Author Archives: valentinevitality

a better life, ageing, awareness, beauty, better choices, body, choices, courage, Energy, game of life, habit, habits, life, long-term strategy, muscles, perspective, risk, Strength training, truths, Vitality, you

Some truths on exercise, ageing and losing fat!

Education through a perception of the truth. To be the best in a particular field, you need to seek help from the best. Champions help create champions. Vv

Education through a perception of the truth.
To be the best in a particular field, you need to seek help from the best.
Champions help create & develop the champion in you. [Photo: Former Australia Wallabies Captain & current CEO of Australia Rugby, Phil Waugh transporting himself to his Best Self in his tailor-made Peak Performance program 

Regardless of your age, or how out of condition you think you are at the present time, it is never too late to start an exercise program. You just have to change your philosophy on your life, with a more caring attitude to YOU.

The older you are, the more important it is that you exercise. All the science research points to this. It is a no-brainer. What older people cannot afford to lose is the little muscle they still have that assists them in their daily lives and mobility. Its simple, like most things in life: “use it or lose it, but don’t abuse it!”, which applies to all ages.

Some studies show that there’s a typical loss of about 1% of muscle mass or lean body mass (LBM) per year from about age 50. There is a slight increase after 60 and by age 70, there may be up to a loss of 25% relative to what it was at age 25, depending on the individual and if there’s been no strength-training in their lives. What a scary thought, isn’t it!

Loss of muscle LBM has many negative impact on peoples’ lives: strength declines, reduced metabolic rates, postural problems, reduced fitness, increased tendency to lug around unwanted bodfat, weakened resistance to injury and illness and deterioration in physical appearance. Another big consequence in old age is a significant reduction in mobility, partly due to weakened skeletal muscles. And that’s only a few likely negative consequences.

I have been doing strength training for over 23 years now and have helped hundreds of people of all ages with their body re-engineering goals, with over 80% success rate. I believe strength training is one of the most important things you can do for your appearance and health. Strength training is critical for building muscle, maintaining muscle or more importantly, minimizing muscle deterioration and atrophy.

Results with care. Here, Brad is 'feeling the essence' of the exercise and inching closer to his best self. Vv

Results with care.
Here, Brad is ‘feeling the essence’ of the exercise and inching closer to his best self.
Vv

Muscle is like precious gems – you need to build it and then preserve it. It is the fountain of youth, your magic youth potion.

Stronger muscles produce health benefits that adds to your life. It builds your sense of vitality. Building muscle contributes to reducing the impact of ageing. Strength training helps you stay young for your years. However, strength training is not enough. One needs to combine it with regular structured stretching, consistent cardiovascular work, healthy nutrition, adequate rest and recuperation and a healthy lifestyle.

All this helps you off-set the on-set of ageing.

I have seen them, so perhaps have you. People with that glow. People that are filled with that life-force, that all-important sense of vitality. People who seemed to have gotten closer to the fountain of youth. Most, if not all of them, have consistently and persistently worked on their strength training.

They’ve simply decided to build muscle. No more thinking, no further analysing. They just DID IT. They took action. Think about it – you’re made up of more muscle than anything else. I mean you’re covered with skeleton muscles (that help you move and do what you do every single day), your heart’s a muscle and your stomach’s a muscle too. What do muscles do? Keep it simple … they need to work. It makes sense to ‘work’ your muscles then, doesn’t it?

Muscles are one of the very things that keeps us all alive. But hey, if slowing down the ageing process by building muscle is not convincing enough for you what about if I say that it could help you lose fat. Yep, that’s right, do you want to lose unwanted fat? Well, build muscle. Period!

There are so many organizations and people in the world today that give out fat-loss diet plans that don’t include strength training. This is not ideal. It robs the body of the little muscle it has, making fat loss even more difficult because of reduction of one’s metabolic rate.

This is so common today in many weight-loss programs all around the world, where individuals think that some new ‘fad diet’ will be the answer or some magic supplement. It does not work that way. “That way” is not sustainable and is a huge reason for many victims of the ‘yo-yo’ diet symptoms and millions of dis-illusioned and disappointed individuals with the best of intentions.

Executing an exercise for maximum benefit and minimal risk takes a lot of practise, Just like genuine friendship, genuine muscle requires a lot of work and time. Remember: practise does not make perfect. Perfect practise makes perfect.

Executing an exercise for maximum benefit and minimal risk takes a lot of practise,
Just like genuine friendship, genuine muscle requires a lot of work and time.
Remember: practise does not make perfect. Perfect practise makes perfect.

Its body shape, not body weight that really matters.

Building muscle is the only way you can improve your body-shape and this is achieved through progressively increasing your muscle-fat ratio.

Have a go today, if you haven’t done so already – start a structured strength training program for the most important person in the world to you – YOU. That way, the people that depend on you – your spouse, your kids, your employer, your clients – they get the BEST YOU too. It could be one of the most important decisions you will ever make in your life. More important than the dream house you intend to buy one day. Build that dream house in you, first.

We’re all reminded that people are living longer now. What’s more important I believe is adding LIFE (vitality) in to your years, not just adding years to your life. Most aged people spend the last 20 years with various levels of discomfort and immobility.

Remember though: when you exercise, try to do it as efficiently and effectively as possible, under the safety umbrella. And, don’t try to do everything yourself if it isn’t your area of expertise, you can sometime do more harm than good to yourself.

Let go of all self-imposed limitations and fears and ask for help. It takes a lot of courage to seek help from an appropriately skilled professional with the relevant experience and credentials.

There are a lot of excellent exercise professionals out there, those who give you the results you desire – with care.

Best of luck!

Until next time …

In the heat of competition. Pose name: Abdominal/Thighs. Place in contest: 1st.

In the heat of competition.
Pose name: Abdominal/Thighs.
Place in contest: 1st.

← Back

Thank you for your response. ✨

Standard
a better life, action, adaptation, adequate sleep, ageing, attitude, awareness, better choices, caring, change management, choices, diet, dreams, eating, Energy, game of life, habit, habits, life, long-term perspective, long-term strategy, risk, self improvement, self-respect, sleep, Strength training, success, taking action, truths, Vitality, workout, you, your life

7.5 Key Habits that would reduce your risk of the flu this winter.

Change your philosophy, change your life.
Vv.

My wife and I are celebrating our 10 year wedding anniversary next week. Wow, a wonderful achievement. A milestone reached. I mentioned it to a long-term client and friend of mine and he said:

“well, that is a milestone indeed, Paul. Congratulations. One thing it does say, Paul, is that it reflects the tolerance you both have had for your short-falls in character – your character flaws. It shows you’re willingness to grow and adapt to one another, for your togetherness.”

I thought about this ‘togetherness’ and I agree.

I’ve certainly adapted and she has, too. We have grown individually and together as one. But upon reflection, I realised that before you have adaptation as a choice, one needs to precede it with Awareness followed by the application of Action. Yes, appropriate and relevant action. This then leads to the critical step of Adaptation, if one hopes to have sustainable change.

So, in effect, it is the application of my Triple A to Life Philosophy: Awareness; Action; Adaptation.

There are many ways of approaching a potential risk or problem but you can certainly apply my Triple A approach to improving you personal immunity and reducing your health risks. Lowering your Risks of illness or susceptibility to the common flu or cold if you do get sick quite often during the colder months of the year.

My wife tells me that she has never met or knows anyone in her life so far that gets sick fewer times than me, I think she said that she can only remember me being ‘sick’ (and not a case of ‘man-flu’) a handful of times in the 13 and half years we have been together.

I asked her why she thinks that is the case and she identified some 7.5 key daily habits that she has seen me do consistently since she has been with me.

She said:

Key Habit One: I drink loads of water.

She is true.

I do drink, in my opinion – ‘adequate’ daily requirement of H2O, generally, approximately 1L of water per 20 kg of body-weight. Currently, I am drinking about 4.5L of water per day. Adequate daily levels or water is a huge part of my clients’ success with my body re-engineering programs.

I consistently find that most if not all my clients were not drinking sufficient water at the start of their program.

For the average person, your daily guide should be to drink 1L of water per 25kg-30kg of bodyweight (after taking in to other considerations such as age, exercise experience, activity levels, health condition etc).

Beauty is Truth, truth – beauty. That is all there is on earth ..and all ye need to know.
Be aware of the beauty with and around you.
Don’t just look, ‘see’

Key Habit Two: I eat loads of Dark Green vegetables

She is true, again.

I always tell my clients that if its green and not a frog – eat it!

Yep, load up on your dark green vegetables, something most of you would have been told by adults in your youth. Amongst other things, greens fill you up and addresses your satiety levels better, adds loads of fibre to your bowels and helps the transportation of oxygen through the blood and with it, vital nutrients for the optimal functioning of organs, especially the most vital: the brain.

Guideline: aim to consume 1cup of dark green vegetables (broccoli, spinach or long beans) for at least 1 meal per day for the first 2 weeks and work up to 2 meals per day for the next 2 weeks. See how your body changes and notice how your energies improve. Maintain a minimum of 2 meals per day with dark green vegetables in it for 90 days and see how your good body and mind feel and look. Try it!

Showing a top athlete client of mine what and how I eat. Can you see the dark green vegetables?
If it’s green and not a frog, eat it!

Key Habit Three: I wash my hands loads of times

My wife is absolutely true – again!

I learned way back in primary school that germs and a lot of bad bacteria is spread through the hands and is one of the main instigators of illness. I made a conscious effort all the way back then to keep my hands relatively clean as much as a I possible could, every single day. As a result, I wash my hands before and after almost everything I do. It may be a bit obsessive compulsive now but the risk of not doing so far outweighs the inconvenience of frequently washing hands.

Guideline: Try washing your hands more frequently if you’re not already doing so. Try and become aware of cleanliness of your hands and increase the frequency of hand washing. With soap. Act. Repeat consistently and persistently.

Adapt accordingly.

Key Habit Four: I eat loads of Protein in diet

She said ‘loads’ but I would have to disagree, not ‘loads’ but ‘adequate daily intake requirement’ of protein.

After water, the protein is the most abundant substance in the body. It is the life blood of your being. Yes, I do to ensure that my hard-working muscles get sufficient muscle-replenishing protein for repair work post work-out but also because it fills me up better than the weighed-equivalent amount of carbohydrates or fats, for example:

Give this a try. Eat 200g of chicken breast and 200g of white rice. Compare which one fills you up better and keeps you fuller – for longer. Yep, the chicken does, doesn’t it? Protein is more filling. Protein are the ‘building blocks’ of muscles and the human body and mind. Without adequate levels – you feel like crap and you wilter away like a plant uncared for.

Here’s my guideline: determine what your LBM or lean body mass is (the mass of your body that isn’t fat). If you honestly assess your daily intake of protein for a week, you will find that you would most probably not be eating even daily minimum requirement to maintain your LBM. Apply appropriate action and eat more protein: chicken, fish, lamb, pork, tofu and eggs are great sources. Your guide should be 1g of protein per kg of lean body weight, but of course, you need to consider other factors like age, activity levels, fitness levels etc. So, LOAD UP ON PROTEIN! So, if you’re a 200lbs male, with a normal bodyfat percentage of 25%, your LBM would be about 150lbs. If you exercise 3-5 times per week, then your body would need anywhere between 140g and 180g of protein just to sustain your LBM.

How do you consume that amount of protein every day, you may ask. Well, you need to ‘split’ your meals up and consume more better composed meals. So you may have, for example, 5 meals per day, with 30g per of protein per meal, which totals 150g per day. Sufficient and not excessive by any means. What gives you 30g of protein, you ask? Well, every 30g of lean meat gives you approximately 7g of protein, so you would need 120g of lean meat to give you 28g of protein. That is about a ¼ of what the average male would eat when he eats a piece of steak (anywhere between 350g and 500g) at lunch or worse, dinner in one sitting!

So, think about your portions of meals and adding more frequent, well-compositioned meals.

I hear people say, well, Paul, isn’t it quite pedantic to measure your meat weight and meals?

I say, no. It is necessary! We measure everything else, don’t we? I mean, we rely on measurements with everything else in our lives, think about it, would you not measure how much money you are paying for fuel? What about measuring your feet for proper fitting shoes? What about getting length of trousers wrong, wouldn’t that piss you off? We live with measurements with everything else in our lives except what is going in to our mouths. So, get yourself a scale that graduates all the way down to milligrams and start weighing my friend.

If you can’t measure something, you certainly cannot manage it!

In the gym.
Adequate levels of protein helps repair and build ‘worked’ muscles.
Give your body what it wants … after water, protein is the most abundant substance and everything in the body, every process, comes down to amino acids and the communication between them.
So eat protein I say!

Key Habit Five: I load up when in the gym

She is correct, again.

Since I picked up my first dumbbell at 17 years of age, I have consistently and persistently made gym training a part of my life, becoming entwined in to my chosen lifestyle and a vital and necessary part of me. My life.

I don’t believe in light weights. Period!

To get the best ‘bang out of your buck’ when you’re in the gym, nothing beats free weights and gravity. You need to use MODERATE TO HEAVY weights though and stay away from ridiculously light weights that you see many people use (unless you’re warming up your joints and/or in rehab). For the comparative amount of time you invest in any physical activity, nothing beats the results you get when you DO THE BASICS – in the gym. In terms of efficiency and effectiveness of health, strength and fitness benefits, in the short-term and the long-term, nothing beats the basics. What are the basics? Well, they are:

  • Deadlifts
  • Back Squats
  • Bench Presses

You can throw in some other full body movements like: clean and presses and lat-pulldowns and lunges with a few arm curls and dips. Workout done!

Neuroscience confirms that exercise, specifically weight-training, stimulates neurogenesis – the birth of new brain cells. You get smarter!! An estimated 3 million people (about 12.5% of the population) suffer live with anxiety or depression. A staggering number indeed.

Guess what, regular exercise of moderate to heavy intensity can be an effective adjunct treatment for depression. Both aerobic and strength training are very helpful in treating depression.

Remember: “Health is a state of complete physical, mental and social well-being and not merely the absence of disease or infirmity.” WHO.

Guideline: Get back to BASICS. Keep it FUNCTIONAL. Keep it SIMPLE. With CONTINUITY and PATIENCE. How much exercise then, Paul you ask? Well, the Australian National Physical Activity Guidelines recommend: 

  • doing exercise is better than doing none.
  • be active on most days of the week.
  • Each week try to do 2 1/2 to 5 hours moderate intensity exercise or 11/4 to 2 1/2 hours of vigorous intensity physical activity.
  • Do muscle strengthening activities on at least 2 days each week.

So, there you go. Just do it.

Try it!

Muscle is precious. Build muscle then, do everything you can to preserve it.
I load up in the gym!

Key Habit Six: I limit my intake of sugar

She is not wrong.

I do try and limit my intake of direct sugar but also am aware of the indirect sugars in other foods. To do this I try to eat more foods that come straight from the ground. The less processed the better for you.

Sugar – this insidious killer is not only the most addictive substance on this planet but almost every living human being cannot say no to it. It is the biggest killer of the human race – add up all the deaths caused by every other cause and I bet you will find it pales in comparison to the deaths caused by sugar, either directly or indirectly. That is how serious this matter is.

It is the over-consumption of it that results in many health, and dare I say it, mental problems.

There is direct correlation between food and mood. Meaning, there are clear dose-response relationships between diet and level of mental health and well-being. What I practise is very similar to what Scientists refer to as the “Mediterranean Diet” which emphases high consumption of plants (vegetables, fruits, nuts) and rich in good fats.

How do I do it? Well, whenever I get sugar cravings I substitute with either of the following:

  •  100g of blueberries
  • 150g grapefruit
  • Cup of green tea

My Guideline: become more aware of sugar in foods you put in your mouth and do your best to eliminate direct sugars from you diet, one at a time. Its difficult at first, I know but give it a try – persist. One less teaspoon sugar may just mean lesser health costs later in life. Maybe, a teaspoon less of sugar in your coffee or tea or drop the honey from your cereal.

Neuroscience studies show that eating too much sugar is linked to weight gain (we all know this), obesity, type 2 diabetes and cardiovascular disease (CVD), stroke, high blood pressure (hypertension) and age-related illness of Dementia. Diabetes is the risk factor for cognitive decline and dementia. The widespread assumption that sugar consumption can lead to addiction is inaccurate based on neuroscientific defintions of addiction, tolerance and withdrawal.

Remember this: “What we eat really affects our brain, our behaviour, our neural circuits, and our health in many ways. “ Neuroscience SFN 2014.

A healthy, balance diet encourages a healthy balance of gut microbes and there is a strong and definite Gut-Brain-Microbe connection. Having too much sugar can disrupt the gut-brain balance which disrupt signalling which may lead to abnormal brain function, changes in behaviour, thoughts, emotions, our perception of pain and impact on our immune system.

Resulting in increased susceptability to getting sick and being ill. So, in a roundabout way … try out these key habits to help build your immunity from all facets of being human.

Maybe, eliminate your cereal entirely and just opt for something more nutritious and simple, like spinach and eggs for breakfast, for example and replace that orange or fruit juice with plain water.

Having fun with a star jump!
Live each day like you are dying to live.
Vv.

Key Habit 7.5: I get adequate Quality Rest

True, again.

Notice I said “Rest” and not ‘sleep’. I have seen people who get loads of ‘sleep’, getting ten hours or more per day and wake up feeling more restless than they did before going to bed.

You need to focus on getting quality Rest. That could happen at any time of the day. A little nap during the day for less than 30 minutes would do wonders for your energy and focus levels at work. Note: latest neuroscience confirm that there an ‘urge to nap’ and it is programmed into our circadian rythyms. Taking a < 25 min power nap improves memory and learning, sparks creativity and regulates emotions. More than this results in sleep inertia (you feel overwheming tiredness).

Try it, if you can. The essence of this is to ‘clear your mind’ or ‘quiet your mind’. Such rest is priceless because you release hormones throughout the body and brain that help elevate your energy levels as well as your ability to focus on tasks at hand, for longer periods.

Try taking short periods of ‘rest’ for the body and mind. Almost like a short period of meditation. Find your quiet place and un-think to Rest. Take a page out the Fijian’s Life Book and apply the “Fiji Time” mentality to your life when appropriate, when you need to get away from it all. Learn why this race is consistently rated the Happiest People on the planet. It is not by chance, it is by choice. Their individual and collective choice as a race. They try to keep things simple. I know, because I was born and raised there.

Its not the quantity of rest, but the quality. Getting better at the latter will enhance your sense of being – your “vitality”, that essence of life – your life!

Little by little … every step in the right direction gets you to the destination.
Be like a postage stamp, stick to whatever you’re doing until you get to your destination.
Luck has nothing to do with it.
Hard YAKA and persistence gets you there!

Remember: the compound effect of the application of habits with the power of imagination and self-regulating behaviour is the REAL MEDICINE here. It is what I refer to as your HEALTH AND VITALITY INSURANCE. It is preventative insurance, that adds to a better quality life not only now, but more importantly, in old age.

A little persistence and consistency in the application of the 7.5 habits I have elaborated on may just help improve your overall immunity to the common cold and flu, like it has for me. The reason I have said ‘7.5’ habits is because this is obviously not a definitive list of reasons but it certainly is the Key 7 habits that you are in full control of. Habits that I consistently adopt on a daily basis.

Try them, see how you feel after seven days, after 4 weeks. Try 3 months and all of winter. Then, get in touch with me and tell me all about it.

The application of these key habits should help your overall sense of vitality and lower your risk of feeling like ‘crap’ or low in energy and vitality as frequently as you may have felt. It just might add years to your life – keeping your batteries re-charged.

Remember also that elephants don’t bite, mosquitoes do!

These habits are little things that could become a problem if you don’t take of it. So, take care of the these mozzies and other mosquitoes in your life, if and when you identify them.

As you know, Little Things Matter – simple actions, repeated over time, will determine the life you lead.

Someone once said that practise does not make perfect – perfect practise makes perfect. I agree.

So, become Aware. Apply Action. Adapt accordingly and repeat practice, with good execution …. Within reason. Keep things simple, don’t complicate things and know that everything will be ok in the end.

Best of health and vitality to you!

 

Yours in iron & muscles.

Until next time …

 

Here we are … my beautiful wife and I.
at a dinner party.

The Old Captain Viking Pirate Fiji Island Muscle Monk

On a beach in one of my favourite parts of the world.
Enjoying the sun again.

The Power of Habit.
The dedication to small, yet, important key habits on a daily basis helped me represent Australia at not one, but two consecutive World Natural Physique Championships, placing in the Top 5 in the World in both.
An island boy born and raised in the Fiji Islands went all the way to be one of the BEST in the world.
That is the power of the compound effect of little things done consistently over time.
Try the 7.5 key habits and see how well your immune system gets…. and then tell me all about it.

Standard
dreams, risk

Clothed in overcoats

Life is full of opportunities.

Some people are born with silver spoons in their mouths. Their parents are rich and understanding. And the children can take up any activity that they fancy. Not always successfully.

Most of us, however, are not that lucky. We have to achieve whatever success we can through our own efforts and possibly the support of family, and sometimes complete strangers.

It is important that you recognize those opportunities as they come along. Sometimes opportunities come clothed in overcoats, and you don’t realize it until the coats come off.

It is important that you recognize chances as they come along. Grasp them with both hands, give them a good shake, and say “Thank you”.

Don’t let fear hold you back, grasp these chances with all your might and stare fear in the face. I have always believed life is a huge exercise in Risk Management. So, take the risk … admittedly, after an educated assessment of the initial risk and implementing measures to help mitigate the risk to a personally acceptable level. Ask for help. Ask for help from the right people if you’re not sure. You don’t want to go to a florist if you need help with a plumbing business idea, for example.

Don’t be afraid to ask, it takes more courage to ask then not to and it saves you from a lot of potential pit-falls in the future. Take the opportunity and the attached risk or risks that go with it. Appeal to the “David” in you as you face up to the apparent Goliath ahead of you.

No risk – no nothing. Period!

So, set your plan and work your plan, even if you don’t have all the information available before you act. Work them, work your plan, work them, work them … and never, ever, ever  …. Give up. Life is already full enough with people who have ‘given up’. Don’t add to the world’s burden. Take charge, take life by the hands and give your chances the best, the best of – YOU!

When you do recognize these limited opportunities, always keep in mind that the BEST of YOU, requires that you be the BEST SERVANT you can be. Nothing more. Nothing less. With this philosophy steadfastly etched in your mind, in your way of life, in the way you walk …  the way you talk … the way you relate to people and animals and the way you relate to the BEST YOU, be prepared to embrace all that you receive. With gratitude.

I think someone great worded it terrifically in the years gone by – saying that there is a universal law of reciprocity.

Whether you believe so or not, understand that what you get out of life is not directly proportional to what you put in, no, I believe, what you get out of life is directly proportional to what you give without expecting, genuinely not expecting anything in return.

It is difficult to do, but try it and most importantly, persist.

You may only get one, two, or three opportunities in a lifetime. Make the most of it.

If you are religious – think of it as God’s blessing.

If you are not so inclined, put it down to fate.

 

Until next time ….

Standard
life, needs

Hap … Happy … Happiness …

Are you happy? Well, are you?

I’m sure every one who reads this and everyone on this planet has thought about this at one point or another in their life. So, are you? How do you know? Well, I guess, you could identify things or events or people that make us happy quite easily but seriously, are you happy?

What is happiness anyway? It’s one of those questions that many philosophers and thinkers have wrestled with for centuries. Is it something that is intrinsic – coming from within, somewhere deep within us, our souls, our spirits maybe or is it something that comes from without – external from us, our environment? Some of you may argue both makes you happy.

Hang on, lets look at it again. Is happiness the same thing as being ‘happy’? I don’t think so but I am not going to try and explain that one in this blog. Investigate that for yourself. See what you find. Someone wise once said something to the effect that the very pursuit of happiness is in itself, futile. Happiness could be said to be something that brings you pleasure, but even this cannot ever be a sufficient enough condition of happiness. Many cannot differentiate between genuine and authentic pleasure and fake or inauthentic pleasure. The former brings about a memory of fulfiment, like, say, the enduring love of a special friend, compared to the fake-pleasure of a drug, for example.

In our society, happiness, may be seen as the desire for and acquisition of material goods and services. However, could this be a ‘happiness party-pauper’? Is wanting too much making everyone feel less happy? Some of the poorest nations of the world have their citizens being the happiest – countries like Fiji, Costa Rica etc. Where does your country sit on the happiness scale? Maybe the western world can learn a thing or two about the beliefs and philosophies of these people, where maybe, in terms of material possessions – less is sometimes more.

Is it possible that, in the more developed countries like ours, happiness is hard to find and keep because of the insatiable desire to buy stuff, yep stuff. All that ‘stuff’ that fills up garages and storerooms, inevitably creating more and more clutter in one’s lives and minds. Stuff we don’t really need, buying them just to make us happy. More and more of everyones’ leisure and ‘family time’ seem to be taken up by the employer, mounting up more hours in meaningless jobs to buy consumer goods. Consumer goods that we are lied to by smart marketers and advertisers, making us buy, buy, buy … brain-washing us to believe that the possession of these goods will ‘bring you happiness’. What a load of you know what! Consumerism itself maybe the golliath that needs to be floored by a brave individual, before happiness is revealed.

You could try these 3 things to help you get closer to happiness:

  • Find your ‘authentic self’
  • Don’t fill your time on weekends maintaining a carpet of grass or renovating kitchens and bathrooms or the like
  • Do spend your time ‘filling your mind’ with mental nutrition

Firstly, I would suggest, you try to be more self-aware. Then, of course, do your very best to meet all your needs and then with whatever resources you have, you may seek to get some of your wants satisfied. Not the other way ‘round. We all allow and see the goods we have as an extension of ourselves like the car you drive, and watch you wear. We then commit more and more hours to the drudgery of work to pay for it all. But how much is enough? Will having more ‘bling’ than your neighbours bring you closer to being happier? Does the acquisition of these stuff make you feel more successful as a human being and less of a failure?

Let me ask you a question: Do you think the very rich are the happiest? I would argue that may be they aren’t. Why? Well, one of the reasons maybe because, they’re always trying to be the richest. Its like a bodybuilder trying to be the guy with the biggest muscles – almost impossible, because, just around the corner, there is always someone bigger, or soon-to-be bigger, rising up the ranks. Everywhere you turn, there is somebody bigger. Endlessly disappointing. It can drive people crazy!

Someone once told me that ‘bigger isn’t necessarily better’ and I think the same can be said about richness.

However, here’s a little secret: try viewing your finite life, each of the 86,400 seconds in a day from now on, from your death-bed’s view. I think you would come to conclude ‘happiness’ would include most if not all those ‘moments’ – points in time, that are free from the trappings of money or status and filled with authenticity.

Capture and treasure those ‘moments’ forever.

Here’s to you finding your authentic self: to hap … happy … happiness.

Until next time …

Standard
body, Energy, life, time, Vitality

Vitality – the essence of life.

My blog name is Valentine Vitality.

Unlike my surname, I adopted the word Vitality not only because it flows off the tongue quite smoothly when used with Valentine, but mainly because I love the word “Vitality”.

Vitality is such a beautiful word. It is all encompassing, like the word heaven. Vitality is the essence of life itself.

A quick reference to the internet and you will find many sub-meanings but I particularly like these two:

  1. the capacity to live, grow or develop and
  2. the principle or force that distinguishes living things from non-living

It also represents ‘energy’. Most of us can be accused of doing our very best to better manage our time. We have been constantly reminded since we were in school of the importance of becoming better time managers. Thousands of books are written every year telling us how to manage our time better, with us wiry-eyed taking notes about how to manage our 86,400 seconds in a day, better, from the many management gurus out there. Does this really help?

In some instances, yes. But in most, I believe – no.

Why? Simply because we are following a paradigm or philosophy that is flawed and  we continuously allow ourselves to be bombarded with views from so-called ‘experts’. We should mainly view our daily life not in terms of how ‘busy’ I am and how great I am at managing ‘my time’. No, instead, I believe, we should adopt a more important paradigm/philosophy as more paramount and start a revolution to become better managers of our energy.

Yes, energy.

What is more important than becoming better at time management – it is becoming better at ‘energy management’ which brings you closer to managing your ‘vitality’ or ‘charge’ or ‘life-force’ within you. To do this, you need to find your ‘re-charge point’, your place of serenity. I find mine in the gym. Some may find it in the garden. Others spending time crocheting or with their cars. Those of you who have something, hang on to it. Those of you who don’t, it is imperative for your life, to find it and start re-charging. All things need re-charging. If your mobile phone and computer need it. So do you, my friend!

Everything in your life, either adds to or steals from your vitality, your life force. Be aware of this, diligently.

I once read that if you love life, life will love you back.

You see, I have seen them, so perhaps have you.

People who love life, with bright eyes, taut skins and great smiles. They look as if they have been freshly scrubbed or newly minted, exuding the very definition of Vitality.

How do they do it?

Partly through respect for their bodies, spirit, thoughts and deeds.

You see, Vitality, does not seem to be as objective as weight, exercise, diet etc. It is more subjective. It seems to come from within and rather intrinsic rather than achieved through outwardly efforts(extrinsic).

When you find one of these people with that glow, ask them their secret. Then, contact me please, and tell me all about it.

If a few readers of this blog do this, we might be able to deduce the magic formula worth more than a rainbow’s pot of gold.

Become part of that search, today.

Best of vitality to you!

 

Until next time …

Standard
a better life, action, adaptation, awareness, Beliefs, better choices, consciousness, decisions, examined life, game of life, habits, Imagination, leadership, life, long-term perspective, long-term strategy, perspective, respect, responsibility, you

Plant your Oak Tree

The Oak – 7 x Mr Olympia, Arnold Schwarzennegger

Don’t just be any tree, be an Oak Tree

Have you ever thought of the Oak Tree?

I have. Thing is .. I like Trees.

Very early in life when my fascination with muscle and bodybuilding began, I learned that the great Arnold Schwarzenegger was nick-named “The Oak”. Just like the oak tree – big, enduring, aesthetically balanced and strong through the course of time, it weathered all types of weather. Oak trees can live up to 300 years old. The Oak Tree got me thinking about life…. how, maybe, we should not just be any tree, but … be an Oak Tree.

Imagine for a second what would it feel like to plant an Oak Tree?

Now, the actual planting of the tree would obviously give you a lovely feeling at that point in time. I mean, there is not a chance in the world you would be around to see the little seed grow in to the magnificent tree that it is to be. They live up to 300 years!

Now, imagine, one may be two hundred years on, some person may look up and admire its beauty and grandness but would never even think of you – of the person who made a conscious choice to plant that little seed in place. No one would thank YOU. No one would remember you for it. So, why would you even consider doing it then?

How would such an irrational action give you so much pleasure?

The Best decisions are always made with a  bit of irrationality … a bit of heart inclusion.

Well, there are many reasons, but I believe that maybe, just maybe, more of our decisions in life should be made with the Oak Tree in mind. I think we need to look at our life from a different perspective – a ‘long-term perspective’, from the perspective of the Oak Tree. Yep, the tree.

I think we should be making decisions that matter in life just because it seems right. At that point in time and would seem right in the days that you depart this beautiful planet. We need to make decisions from the Oak Tree’s view, one that is a long-term perspective.

Feel the interconnectedness of everything
Live 4 2day

To have an “Oak decision” means to make a decision with a long-term perspective

Ask yourself this question: how many areas in the rest of your life that has the ‘Oak Tree’ view or longer-term perspective?

Most people live their lives looking for short-term or quarterly business results; the next season’s trends, gadgets and fashion; the next season’s flowers or at best a crop or business investment that would have a two or three year pay-off. I understand that. It is a fact of life. However, why is it that the best and great family businesses have a more longer-term view or perspective in mind, always.

Well, from my small research in to longevitiy of businesses, typically, the founding business owners would make decisions that would have their children or grandchildren reap the benefits. Not necessarily, them. Their business growth, expansion, their bigness comes down to one of perspective, one of long-term strategy, taking the Oak Tree perspective. Something which, in today’s world most businesses find it so hard to cultivate.

This applies to individuals too. Like you, too. To have an Oak Decision meanse to make a decision with Long-term perspective. For example, when I picked up my first set of weights, I knew that I would include the weight training as a part of my whole life but I was also going to be ont he world stage competing against the best bodybuilders in the world.

I made my decision with a long-term perspective … an Oak Tree approach. I gave myself 10 years.

I got to 2 x World Competitions.

Me my extended family members; a group of members of my family gym.
They all loved training and being part of the extended family that was my gym
Relationship take time to develop .. just like an Oak Tree needs time to grow

There is no such thing as “Lay-By” these days

The short-term perspective is all around us – everywhere.

It is a disease of the modern age, but just like most diseases, it can be managed or better still, cured.

Instant gratification, that is. People don’t seem to practise delayed gratification anymore. There is no such thing as a “Lay-by” these days, when purchasing a product/want. People want new version of products now and pay for it immediately too. Great for business, but what does it say about the direction society is heading?

Lets have a look at politicians, for example.

Modern politicians live with constant need to win the next election, which is on average, two or three years away, if they are not ambushed out of government by their own before election day. However, parties that have better intrinsic values take office to decide on policies which may not produce results for ten years or more. Lets hope our politicians are adopting this Oak Tree perspective.

Most religions believe in life after death of some sort. Christianity believes in life after death. Maybe, it is the Christian way and message to live and make decisions now, so that others may benefit later …. So that there is life, after your life is gone, there is life – others’ lives after your death.

Imagination is power, as the saying goes … but I don’t fully agree with that statement –

I say –

“Knowledge is potential power. Applied knowledge is power’

… so try and imagine planting your Oak tree or trees today that represent your decisions in all areas of your life … and feel great about it. Not only just because it feels right for you, now but it is the right thing to do for your future generations.

Plant your Oak Tree, today!

Until next time …

Have a long-term perspective on decisions you make in life

Cheers & Ahoy!!

 

The old Cap’n Viking Pirate … & making decision with the long-term view in mind

 

Standard
Energy

Same but different.

Finding good teachers in life is like finding a needle in a haystack. Its difficult to find. Improbable but not impossible. In your life so far, you have had many teachers, even before you had a choice with some of them. Some included your parents, your grandparents, your pre-school and kindergarten teachers, your primary and high school teachers, aunties, uncles, neighbours and so on. I can confidently say that you would be hard-pressed to name more than one or two that were really good at teaching. Why don’t you try counting. Even parents can be very bad teachers. Try and give them an honest, objective assessment if you dare. This is one of the reasons why you should always assess and question why you do things the way you do as it could be based on a belief system that had been imprinted in your brain by the many incompetent teachers in your life so far, as they did not entertain other truths or did not know any better for whatever reason. They spoke in absolutes.

Change in belief system ==> change in attitude ( due to change in perception) ==> change in choices/actions ==> change in habits ==> change in character ==> change in your destiny and where your ship ends up in life.

I have had many teachers in many areas of life in my life so far and I can confidently say that in my undergraduate years at University, I qualify only one lecturer was a good. Incidentally, over 20 years on we are still friends and still communicate. Having a good teacher can save you time. Lots of time and it does not matter which area of life it is. It can save you money and it can certainly lower risks of failure and it could save your life. First, I think the student needs to be aware of where he wants to go and what he would like to achieve. There is a saying “the teacher arrives when the student is ready”. There is a truth to that, I think. The universe conspires to manifest its reality for you if you so desired.

This favourite teacher of mine used to have a habit of saying something that contained two words that meant the opposite of each other. For example, when explaining a concept he would utter – ‘now this law is simple but difficult’ or ‘what this individual did was bad but good simultaneously’. Years after I graduated, I caught up with him for a drink at a bar and I asked him why he spoke like that. His answer had a profound impact on me and my life since then. Here’s what he said.

There are no complete truths. No one can speak on any one topic in this world with 100% certainty that what he thinks or speaks is completely definitive. Everything is relative and we should not speak in absolutes. There is a duality, a ying and yang, like night is to day, to everything in life. Our challenge, he said is to find that balance, in our journey through life.

Become the best teacher you can be because the only history you have total control of is your history while you are alive, not your ancestors’ history. Yours! You have control of how you interpret the truth of your reality as you live your life, from ‘your own eyes’. Your perception is your reality.

I asked him, what is the one thing that could help me become a better teacher. He said, “Paul, become a better storyteller”. Write your history.

The world needs more storytellers. The world needs more dreamers. Storytelling harnesses imagination and imagination is the gate to most powerful thing you have: your subconscious mind. Some may call it: your spirit. Your soul.

You can be the same as everyone else but make a difference with your storytelling, your imagination. Become a better storyteller and write YOUR history, from your perception. Its your life, after all and it ain’t a dress rehearsal. If you don’t, someone else will write if for you, from their eyes, their perception.

Enjoy being the same but different. Appreciate your difference and make a difference to your world. Its ok to be a simple, but complex individual.

Imagination is potential power. Believe it so.

Start dreaming and … untap your potential today!

Until next time …. 

 

Standard
body, life, mind

Be more selfish. For you. For your life.

I have asked the following question in many of my prior blogs. Matter of fact, I started the blog before the very last one I did with the question: “Do you love, you?” Well, do you? Do you really? I am going to challenge you to that.

So before we answer that, firstly lets ask ourselves “who are you?” If I may, I could answer it one way: you’re composed of many things, but fundamentally YOU can be said to be composed of body, spirit and mind.

The first is yours to feed and maintain up-keep. The second, rather intangible, a lot of people struggle with feeding and maintaining up-keep. We’ll elaborate on this in a later blog. The third is truly yours. Yours to feed and manage. Completely.

Back to my question at the start. I have always wondered that if everyone did indeed, love himself/herself, then why is it then that they seem to rate their own judgement of themselves below that of others? How is that so? Have you asked yourself that question? Why do you have more respect for what your neighbors think of you than you have of yourself?

So, do you love yourself – all body, spirit and mind? If you did then I think you would not even consider what your neighbors thought of you or any less than you thought of yourself. Its because of this, that I ask if you really love yourself. I think we have to try to define what love is first. How would you define it? We can all see it in action all around us – see kids with their pets, observe couples holding hands down the street, notice the gift-giving looks during Valentine’s Day. We all know elements of what we think love is. I looked up the definition of it in the book that knows all the answers: the Bible. Love is defined as “ … patient, .. kind … does not envy .. does not boast. It is not proud and not rude. Not self-seeking and not easily angered. It does not revenge and always protects, always trusts .. hopes. Never fails [1 corinthians, ch. 13]. I can confidently predict that we’re all failures, some with a capital F!

Now, can you honestly say that you love yourself in that manner. Not me. Does not mean that I don’t try but I fail on some aspect almost every day. Like I said in a previous blog, you might as well succeed through failure. Don’t stop trying. Aim to love yourself more, each and every day, through your body, spirit and mind. So, how do you know if you love you?

When you’re being selfish!

Yep, I know this will come as a bit of a shock as it goes against everything we have been taught and learned in our lives thus far, regarding the necessity of altruism. We all succeed with this definition of love, we all handsomely succeed. We’re all champions at being selfish. So, from this standpoint, don’t give prominence to what you’re neighbors think of you. Do you agree?

My challenge and homework for you is every time you do something that you think is selfish, take note and tally it in a book over a week. Ask yourself, does my definition hold true to varying degree. Don’t fret about your tally. It confirms that you love the most important person in the world: YOU.

One more challenge: become more selfish.

Standard
life, mind

A lunch date that could change your life.

Know anyone that is and has been down on his/her luck?

For a while. For a long while, maybe.

Someone, who, we probably don’t think about when we give away to charity, maybe in the envelope at church or someone, we don’t give a second of thought about when we give our ‘loose change’ to a street beggar as we walk by, flipping those gold coins in to his box.

What if I said that the most intelligent person I ever knew so far told me once that there is no secret to success, no hidden pot of gold.

I was baffled.

I asked him about the proliferation of ‘get rich’ books, seminars, talks etc that has flooded the market and he said that you can learn lessons from them to lower your risks by not repeating their mistakes. However, the very pursuit of success is futile, he said.

I was baffled.

Disputed a lot I had learned to that point in my life, to that point. He then said that if I wanted to find out the secret to success in life, go ask one of the many street beggars out to an expensive lunch and ask him about all the decisions he made in life to that point. Take notes. And then make sure you don’t make those same mistakes.

Thank him for his time.

I did not have to look very far. I found a distant family member, down on his luck. Had been down on his luck for a few decades. Did what my wise old friend said, I took him out to an expensive and tasty lunch. A fulfilling lunch date. Had a great meal.

We can define success in many ways. I don’t know what yours is but this is one way of discovering a plausible pathway to your success in your life. Even if you did not want to take out a ‘down and out’ person to lunch, just try taking someone you respect and admire out to lunch just to enjoy their company. They could be very successful in their respective field. Or not. Even if you don’t think you could gain anything in that experience, take the risk. No risk, no – nothing! Just enjoy that person’s company during lunch and put both ears to the test. You may just learn something. Be as open-minded as you can and try to really listen. Try to frame your mind in to their frame of mind. That little something that you may learn may come at that point or a day later or a month later or may come many years later.

Don’t rush it. Don’t think too much.

I learned a few things on that lunch date. Had a few enlightened ‘moments’. I have found that enlightened moments and the most useful thoughts tend to come to you when you are not thinking. You need to unthink to think. That something may come to you, then. That something just may change your life forever.

That lunch date changed my life, a little. For the better. Hope yours does, too.

Until next time …

Standard
life, mind

Two ears. One mouth. Practice Re-Framing.

Do you listen well? How do you know? I heard someone say once that you have two ears and one mouth, use it in that ratio. How many of you honestly do? Its all part of being a great communicator. Do you try to project yourself through ‘active listening?’. What is that anyway? After introducing yourself to someone, do you become a listener or do you just take over the conversation and well, get them to listen? I know I have been guilty of that. Have you? Listeners tend to know that they learn a great deal while talkers learn nothing.

Do you draw the other person ‘out’ in your conversation with him/her? Do you ask for examples or ask to explain things in another way, a more simpler way? Do you give feedback and try to reiterate what you learned. Did you know that by doing so, by actually, genuinely giving your ears to someone and really listening, you give the best communication gift of all: paying value to others.

You see, this idea of communication boils down to one thing: attitude. An attitude of the mind. An attitude that can become a whole way of life, if you make it. Let me elaborate …

When you make the other person’s interest first, when you have someone else’s interest at heart, not just your own, the other person can sense it. You could call it a sixth sense. Everyone, whether you know it or not, have their own individual frequencies, and telegraph or communicate what’s really going on, on the inside, on the outside. Not even the best actor can hide it. So, when people know that you’re listening to them because your attitude is service-oriented, not self-oriented, people can read it loud and clear. The opposite is also true, as people can get an uneasy feeling when they talk with a person who has only his own interests in mind and not theirs. Ask yourself one question: who do you trust more – someone who listens to you or someone who forces their viewpoints and opinions on to you?

To improve listening to the words of others, try to frame your mind as theirs. We can call this re-framing. Try ‘seeing’ it from the other person’s viewpoint, the other person’s frame-of-view. Re-frame your mind in to the other person’s frame-of-mind. Some people call this empathy.

You could sum up by saying: say more, with less. But throw away the ‘old frame’ (opinions and belief system you have adopted even before you were old enough to think and question the basis of and ….)

…. begin with a new frame – a new belief system. You re-frame your mind … your thoughts … your attitude … to improve your communication skills and ultimately, communicate more effectively. To others. To you.

Re-frame. One thought at a time.

So re-frame your mind, my friends. Two Ears. One Mouth. Use them in that ratio.

Until next time …

Standard