each time we build, they create something new. No creation is ever the same.

And when run out of leggo pieces, my daughter asks what else. I say lets pretend even more. Olivia gets so excited and so does Zachary. I start it off by saying ..

“Just pretend … that your castle has wings …. Large wings and it can fly …. Fly up in the sky and the wings are so large that the castle can take us all in it .. and …

My daughter interrupts me and then asks “But dad, castles can’t have wings, can they?”

I thought about what she said and I wanted to tell her the truth but I thought that a little un-truth, a little lie would be the best thing for her and her brother right now. I wanted them to continue their ‘make-belief’ world. Heck, if I had one wish I would want their ‘pretend world’ to not come to an end.

Let them run wild and far with their imagination. Keep dreaming. See what they come up with. Encourage them to ‘see’ what others cannot, what I can’t.

With no restraints. No rules. Their world where anything is possible. Where castles have wings … large wings. Enough to carry mum and dad and them away in to the skies. Forever.

I told her that her castle can have wings. Anything she wanted would be given to her. Any power she wanted. Anything she imagined, no matter how ridiculous it may be, would be granted. There were no rules. No one to tell her what could and could not be done. She was the boss. The creator.

Olivia stopped me again and said: “but dad, castles can’t have wings?”

I told her “why not, Olivia. Why can’t Castle’s have wings? I told her not to just ask “Why?” but also consider “Why not?” and then her story-telling of her make-belief world started flying. She imagined all sorts of things. All sorts of possibilities. I was in heaven just listening. Listening to their debates. Their possibilities.

Wow, I enjoy the storytelling my kids share with me!

She didn’t argue with my lie. Only I knew, that I lied. A lie that castles had wings.

But that lie was enough for her to continue her dreaming, her storytelling. Her ‘pretend-world’. I thought telling her a little lie was better than telling her the truth. She will eventually find out the truth but in her time. In her time.

They can find out other little small lies society tells them as they journey through their lives. But, in their time. Things like Santa Clause. Like the Tooth Fairy. Like the Easter Bunny.

These little lies (and there are many in life) are important to every child. Every person who was once a child. It encourages their imagination to run wild. It gets them to question possibilities. It gets them to not just ask “why?” but instead to also ask “why not?”.

Why not? Why not create a castle with wings? Why not travel to the moon? Why not be a better you? Why not make a more fuel-efficient car? Why not choose to eat a healthier meal option just because you respect and love yourself a little bit more today than you did yesterday? Why not go to sleep early tonight and say no to a ‘big night out”? Why not strive to be a better person from this hour forth? Why not make time to go to the gym at least twice a week? Why not take care of your beautiful self better?

Why not, not why?

Look back at your life. The way I see it, it seems that up until six years old, we get lots of encouragement. But by the time we reach our teens, we get discouragement from everyone and everything we experience in life. By the time most of us kids get to working life, young adults appear to have been drained of courage and have lost most of their enthusiasm – that sparkle that allows a person to choose to adopt positive thinking everyday.

Why?

I believe one of the reasons is that not enough of us humans are asking ourselves “why not?”. A lot of people have lost belief in striving for a better life. A better self. They have lost belief in themselves. Enthusiasm and courage has been sucked out of them.

Also, partly because they’ve stopped asking themselves “why not?”

Its not too late people. Its not too late to do something about it. Its not too late to try to lose ten or so kilos. Why not? Its never too late to start dreaming again. Its never too late to start believing in yourself again. Why not try harder? Why not keep going? I’ve seen it with the very old and the young alike. That is the only thing that gives you hope:

Believing in a dream … make it your dream … to believe in the question of telling you and asking yourself the question of “why not” …. Be your BEST you can be – for yourself and … while you’re on a roll, why not be the BEST YOU CAN BE for others too!”.

Don’t wait for the perfect moment when all is safe and assured. It may never arrive. Mountains will not be climbed. Walking on the moon may never have happened. Don’t allow fear to make you quit. Never quit on life. You’ve got to win over yourself. Never settle for defeat. Never stop striving to being the best you can be, in every sense of the word.

Have you hitched your wagon to a star? Why not?

It seems that there is a philosophical movement that exists that associates drive and initiative solely with materialistic power and gain. There appears to be an ever-growing obsession focused on the accumulation of non-essential personal possessions.

This should not be confused, I think, with personal achievement and the pursuit of individual excellence. Disregarding all material gain, I believe there is a pure personal pleasure which comes from achieving the difficult or the unusual. Whatever it is that it is.

The magic rests in everyone of us. Yes, it rests in you too. The enduring power that has moved you and will move you, again, comes from inside. Yes, inside you.

Success is not just reserved for the talented. It is not in the high I.Q. Not in the gifted birth. Not in the best equipment and technology. Not even in ability.

Success in anything, I believe is hugely dependent upon drive, focus and persistence. The extra energy required to make an extra effort – to go the ‘extra mile’ – to try another approach – to ask ‘why not” do something a little bit different, a little bit smarter – to concentrate on the desired outcome – is, I believe, the secret to achievement. To win, in your unique journey through life.

The magic is this: ATTITUDE.

A wise man once said: “Its your attitude, not your aptitude that determines your altitude in life”.

Apply. Adapt accordingly.

See how the next four decades pan out for you. Choose well.

And when you start dreaming again, you might as well dream BIG. It takes the same amount of focus!

As another wise person once said: “Make no little plans: they have no magic to stir your blood to action – instead make big plans, aim high in work and hope.”

Ask yourself – “Why not?”

Until next time,

Beliefs, courage, faith, life, respect, truths, you

Building-blocks of Character.

Front double biceps pose.

Building-blocks of muscles: adequate protein.

How do we develop character?

Have you asked yourself that question? Are you a man or woman of character? How did you get that way?

Well, it’s a question I have thought about since being quite sick this past week. As I see it, most of a person’s character is built or developed in their childhood years. It’s the result of values and principles learned from parents or from family members and other influential people early in life. This got me thinking about the importance of my role as a dad, for all parents out there and the importance of their roles.

Got me thinking about our kids. About the importance of our roles and those who coach kids and the impact it can have on their character building. The role a parent or parent-substitute plays in a child’s life is probably the most important role that person will ever play in their short lives. A big call, I know.

We build or develop character by over-coming obstacles and going through adversity. Through suffering. We all have in our own ways, to get us this far in life. Congratulations!

In many fields, mentors and coaches all talk about losing or having a losing year as being “character building” season. Some coaches get a chance to prove this mantra in the following year. Some, however, get the chop before realising the winning spirit. Very sad indeed.

Learning to accept a loss or losses and failure and using that to strengthen resolve is what its all about.

In the bible, I think it was the apostle Paul that states something to the effect that “ …. Suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope”. How true this is.

However, when all is said and done, most of our character is established in our childhood years. Adversity and challenges can help add building blocks to it. Coaches can help mold it. But, I believe in our adult years, the only thing that can radically change a person’s basic character is a relationship with a higher force.

A God.

In Christianity, in my faith, it is a relationship with Jesus Christ. In other faiths, there are other relationships. Re-connect with yours.

Its never too late to character build and re-build. Get your hands dirty with the raw materials. Don’t be afraid of a little suffering. Find your master. Build a relationship with this devine being.

Become a master-builder and build your blocks of character (values and principles), with this higher-force’s help.

Re-build: YOU.

Until next time,

a better life, adaptation, attitude, awareness, beauty, belief, Beliefs, better choices, body, choices, compassion, courage, Energy, examined life, game of life, grace, gratitude, hope, Imagination, life, long-term perspective, long-term strategy, love, muscles, perseverance, responsibility, risk, self, self discipline, self improvement, self-respect, success, Vitality, workout, you, your life

Work your giving muscles.

Give.

Giving is a joy.

For the same reason that we should exercise our bodies, we should GIVE. Your body is functioning at its best when it is forced to work, specifically, when your muscles are forced to work. If you don’t do anything and live a sedentary lifestyle, then in the long term you are actually hurting them and yourself.

It is as simple as that.

The thing about muscle training is that you have to ‘expend some energy’. Some people just don’t want to do that, because it means ‘work’. Work equates to pain which equates to fear of it. That’s certainly a very common way of thinking of lifting weights in the gym, but that’s only one perspective.

Another perspective is that ‘working out’ your muscles, when done properly is one of the greatest and most vital pleasures you can possibly experience in your life.

Your lifetime.

In whatever goal you desire, you need to make sure you understand how to use the tools 🛠 necessary to bring about the change you seek.

Energy Crisis WITHIN.

We are constantly reminded that there is an ‘energy crisis’ in the world today. True, there is. The science says this and politicians argue over interpretation of facts about it. Different perspectives again, on a global scale.

However, the biggest threat to man-kind today is evolving within. I refer to the growing energy crisis WITHIN. Within each individual.

There is a direct correlation between what I call an ‘energy crisis’ within and the increase in sedentary lifestyle choices. If you don’t ‘spend’ any energy in the gym and work your muscles, strangely enough, the result is you will progressively have less strength and energy and VITALITY, than if you had.

This individual energy-crisis physically manifests itself in many life-threatening illnesses – both mentally and physically.

First test. Test YOU, always.

Re-charge.

The gym and weight-training is, I believe, one of the last remaining genuine “re-charge points” available for each and every one of us. Yes, available to you, too. Just like your mobile phone and other modern-day comfort and convenient goods need re-charging and energy to function optimally, you do, too.

The more energy and vitality you re-charge and ‘feel’ within you after expending energy working your muscles is akin to what you will get and feel when you GIVE and don’t expect anything in return.

Do you GIVE it just TAKE?

Are you a Giver or taker.

There are givers and there are takers in this world, but I would like to think there are more givers. Are you a giver or a taker?

Do you exercise your ‘giving muscles’?

“Giving muscles?” I hear you say. “What is that?”

Lets firstly look at what it means to be a “giver”?

We can certainly look up a definition if we google it but I will attempt to explain it by referring to some behavioural traits we observe in people around us, and you.

Well, there are many traits – you could say, giving people offer friendship easily; they are caring and empathetic – not only with their money but emotions and knowledge; they take genuine delight in the good fortune of others.

Education through a perception of the truth.
Increasing your awareness, taking sufficient and appropriate actions and adapting accordingly is key towards self-improvement.
Funny thing is that the process also applies to relationships and response.
Vv

Giving is an Attitude toward Life.

Just like making exercise a part of your life, giving is an attitude toward life than it is a specific act at one time or another. Givers have certain openness about them. Givers don’t seem to speak a lot about their ‘rights’. Givers do what is right. They generally find time to laugh and don’t wallow in self-pity. They are forward-thinkers but learn from the past and are keen observers of the present.

Givers do not run constant cost-benefit analyses to see if an opportunity for generosity is to their advantage. They are likely to not get too attached to the material possessions in their lives.

Help people strengthen their resolve, internally, with their own souls
so… that nothing can tear it out. I give knowledge to those who want to learn.

Want Less, Give More.

There are giving muscles in you, in every one of us. We just need to consciously use it and ‘feel’ the life-giving effects of using it. Feeling its essence. It is, in essence, what it means to be human.

Like training your muscles – for 20, 30, 45 or 60 minutes in the gym, you get back ten times the energy and vitality you expended which re-charges you and your being. Your life. You can’t afford not to invest energy. Give more and ultimately, get more. Add more life in to your years and not just be concerned with getting more years to your life.

Giving is to your benefit – physically, mentally and spiritually.

You don’t have to be a saint or martyr to give. Miserliness in all forms, diminishes you – diminishes us.

Diminishes the human race.

The more you keep, the less you have and the less you are.

Giving is a joy.

Want less. Give more.

Try it if it isn’t already a part of your attitude to life.

This is another of life’s interesting paradoxes.

Until next time,

Writing things down sometimes helps in the communication process.
The goal is not communication. The goal is EFFECTIVE communication.
Making real changes with the knowledge gained from ‘feedback loops’ allows me to formulate the right adaptive strategy for student – ex Australian Wallaby Captain, Phil Waugh.
Vv.

a better life, attitude, awareness, basics of training, better choices, body, choices, courage, decisions, ego, Energy, game of life, Leader, life, long-term perspective, mind-muscle connection, muscle building, muscles, patience, perspective, risk, safe training, self discipline, strengths, success, you, your life

Leave your ego at the door.

Slay your ego!

Principle of muscle building

The title of this blog could be applied to many areas of life but in this case, it relates to working out in the gym.

A very important principle of muscle building and I have followed it since I learned of it in my late teens, slowly accumulated my hours in the gym.

There are many variables to building muscles and many principles to training. Leaving your ego at the door would have to be one of the most important philosophies because aside from allowing me to get the most out of each workout and get maximum gains in muscle building, it would also be a significant reason why I have stayed injury-free for over two decades of training with weights in the gym.

Well, I tell all the youth that I see training with less than ideal technique in the gym, “to get muscle gains you need to leave your ego at the door”.

Drop the weight down and use something you can handle safely. What I mean by this is that if its muscle-maximization you’re after, then, lose the thought that if you lift very heavy weights, you will automatically get bigger muscles. True but not true. Firstly, accept that you’re not a weight-lifter or power-lifter. How strong you are does not build the biggest muscles.

Maintain control & feel when you’re containing the Lion within you. Leave the ego at the door.

Control and feel

Strength does correlate to muscle-size but only to a point. So, to build muscles one must try to focus on control and feel for any exercise one is doing. You need to keep it simple and have continuous tension on the muscle group throughout the range of motion with good form.

If you load up the weight and sacrifice good form, you’re unlikely to build muscle but instead increase your risk of injury. This could then keep you from the gym which then may get you down and de-motivated. You take one step forward, four steps back in your quest to build muscle and transform your physique.

End result: mediocre muscle development. Not what you desired.

Its not how much you lift that matters but how you lift. Ask yourself the question “how well am I doing this exercise?” each time you perform it. Keep it simple. Focus on the feel of the exercise and maintain control throughout the execution of the exercise. It is highly likely that you are using a weight that is too heavy for you if you lose control and feel while performing a ‘set’ of your exercise and not completing the required number of repetitions at a specific tempo. Instead of building muscle, you’re only working your ego.

Find the courage to keep going.
Right.
The courage rests in you.
Take Lead, be the Leader that YOU are.

Say No to “No Pain, No Gain “ Maxim

Now if that is your intention then fine but if you’re serious about getting good results, stay away from the old, hard-core maxim: No pain, no gain! Seems to only apply when you’re using excessive weights. Instead keep my maxim below in mind: “Work the muscle, not the joint!”

Working out in the gym is a great way to transform your physique from the person you see in the mirror now to the person you imagine yourself to be. To do so, keep your ego in check, leave your ego at the door and instead be patient and make incremental steps towards your ultimate strength and body re-engineering goals.

Learn proper technique. Practise it religiously. Be patient with your progress. Become a better master of your instrument ‘your body’, just like a musician would with practise.

Eat nutritionally-balanced meals aligned with your goals and give your body adequate rest and recovery time to adapt and develop.

Train well. Eat well. Rest well.

Repeat.

Until next time, best of vitality to you.

yours in iron, mind & muscles 💪,

Paul e 💝alentine

It is a great feeling to do this … but make sure it isn’t your ego that is leading. I made 2 World Championships partly because others said I couldn’t. A great feeling to prove people wrong.
If it is Stubbornness & not ego leading … well that’s ok.

Me & Mr Fuzzy/Fussy cuddles at my favourite beach 🏖 here in beautiful Sydney, Australia 🇦🇺

a better life, ageing, awareness, beauty, better choices, body, choices, courage, Energy, game of life, habit, habits, life, long-term strategy, muscles, perspective, risk, Strength training, truths, Vitality, you

Some truths on exercise, ageing and losing fat!

Education through a perception of the truth. To be the best in a particular field, you need to seek help from the best. Champions help create champions. Vv

Education through a perception of the truth.
To be the best in a particular field, you need to seek help from the best.
Champions help create & develop the champion in you. [Photo: Former Australia Wallabies Captain & current CEO of Australia Rugby, Phil Waugh transporting himself to his Best Self in his tailor-made Peak Performance program

Regardless of your age, or how out of condition you think you are at the present time, it is never too late to start an exercise program. You just have to change your philosophy on your life, with a more caring attitude to YOU.

The older you are, the more important it is that you exercise. All the science research points to this. It is a no-brainer. What older people cannot afford to lose is the little muscle they still have that assists them in their daily lives and mobility. Its simple, like most things in life: “use it or lose it, but don’t abuse it!”, which applies to all ages.

Some studies show that there’s a typical loss of about 1% of muscle mass or lean body mass (LBM) per year from about age 50. There is a slight increase after 60 and by age 70, there may be up to a loss of 25% relative to what it was at age 25, depending on the individual and if there’s been no strength-training in their lives. What a scary thought, isn’t it!

Loss of muscle LBM has many negative impact on peoples’ lives: strength declines, reduced metabolic rates, postural problems, reduced fitness, increased tendency to lug around unwanted bodfat, weakened resistance to injury and illness and deterioration in physical appearance. Another big consequence in old age is a significant reduction in mobility, partly due to weakened skeletal muscles. And that’s only a few likely negative consequences.

I have been doing strength training for over 23 years now and have helped hundreds of people of all ages with their body re-engineering goals, with over 80% success rate. I believe strength training is one of the most important things you can do for your appearance and health. Strength training is critical for building muscle, maintaining muscle or more importantly, minimizing muscle deterioration and atrophy.

Results with care.
Here, Brad is ‘feeling the essence’ of the exercise and inching closer to his best self.
Vv

Muscle is like precious gems – you need to build it and then preserve it. It is the fountain of youth, your magic youth potion.

Stronger muscles produce health benefits that adds to your life. It builds your sense of vitality. Building muscle contributes to reducing the impact of ageing. Strength training helps you stay young for your years. However, strength training is not enough. One needs to combine it with regular structured stretching, consistent cardiovascular work, healthy nutrition, adequate rest and recuperation and a healthy lifestyle.

All this helps you off-set the on-set of ageing.

I have seen them, so perhaps have you. People with that glow. People that are filled with that life-force, that all-important sense of vitality. People who seemed to have gotten closer to the fountain of youth. Most, if not all of them, have consistently and persistently worked on their strength training.

They’ve simply decided to build muscle. No more thinking, no further analysing. They just DID IT. They took action. Think about it – you’re made up of more muscle than anything else. I mean you’re covered with skeleton muscles (that help you move and do what you do every single day), your heart’s a muscle and your stomach’s a muscle too. What do muscles do? Keep it simple … they need to work. It makes sense to ‘work’ your muscles then, doesn’t it?

Muscles are one of the very things that keeps us all alive. But hey, if slowing down the ageing process by building muscle is not convincing enough for you what about if I say that it could help you lose fat. Yep, that’s right, do you want to lose unwanted fat? Well, build muscle. Period!

There are so many organizations and people in the world today that give out fat-loss diet plans that don’t include strength training. This is not ideal. It robs the body of the little muscle it has, making fat loss even more difficult because of reduction of one’s metabolic rate.

This is so common today in many weight-loss programs all around the world, where individuals think that some new ‘fad diet’ will be the answer or some magic supplement. It does not work that way. “That way” is not sustainable and is a huge reason for many victims of the ‘yo-yo’ diet symptoms and millions of dis-illusioned and disappointed individuals with the best of intentions.

Executing an exercise for maximum benefit and minimal risk takes a lot of practise,
Just like genuine friendship, genuine muscle requires a lot of work and time.
Remember: practise does not make perfect. Perfect practise makes perfect.

Its body shape, not body weight that really matters.

Building muscle is the only way you can improve your body-shape and this is achieved through progressively increasing your muscle-fat ratio.

Have a go today, if you haven’t done so already – start a structured strength training program for the most important person in the world to you – YOU. That way, the people that depend on you – your spouse, your kids, your employer, your clients – they get the BEST YOU too. It could be one of the most important decisions you will ever make in your life. More important than the dream house you intend to buy one day. Build that dream house in you, first.

We’re all reminded that people are living longer now. What’s more important I believe is adding LIFE (vitality) in to your years, not just adding years to your life. Most aged people spend the last 20 years with various levels of discomfort and immobility.

Remember though: when you exercise, try to do it as efficiently and effectively as possible, under the safety umbrella. And, don’t try to do everything yourself if it isn’t your area of expertise, you can sometime do more harm than good to yourself.

Let go of all self-imposed limitations and fears and ask for help. It takes a lot of courage to seek help from an appropriately skilled professional with the relevant experience and credentials.

There are a lot of excellent exercise professionals out there, those who give you the results you desire – with care.

Best of luck!

Until next time …

In the heat of competition.
Pose name: Abdominal/Thighs.
Place in contest: 1st.

← Back

Thank you for your response. ✨

a better life, attitude, authenticness, Beliefs, better choices, change, courage, ego, Energy, examined life, game of life, gratitude, happiness, life, long-term perspective, love, perseverance, responsibility, self love, spiritual balance sheet, spirituality, success, time, truths, you, your life

Is the grass green on the other side?

Greener grass anyone?

Change your philosophy, change your life.
Vv.

Envy

How much do you earn?

Is it enough for you? Do you wonder if your friends, neighbours or family are earning more than you? Do you secretly covet what your neighbours’ drive; what house they live in? I wonder …. Is the grass greener on the óther side?”

How do they do it? What do they do to make so much money and wealth? How can you learn their secrets, you wonder. Should you change jobs or see if the grass is greener on the other side. What word could sum up this way of thinking, I wondered. I think a good word would be: Envy.

Some argue that envy is the root of all evil.

Some argue that envy is what spurs on economic growth. Well and good in a capitalist society. My question is how much growth is enough? I must admit that I, along with many others have been charmed by “overnight success Rags-to-riches stories” and the wealth of the very rich. You’re bombarded with examples on social media, on-line and in magazines and papers.

The simple things in life are often the best

The outward display of success seem so appealing that it’s pretty easy to fall for those less-than-subtle advertising ploys touting fancy foreign engineering (like cars) or architectural wonders of some luxury house.

Gee, even in church we sometimes focus on the trappings – lavish sanctuary, fine pipe organs, plush carpeting and so forth.

It seems the advertising industry is the machine that uses this belief as its fuel: Envy. Most in the western world have been have been prisoners in the tyranny of consumer culture. Programmed with advertising, movies, video games, magazines, tv and MTV from the cradle. They say by the time a child in our western world reaches the age of 21, he or she would have watched and/or listened to a million ads.

Now, that is a lot of noise and clutter for the brain, and you wonder why the fastest growing disease is mental disease.

It is certainly great for business, because more growth is better for everyone, for the sake of capitalism.

De-clutter your brain of all that noise built up from early childhood clouding your thoughts.
Delete and stop contributing to the bottom-line of ‘bullshit’
Work on managing your funnel better. Don’t be part of the horribly growing stat

Try Harder = more success?

The theory is that if people are unhappy which has resulted because people were envious or jealous, people generally tend to TRY HARDER. Does it work that way with you? Or do you pull others down rather than raise your standards and climb up to theirs? Do you just wrap yourself in self-righteous misery when you cannot complain anymore about the unfairness of life?

If you are a believer in Christ and very wealthy, remember not to leave God our of your life. It is said that – without understanding, you are like the beasts that perish. Your power, influence and wealth won’t carry weight now but will not matter one zilch, in eternity.

I know you know this already.

A neuron example & its network of dentrites

Nature of Wealth

Do you read the annual publications of Rich Lists? Where do you stand? What do your friends make? Do they make more than you? How does it make you feel? Does it make you happy or miserable? I dare say that it must make more people unhappy than happy. The thing is, it shouldn’t be. You see, there is a finite nature to wealth ….

Do you wonder those “what if “ scenarios like the price you may have got in on a certain share/stock or what if you had sold your car or business at a better price by waiting a little longer or if you had not left that job? I’m sure you have thought about certain things in your life this way too. We all have. Does this make your life better or worse?

In this life the wealthy often inspire awe, admiration and praise. Be happy for them, don’t envy. This adulation will be short-lived. The possessions that are the basis of their pride and self-aggrandizement will not serve past ‘six-feet under (the grave)”.

Allow your mind to ”connect’ with infinite intelligence.
With consciousness.
It is like nothing you’ve ever experienced before.

Contentment (genuine) brings you closer to the elusive Happiness

Maybe we should resolve not to begrudge others their success or good luck in life. Maybe we should resolve to be happy for them. To genuinely wish them well with it.

Maybe we should see that the grass is not always greener on the other side of the fence. No, not always. Maybe we should not yearn for the grass on the other side.

Maybe.

Maybe it would be easier to sail your ship through the sea of life by looking ‘straight ahead’ instead of looking over your shoulder at the other ships (other people).

Maybe, just maybe you will find contentment and move a little closer to everyone’s elusive ‘happiness’ goal, if you stopped coveting the wealth and treasures of the very wealthy. I believe – being content, genuinely content, is one of the surest ways of moving close to happiness. It is a process by which you also move to another consciousness level. Ask yourself how content (genuinely content) are you with everything in your life?

Be content with where you are and what you have achieved to get this far.
Appreciate what I refer to as your ‘reverse bucket list’ and have an attitude of gratitude.
This is a key ingredient to moving towards genuine happiness

Change your colour, change your life

I know one thing for sure: being less envious and accepting that ‘the grass is not always greener on the other side’ would make your life less depressing.

No, I am going to take it further and suggest that maybe, we should trying viewing the colour of grass not as green or greener but viewing it as another colour (another view/philosophy).

Change your colour (philosophy). Find the right colour. Change your life – for the better.

For me, the colour is a combination – black with a touch of red.

What’s your new colour?

Then ….

Ask God to teach you to help you find and guide you with your perspective on life … to learn to live always, not for this life only, but with “ëternity’s values in view.”

One way to know YOU is to understand God.
God is in you.
God is you.

I’ll hopefully, see and chat to you in heaven when our time in this third dimension is done and dusted!

Until next time.

Cheers and a big ahoy to you on your journey through the maize of life!

The old Cap’n Viking Pirate … & thoughts on envy, contentment and happiness in life.

Appreciate beauty. Find your truth. Create your beauty if you can. Usually, beauty and truth does not involve wealth, growth, mass and material possessions.
It is counter-intuitive, but to find your beauty, your truth … LESS IS MORE.

Eliminate and de-clutter the ‘noise’ that has been uploaded in to your brain since the cradle

Changing lives. Empowering people. One life at a time.

Triple A to Life: Awareness. Action. Adaptation.

Category Archives: courage

Sometimes, local is BEST.

Saying “yes” to the BEST.

In THAT better place.

An attitude of gratitude.

Why Not?

Building-blocks of Character.

Leave your ego at the door.

Some truths on exercise, ageing and losing fat!

Thank you for your response. ✨

Is the grass green on the other side?