action, ageing, awareness, Beliefs, Energy, Fitness, game of life, habits, life, long-term perspective, needs, planning, time, Vitality, workout, you

Your CALL OF DUTY: Stand and deliver.

Here is Chris, approaching 50 and looking and feeling better than a young man in his 20s. Here, Chris is demonstrating a "side-chest" pose (with a smile). ** Photos taken by Robert Walsh Photography. Visit "www.robertwalsh.com.au" - Brillian Artist. Skilled Professional. Wonderful Person. Cheers Rob! Vv.

Here is Chris, approaching 50 and looking and feeling better than a young man in his 20s.
Here, Chris is demonstrating a “side-chest” pose (with a smile).

Stand Tall … & deliver … to your end

We have been told over the last five to ten years that there is an ‘obesity epidemic’ and it is somewhat influenced by the increase in consumption of fats in our diet.

This is a goldmine for food manufacturers. All sorts of products were forced on to the market that had ‘no fat’ or ‘low fat’ or ‘99% fat free” on the packaging. Wow, said the consumer who enjoyed the same taste but with almost no fat. How good was that?! Eat all you can and not put on any fat!

A great sales gimmick that fed in to the pockets of many manufacturers and companies that control and own and sold these supposedly ‘healthier products’. What a load of – you know what! Your body needs fat, your brain will not function without adequate levels of fat. Everyone that I have ever helped over the years know that ‘fat burns fat’. Period!

So, if you’re going to have fat, go for full cream or full fat. Your body metabolises it better and appreciates the genuine article, not some imitation. Enjoy your milk, ice-cream and other densely-packed fat products in full. You will enjoy it more and you will likely eat less. Your internal organs would be greatful and would add to your longevity.

People ask – “why?” … I /My curiosity continually askS “why not?”
Seek possibilities… always

You see, over the last 23 years in the gym (my lab), I have seen and helped a lot of people who suffered from back pain. One lady suffered from chronic back pain for 17 and half years before she met and started training with me. Read about her story in an earlier blog titled No belief, no nothing”.

I helped her help, herself.

I helped create more awareness in her being, in her mind. I helped her help herself to believe again. To believe in the most important person in the world to her – HERSELF. That is the power of BELIEF, my friends.

NO BELIEF, NO NOTHING. Remember this!

You cannot give a ‘band-aid’ treatment to a problem such as this. That only treats the symptom, not the cause. Unfortunately, a lot of today’s current medical focus is on short-term fixes (seeing only the 10% of the ice-berg we see above the water level. What is needed is a more sustainable solution that addresses the cause – the 90% of the ice-berg that sits under the water line and that we don’t ‘see’.). A preventative approach.

Or better still, there’s always the current paradigm and practise – a drug remedy for all and every ailment you might experience. Thank God for the pharmaceutical industry, aye.

Here’s a little trivial information for you – did you know that Pharmaceutical companies spend over $100 billion on marketing their products, with a quarter of this – roughly $27 billion going to doctors in the form of gifts, meals and samples. Makes you wonder about the perception of independence and conflict of interest in the recommendation and dispensing of drugs.

Do you know what the main cause of back pain is? Well, I have been saying this for many years and I have deduced a very strong contributing factor.

It is simple: we are sitting more! There is an inactivity epidemic and an increased volume of sitting is a very high percentage of what constitutes this inactivity epidemic.

Take a stand … a stand of what you believe… IN… and know you have support of the angels

Back pain can be caused by many things but an increasing number of office workers are suffering from chronic back pain. Back pain, I believe, can be caused by too much sitting and no physical activity. Look around you, we are sitting almost all the time. We’re constantly sitting in our cars, sitting and watching computer and television screens. Sitting, sitting and more sitting!

Do you suffer from back pain?

What is the opportunity cost? You struggle to find time to use your bodies, the way it’s meant to be used. This appears to be the plight of the average Australian (based on the largest and most comprehensive health survey in Australia in 2011 – 2012 by the Australian Health Survey) and probably indicative of most countries in the developed world.

On average, Australians are spending between 45 and 55 hours per week SITTING – for work and travel and lounging around in leisure time. The study also shows that an average of 40 hours is spent on all other activities (which includes time for exercising).

Now, I think the medical industry recommend that you should move your body in a moderately intense fashion for about 30 minutes each day, which adds up to at least 150 minutes per week. Do you do that? Be honest now. I think Doctors refer to this as ‘sufficiently active for health” and associated lowers risks like: cardiovascular diseases, various forms of cancer, depression and other ailments.

Now, a common reason I have heard for not exercising or not going to the gym is “I just don’t have the time, Paul”. I’ve never bought that.

Here’s why I have never believed this excuse: the survey actually indicated that roughly 60% of adults did less than the recommended 30 minutes per day and of this, less than 20% actually engaged in daily exercise for an hour or more. Very small indeed!

So, can you see why I have never believed the excuse of not having enough time to exercise? It isn’t an issue of inadequate time because the study showed that at least 3 hours per day is committed to sedentary leisure like – socializing (in person and on-line), using the phone or the internet and watching television. It would be interesting how this percentages would change since the introduction of new technology and service providers like Netflix and Stan. More choices for consumers. More entertainment at our finger-tips. More chance of not exercising. There’s going to be an even greater epidemic of gigantic proportions – MORE SITTING!

Follow your truth… find your beauty … be The Light 💡… share & illuminate the world 🌎 from darkness

It’s not helping society. It’s harming society, the social fabric of it. It’s harming every single one of us – no one is immune to it. It’s harming our children. It’s harming every adult or it will eventually.

All this inactivity strongly exacerbated by the arrival of new technology will supposedly ‘raise our standard of living’ but it will slowly suck the vitality out of every person. It will suck the very essence of what life is all about. This is the real opportunity cost to society. The study showed that children 2-4 years of age are spending almost two hours per day sitting in front of the television or computer ipad/tablet.

A frightening statistic was that overall, physical activity decreased and screen-based activity increased as age increased. This trend is at a very high risk of rising and rising fast!

Now, the solution is simple: to fight this epidemic, each and every one of us can do our part to reduce this alarming statistic. Reduce the risk of our nation becoming a nation of ‘seat warmers’. Keep it simple: DO YOUR PART.

And how do you do that?

Well, play your part. Play your part for no one else, but YOU. Stand up and deliver. Stand up and start moving.

Start moving and may be everyone can unite in the moving and possibly create a ‘movement’ to MOVE. An ‘anti-sitting’ movement!

We’ve just had ANZAC public holiday commemorating the ANZACS 100 years. What a significant chapter in Australia’s history. I think we should all take a page (maybe a paragraph) out of the ANZAC book.

They, who gave their lives, their freedom for freedom, for the life you and I live today. They stood up and fought for their future – where we are now. That was their CALL OF DUTY.

If you’re not an Australian, that’s ok, I’m certain you only have to look back in your country’s history to identify a point or points where your forefathers went to war and sacrificed their lives to give you the way of life you live today.

Maybe, just maybe, each and every one of us need to treat this inactivity, all this alarmingly increasing instances of sitting as a serious threat to our life and that of the future lives of the citizens of our country. Maybe, each and every one of us need to imagine how the ANZACS believed in our freedom and rose to the occasion. Maybe, standing up from your sitting position and moving with intent could be seen as your contribution to yourself and your health but more importantly for the health of our nation.

Maybe, this is how we all need to ‘take a stand’ against this very important health crisis – one of increasing levels of sitting. We need to take a stand against this by literally, standing. Standing and moving to stand and deliver.

the key rests within you… in  your belief system. Question them… turn them upside down, inside out… to embrace change better. Change that is happening to you.

Yeah, let’s all work towards a healthier YOU, a healthier society, a healthier nation, a healthier world, just by becoming part of the “Anti-sitting movement’. The health costs and damage caused to individuals and countries productivities by excessive sitting, I believe is far greater than any terrorist threat our world has faced or is facing.

The real terrorist rests within us – within our excessive sitting. It is killing the minds and bodies of man-kind slowly but surely. Incrementally killing you from within – a slow, invisible self-torture and most don’t realise the high risks associated with this, until it is too late. The real threat to each and every one of us is not an external threat from the caves in the deserts of some foreign country, no, the real threat is our personal habits, one of which is sitting.

The real threat to you is lifestyle habits, a big one of which is excessive sitting. I believe it is now an epidemic!

So, don’t sit back any more than you have to and before you sit down to view more and more television/tablet/ipad screens, think again. Stand up and give moving a go, you only need 30 minutes per day. It will do you a world of good and you may just like it enough to develop a new habit. A habit that will help fight this current epidemic of inactivity and excessive sitting.

Make it your personal CALL OF DUTY each time you stand up and step out of your home for that 30 minutes of exercise. Imagine that each time you strap up your sneakers for your activity, you’re getting in touch with the hero within you.

Now, this is a cause worth believing in. Worth fighting for, don’t you think? This will not only give you freedom of movement in your old age but more importantly lay the foundation for the ‘movement to move’ for our kids and their kids.

“Monkey see, monkey do” as the saying goes.

Let your children see what you do. Let your children learn from you (as they already do). Let them see their hero (you) walk the talk. Let them see what you are doing for you and your country. You don’t need to carry a gun and ammunition for this. You don’t need to blow up things. NO!

You just need to stand up and start moving.

Me & a member of my Family Gym. He strives to be his best every day and seeks to help those who need his help, to help them, help themselves.
“Together we stand, divided we fall”
Stand tall and deliver – Men!!

So, don’t sit down any more than you have to as your life and your children’s lives depend on this. Now, that is the ANZAC spirit in action. Make this your CALL OF DUTY – just stand and deliver.

Live it!

One step at a time. Keep moving. Let’s fight this sitting craze. Let’s fight for activity. For movement. You join and get your family and friends to join this new movement called: “the movement to move, movement”.

Individually, you’re strong but together, with everyone doing their little part , united for a common worthwhile cause – this ‘movement to move’ could have the power to make our dreams of a better life – BETTER for us and for our future generations.

It might seem like a small matter today but I believe this scary trend has the potential to cause more deaths and social costs than the deaths caused by malaria, propagated by the tiny mosquito. We need to take care of the little things because these little things grow to become big things.

A wise man told me once that Elephants don’t bite, mosquitoes do”. Very true indeed. A child dies from malaria every 30 seconds in Africa, caused by the little mosquito. Very sad indeed.

Remember to always take care of the little things in the important areas in your life. Little things have a habit of adding up to big things. Keep taking those little steps forward.

Become part of this movement TODAY.

Good on ya, ANZAC!

All the best in your decisions today for a better tomorrow.

Until next time,

 

Standard
adaptation, awareness, body, Body shape, body weight

Bulking up vs building up.

Using my framework to help individuals of all ages, shapes and sizes to help themselves become THE BEST they IMAGINE THEMSELVES TO BE. Photo: an A+ pupil Phil Waugh - retired Legend of Rugby, Ex-Australian Wallaby & Waratah Captain. Knowing is potential power. Doing is Real Power. Knowing the right time to apply both is essential to goal achievement.

Using my framework to help individuals of all ages, shapes and sizes to help themselves become THE BEST they IMAGINE THEMSELVES TO BE.
Photo: an A+ pupil Phil Waugh – retired Legend of Rugby, Ex-Australian Wallaby & Waratah Captain.
Knowing is potential power. Doing is Real Power. Knowing the right time to apply both is essential to goal achievement.

I have heard many, many reasons of wanting to lift weights from people in the gym over the last 23 years. Many myths are still being propagated too.

There is one such myth that still exists regarding the approach to take to building muscle and that is – “bulking up”.

A lot of men think that “bulking up’ equates to putting on muscle. They think it is the best or only way of building up their muscles. They think that just because they have put on 5kg in a month means that they have built 5kg of muscles.

I have news for you: It does not work that way!

I see it all the time, young men (and dare I say women, too) believing the myth that if they go through a ‘bulking up’ phase, they would see extra muscles when they trimmed down.

In my 23 years of weight training I have put on close to 15kg of lean body mass – not weight, muscle! That’s just over half kilo of lean muscle per year. Not much when you view it this way aye?

Yeah, but taking the ‘tortoise approach’ to building muscle is not the key message. Building up is important, yes, holding on to the hard-earned muscle is more important. Remember this: build it up, then do everything in your power to hang on to those precious muscles.

You see, in all these years, I have not gone out and purposely aimed to ‘bulk up’. I have always seen myself as a work-in-progress and have always been (and still am) in the ‘building up’ stage even after all these years. There are just different phases of ‘building up’.

Muscle does not convert in to fat and fat does not convert in to muscle. Period!

You should not try to gain weight just for the sake of it in an effort to look bigger or ‘bulk up’. Building quality lean body mass (muscle) takes time and patience and relies heavily on genetic pre-dispositions.

With the goal of bulking up, it would highly likely be that a high percentage of your bulk weight would come from unwanted fat. Yes, you will put on bulk and weight but you will look ‘smooth’ and fat deposits will settle on areas of your body that you may not be happy about.

When you have a mind-set of ‘building up’ your muscle density, you encourage your body to become more metabolically efficient because every hard-earned muscle ounce you build becomes a ‘fat-burning dynamo’! Your engine room or metabolism (the rate at which your body burns energy) gets bigger and bigger. I could liken it to a small car engine (say a 1.8L) compared to an 8.0L or a V8.

Fully focused! A true warrior & champion. Focusing on making every repetition of every set of every exercise as ideal as possible. Practise does not make perfect - Perfect practise makes perfect! Photo: Retired Champion Ex-Australian Wallaby & Waratahs Captain and player in action under my watchful eyes.

Fully focused!
A true warrior & champion.
Focusing on making every repetition of every set of every exercise as ideal as possible.
Practise does not make perfect – Perfect practise makes perfect!
Photo: Retired Champion Ex-Australian Wallaby & Waratahs Captain and player in action under my watchful eyes.

More muscle equals more engine power (even at rest)!

Huge difference in energy consumption and power output. Huge difference in body composition and ultimately body shape. The mirror would reflect this.

You feel better, you look better and you wear your clothes better. You make the clothes ‘look good’!

Working out with the goal of building up a physique is far safer and a smarter way to go about your weight training than simply aiming to bulk up just to trim down later. You don’t have to work hard to lose what you put on in the first place.

So, focus on building up rather than bulking up.

Keep your training continuous and simple. Aim to put on good, quality, lean body mass (muscle). It might take longer but it is better. So what does it take? It takes vision (of a better you), a workable plan and the work ethic (discipline, consistency and persistence) to execute, with patience.

We all know that life is not a dress-rehearsal. Do you live every day like it was your last? Ask yourself: Have you got what it takes?

To build muscle, remember to leave your ego at the door of the gym and remind yourself that it is body-shape, not body-weight that matters.

Compare, say, a 75kg person with 15% body-fat than a 75kg person with 35% body-fat. They both weigh the same, but they will have totally different body-shapes and the latter person would more than likely have higher health risks.

This is why only focusing on your body-weight and not your body-shape (body composition) does not give you the full picture. Always aim to increase your muscle : fat ratio.

So, aim for building up rather than bulking up and help yourself manage one of your physical health and life risks.

Build up that engine room. Build up that ‘revving power’!

Then ….

Drive safely through the roads you decide to take as you journey through your life.

All the best!

Until next time,

Side triceps pose. Contest: Australian Natural Bodybuilding Titles. Placing: 2nd.

Side triceps pose.
Contest: Australian Natural Bodybuilding Titles.
Placing: 2nd.

With another woman, backstage.
A fan.

All B&W photos by: Robert Walsh of Robert Walsh Photography. Visit: “www.robertwalsh.com.au” and see how this great artist may be able to help you. Vv.

Standard
accountability, action, adaptation, asking questions, awareness, Beliefs, better choices, body, boys, change, children, choices, courage, game of life, gym, life, long-term perspective, long-term strategy, love, muscle building, muscles, parenthood, perspective, planning, safe training, son, truth, truths, workout, workouts, your life

Is it safe for children to weight-train?

Working the guns.

Playing with weights is as safe for children as it is for adults. Like all things, boundaries and limits are to be applied.

I have been asked many questions relating to health and fitness and weight training over the last 23 years in the gym.

If I knew the answer to the question of when it is safe for children to weight train, I would be lying. However, after all that time and my love of deducing conclusions from simply observations of consistent trends around me, I would like to attempt to provide a solution.

I will use my powers of reasoning I have developed in my 40 years on this earth, so far.

Here we go ….

My son Zachary, doing weights even before he could all properly

Leading Legends

I am truly inspired by older generations who have maintained resistance training for most of their lives. Almost all of them look and feel like someone 10, 15 even 20 years younger.

Leading Legends” – that’s what I call them. They are great examples of making it part of lifestyle.

Some of them used to tell me about how perceptions have changed over the last 50 years in regards to exercise in general and in particular – the many myths relating to weight training.

There were and still are many myths relating to weight training. There was a time when people were saying that weight training wasn’t good for women. Before that athletes like rugby players were told to stay away from weight training as it would ‘slow’ them down – this wasn’t too long ago – even in the 70s.

And even further back, it was even questioned whether weight training was in fact good for anyone at all. Times change and myths get busted. Myths are just that – myths and are meant to be dis-proven.

It is only in more recent times that the general public has accepted that weight-training is of enormous benefit to women too. I am so happy about the increase in women attending gyms as I have seen this landscape change quite a bit over the last two decades.

Now, my question is if weight training is now believed to be of enormous benefit for men and women, why shouldn’t it be good for children? After all isn’t exercise good for everyone?

My son Zachary would crawl around my Family Gym that I owned & managed for 7 years. He used to remove the pins from the machines to the dismay of the members

To weight train – you do one thing 

The truth or my version of ‘the truth’ in my straight-forward answer is that weight training can benefit any individual – young or old – who is healthy enough to engage in the activity. But that is just my opinion.

I have helped hundreds of people of all ages – kids under ten (including my children) all the way to people in their 90s. Human physiology is the same no matter what age. To weight train – you do one thing: work the muscles. To do this, you literally extend and contract that particular muscle under tension/force provided by the weight.

Simple. Right?

The very old and the very young and everyone in-between can do that. It’s what muscles are meant to do: to ‘work’ for you.

There are still myths relating to children training even in today’s world. The biggest fear amongst parents appear to be the possible negative effects on the development of children prior to puberty – that lifting stunts the growth of children.

If this was the case, the famous Arnold Schwarzenegger would should not have grown to 6’2” as he started lifting weights well before he hit puberty. I am not a Doctor but I believe this irrational fear is unfounded medically.

My daughter on the leg extension machine in my a family gym

How are risk assessments done?
My question is if weight-training was a height depressant, why is it that considerable growth can sometimes take place in the ‘post-puberty’ years. And if this was a medical fact, then, everyone should only start weight-training when their full height potential has been reached. For some, this would be well in to their early twenties.

The issue as I see it relates to the formation and growth of bones. I can understand the parents’ worries, including my family Doctor’s. From what I understand about what I have read about bones, the process of bone formation and growth is hopelessly complex and wonderfully simple at the same time.

If I recall correctly, Tiger Woods picked up and was training in golf from the age of 2 and was coached by his dad. Leytton Hewitt began playing tennis around the age of 3. Some top swimmers were undergoing stringent 4am early-morning training programs from a very young age, where parents were driving them to and from swimming pools. I know because I had good friends that were doing that when we were in Primary School.

Not many made the Olympics.

Is this any different to subjecting a child to some gym training under supervision in a gym? How is it that the perception of risk of a child in the gym is greater than that of a child on a soccer field, swimming pool, golf course or rugby field? What about a child playing tennis or netball? How are these risk assessments done?

I believe the risks to a child and his or her growing bones and muscles is higher with the other sporting activities compared to the risks associated with supervised structured weight-training.

With some of the members of my Family gym
Playing around with some ‘light weights’ … that children can also play with

A better athlete gets better results.

In my opinion the risk to bones, joints and muscle development and overall health risk (injuries from knocks to the brain and head in Rugby or other contact sports) is greater to the young kids playing most sporting activity outside the gym, compared to structured activity in the gym. My assessment of risks of these contact sports is VERY HIGH to EXTREME, because of the repetitive knocks to the head and recurring concussions.

I believe proper muscular development assisted by a well-structured weight-training program, complements whatever sporting activity a child/person chooses.

It simply makes them a better athlete. A better athlete gets better results.

The risks to the joints of the other sporting activities – like golf, tennis, netball, swimming, running etc is HIGH. The wear and tear to the joints is very high.

The joints are over used, and there is accelerated wear and tear and it shortens the effective useful life of your body. Just like any other machine of value you possess – say a car, for example. Depreciation rates can vary depending on how you use and service your machines.

Most individuals then suffer from premature ageing (from over-use) of joints and really suffer uncomfortable daily living later on in life. However, the risks to the child’s self-esteem; sense of self-worth and interest need to also be monitored too. Participants can be severely negatively affected because of the constant expectations of tolerance levels.

Weight-training done safely and under appropriate supervision is a safer and more beneficial to a child’s whole-self development then any other physical activity there is. Weight-training complements and helps make a child better at whichever sport they choose to participate in.

It is only now that tightening of regulations are being implemented to address not only some current risks but also long-term risks sustained by athletes.

My children are as comfortable with a set of light dumbells, not dissimilar to young budding soccer players or tennis juniors with footballs and rackets in camp and sporting academies. In this controlled soccer environments, no one appears to question the deliberate practises these children are forced to undertake in non-weight-bearing activities and how safe it is.

My son and I hanging out in my Family Gym

Just because a big majority of people are sending their kids there does not mean it is the safest or have the lowest risks.

Or how many instances of injuries are sustained by the very young, many of whom are regularly seeing physios and chiros at an age that is unheard of only a few decades ago.

What does this tell us? About the risks these kids are putting themselves under, the full extent will become evident in their later years.

People are only too quick to place gym training as a high risk but this is yet another myth and here is where I believe the problem is:

It is the inability of parents and administrators of sporting activities to initially correctly assess the level of risks. Yes, self-limiting beliefs unfairly bestowed on to children by parents who know no better.

Maybe they just need to adopt a new thinking paradigm that assists in the development of the ability to assess risks of activities and whether or not the risk is acceptable to them.

Time will bust these myths.

Big Truths will always beat Big Lies.

Believe in BETTER.

Make better choices with the life that you have left, with the lives of your children. Time on this planet is all that we really have anyway and one day … that will be taken from all of us.

This is one of those BIG TRUTHS or is this a BIG LIE? Anyone believe this is a MYTH?

All the best.

Until next time,

 

My wife & kids hanging out with me for a few hours in our Family Gym. The gym was my children’s playground.

Learning and absorbing our habits every single day of their initial phase of their lives is what our young Princes do.
Teach them well.

 

Standard
adaptation, awareness, Beliefs, Imagination, life

Why can’t 2 and 2 equal 5?

Side Chest.

Side Chest pose. Building muscle & sculpturing the body Is very mathematically based as you need to have a very good understanding of “balance & symmetry “ to be able to create “flow” in muscles 💪. Anyone can build a big chest or biceps 💪 but does it flow with the shoulders & triceps and with the lower body? 

I love mathematics.

I loved it so much that I majored in it in my first year of my undergraduate studies at university over two decades ago. When I got my first ‘c’ grade, I thought that NASA would not be interested in me and so I quit one of my loves. It was difficult decision back then.

But I knew that it would be with me for the rest of my life and I could call upon it at any point and it has been at my beckon all the way up to now. I use it in my thought processes and decisions every day.

I still think like a mathematician in many daily challenges and the many decisions I have to make. You do too. We all do.

I think mathematics comes from life and I think it explains principles of life. We can learn a lot from mathematics and I know I have. It challenges our powers of reasoning and that is one of the reasons I love it.

I also love the purity of it. Unlike other sciences, mathematics seems to be in a class of its own – neither fully complying with the experimental sciences like Chemistry nor in the creative arts.

It’s a loner. It stands alone.

People live by the rules they set up. Does having more rules in society indicate the decrease of trust?

Learn HOW to learn

Mathematics essentially teaches you to be a problem solver and I think this is very applicable to everyday life – at home, out in the sporting field or at work. It teaches you and excites you to ‘learn how to learn’, again. This is very important because most adults stop learning once they leave the educational system.

Not ideal at all. There is just so much to learn, so much great nutrition for the brain and the enhancement of the mind.

It is easy for anyone to do a puzzle if someone has told you the answer. Yes, but this is simply a test of memory. No, a mathematician is someone who feels he or she is able to solve a problem that neither you, nor anyone else, has studied before.

Now, this my friends, is the beauty of mathematics – where it teaches you the powers of reasoning.

Even if you disliked mathematics in school or still do, mathematics is all around us. Both geometry and arithmetic are closely connected with everyday life – look around at all the buildings – your home, your church, your temple, your roads. It’s everywhere.

Society cannot function as it does without mathematics.

What about arithmetic? It’s everywhere too – we measure everything don’t we? What is your salary? How do you confirm that what you are paid is what was agreed upon? What about paying two $2 coins to a bus driver for a $5 ride? What do you think he will do? Do you think he would accept this? I don’t think he would, would he? I think he would regard the two times two dollar coins equals four dollars and not five dollars, and tell you that you are a dollar short.

Why?

Well, probably because it is well entrenched and established by the experience of everyday life. That bus driver has always known two and two equal four. Nothing else.

My question is why can’t two and two equal five? Why not?

Probably because we can’t imagine two times two equalling five. Why can’t magicians who perform miracles every day in front of an audience turn two plus two in to five? This miracle would impress me more than any other miracle.

But, that is not the point of this blog. The point I am trying to get to is that we simply cannot imagine two plus two equalling five. This is where imagination has its limitations.

Balance & symmetry brings you closer to harmony … to beauty …closer to infinity. Just like mathematics does

The extent lies in awareness 

Why is this? Why can’t we imagine two and two equalling five or any other number but – four? Maybe because in the whole of human history two plus two has always equalled four, nothing more, nothing less. Our mind has not needed to imagine it any other way.

I think the answer lies in the way my children and all the children and all of us have learned, to speak for example. My children learned how to speak by hearing my wife and I call them by their names. They first learned their names and our names and then household objects and so on. They then learned words describing how they felt like “ are you tired?” “Are you tired?” or “she looks happy” or “say you are sorry”.

It is the same way that mathematics has evolved.

Mathematics is so pure that it is just like life. The meaning of love and being wise, for example, we have to learn from everyday life just like children learn how to speak words. We understand better, directly from our own experiences – what we see, what we feel and what we do. The extent lies in awareness.

Mathematics, just like philosophy has roots that lie in the common experiences of daily life. Mathematics evolved from and through life and reasoning is not separate from the other powers of the mind and other parts of life. No, it is intricately connected.

Reasoning has grown from experience. This is a fact of mathematics. This is also a fact of life. This is the only way we learn from life – through direct experience of everyday life. You’ve learned that way, I have too. I see my children learning that day-by-day. Beautiful isn’t it?

If this is the way we learn best, then it follows that we should become better students at it, at life, that is. We should become the best students we can be OF LIFE.

So, back to my question: Why can’t two and two equal five?

 

Have the courage of a Tiger 🐯. Do what is RIGHT, Always. Don’t discount the power of your experiences.

Fly with our minds

It’s very difficult to imagine anything else, isn’t it? Just like if I asked you to imagine a new colour. You would find that you would be combining the effect of colours that you have already seen. A law well known to psychologists is “There is nothing in imagination which was not previously in sense.”

If anyone two hundred years ago had prophesized what the world would be like to-day, he would have surely been considered insane and thrown in to a mental hospital or crucified.

So, when the fact that we are unable to find reason with making two and two equal five demonstrates one of the limitations of imagination – it is outside the experience we have had.

Our experience has not been touched. We do not have wings and have not learned how to ‘fly with our minds’ yet.

Maybe, just maybe, we need to imagine better – without boundaries of schooled thought. We need to lose our inhibitions in imagination like what alcohol does to us when we drink a little too much. Maybe, we have all been using our minds incorrectly, maybe we have not fully utilized our powers of imagination and ‘seeing what we don’t see’. Maybe we will find reasons and possibilities if and when we have expanded our imagination to see clearer pictures and numbers.

Pictures and numbers in our minds that we have never seen before. Generating our power of reasoning through experimental imagination.

Maybe then, two and two could equal five. But, for now we know nothing else and probably should accept it as four as society may classify one as insane.

But, in a hundred years from now …. Anything is possible. Newer colours … two and two equalling five … mental telepathy …. Maybe we will be able to fly after all … that starts off with ‘wings of imagination’.

We’re only limited by our imagination.

Imagine A BETTER YOU. A BETTER WORLD. A BETTER TOMORROW. A BETTER LIFE.

Imagine you being YOUR BEST …. Even if the attainment of it seems ridiculous or impossible when you try to. It is obvious that no one can predict the future, it would not do you any harm by imagining a better one.

Never, ever, ever give up in imagining a better YOU.

Make believe that 2 and 2 equal 5.

Tell no one.

Until next time,

IMGP3144

Build your bridge from where you are to … where you desire to be. A lot of times, it pays to get help from an experienced builder… who “walks the walk” ..& not all “just talk”

Standard
action, awareness, belief systems, Beliefs, body, choices, Energy, game of life, Imagination, life, long-term perspective, mind, muscles, perspective, planning, respect, self-image, truths, workout, you

Top 3 Keys to a successful workout. Key #2: Elegance.

February 2015. At my old school gym, just about to do a set of barbell biceps curls or  what I would sometimes refer to as 'loading the guns with ammunition'.  Hope you're wearing your bullet-proof vests, take cover!

February 2015.
At my old school gym, just about to do a set of barbell biceps curls or
what I would sometimes refer to as ‘loading the guns with ammunition’.
Hope you’re wearing your bullet-proof vests, take cover!

One of the many things I have learned early in life is that the “big truth” will always beat the “big lie”. The truth is we are more than meets the eye – but having a physique sure makes a difference in how people treat and react to us.

What is that saying that we’ve all heard growing up – “Don’t judge a book by its cover”.

Well, it is lovely and idealistic but the truth is we all do. The whole world does, every single day in everything we do. Matter of fact it is how one of the many public games is played on this planet. That is one of the many less than ideal characteristics of most human beings – we all judge things we ‘see’ by how they ‘look’.

That is just how we are wired.

Packaging for products is vital to the successful sales as it directly influences consumer purchasing behaviour and ultimately the ‘bottom-line’. Manufacturers know this and marketers get huge dollars for helping them do this.

Now, another thing I have learned in over 23 years in the fitness industry is that Self-perception or how we see ourselves, greatly determines how we look.

You see, “Inner image creates outer image”. Now, I know there are some idealists that may disagree, and that is fine. On the whole, this statement runs true for all of us. But here is one of the interesting things, one of the encouraging possibilities – it is one’s perception of one’s self that creates greater possibilities.

Drop your past when need be, when it does not serve you any longer. Let go of beliefs and belief systems that does not add any value to your current phase of life. Remove beliefs that limit you, beliefs that do not allow you to reach for your best self.

In my experience, another key element that makes up a successful workout is – elegance. I think this is attained if you’re natural and genuine, searching for an artistic approach (sculpturing as opposed to just lifting weights) and having a great appreciation for “balance and symmetry” (another definition for beauty).

Not many people ever get to this level and truly experience the ‘essence of each and every rep of each exercise’. Just as not all golfers ever play as effortlessly as a Tiger Woods or a professional on a golf course, instead with constant frustration of under-performing handicaps.

Just because you can hit a ball with a club does not necessarily mean that you will hit it in the direction of the hole. This is the same as lifting weights in the gym for the majority of people – you see, anyone can lift weights but only a few ever learn the art of body-building and choosing the right exercise (club) for the right moment (set etc).

Elegance in your workouts or the ‘search for balance and symmetry’ is hard to describe but I find it easy to recognize when I see it. You see it when top sports-persons play for example – Roger Federer gracefully hitting returns on the tennis courts or Jonathan Thurston having all the time in the world to kick in rugby league and effortlessly creating a play out of nothing. Or Maria Sharapova gliding across the courts or Usain Bolt bolting like lightening on the 100m track.

It is sheer beauty, ultimate elegance displayed before your eyes. Very few things can beat the feeling you get from witnessing ‘elegance in action’.

Making elegance part of you or what you do is a reflection of attitude combined with aptitude but taken to the HIGHEST LEVEL with the ambition of being the BEST. To achieve this takes the gifts of Energy and talent harnessed with a magnifying focus towards BEING THE BEST YOU CAN BE.

It requires hours and hours of not just practise – but deliberate practise with sustained FOCUS over many years.

Elegance fascinates me because I believe there is something eternal about it.

So, a successful workout for me is elegant (efficient, effective and a little sophisticated). This is similar to what we call –

  • FREEDOM … in dancing
  • SELF-EXPRESSION … in relationships
  • Being in the ZONE … in sports
  • EXCELLENCE … in work
  • NATURAL … in family
  • Looking HOT … in Sex
  • MAKING A DIFFERENCE … in Society
  • Getting the JOB DONE …. in business

So, there you go. After 23 years of working out in the gym, and my love of reasoning from and making deductions from patterns observed, my 2nd key to achieving a successful workout is simply: Elegance.

Strive for this if you haven’t already done so.

It is more efficient, effective and reduces the risks of injury giving you longevity and more years of enjoyment.

Learn to learn, again.

Strive towards the new man (or woman) that resides in you, with elegance in mind.

All the best in your journey.

 

Until next time,

Side Triceps. Australian Natural Bodybuilding Championships. Lost by 2 points. Final placing: Runner-up.

Side Triceps.
Australian Natural Bodybuilding Championships.
Lost by 2 points.
Final placing: Runner-up.

With my friend and coach at that time - 2 x World Number 1 (natural bodybuilder).

With my friend and coach at that time – 2 x World Number 1 (natural bodybuilder).

Standard
action, adaptation, awareness, change, choices, diet, eating

Brains eat books.

_MG_9765

I love children and I love my kids.

There’s not a day that goes by where they don’t make me aware or more aware of aspects of life. There is no doubt in my mind that having children is a blessing. No doubt at all.

I love telling my kids imaginary stories and get lost in them with them. They have story time every night just before bed, part of their bed-time routine. They have been born in to a home of books like many children all over the world, a rich source of knowledge.

Sometimes, they can get lazy and mis-treat books – theirs, Cathy’s or mine in a less-than desirable manner. For example, they would throw it on the floor or walk over books or leave them strewn all over their bed-room.

I have constantly reminded them of the importance of looking after their books and treating them with respect, likening books to food. I would say things like –

“Kids, please take good care of your books, they are nutrition for your mind – food for your brain”.

Or something along the lines of –

“You wouldn’t eat food off the ground that is dirty, would you? You would get an up-set stomach if you did, just like books for your mind.”

Now, I know my daughter who is two years older than Zachary, fully understands my messages but my son, Zachary has not given me any inclination in the last year that he was getting this message, until last week.

Well, his mother – Cathy, was asked a question by Zachary at the dinner table about a week ago (I was at work) relating to nutrition. This is how it kind of unfolded –

Zachary asked his mum, Cathy how the brain gets its food.

Cathy proceeded to start explaining the process of digestion, that is – when you eat the food is chewed and then makes its way done the oesophagus down to the stomach and then enters the intestines. It passes through the linings in to the blood and then is pumped to the brain and so forth. Both my children just love the processes of the human body explained to them. They never seem to grow tired of this topic at this stage.

Before Cathy could finish her answer, Zachary interrupted and said –

“No, mum!”

“… Brains eat books!”

When Cathy relayed the story to me, I was surprised. But I was also content that my son had not only been listening to my ranting about the importance of books and taking better care of them, he was making conversation regarding this topic.

I was particularly impressed that he had summed up my messages better than I ever did. He used less words. I had never said “brains eat books” but I did say many other statements that meant the same thing.

You would be hard pressed to get much better than “Brains eat books”. I know I never said it that way.

So simple. So true. So beautiful said.

He took everything I said in over a year and filtered it and got to the essence and spat out a 3-word summary. That was just brilliant, I simply love the intelligence behind the thinking.

So, keep feeding your brains … with books. The right books. The right nutrition.

After all, they do say – you are what you eat (for the mind and body).

Eat well.

 

Until next time,

VVc_logo_cropped

Standard
action, awareness, belief systems, choices, Energy, Goals, long-term perspective, long-term strategy, muscles, planning, risk, Strength training, Vitality, workout, you

No Brain, No Gain.

_MG_9779-1

I love a lot of old school training philosophies. Most are simple, to the point and cut out a lot of irrelevant stuff – things some of us refer to as ‘BS’.

While I adopt some of these fundamental training principles in my training I always assess the relevance of anything towards my goals and my needs. For example, assessing the legitimacy and relevance of a saying I have heard over the years:

“No pain, no gain”.

Put simply, I don’t fully agree with this. While I agree in simplicity for most things, I think this statement is too simplistic and too ‘black and white’. There are many ‘grey’ areas that should be considered especially in regards to the “risk-to-benefit’ ratio of exercises chosen.

It’s working out with your ego not in check. I have always believed that if one of your aims is to train in such a way to get the most benefit out of the time invested in your workouts, then you should leave your ego at the door.

Also, I think it is quite a negative slogan and should be replaced by something that is more positive and relevant to today’s every-day-person – like maybe:

No brain, no gain. Don’t train.” for the thinking bodybuilder.

I believe everyone who ventures in to this world and lifts any weight to assist themselves towards a better version of themselves, is by definition, a body-builder (whether you’re a grandmother lifting 1kg weights or a powerlifter squatting 200kg.

Everyone should strive to be a ‘thinking body-builder’.

To truly benefit from this, one should learn the basics of old-school training techniques with selected exercises that give optimal results, with safety in mind.

You must choose the right system of training for your specific goal in order to get the most benefit from your workouts in the shortest time. Ask yourself what is your top 3 goals and then narrow it down to the most important goal. Is it strength? Is it power? Is it a combination of strength and muscular growth?

You see, what I have found in over 23 years in the gym is that most people don’t have a plan, no, most people have what I refer to as a ‘goal’ or objective and their training program is haphazard at best. They try so many things at the same time, while all the while, hoping that they will strike it lucky. It is quite evident that similar patterns of behaviour happens in other areas of life too for some. For example, you see this in the popularity of games of chances – like lotto and gambling machines, despite the extremely low probability of hitting a jackpot, people still participate, losing more and more of their finances.

I have asked many gym enthusiasts over time, questions regarding why they have adopted a new ‘fad’ of training. I might ask them why they work out a certain body part first or do certain exercises before another in their routine, or what their goal is in doing 50+ repetitions on an exercise they either have an illogical answer or no answer at all.

Or, they are just doing it because their friends are doing it. Very sad indeed as they may not have considered the risks they are putting themselves under by following blindly.

Most people go about their training in a manner similar to someone who tries to bake a cake without any recipe laid out for them. They know bits of information, for example they know they need some sugar, some flour, some butter and need to put in in the oven. However, they have no clue about the temperature they need, how long they need to bake it for and other smaller, but important ingredients that go in to a beautiful looking and tasting cake.

Chaos results in the kitchen and frustration and higher risks of injury prevails in the gym. Not smart at all.

The human body and mind is a very sophisticated machine and to re-engineer it without a plan from an informed person is like building a house or an extension to a house without an Architect’s plan. It is fraught with higher risks.

Wasted effort. Wasted time. Very inefficient. Ineffective and unsafe. Not ideal indeed.

What you need, and what most people around the world need is a ‘working plan’. This is what smart training is all about. Increase your awareness of yourself, determine your needs and then seek help.

Here is a check-list of my 9.5 key factors to consider when you are selecting a type of workout or workout schedule:

  1. Your main goal.
  2. An honest assessment of where you are at – key KPIs on your health and fitness status.
  3. The duration of the program (3 months, 6 months, 6 weeks?)
  4. The rigidity of exercise execution (what emphasis is there on strict form).
  5. Rest time between sets.
  6. Total number of sets performed (per exercise; per muscle group and per workout).
  7. The amount of weight to be used (start, during and end of exercise).
  8. The tempo (speed of individual sets – at the start, during and end).

9.5 The number of reps (per set – at the start, during and end).

So, let me say it again, before seeking help from a suitably qualified and experienced professional, make sure you at the very least, think about what your main goal is. The professional could help identify your destination and help you formulate a plan that would give you answers to the above key variables.

And why would you want to do all this?

Well, you would not go and see or get advice from a plumber if you needed help with your tax return now, would you? I would hope your first port of call is an experienced qualified Accountant.

Become a thinking body-builder, no matter what age you are or how experienced you are.

And remember…. No brain, no gain – no train.

All the best!

 

Until next time,

VVc_logo_cropped

Standard
adaptation, awareness, belief systems, body, choices, Energy, Goals, long-term strategy, mind, muscles, perspective, planning, truths, workout

Top 3 Keys to what I think a successful workout is. Key #1: SIMPLICITY.

_MG_9866-1

What my definition of a successful workout is would most likely be very different to yours or anyone else’s. It means a different thing to different people – number of sets done; how much weight you have lifted; how quick you have performed the workout etc.

It’s a personal thing.

To me, a successful workout is when my mind, body, heart and soul becomes ONE. It is when I become one with the weight I am lifting, when the machine or free weight becomes an natural extension of me. It is when I am at one of my most vulnerable points: when I feel I am strongest and yet so weak.

A successful workout to me is a stepping stone to a vision of how you imagine yourself to be. It is a building block you have placed on the bridge that takes you from where you currently are to where you would like to be. Like a chameleon, a successful workout teaches you more about yourself along the road of re-engineering a better you – through constant adaptation.

It is through adaptation that one generates muscle – good, quality, clean muscle. Individual muscle groups that ‘flow’ together like a champion team where no player is bigger than the team. It is about the fusion of art and science; of chaos and order; of a constant cycle of destruction, repair and love.

Many things go in to a workout but if I had to sum it up with my Top Key Variables, after 23 years of slugging it in the gym, my perception of what a perfect workout are:

  • Simplicity (basic)
  • Efficiency and effectiveness ( I call this ‘elegance’)
  • Orderly (chaotic but purposeful – and slightly sophisticated)

I would like to elaborate on one of these key factors in this blog today: SIMPLICITY.

Don’t copy-cat other peoples’ workouts you may glean over from the internet. This limits your capacity to truly be YOU. Developing a strong sense of whom and what you are about nearly always contributes toward making the right choices with exercises in your workouts. Keep it simple as I believe this ensures success, not only in the area of body re-engineering but also in other areas of life.

Simplicity is simply ‘pure and uncomplicated’. It is being authentic to yourself.

It is freedom from distractions and ‘fluff’. This includes not getting caught up on how ‘fancy’ the gym you’re training at is; not being so in awe on the types of equipment your gym has or the exciting new lighting colours; not focusing on how much weight you lifted or how many repetitions you performed.

No, this is not simplicity – this is more clutter! Unnecessary clutter, which you don’t need more of in your life. You need to always remind yourself to make the complex –simple.

Simplicity is when a workout has a basic design – it has ‘old school’ basics perfectly blended together with a modern-twist and exercises that assist with daily life, with safety in mind. It is a perfect fit, like the way a perfect glove fits your hand. Every exercise is chosen and executed with an alignment with your ultimate physical goals – of where you desire to be.

Simplicity is working out with a clarity of purpose and with the best choices of exercise that reinforces that clarity and cutting out all the “Bull@hit”!

So, I strive to achieve a “successful” workout each and every time I enter the gym, being fully aware of the energy levels at any point in time. Simplicity and the other two key elements are in my mind before, during and post work-out. It is this combination which is a perfect blend of orderliness and chaos that brings me closer to a perfect workout.

And it will do the same for you, if you try. Try again if you fail the first time. It might take a little getting used to, but you will get there. Never, ever give up (something I remind my children when they are facing a challenge and want to throw in the towel).

The key thing is to keep things simple. Any fool can get complicated; it takes a genius to be simple – uncluttered. Find that genius in you, if you haven’t already.

Now, I hope you understand a little bit more about what I consider an ideal and ‘successful workout’. It is partly this focus that helps me and further increases awareness in and educate all my current and past pupils. With my unique framework, I am very grateful to be in a position to help people help themselves find their best selves.

Become aware. Apply sufficient and appropriate action. Adapt accordingly.

Train SMART!

Until next time,

VVc_logo_cropped

Standard
action, awareness, body, Body shape, Energy, Goals, habits, long-term strategy, mind, muscles, planning, respect, risk, workout

Take care of your “set of wheels”.

2007 World Natural Bodybuilding Championships staged in NY, USA. Represented: Australia. Placing: 4th. Repeated this in 2008.

2007 World Natural Bodybuilding Championships staged in NY, USA.
Represented: Australia.
Placing: 4th.
Repeated this in 2008.

Now, I know some of you may love your cars and affectionately refer to them in many ways, including a ‘set of wheels’, and I am sure many of you take good care of your set of wheels. Let me tell you a story about the first time I heard that phrase.

One day, early on in my body-building years, during a break from my ‘set’, I gazed out the window and down at the cars parked on the road (the gym was on the 1st floor), when the owner, came up to me and said –

“Son, you’ve got a good set of wheels there.”

I said “umm, no none of those cars there are mine. I jogged to the gym”.

He laughed and said that he wasn’t referring to the cars as he looked down at my legs. He pointed to my legs and said –

“those wheels – you’ve got a good set of wheels!”

I was a little embarrassed about the mis-understanding but I thanked him for the compliment.

Over the last 23 years of training with weights in the gym, I have managed to invest more time in those wheels he was referring to and the other body parts, with the goals of – balance and symmetry in mind. Sculpturing the most proportional physique that my genetic potential would allow. This harmony of the ‘flow-of-muscle’ has helped me represent Australia twice at the World Natural Body-building Championships and placed in the top 4 in consecutive years.

In all this time, I can proudly say that I have managed to stay relatively injury-free and have not seen a physio or chiro in that time for any serious injury. One of the contributing reasons is that how much weight I lift has been close to irrelevant to building my muscles and being considered one of the best natural body-builders in the world. What matters is QUALITY not QUANTITY. I have a ‘safety-first’ approach to training that does not hinder me or my client’s achieving the goals they desire.

I have never allowed the amount of weight I lift to be a critical factor of my progress. What mattered to be me has always been two things:

  1. Control
  2. Feel

If I am not feeling the muscle and am not in control of the weight I am lifting then I am not building muscles in the most effective way. I am not maximizing my muscle growth potential. I always believed that to build good, quality muscle, one has to ‘leave ones’ ego at the door of the gym’.

I have seen it since I started lifting weights all those years ago and I still see it today, sadly, in increasing numbers amongst youth today – people using too much weight.

Aiming to build better wheels by using too much weight for movements like squats is like trying to bench too much, bouncing the bar off your chest and generally with very poor form. Not good at all. Flat Bench pressing with too much weight has been the primary reason that shoulder injuries is the most common injury sustained by men world over.

Not worth it, not good.

Why would you want to do that – overestimate how much weight you can lift or perform countless repetitions of a particular exercise with very bad form and for no particular purpose? Most people unfortunately use a scatter-gun approach to training and hope that what they are doing will get them to their goals.

So, back to my set of wheels analogy story, unless you just happen to have very strong legs and can train with huge poundages easily and copy the mass monsters you see on you-tube, there is just no need to try to squat 600 to 800 pounds.

As with any other body-part, use the appropriate amount of weight for the set/rep scheme you’re using, no more and no less. You need to remind yourself that you’re in the gym to train the muscle, not to impress the people around you with how much weight you can lift.

I have always said you should aim to “work the muscle, not the joint”.

So, it follows that if you’re aiming to build muscle and a more aesthetic, pleasing physique, remember that the actual amount of weight you use is irrelevant. You’re body-building, not power-lifting or weight-lifting or any other modern-day activities that are “off-shoots” of body-building, where measurements and numbers play a pivotal role. Knowing how much weight you can press or how many repetitions you can perform is how millions of weight-training enthusiasts all over the world, injure themselves.

Work on your set of wheels and build them with control and feel, with continuous tension and simplicity. Maximize muscle and minimise risks to knee joints.

Take care of your set of wheels, don’t damage them beyond repair. You don’t want to have to replace your knees and hips too early in your life.

Build your brawn with brain. Remember: You’re in the gym to help yourself, not hurt yourself.

Train hard. Train SMART.

 

Until next time,

Back lats spread a few weeks prior to the Australian Natural Bodybuilding Titles. Placing: 2nd in Australia.

Back lats spread a few weeks prior to the Australian Natural Bodybuilding Titles.
Placing: 2nd in Australia.

A slight variation on the compulsory "Front Double Biceps' bodybuilding pose. With this one ... I'd say you reach for the stars. Contest: 2007 World Natural Bodybuilding Championships held in NY, USA. Ranked: 4th Best Natural Bodybuilder in the World.

A slight variation on the compulsory “Front Double Biceps’ – a signature pose of mine.
Contest: 2007 World Natural Bodybuilding Championships held in NY, USA.
Ranked: 4th Best Natural Bodybuilder in the World.

Standard
awareness, choices, courage, Energy, respect, you

If Only.

 

February 2015. At my old school gym, just about to do a set of barbell biceps curls or  what I would sometimes refer to as 'loading the guns with ammunition'.  Hope you're wearing your bullet-proof vests, take cover!

February 2015.
At my old school gym, just about to do a set of barbell biceps curls or
what I would sometimes refer to as ‘loading the guns with ammunition’.
Hope you’re wearing your bullet-proof vests, take cover!

There is always high emotion when any of us lose a loved one or loved ones. There is an overwhelming sense of sadness and sorrow. All sorts of thoughts run through our minds and one thought I would like to highlight is that of – guilt.

It is inevitable that when we live and love another human-being deeply, we will eventually hurt them in some way, shape or form. We all do and say things we later regret and we know what ‘buttons to push’ to hurt our loved one(s).

There are always ‘ups and downs’ in all relationships and sustaining a relationship you value is a constant building project of loving, hurting and reconciling. I think it is very similar to the process of muscle building – it is a repeated process of destruction, feeding and rest/recovery.

I believe, no one can truly learn to love unless you are willing to accept the risks of hurting and failing and being hurt. When we lose someone in whichever way – death, by choice etc., they all give us reminders. Reminders of those hurts and failings, of words we regret saying, actions we would like to take back and incidences we wish we could erase. Depending on the individual, we all feel a sense of guilt, of varying degrees.

Dealing with guilt can be difficult but there are many resources available today that can assist you. One source I found that has always existed is the bible. Whatever religion you belong to, I am sure you find clarity and fulfilment through its teachings.

I am taking a few minutes out to write this blog on Easter Friday (today). You see, my children’s current perception of Easter is predominantly about – chocolates, eggs, bunnies, fancy hats, hot-cross buns and so forth. It is wonderful and they enjoy the traditional Easter egg hunts. Gee, I get in to it too.

However, I do try to remind them of the real significance of Easter and the crucifixion and resurrection of Jesus Christ, our saviour. They are quite taken aback by the gruesome nature of being nailed to the cross. They have much to learn but all in the right time.

It is during Easter that we should all remember that our Lord and Saviour died and gave his own life for us sinners. This was the ultimate act of forgiveness – sacrificing his only begotten son for us, our salvation. This is what Christians should keep in mind amidst the Easter bunnies and chocolates practises today – Easter Friday.

He then rose to give us new life – freedom!

In this Easter break, reach out to someone you may have hurt in some way, shape or form and try to reconcile, just like God has given us the Lord’s supper to provide us with the strength to reconcile with God.

Don’t let the guilt of ‘if only’ linger in your being, regretting that you should have righted a wrong or forgiven. Release it. Reach out and touch that someone special. Reconcile.

There is a prayer that I remember from my days in my youth as an altar boy and I recall it every now and then when the need arises. I think it is from Psalm somewhere and it goes something along the lines of:

God, create in me a pure heart and renew in me a steadfast spirit.”

It summons up courage to love again, forgive, reconcile.

Have a blessed Easter!

 

Until next time,

Working the guns.

Working the guns.

VVc_logo_cropped

Standard