action, adaptation, awareness, Beliefs, courage

Two sides of the same coin.

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What is intrinsic to all living things? Have you thought of that?

Each of us would have our own unique view of this and you could probably list many intrinsic values that you consider paramount. That is great. To me, two of the most basic, most fundamental and what I consider the most intrinsic to all living things are:

  1. Freedom
  2. The search for purpose or meaning to our existence

The first is vital and encompasses so much of what it means to be alive and to be truly human. Most of us have our own definitions of this. That is fine. The second point forms part of our being and is part of our essence. Part of being human – our search for meaning and purpose for our own self and of everything that is external to us and that which we are a part of. Our search for a purpose-driven life.

Each of us has a story and we’re all somewhat authors of our stories. We’re also part of our ancestor’s stories. We’re all part of a continuous story, adding chapter after chapter to our history. Individual history and community’s history. All this history is an integral part of each of us, of how we came to be.

Unless you attempt to understand the history of a situation, the history of you and your family, The history of your community, the history of a country, the history of a civilization, the history of a race, the history of a religion – you cannot begin to understand and ever hope to solve problems that you may be facing in the current day. Support freedom in all its forms.

Continue searching for your purpose, your meaning to your life. Ask yourself what is it that drives your life? We are all driven by something at any point in time. What is driving you now? Knowing your purpose gives meaning to your life but can you honestly say that you know your life’s purpose right now? If you do, fantastic. How can you tell yourself what you were created for? You didn’t create yourself, did you? You don’t have the owner’s manual (like that which comes with an IKEA product we use to assemble) that reveals your life’s purpose, do you?

Where should you begin then? Where should we all begin?

I see the answers lay in your decision to pursue one of two options – the two sides of the same coin.

On one side, you could try to do it all on your own, this is the side which most people choose to search for answers through self-help. That is one way indeed. Yes, this can and does lead many to great success but does not necessarily give you the answers of your life purpose. This side of the coin is one of speculation, one of guessing nature.

The other side of the same coin would be to ask for help and seek help from your inventor, your creator. It is God’s word and not the world’s wisdom that will reveal your purpose to you.

You could, no, you must start with God!

On this side of the coin you accept that you did not create yourself and neither did your parents. You were not an accident. Your birth was no mistake or mishap and your life is no fluke of nature. You are not the sole author of your life and your history as well. Your parents may not have planned you but God did. You were made by God and for God.

With this side of the coin you have to believe that you were custom-made by God and he had input in to everything that is YOU now!

You have to believe in God. God made you for a reason. And do you know why?

Well, simply because God loves you. God is love. The way I see it, this should be the cornerstone of your life, of everyone’s life. It is an eternal truth. Start your search not by tossing the coin but by choosing the side of the coin that is through God. Let him reveal your life’s purpose to you.

Don’t be mistaken though, being successful and fulfilling your life’s purpose isn’t really the same thing. No it isn’t. You could run the risk of achieving all your personal goals and becoming a great success in your field, but still miss the purposes for which God created you.

All the very best in your search for your life’s purpose as I think one of life’s greatest tragedies is not death but a life without purpose.

Remember, the coin always has two sides. Choose well.

Until next time,

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action, adaptation, awareness, Beliefs, hope, life

Don’t wait for Perfect.

Relaxed with dumbells. Relaxed with dumbells.

Case-by-case basis.

One of the things that I have learned in my life so far is that life is not perfect.

I learned long ago not to expect it to be. The thing is, Life was never meant to be perfect and it (Life) never will be. This is just one sub-set of the significant area of Awareness.

You can address this imperfection in life in many ways and determine the response on a ‘case-by-case’ basis. A sound strategy, theoretically anyway.

Feel the hurt, the disappointment.

One way I have adapted to this truth that ‘life is not perfect’ is just trying to be the best I can be. I learned this a long, long time ago from one the best teachers I have ever had in my life, about life – my grandfather.

He was a man of few words but he was wise. A few times I returned from school with less than expected results and I felt disappointed, he would always say to ‘feel’ the hurt, the disappointment.

My grandfather would sit down with me and say “be the best you can be, boy! Be the best you can be. That’s all you have to do.” The operative word is ‘trying’ as sometimes one’s patience can be tested. I strongly believe that you just have to make the very best of it – Life that is.

Learn from your errors and try not to repeat it. Every error, every mistake is just a reminder that you’re human and that you are far from perfect. In all situations. Try to be proactive. Choosing to respond rather than to react.

Have an open mind and an open heart.

To fully immerse yourself in life, I think you have to have an open mind and an open heart. Having a closed mind and heart can be very limiting to you. With this open mind and open heart, you can fully embrace whatever life offers you – good and bad, scary and friendly.

Life could offer you either the ugly or the beautiful. Most of the time you don’t know what to expect. Reminds me of that line Tom Hanks said in the “Forest Gump” movie:

“Life is like a box of chocolate. You never know what you’re gonna get.”

And do you know why? 

Simply because life is not perfect. Don’t make it out to be.

I say, reach out and absorb everything life hands out to you – the good and the bad; the scary and the friendly and the ugly and the beautiful. Absorb everything. Respond sufficiently and appropriately. Adapt accordingly.

Then say thank you to your God.

Be present, everywhere.

You may ask why? Well, for one thing – you’re alive! Wherever you are (as you read this) – be here, be there.

Be present, everywhere. You have 86,400 seconds a day. My challenge to you is to live, really live those 86,400 seconds. Everyday. Hint: be present….. Except for those 28,800 seconds you’re asleep.

Life doesn’t get any better than this – in the “NOW”, that is …. For now, anyway.

Because the one thing we all have in us is our innate ability to HOPE, but not just hope, we need ACTIVE Hope. Active Hope is believing “it will be” and having the courage to take sufficient and appropriate actions towards making it a reality. “It” being whatever it is you desire so deeply.

Never stop believing. Never. 

And don’t wait for Perfect …. To happen before taking action. Before making a decision/taking the opportunity/making a choice. And we all know what happens when we choose, don’t we?

We are responsible.

All the very best in your decisions and continue to be more inquisitive about life.

Until next time,

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adaptation, awareness, belief systems, Beliefs, change, courage

Nobody can teach you WHO YOU ARE.

Who are you?

Yes, who are YOU?

Have you asked yourself that question? Yes, maybe once, twice, countless times or maybe never.

From when we are children, most of us have already been asked the question about “what we want to become”.

Right from a young age most of us have had the question fired at us. “Son/daughter what do you want to become when you’re older – a doctor, a lawyer, a fireman, an engineer, a carpenter … ?”

Most of us are brought up in a culture that tells us “you are what you do.”

In my 23 years in the gym and talking to thousands of people, I have found that when people are asked “tell me about yourself”, most people immediately talk about their career as if it was the ‘be all and end all’ about them. A complete definition of ‘who and what they are.’

I think there should be a clear distinction between who the person is and the activity they perform as part of their ‘job’. We’re all just individuals and we’re all doing something. But that something should not define who we are. That is only a small part of who we are, who YOU ARE.

It is important that you never forget that YOU are more important than what you do.

Always.

Keep working towards discovering the REAL YOU. Not the YOU that your career defines you as or the YOU that you work very hard to fulfil others’ perceptions of you. Find the real YOU. That is a journey indeed. A journey in to the heart of darkness as the great author Joseph Conrad described so eloquently.

You need to constantly build on the first ‘A” of my Triple A Approach to Life and Whole-self development and that is to increase ‘Awareness’. Awareness of no one else but YOU, of your SELF. I believe that this is the first step towards any worthwhile, sustainable personal development – to be more aware.

You will find that the more aware you become, more and more of your problems and most of the stress in your life will dissolve too. But, there is a price to pay to develop this awareness. A great thinker once said that “Awareness, in and of itself, is transformative.” This is almost spiritual-like, as you ‘clean up your own act you find that you build a profound effect on the world around you.

You see, there is a connection – a definite nexus between ‘what you do inside and what happens in your life’ and when you work on increasing your awareness, you are forced to consider and question your belief system and various beliefs that comprise it. Some of which had been adopted by you as a choice or without a choice when you were growing up. These beliefs helped form your perception of reality. Your version of ‘the truth’. You kept these beliefs because in kept you safe in your family while growing up.

But times change. You grow up. Those beliefs which influence the way you feel and behave attract certain situations and people in to your life and what situations and people you become attracted to. So, it follows that what you BELIEVE generates most of what happens in your life. When you work at increasing your awareness of YOU, you will come to this conclusion too.

So, my point is this, by increasing your awareness, you will question certain beliefs that may have served you well when you were a kid up until you were 10 years old but does not serve your purposes now, TODAY. It kept you safe or you felt a sense of security when you hung on to these beliefs in your family when you were child.

Here’s the thing, I have found that with increased awareness, you are able to LET GO certain beliefs but you have got to be brave to do so because it is difficult. Matter of fact it is one of the scariest things to do if you’re not used to it. Letting go a belief takes a lot of courage and you have to summon up the courage to do it if you are serious about getting the best out of your life.

“Why?” you may be asking, “should we LET GO these beliefs?”

Well, its simple: because you CANNOT keep believing something that DOES NOT serve you! That is one possible definition of insanity.

But don’t rush it. We’re all at different levels of awareness so go easy on yourself. It takes some time and practice to get good at it, just like anything else, for example we’re all at different levels in our training in the gym when it comes to lifting weights and building muscle.

So, if you accept that what you believe generates most of what happens in your life, and if you don’t like attracting the same kinds of situations or people in to your life then you have got to let go of those ‘self-limiting beliefs’ that are holding you back.

A lot of the price you have to pay to create your new perception of reality is: YOUR ATTITUDE and you are 100% totally responsible for that, aren’t you?

There is no doubt that what you pay attention to determines a lot of what happens in your life. True indeed. So, with an attitude of gratitude make a decision to pay attention to or FOCUS on what you want from life, not what you don’t want.

When I was in my teens , I saw the world with a different philosophy to the way I see the world in my twenties and it was different still in my thirties. My picture of the world and my definition of truth has changed considerably. The ‘truth’ as we see it is really our version of the world based on our beliefs and belief systems.

They, however, don’t necessarily have anything TO DO WITH THE TRUTH. They are versions of the truth. Not absolute truth, only relative truth.

Therefore, if truth is relative and does not have 100% certainty, DO NOT FEAR letting go self-limiting beliefs – beliefs that DO NOT SERVE YOU well, anymore. Accept that if ‘the truth’ changes and is dynamic, not static then there is no need to remain RIGID in your beliefs that feed the truth.

There are not many certainties in life but one thing I know with a high degree of certainty is that EVERYTHING CHANGES.

Everything!

So go with the flow and so be like water and be fluid and flexible with your beliefs and find the REAL YOU, who you ARE, what your real needs are (as opposed to the things you just want) and when you are living according to your REAL needs (somewhat achieved through spiritual growth).

That is probably a point where you will teach yourself more of WHO YOU ARE.

Nobody, I repeat – NOBODY can teach you who you are …. But the REAL YOU!

All the best in your decision.

Until next time,

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action, adaptation, ageing, life

Give ‘The Finger’ and feel good about it.

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It was only yesterday that I had to GIVEthe finger. And I felt good about it.

You must be thinking, “gee Paul, isn’t that a bit vulgar?!”

Well, you’re entitled to think what you want to think, but before you form an opinion, read a little further.

I give ‘the finger’ at least once a week here in Sydney and it gives me a sense of gratitude when I do. For me, this gesture that involves “the finger” is just one of the many ways, however small it is, to GIVE.

Yes, you read right – to GIVE. I really feel great when I give ‘the finger!’.

Let me elaborate…

Olivia and I were on our way home from our ‘Daddy-daughter’ excursion yesterday. As we turned off the main road, I slowed the car as I saw an elderly lady on the curb wishing to cross.

I came to a complete stop, looked up at the lady as I raised ‘the finger’ (my index finger) and she smiled at me.

The finger was raised (some of you probably raise the hand) with a little nod of the head and a responsive smile, acknowledging her and giving her right of way to cross the road. The elderly lady slowly made her way, moving her aged frame, step by step past the front of the car. I studied her movements and tried to ‘feel’ the discomfort she was feeling as she walked.

My observations told me that she obviously had postural issues that impacted on her ease of mobility (in this case, simply walking). It appeared she had excessive scoliosis and her gate was severely limited. And the expression on her face gave me some idea of the pain she was experiencing each step she took.

But I wondered, no I am certain she wasn’t always like this. She once was walking straighter, bouncing around full of vitality and walking as if there wasn’t a care in the world. When she was younger …. Part of HER STORY.

Everyone has a story. She is writing hers as you are the author of yours.

It makes me think about the millions of other aged persons in the world who experience unwanted discomfort in carrying out the most basic of tasks like walking, every single day. Not a nice way to live out the remainder of their lives.

It is a slippery slope for a lot of older men and women from a physical stand-point. For all of us actually as we are constantly ageing.

Fewer skeletal muscles due to atrophy and lack of muscle-use compounds the difficulties experienced in mobility (refer to my previous blog for top 3 pointers to get started).

But the thing is – physical pain is not the worst part!

No, I believe it is the mental, spiritual and emotional pain.

The lack of mobility leads to the worst problem: the persons’ deteriorating ‘sense of self’ and ‘self-worth’ and ‘self-image’. Now this is where the risk is highest. An exaggerated view of the lack of the above issues can cause an accelerated journey towards the grave. Why? Because I think they lose their dignity. Nobody likes to lose their sense of dignity… and should not be allowed to.

Nobody. Every person has a STORY.

Remember: it is never too late to start a weight-bearing exercise program. Never too late, no matter how old you are and how out of condition you are in.

Start. Today. Start – Now!

Two or three times per week. Put yourself in that old lady’s shoes. Seize life by the horns and take back control of your state of mind to lead you towards building muscles. Take back control of your body. Your spirit. Take care of your WHOLE – SELF.

Think about it.

Build this anti-ageing magical essence (muscle) and EMPOWER the most important person in the world to you: YOU. You have the power in your hands now to partially help your state of dignity in old age. Put those weights in your hands and lift. Lift as if your life depended on it!

The sad thing is that IT DOES. The quality of your last 20 years of your life in old age depends on the available muscle you have. Do yourself that favour before it is too late.

Back to my drive with Olivia ….

As the old lady approaches the other side of the road she looks back, produces a thankful smile and GIVES me ‘the finger’ too.

I was grateful for that gesture. I gave respect and she returned it. Thank you.

I smile again in response and say a little prayer for her as I stepped on the accelerator and drive off home with a sense of gratitude but also a sense of sadness too.

A sadness in my heart for the pain and discomfort that that lady and many aged persons like her in the world experience every single day, slowly eating away at their dignity and quality of life.

The scary thing is that these ‘aged-related illnesses’ are increasingly affecting younger generations today, but I will leave that observation for a future blog.

If there is one gift you could buy yourself or your mum/dad or grandparents that could have the biggest impact on a life – buy them a gym membership and get them help to empower themselves (physically). That could turn out to be the most important gift you may ever buy for you or your loved ones.

Everyone now, all raise ‘the finger’ to yourself in the mirror and just DO IT! Remind yourself about what “the finger” represents – respect. Respect to YOU.

“Do what? “, I hear you say.

I say: “Build, protect and preserve your muscles. It WILL serve you well in the years ahead.”

All the best in your decision.

Until next time,

Side Triceps. Australian Natural Bodybuilding Championships. Lost by 2 points. Final placing: Runner-up.

Side Triceps.
Australian Natural Bodybuilding Championships.
Lost by 2 points.
Final placing: Runner-up.

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